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oojason

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Join date
5-May-2004
Last activity
14-Dec-2025
Posts
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Post
#257839
Topic
Bond, James Bond
Link
https://originaltrilogy.com/post/id/257839/action/topic#257839
Time
^ thought it was a good film too (cgi ski chase and title lyrics apart)

I thought the tune was quite good - would have made a good choice of music for a Bond chase sequence or similar - but the lyrics and their delivery were limited.


Must admit I really loike the Casino Royale tune - though have no idea what it's called or who sang it

Post
#257632
Topic
Jokes thread : Reloaded
Link
https://originaltrilogy.com/post/id/257632/action/topic#257632
Time
^


Probably heard before, but still makes me chuckle...



A military pilot had been having difficulty with smooth landings and the crew was required to make note of the exact time the plane landed at different bases. One particular landing took several bounces before staying on the ground. The crew reportedly called up to the pilot, "Which landing shall we note for the record, Sir?" (Ack A & M Martin)


Tower: "Delta 351, you have traffic at 10 o'clock, 6 miles!"
Delta 351: "Give us another hint! We have digital watches!"


"TWA 2341, for noise abatement turn right 45 Degrees."
"Centre, we are at 35,000 feet. How much noise can we make up here?"
"Sir, have you ever heard the noise a 747 makes when it hits a 727?"


From an unknown aircraft waiting in a very long takeoff queue: "I'm f...ing bored!"
Ground Traffic Control: "Last aircraft transmitting, identify yourself immediately!"
Unknown aircraft: "I said I was f...ing bored, not f...ing stupid!"


Control tower to a 747: "United 329 heavy, your traffic is a Fokker, one o'clock, three miles, Eastbound."
United 239: "Approach, I've always wanted to say this.... I've got the little Fokker in sight."


A DC-10 had come in a little hot and thus had an exceedingly long roll out after touching down. San Jose Tower noted: "American 751, make a hard right turn at the end of the runway, if you are able. If you are not able, take the Guadalupe exit off Highway 101, make a right at the lights and return to the airport."


A military pilot called for a priority landing because his single-engine jet fighter was running "a bit peaked." Air Traffic Control told the fighter pilot that he was number two, behind a B-52 that had one engine shut down. "Ah," the fighter pilot remarked, "The dreaded seven-engine approach."


Allegedly, a Pan Am 727 flight waiting for start clearance in Munich overheard the following:
Lufthansa (in German): "Ground, what is our start clearance time?"
Ground (in English): "If you want an answer you must speak in English."
Lufthansa (in English): "I am a German, flying a German airplane, in Germany. Why must I speak English?"
Unknown voice from another plane (in a beautiful British accent): "Because you lost the bloody war."


Tower: "Eastern 702, cleared for takeoff, contact Departure on frequency 124.7"
Eastern 702: "Tower, Eastern 702 switching to Departure. By the way, after we lifted off we saw some kind of dead animal on the far end of the runway."
Tower: "Continental 635, cleared for takeoff behind Eastern 702, contact Departure on frequency 124.7. Did you copy that report from Eastern 702?"
Continental 635: "Continental 635, cleared for takeoff, roger; and yes, we copied Eastern... we've already notified our caterers."


One day the pilot of a Cherokee 180 was told by the tower to hold short of the active runway while a DC-8 landed. The DC-8 landed, rolled out, turned around, and taxied back past the Cherokee. Some quick-witted comedian in the DC-8 crew got on the radio and said, "What a cute little plane. Did you make it all by yourself?" The Cherokee pilot, not about to let the insult go by, came back with a real zinger: "I made it out of DC-8 parts. Another landing like yours and I'll have enough for another one."


Allegedly the German air controllers at Frankfurt Airport are renowned as a short-tempered lot. They, it is alleged, not only expect one to know one's gate parking location, but how to get there without any assistance from them. So it was with some amusement that we (a Pan Am 747) listened to the following exchange between Frankfurt ground control and a British Airways 747, call sign Speedbird 206.
Speedbird 206: "Frankfurt, Speedbird 206 clear of active runway."
Ground: "Speedbird 206. Taxi to gate Alpha One-Seven." The BA 747 pulled onto the main taxiway and slowed to a stop.
Ground: "Speedbird, do you not know where you are going?"
Speedbird 206: "Stand by, Ground, I'm looking up our gate location now."
Ground (with quite arrogant impatience): "Speedbird 206, have you not been to Frankfurt before?"
Speedbird 206 (coolly): "Yes, twice in 1944, but it was dark,... and I didn't land."


Allegedly, while taxiing at London's Gatwick Airport, the crew of a US Air flight departing for Ft. Lauderdale made a wrong turn and came nose to nose with a United 727. An irate female ground controller lashed out at the US Air crew, screaming: "US Air 2771, where the hell are you going?! I told you to turn right onto Charlie taxiway! You turned right on Delta! Stop right there. I know it's difficult for you to tell the difference between C and D, but get it right!" Continuing her rage to the embarrassed crew, she was now shouting hysterically: "God! Now you've screwed everything up! It'll take forever to sort this out! You stay right there and don't move till I tell you to! You can expect progressive taxi instructions in about half an hour and I want you to go exactly where I tell you, when I tell you, and how I tell you! You got that, US Air 2771?" US Air 2771: "Yes, ma'am," the humbled crew responded. Naturally, the ground control communications frequency fell terribly silent after the verbal bashing of US Air 2771. Nobody wanted to chance engaging the irate ground controller in her current state of mind. Tension in every cockpit out around Gatwick was definitely running high. Just then an unknown pilot broke the silence and keyed his microphone, asking: "Wasn't I married to you once?"





Post
#257154
Topic
Bond, James Bond
Link
https://originaltrilogy.com/post/id/257154/action/topic#257154
Time
Thoroughly enjoyed watching Casino Royale earlier tonight - Daniel Craig is a welcome return to a more rugged Bond, the stunts were superb - yet etched in realism, the story held interest throughout, the women were great as ever, and for me was a very strong and engaging movie.

I left the cinema certainly wanting to see a follow-up 007 film soon

Post
#255186
Topic
MOVED THREAD (Guy Fawkes Day)
Link
https://originaltrilogy.com/post/id/255186/action/topic#255186
Time
Originally posted by: Number20
Originally posted by: Darth Chaltab
Guy Fawkes is supposed to be celebrated?


Guy Fawkes Day is a British Holiday, were they would burn Guy Fawkes in effigy and stuff like that. I don't think it is really that important of a holiday anymore, but some of our members from the UK might be able to correct me if I'm wrong.




Guy Fawkes Day - or 'Bonfire Night' as it seems to be increasingly better known as - still attracts large crowds to organised bonfire and firework displays. The dressing a guy up (aka 'penny for the guy') isn't that popular anymore.

I suppose the actual day still a popular event on the calendar - but doubt many people could actually tell the story of what the whole thing is about. It certainly isn't taught in history in schools - probably be offensive to those who like going around blowing things up



Post
#255179
Topic
Jokes thread : Reloaded
Link
https://originaltrilogy.com/post/id/255179/action/topic#255179
Time
Not that funny, but made me chuckle a bit...


10 Ways To Freak Out Your Flatmate:-



10) Collect potatoes. Paint faces on them and give them names. Name one after your flatmate. Separate your flatmate's potato from the others. Wait a few days, and then bake your flatmate's potato and eat it. Explain to your flatmate, saying 'He just didn't belong'

9) Move everything to one side of the room. Ask your flatmate if he knows how much an elephant weighs, and look at the floor on the empty side of the room with concern.

8.Cool Draw a tiny black line on your nose. Make it bigger every day. Look at it and say, 'the hair, it's growing. Growing!'

7) Buy some knives. Sharpen them every night. While you're doing so, look at your flatmate and mutter, 'Soon, soon...'

6) Collect hundreds of pens and pile them on one side of the room. Keep one pencil on the other side of the room. Laugh at the pencil.

5) Tell your flatmate, 'I've got an important message for you.' Then pretend to faint. When you recover, say you can't remember what the message was. Later on, say, 'Oh, yeah, I remember!' Pretend to faint again. Keep this up for several weeks.

4) While your flatmate is out, glue your shoes to the ceiling. When your flatmate walks in, sit on the floor, hold your head, and moan.

3) Make a sandwich. Don't eat it, leave it on the floor. Ignore the sandwich. Wait until your flatmate gets rid of it, and then say, 'Hey, where the f**k is my sandwich!?' Complain loudly that you are hungry.

2) Every time your flatmate walks in yell, 'Hooray! You're back!' as loud as you can and dance around the room for five minutes. Afterwards, keep looking at your watch and saying, 'Shouldn't you be going somewhere?'

1) Talk back to your Rice Krispies. All of a sudden, act offended, throw the bowl on the floor and kick it. Refuse to clean it up, explaining, 'No, I want to watch them suffer.'


Post
#253235
Topic
Jokes thread : Reloaded
Link
https://originaltrilogy.com/post/id/253235/action/topic#253235
Time
^ superb stuff

Who says you can't get a good education these days?




A guy goes to the supermarket and notices a beautiful blonde woman wave at him and say 'hello'.

He's rather taken aback, because he can't place where he knows her from.

So he says, "Do you know me?"

To which she replies, "I think you're the father of one of my kids."

Now his mind travels back to the only time he has ever been unfaithful to his wife and says,

"My God, are you the stripper from my bachelor party that I laid on the pool table, with all my buddies

watching, while your partner whipped my butt with wet celery and I then shagged senseless?"

She looks into his eyes and calmly says, "No... I'm your son's maths teacher."





A teacher asks her class, "If there are 5 birds sitting on a fence and you shoot one of them, how many will be left?" She calls on little Johnny.

"None, they all fly away with the first gunshot."

The teacher replies, "The correct answer is 4, but I like your thinking."

Then Little Johnny says, "I have a question for YOU. There are three women sitting on a bench having ice cream. One is delicately licking the sides of the triple scoop of ice cream. The second is gobbling down the top and sucking the cone. The third is biting off the top of the ice cream. Which one is married?"

The teacher, blushing a great deal, replies, "Well I suppose the one that's gobbled down the top and sucked the cone."

"The correct answer is the one with the wedding ring on... but I like your thinking."


Post
#253234
Topic
Announcing: OT.Com Online Chess Tournament
Link
https://originaltrilogy.com/post/id/253234/action/topic#253234
Time

Seems all the games from the ot.com Tournament have been completed


The final rankings were:-

1st - Skipper (Whitehaven)
2nd - oojason
3rd - Warbler
4th - Shimy (Shimraa)
5th - KingsClash (JediSage)
6th - DirtyWookie (HotRod)
7th - Ricardo
= 7th - Ricarleite



A chart of all the matches results can be found at:-

http://www.schemingmind.com/minitournament.aspx?tournament_id=624



Big kudos and thanks go to JediSage for setting the whole thing up - cheers mate it was most appreciated


Let's hope we have another tournament soon...



Post
#251939
Topic
MagnoliaFan Edits: Ep I "Balance Of The Force", and Ep II "The Clone War" (Released)
Link
https://originaltrilogy.com/post/id/251939/action/topic#251939
Time
MagFan - will you be changing the line 'the droids HAVE been neutralised' to 'the droid ARE being neutralised' - just a really small nitpick as the fight is still going between the Jedi and droids when the drone on the bridge of the ship makes his statement ot the Viceroy.

Also, perhaps the line 'The Jedi have have triggered an alarm in the ventilation shaft' instead of 'they have triggered an alarm in the ventilation shaft' ?

and instead of 'that won't stop them' maybe the line 'that will not stop them' when Viceroy's mate refers to the Destroyers not being able to keep the Jedi from the Bridge ?


^ just an idea mate - am looking forward to seeing your latest work