Vultural

Ramen Heads - 2017 - 6/10
AKA - 映画「ラーメンヘッズ」公式サイト

Documentary of Osamu Tomita, Japan’s king of ramen.
Shows what goes into his thick broth, as well as noodle techniques.
Outside are lengthy queues for his affordable $8.00 bowls.
A few other shops and chefs are shown briefly, though not enough as far as I was concerned.
Like many, ramen noodles were a staple of my impoverished college youth.
Moreover, I still eat ramen (with far more vegetables than shown here) and was hoping to steal some ideas.
Most of the chefs are male, all of the interviewed diners were male.

She Stoops To Conquer - 2003 - 7/10

Theatre junkies, gather round!
During the Covid lockdown, the National Theatre began limited airing of stage classics.
Fathers arrange for their offspring to marry.
Daughter Kate, being appraised, appreciates some qualities of her prospective partner, dislikes others.
Respectful milquetoast or preening reprobate?
Arriving late, suitor Marlow is falsely advised his potential father-in-law is actually the innkeeper.
Misassumptions mount. Situations are exploited. Characters find gracious manners tested.
Oliver Goldsmith’s play from 1773 remains a funny, insightful hoot.

Deadline At Dawn - 1946 - 6/10

Cockeyed murder mystery set in sleepless Gotham.
Sailor on shore leave wakes up with limited memory and a pocket stuffed with money.
Back tracing his steps, he discovers the corpse of the female who had earlier taken his payday.
Wait! He also meets a dime-a-dance girl who reluctantly tries to help him.
He is greener than Kansas corn, she is big city bitter. Will they hit it off? C’mon.
Script by playwright Clifford Odets is peculiar is numerous ways.
Dialogue is arch and stilted throughout. Characters employ erudite words and oddly constructed sentences.
The dance girl (a glowing Susan Hayward) is soon joined by a cabbie, then a slew of riders.
Characters who ought to disappear, squeeze tighter in the cab’s back seat. Numerous red herrings.
Fast paced mystery held my interest throughout, mostly for those odd details.

The Look Of Love - 2013 - 5/10

Sweeping bio of Soho smut peddler, Paul Raymond, played by Steve Coogan.
Fun to watch as Raymond grows from nudie revues to glossy mens mags to acquiring huge real estate holdings.
Not much depth, however, as years roll from 1958 to 1992 in 101 minutes.
Needless to say, the story was a touch of this, a dash of that, sifted in a shallow bowl.

Nemuri Kyôshirô: In The Spider’s Lair - 1968 - 7/10
AKA - Sleepy Eyes Of Death: In The Spider’s Lair (The Human Tarantula)
AKA - Nemuri Kyōshirō 11: Hito hada kumo

In this next to the last installment, Nemuri returns to his childhood village, ever seeking his origins.
Nemuri was the bastard offspring of a raped Japanese female and Satanic / Christian missionary.
Most of the village has been emptied by the nearby castle, home to two disgraced offspring of the Shogun.
As is so often in these films, nobility is corrupt, lecherous, and monstrously evil.
Numerous sword fights and beddings of willing and unwilling females lead to a terrific battle finale.
Film has a great Spaghetti Western score, and the shot composition is impeccable.
Sword fights in this series are always something to behold.
Ichikawa amazing to watch. This was shot months before he died from cancer.

The Gay Bride - 1934 - 6/10

Carole Lombard plays a gold-digger showgirl who targets loaded racketeers.
She is so focused on the prize she fails to see “business” is failing.
Chester Morris plays the Boss’s go-to guy, detail keeper, etc …
He has the best lines and is cynical to the core. His banter with the digger is deadly.
Lombard, however, overacts and is more than annoying with her schtick.
Aspects were likely adjusted after the Production Code was enforced, yet this remains a sour piece of candy.

The Garden Murder Case - 1935 - 6/10

Philo Vance mystery finds our sleuth sniffing amongst the well heeled set.
(Well, how much money is to be made helping poor folks?)
Steeplechase jockey murmurs repeatedly that he will die in his next race.
And so he does!
More deaths follow, with a gold-digging niece the obvious suspect.
Luckily, she’s been making damsel eyes at old Philo, a known thorn to police types.
Breezy, a bit boring, dulled by indifferent chemistry between our leads.

Crowther, Peter - The Longest Single Note

Generous, very generous collection from Mr. Crow, who bears a hybrid of UK and USA styles.
Most of the stories are very good, honing in on isolated and disenfranchised souls, watching death in action.
“Gallagher’s Arm” is overtly Lovecraftian, in setting, in tone, in subject matter.
In “Home Comforts,” father and daughter drive cross country, post epidemic, scrounging food and fuel where they can, yet ever searching for the villain who traumatized the girl.
“Shatsi” observes the kidnapper, actually cat-napper, a smooth planner who knows the score. A hard boiled alley of the deluded.
“Too Short A Death,” one of the longer tales, is haunting. The reporter (fan) tries to find the obscure poet (Weldon Kees) who had vanished mysteriously.
In “Forest Plains,” a tribal member rolls easy into the sleepy backwater. The town is dying, bypassed by the Inter-State highway. Not that all dead, or dying, are at peace.
Mine is a Cemetery Dance edition, published in the 1990’s, when that publisher boasted an impressive run of authors and titles.

Anhedonia - 2019 - 7/10

Violinist Kino is asked to deliver a cassette to his mentor, a composer.
He sets off, on foot, across the empty landscape.
The cassette had been meant for a film score, except the music was shattering.
Listeners are reduced to despair, to suicide, to incompetence. Varies per individual.
And yes, deadly rivals seek the tape.
Bleak film proves a heady experience.
Spare dialogue, mirroring the scenery, ranges from profound to pompous to cryptic.
The film, something of a surreal, existential mystery, will intoxicate or irritate.
γνῶθι σεαυτόν

Wanted - 2008 - 5/10

Stale actioner based on comic book.
James McAvoy, with support from bit players like Terence Stamp, Morgan Freeman, and Angelina Jolie, plays office drone sucked into shadowy group called The Fraternity.
Group of assassins who have been operating for a thousand years, selecting kill targets based on the thread pattern from a weaving loom.
If elements sounds vaguely like The Matrix, brace yourself for an overload of “bullet time.”
Main character scuttles and whines throughout, many sequences were preposterous ( rats & wristwatches ), plot about as original as a stale taco.
Director Bekmambetov helmed Russian Night Watch, Day Watch, and Abe Lincoln: Vampire Hunter.
Cheese over excellence, though creative at points, when not derivative.

Nightmare Detective - 2006 - 6/10
AKA - Akumu Tantei // 悪夢探偵

Kagenuma has the “gift” or curse of being able to enter into client’s dreams - or nightmares.
Police detective Kirishima seeks his assistance with a string of violent suicides, that she believes are murders.
Alright premise, although the leads are depressed downers, lack chemistry, lack screen presence.
Yes, there are ongoing killings of a supernatural origin.
Film makers render this with rapid camera movement and tossing stuff around the set.
Color has been heavily desaturated to heighten the gloomy ambiance.
Bearable for awhile, becomes monotonous, finally another cure for insomnia.

Rich Hall’s California Stars - 2014 - 6/10

Scattershot history of the Golden State, named after a mythological Amazon queen.
Proceedings are hit n miss, though Hall avoids obvious fruit fly jokes or easy targets.
Instead, he gets right down to ridiculing fevered fortune hunters who flocked to California during the Gold Rush, then skewers robber barons who enriched themselves with the Central Pacific, and this bodes well.
To my mind, he spends way too much time on the Okie migration, possibly because this reinforces his Southwestern shtick. The flow and pace seem to puddle at this point.
The first third is mercilessly funny. Front loaded with acid jokes. His withering comments of the witless Occupy Movement is laugh out loud funny.
The middle third chugs to amused entertainment.
Runs outta gas by the last act. Hall yaks on and on, the humor evaporates.
I watch and wish it was better. Too bad.

The Captive - 1915 - 6/10

Set in Montenegro during the Montenegrin–Ottoman War of the late 1870’s.
While Montenegrin men are off fighting the Turks, the state allows Turkish prisoners to be used as farm labor.
Thus, a Turkish noble now works as servant for a peasant girl.
This is not so much a romance, as an accommodation.
He grows accustomed to the work, as well as the girl, her little brother, and the farm animals.
Brief spells of see-saw fighting serve to enliven dull domesticity.
Early Cecil B. DeMille film is well composed and lacks his later over-indulgences.
The Olive Films version is well restored, nicely tinted, with a fine score.

Istanbul - 1957 - 5/10

Disappointing yarn of smuggling and intrigue set in Turkey.
Weathered and world weary Errol Flynn does well as expat piloting shady flights.
Plot involved missing diamonds, murder, cops n collectors. Nothing special.
Interesting supporting cast includes Nat King Cole, Werner Klemperer, and Thorin Thatcher. The female lead is too young for Flynn - or everyone else in the movie.
Within two years Flynn would enjoy a major comeback and be shortlisted for Oscar nominations (The Sun Also Rises).
At this stage, however, he was still living on Zaca, his sailing yacht, on the run from tax collectors, acting in films in various ports of call.
I had small expectations storywise, but this was a Technicolor film, shot in exotic Istanbul.
The print was fuzzy and washed out. Not a great flick, but would grade a point higher for a restored print.

Wrestling Women Vs. The Killer Robot - 1969 - 6/10
AKA - Las Luchadoras vs el Robot Asesino

Buxom, full figured athletes square off in front of an arena of enthusiastic fans!
Meanwhile, a mysterious robot (wearing suit, fedora and sunglasses) kidnaps scientists!
Police attempt to investigate, yet they are easily distracted by curvaceous wrestlers.
Toss in a megalomaniacal scientist and a dimwitted, lustful humanoid failure.
Highly entertaining Mexican gem smokes along.
There are five or so ringside bouts, while the murderous robot busts down doors and karate chops victims.
Cosmopolitan cinema for the connoisseur.

The Lady Vanishes - 2013 - 5/10

Glossy remake of “The Wheel Spins” by Ethel Lina White, on which Hitchcock based his 1938 classic.
Young flapper meets spinster on a train through the Balkans.
When the old woman disappears, and all passengers declare they never saw her, the girl investigates.
This telling is supposedly more faithful to the book. No Nazis, just scandal and intrigue.
Nice costumes, claustrophobic train compartments (even a library car), and enigmatic strangers.
Unfortunately, the female lead is extremely unsympathetic. Rude, entitled, selfish.
You want someone, anyone, to eject her from the train. Hopefully when it is on a bridge. A high one.
Blame bad directing and a script too modern for this period piece.
Otherwise, passable wet afternoon film.

The Man Who Was Sherlock Holmes - 1937 - 6/10
AKA - Der Mann, Der Sherlock Holmes War

Two men halt the midnight train, then climb aboard.
One carries a violin case and smokes a pipe, the other seems a medical man.
The conductor and guards immediately jump to the conclusion, “This is Sherlock Holmes!”
Not necessarily, though the pair exploit the misassumptions constantly.
They are sucked into a “Russian Dolls” mystery within mystery within mystery.
Brisk comedy, thriller is quite fun, and despite being a Reichsfilme, strikes me as propaganda free.

Lake Of Dracula - 1971 - 5/10
AKA - Noroi no Yakata: Chi o Suu me // 呪いの館 血を吸う眼[

The Carpathian count buys lakefront property?
No no. Muddled Japanese homage to Hammer films.
Apparently, several generations earlier, the count did a bit spawning with a Japanese female. (Forget the notion of vampires being sterile). A hundred years later, the bloodlust DNA emerges.
Slow going, predictable, clichéd. I kept studying 70’s clothes, hairstyles, and interiors.
Characters are downright clueless.
Truck arrives and unloads the coffin into the house. Two sisters observe uncomfortably, then go shopping!
Another incident, an unconscious girl is rushed to Emergency. Almost drained of blood!
Doctors and nurses notice two punctures on her neck, then decide, “We will ask her about those when she wakes up.”

A Heart In Winter - 1992 - 7/10
AKA - Un Coeur En Hiver

Two men run a classical instrument restoration business.
One is the suave, well-connected owner, the other is the technical genius.
The owner is smitten with a brilliant, beautiful violinist, but her curiosity is aroused by his austere partner.
Not really a ménage à trois, this story is more attraction - infatuation - obsession.
The tone is chilly throughout, most of the characters are reserved or repressed.
Ravel’s music is an emotional counterpoint in a story where characters alternately pursue and shun each other.

A Smell Of Blood – 2015 - 6/10
AKA - Un Parfum de Sang

Above, the master perfurmer trains the new “nose”, his proposed successor.
At stake, the future of the renowned fragrance house.
Mind you, this was before the murder.
And, this is AFTER a previous, unsolved murder decades earlier.
With the same gun.
OK crime mystery set in the world of fragrant rivalries and jealousy.
Superficial romance elements add little to this follow-the-clues story.

Judas And The Black Messiah - 2021 - 8/10

Outstanding study of the snitch within the Black Panther chapter of Chicago.
Time frame = circa 1966 - 1969.
Low end thief is recruited (pressured) by the FBI to infiltrate the Panthers and report back.
An uneasy film to view, watching law enforcement repeatedly sidestep or violate laws.
The narrative strikes me as accurate. Years earlier, I had viewed Black Panthers: Vanguard Of The Revolution (2015), as well as Eyes On The Prize (1990).
Fred Hampton, the target of the FBI, was viewed by them as extraordinarily dangerous.
His message of resisting oppression resonated in 60’s Chicago. Not only with blacks, but Puerto Ricans and poor whites from Appalachia. Class struggle knew no race. Overlords have since wised up, in my opinion.

Crime Squad - 2011 - 6/10
AKA - Detectives In Trouble // 강력반

Episodic police procedural, K-drama.
The opening 15-20 minutes of E01 are sheer crap!
Really. Flatulent jokes, toilet scenes, folks fanning the air.
Afterward, the series never returns to moronic antics, so keep this in mind if curious.
The four man team investigate a new crime every couple weeks.
Most are imperiled females. Bullied, battered, stalked, tortured, murdered.
The rebellious Officer Park is shadowed by perky Reporter Jo.
Will they connect? Are there clouds in the sky?
Characters are likeable clichés.
Middling, and mid-pack as far as K-drama crime shows go.

Kiss Of The Damned - 2012 - 5/10

Another vampire spin.
Scriptwriter is sent to Connecticut to work on a Hollywood project.
In the video rental store (huh?) he meets a hot babe.
He pursues, though she warns him repeatedly.
Safe sex ensues, meaning she is shackled with massive steel chains to her four poster.
When she gets aroused her beast emerges. Does he flee? Of course not, he’s a writer.
He unshackles her (?). They bounce, she bites.
In time, the usual coven of fangsters appear, elegant and wealthy, for off-Broadway plays and cocktails.
Arthouse twaddle directed by Xan Cassavetes (John’s daughter), which violates numerous vampire rules:
Vampire seen in mirrors. Drink of choice, synthetic blood. Living prey, forest animals. Latter example, possum.
Dark, moody film, with not enough time given to bloodthirsty, dysfunctional sister.

I’m From Hollywood - 1989 - 7/10

Terrific documentary / satire / sport-a-rama.
Andy Kaufman takes on womenfolk and baits the Memphis crackers in the Inter-Gender Wrestling matches.
From this, the epic feud with Jerry Lawler started.
Wrestling was no less fake in the early 80’s than it is today, but steroid inflated gorks were not the fixtures.
Interviews with Marilu Henner, Robin Williams, Tony Danza.
Also clips of Kaufman urging Southern women to shave their legs, and locals to discover soap and toilet tissue.
Brilliant.

Antidote - 2021 - 6/10

After her appendicitis bursts, Sharyn is rushed to the hospital.
Complications arise and she wakes in a different medical facility.
The experimental kind. And she is the latest in a huge section of test patients.
Horror film fits into the subgenre of “hospital horror.”
For a budget film, quality actors have been cast, though the gray complex resembles a bunker.
Unlike most hospital horror, this is one busy place, with orderlies, nurses, and plenty of horrible procedures.
Only a handful of characters are shown, yet most have backstories which we discover.
The producers tried for an unusual, original ending. I did not necessarily buy it, but I laud the attempt.