The problem with “Tell me” is that you’re just taking a line from one scene and moving it to another. If you move it over, then Leia only says the word “No” in her wayfinder conversation with Rey. That’s just laughably bad imo.
I mean, just use it twice?
I would like to see if “Tell me” would feel natural in that wide shot.
Considering TROS Mustafar looks nothing like ROTS Mustafar, I would love to see a regrade that looks like the concept art. You wouldn’t have to name it, but you could call it Wayland. Might be fitting since the Sith Fleet is reminiscent to the Thrawn trilogy’s Katana Fleet.
Hmm, I do like what you’re going for, but I also worry that using too much would make the artificiality of Leia’s performance feel even more noticeable than it was before.
At this point, I’m thinking these might be the most seamless options:
For that scene, keep Rey’s line first. Take Leia saying “Tell me” from the Exegol conversation and let that be Leia’s response in that wide shot.
Rey: Didn’t finish the training course. Got distracted.
Leia: Tell me.
Rey: I’m just not feeling myself. I know it, it looks like I’m making excuses…
Leia: Don’t tell me what things look like, tell me what they are.
I think it fits there naturally in the conversation, and I feel like that wide shot desperately needs some kind of response from Leia. It’s like Rey’s just continuing the conversation with herself while Leia just stands there. It might make more sense to have Leia say something there, than to squeeze in a line where there is not much space for the other line to breathe.
And then for the Exegol conversation, maybe we could just try to trim the pause so it feels like Leia doesn’t even have time to give Rey a reason not to go.
If we can’t get the new lines to feel seamless, this might be the best way to work with what we have.
Awesome tests!
I know there is a pretty brief time period before Rey begins speaking, but I actually think it’d be nice to combine both examples, “Well, that’s the important stuff dealt with.”
I don’t know if there is enough time to fit in Rey saying “No”. (I think having her say “I” at the beginning of that sentence would be nice, too) I think “Well” would work better if it was inflected like a question. Like, “Well?” or “So?” I know there are very limited options though.
Looking back at that scene, even if we couldn’t find something perfect to fit in the beginning, I think it would be nice to have Leia ask, “Why?” in that wide shot, at the very least. So it goes like:
Rey: Didn’t finish the training course. Got distracted.
Leia: Why?
Rey: I’m just not feeling myself.
See? Just one extra word makes it feel more like an actual conversation. “Tell me” could fit in there too.
Also, I feel like the added lines could potentially be ever so slightly pitched down or something. Leia just seems to speak a little deeper in TROS than she did in TFA, or her Lego lines more specifically.
Smart thought Neerb! I like the line, but I see what you’re saying Jar Jar. Maybe a combo of an extra word, plus shortening the silence might help sell it.
I also worry about the inflection 100% fitting the new scene, but maybe the right levels and such could help it blend. And like Neerb said, if nothing works you could just have Rey respond a little more quickly.
EDIT: I also wonder if you could slow the line down ever so slightly so it doesn’t feel so rushed.
Ooo, nice find Jar Jar! Hopefully it will fit in well with the rest of the scene.
Hmmm good idea.
I can’t go back through the lines again right now to see if this is possible but I’m pretty sure this might be.
Cool, hopefully we can find something.
I think there are two or three other places that could work well with extra bits of Leia dialogue.
When Rey says she’s gonna run the training course, as Leia hands her the saber, Leia could say, “Good”, “Alright”, “Here”. I think a funny line would work nicely here, since Leia gives her a little smirk, but I’m not sure what could fit.
I think another place that could use a Leia line would be when Rey is back at the base, and she just starts talking to Leia, who we don’t realize is off-screen until it cuts to her. In that first shot of Rey rummaging through her bag, you could have Leia say, “What happened?”, “What’s wrong?”, or even “Tell me”, which he says twice in that conversation, later on during their Exegol conversation, and again in TFA, when C-3PO tells her R2 has good news.
I was going to suggest having Leia say something like, “Here”, “It’s yours” when Leia gives Rey the saber before she leaves, but I think in this scene at least, the less that is said, the better it is.
I think even if we could find the start of a sentence. Something like, “I don’t-“, “We need to-“, “You have to-“. Then we can have Rey interrupt her.
The lack of a payoff of Finn wanting to tell Rey of his Force-sensitivity is the point.
Maybe that was their intent, but it failed in execution imo. You might understand the nuances of Abrams and Terrio’s storytelling abilities, but if the majority of the audience doesn’t really get it, then you have to ask yourself if they actually succeeded at conveying the story they were trying to tell the audience.
Anyway, it may be a good idea for us to put any new ideas on a hiatus for now, and just keep the topic on changes that are actively on the to-do list.
Just have one of those cheesy movie scenes where there is a picture of each character with a blurb of what happened to them after the events of the movie lol
Lol, just like American Graffiti. Lucas’ vision comes full circle.
My two cents on the Finn Force-sensitivity subplot:
Personally, my biggest issue with it is that we don’t really get any indication that anyone else knows that Finn is force-sensitive. Him sensing the control tower thing at the end is probably his biggest use of the Force, but honestly, Finn’s general First Order knowledge could’ve been easily been the reason he figured that out. We don’t even get an opportunity for Rey or Poe to even acknowledge his Force-sensitivity, or a hint that Finn will be Rey’s first student.
I feel like you could recontextualize the “I never told you” stuff to imply that Finn has something he never told Poe. And then Poe could give that flirty look to Finn at the end of the film, rather than Zori, implying that he has known about Finn’s feelings for him. It is still very thin, but at least there is some kind of acknowledgement of this subplot at the end of the film, unlike Finn’s force-sensitivity stuff.
With that being said, I feel like the Finn force-sensitivity thing is something Hal is fine with and would rather keep in Ascendant. It would be cool if we could come up with some better payoff at the end, that implied Rey knows and will teach Finn the ways of the Force. Since we’ve moved the holochess scene to the end, maybe we could give Finn a Padawan braid? Lol. I feel like Finn could pull that look off.
After Rey shoots lightning and we close up on her hand, a gouge on her wrist reveals wires and circuits underneath.
Somewhere, Alan Dean Foster feels an inexplicable surge of validation.
Hahaha, I literally did the same thing on another thread today.
Yes, that is it!
Thanks for the comments! I definitely think the trick is figuring out the order of scenes, as well as where to cut between them exactly. I think the music can make this a bit of a challenge.
I do agree that it would be nice to see a new regrade for the film. I think using Ady’s would work as a great base. I also feel like the flatness is partly due to the cinematography of the film. A lot of the shots, imo, feel a lot more static and less ‘inspired’ than what we saw in ANH or ESB. Unfortunately I don’t think there is much that can be done about that, besides what Ady is doing, and replacing some matte backgrounds with model work.
I would also like to possibly make a “downgraded” version of the film, sort of like Puggo’s versions of the OT. If the entire film was real dirty and grainy, you could incorporate a lot of the deleted scenes without them feeling out of place. But maybe I’d save that for a more radical Revenge of the Jedi edit.
I like that. Makes it clear that it’s a different ship.
My answer would be: Whatever is easiest to change!
I mean yeah, they never call it a prototype or one-of-a-kind in the movie, so you definitely don’t have to change it unless someone just really wanted to.
I don’t know, I think it’s somewhere on this thread or the Rise of Skywalker edit thread.
I like the idea of the red stripes being recolored to gold. That would look cool and be easier than totally replacing it.
Apparently this is what Jedha looks like after that specific Death Star scene in canon. For referencing purposes 😉
Someone made a pretty cool concept for Pasaana as Jedha. Is not as drastic as that depiction, but I think it worked well! It was basically just the planet with a giant crack across the surface that exposes the mantle. I also think an asteroid field of debris orbiting the planet could be added. Which would fit well with the movie, since we see the gang hiding in an asteroid field immediately after they leave Pasaana’s surface.
Thanks for dropping by Shamook! I’d be curious to hear about other deep fakes you would like to do or have been thinking about sometime. We always could be a sounding board for some of your thoughts/ideas.
Add the remains of Rey’s parents to Ochi’s ship as it is boarded by the heroes on Pasaana.
Fuck, that’s metal.
