CaptainFaraday

sade1212 said:

Tell me.

The Rise of Stroke-haver

As for “I am a Jedi,” I’ve played around with it and it’s almost almost there but not quite. There’s a slight hum on one of the phonemes that’s a product of how crossfading audio works that I haven’t been able to find a way to correct without making the overall mix worse in the process. In any other line of dialogue I wouldn’t worry about something like that, but this is the climax of the whole movie and there’s no music or SFX to mask it, so.

Very important question time: who is Holdo’s partner pokémon?

Anakin Starkiller said:

JackNapier said:

Replace ROTS’ soundtrack with a combination of I am Machine by Three Days Grace and their album One X, in order to really give it that edgy feel.

Not Three Days Grace, but what about Paralyzer for Order 66?

I think this is the obvious choice for Anakin marching on the Temple and the clones executing Order 66.

Using the “ee” sound in “green,” change Palpatine’s line from “my little green friend” to “my little green fiend,” to alleviate confusion by making it clearer that Palpatine has animosity towards Yoda and does not actually consider him a friend.

PMs sent!

Eyepainter said:

Replace every single line in the saga with “I have a bad feeling about this.”

Replace every line with “I have a x feeling about this,” where x is a single keyword from the original sentence.

Bumping this project thread with some updates on my stuff in general:

I’m still working on everything, nothing has been dropped or abandoned, but it’s going to be at a slow pace for a while. Here’s what I’m working on, in order:

• Godzilla: Final Wars. I’m making a family-friendly edit of this very not family friendly Godzilla movie for my five year old son, so it takes precedence over anything I’m working on for myself. It’s three quarters of the way finished.
• TROS: Ascendant. I have to finish editing the Jedi Voices scene to include new dialogue of Sors Bandeam. I know a few people are pretty excited about this one. Also about three quarters done.
• TLJ: Stoic Edition. I’ve got to keep working on Rose’s new line of dialogue; other than that, it’s at the point where I’m dependent on other people to help with some short VFX shots.
• This project! The novelisation. I’m keen to get back to it, I miss writing and copyediting.
• Rogue One edit. A friend and I have a plan to edit R1 and I put together an extremely rough workprint. It’s a pretty radical reordering of some scenes which completely recontextualises and changes the narrative, and only a couple of minor trims here and there to the actual content of the scenes.
• The five hundred other ideas I have bouncing around in my head.
• The TLJ Pokémon thing, as soon as there’s enough ideas in that thread to fill the entire movie.

Anakin Starkiller said:

Why the “And so forth”? You only had one row to go!

Remove “Episode I” subtitle from TPM and pretend it was a one-off film from 1999 that was never expanded upon.

If only there were a way to make the CGI look worse so it looks properly like a product of its time (direct-to-video?) rather than the massive budget boundary-pusing pioneer 5 years ahead of its time that it was.

Put “copyright 2007 all rights reserved” underneath it.

Watch episodes 1-4, then turn around and watch 3-1 again.

Eyepainter said:

“You’ll never reach the outskirts in time. Sandstorms are very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very dangerous.”

Qui-Gon: I wish that were so.

This sets up the payoff when he is killed by Maul at the end:

Qui-Gon: (dubbed from Anakin) Yippee!

ANH, but all of Han’s scenes are replaced with scenes of Harrison Ford in the Indiana Jones films.

DrVibble said:

This looks like a formidable edit! Being a fan of Star Wars, long films, and an amateur fan editor whose first edit is likewise about 5.5 hours long, I’d love to check this edit out!

PM sent! What’s your 5.5 hour edit, out of curiosity?

Ultimate Machete Order: AOTC is the only movie you watch for the rest of your life.

PM sent!

PM sent!

I’m going to make Rose’s partner pokémon Meltan. She has it instead of the Hasian smelt medallion, and Paige has a shiny version.

It’s also easy to get the right phonemes to make Finn say “Give it back! You have no idea how much that Meltan means to her” and DJ say “Meltan - best conductor.”

PM sent!

TROS
TROS
TFA
TLJ
TROS
ROTJ
TROS
TROS
TROS

That gives me a lateral idea: I don’t know if there’s a restoration of the original Declan Mulholland Jabba scene available at good enough quality (I’ve only ever seen very patchy ones), but with some dialogue trims, it might be possible to make it seems like Declan Mulholland’s character is someone who works for Jabba.

EddieDean said:

Hal 9000 said:

With respect, I think doing a poor rotoscope would be mandatory for getting this thing made.

Yeah, I really wouldn’t worry about something as insignificant as quality here.

^ poster quote right there

act on instinct said:

Anakin Starkiller said:

Renumber the series to confuse the hell out of the audience.

Episode I: TRoS
Episode II: TESB
Episode III: TFA
Episode IV: RotS
Episode V: TPM
Episode VI: ANH
Episode VII: AotC
Episode VIII: RotJ
Episode IX: TLJ

Machete order 🚫

Dice Roll order ✅

Instead of the Machete Order to preserve the twist, the Antichete Order is designed to spoil the twist as badly as possible. Start with ESB, but start at the scene where Vader reveals he’s Luke’s father. Then jump back to TPM and watch them all in numbered order, skipping the Vader reveal scene since we already watched it.

Hal 9000 said:

With respect, I think doing a poor rotoscope would be mandatory for getting this thing made.

Oh, it’s all going to be bad, it’s just a question of where the line is between entertainingly bad and hard to watch.

jarbear said:

CaptainFaraday said:

Something I’ve been wondering for a while: what do I do with the porgs?

Rowlett. It has a similar body style. For some reason, one of the “baby” porgs you see in a nest is a Dartrix.

Perfect.

Something I’ve been wondering for a while: what do I do with the porgs?

By the way, if anyone has watched the workprint and has any feedback, please don’t be shy!