Hal 9000

TROS telegraphs Ben escaping the DSII wreckage by finding an intact TIE fighter. As was already pointed out, we changed this for TROS:A to satisfy a nerdy nitpick of “Hey in ANH didn’t they say a fighter like that couldn’t get deep into space on its own?” It’s not really necessary, and future SW content beyond ANH seems to have abandoned the idea that only large craft can navigate hyperspace. Nevertheless, it felt like something worth tackling for a fan edit becausewhynot.

I don’t really feel a need to change the word ‘traveled,’ but I can if there’s another wording that I feel isn’t a compromise. We will see.

I did not capitalize anything in TROS because… why would I? Not every crawl needs to have CAPITAL LETTERS, and especially not for terms that already had CAPITAL LETTERS in prior crawls. Of the six ‘Lucas’ saga films, I believe three of them had no CAPITAL LETTERS at all, and there things capitalized in one crawl tend not to be capitalized when they appear again in subsequent crawls. TFA and TLJ each already capitalized the FIRST ORDER and RESISTANCE so I figure we can give it a rest. Otherwise the ST would be the only trilogy with CAPITAL LETTERS in each crawl.

dzabdehat said:

There’s one more thing in the crawl that I don’t think has been discussed yet, but I’ve noticed it on my first watch of V1.

In the line “Meanwhile, Supreme Leader Kylo Ren has traveled to Mustafar (…)” the word “traveled” is American English spelling. British English spelling is normally “travelled”.

I’m not sure about Hal’s other edits, but unless I’m mistaken, all theatrical Star Wars crawls have specifically avoided this problem by not using any such words.

If you’re editing the crawl, perhaps it makes sense to use another word here too e.g. “flied” or “journeyed”.

Hmm, interesting point. I think ‘traveled’ sounds more natural than those two synonyms but if it can be worded equally well I’d be okay with a change in vocabulary.

He could explain that it was just “be mean to the King day.”

Replace the score during the binary sunset in ANH with tracked music from ROTS in order to update it.

I think one of the positive things about Adywan’s ESB are the effects that are in it.

Yeah but for fan projects it’s fun to see these possibilities realized.

Give Finn one, too.

I’m with you there, Anakin.

Furthermore, comic books are not fun to read.

Cadavers, I like the way you think.

EDIT: obvious autocorrect. I didn’t fix it but wanted to say it wasn’t on purpose.

Dodanna in Rogue One.

Anakin Starkiller said:

Lando has half of his face burned off escaping the second Death Star in RotJ so Billy Dee Williams can finally become Two-Face in TRoS.

Oooh. And modify his “yeehaw!” into a bloodcurdling scream.

Yeah, it’s in there, but it’s a little softer than the mock-up.

Or… Bane???

The movie certainly doesn’t want to tell you. Or have any idea itself.

I would also worry about unintended resonance between those two lines.

“You’re just a clone.”

“Your clone. What Palpatine stood for, what he fought for… that’s not gone.”

“Luke, help me take this mask off.”

“But you’ll die.”

“That is what I want. You will be Vader. We will be one.”

That’s right, there’s no telling what timeframe it’ll be on in the end. I’d say if he can generate any clips we’ll be happy to parse them but it’s all right if he can’t.

If you’ve got appropriate sounds send them and I can try folding them into what’s there. Or if you’d like to lay some down yourself and send me the mix to be overlaid with what’s already there, that’d be fine too.

Flipping through the movie, and there are a few lines that help the line change of “I’m a Jedi” quite a bit. Things like, “She’ll never be a Jedi - Make sure of it” and “You tried to prove to my mother that you’re a Jedi, but you’ve proven something else.”

Right… which means it doesn’t count? Again, let’s keep this thread focused on the project it’s about.

TestingOutTheTest said:

Hal 9000 said:

I thought she was there two thirds of the way through TLJ, but yes, you’re right.

Nope.

Let’s drop it, unless you want to take it to a more appropriate thread.

YouTube saw fit to present this to me: https://youtu.be/kMmwpu22YIk

We will change the crawl to make that small adjustment.

I’m still open to Kijimigraffiti! But it’ll depend on what gets generated. And it’s not necessary for coherency.

I thought she was there two thirds of the way through TLJ, but yes, you’re right.

I imagine that feeling jarring. The line as it stands begins with “I…” which means something is coming to clarify the “I’m all the Sith and YOU are nothing” thing.

“We…” would already feel confusing before the sentence could get finished.”

Yeah. Stretching that timeframe helps the chronology for the characters’ ages in the OT, too.