Vultural

Bubba Ho-Tep - 2002 - 6/10

Retirement home denizens, Elvis and JFK, grow wary of a new arrival.
Despite boots and the felt Stetson, it might could be an abandoned mummy.
And it is killin’ folks in the home dead.
They’re old, they’re weak, and nurses would just reckon they done died natural like.
Our two heroes, one is a wheelchair, the other with a walker, devise a plan and stand tall.
Ridiculous, absurd, hairbrained. Yeah, so what?
Cheap Horror comedy has a lot of heart and is boosted immensely by Bruce Campbell and Ossie Davis.

Defence Of The Realm - 1986 - 7/10

British reporters get wind of a scandal involving a member of Parliament.
Is the MP having an affair? Is he a KGB operative?
Not that it matters, it’s too good a story and run it.
Only later, do they realize the man may have been framed – and they were manipulated.
Clandestine agencies, stonewalling, and mounting threats to cease investigating.
Tight thriller encompasses all, along with a message that is still relevant.

A Midsummer Night’s Sex Comedy - 1982 - 6/10

Aged professor and young wife celebrate solstice in the country.
Also there is the professor‘s cousin and her nutty husband (Allen).
Add a lecherous physician and his free-spirit girlfriend.
Blame the summer heat, blame the moon. Everyone is soon in and out of each other’s pants.
Another Bergman inspired Woody Allen effort, mixing drama and comedy.
The comedy seems a throwback to his earlier, juvenile period, and doesn’t quite work.

Breaking The Waves - 1996 - 7/10

Bess misses oil rigger husband Jan, emotionally and sexually, and prays to God to return him.
And lo, God responds. Jan is injured, badly, and flown back. Paralyzed.
To save him, the devoutly religious Bess, begins offering herself to increasingly brutish men.
Widely acclaimed film, notable for Emily Watson’s fearless performance.
This is really an uncomfortable watch, however. Score above is for Watson, period.
The director, I felt, took delight in his mistreatment of Bess … and other women in subsequent films.
I am not a fan of Dogma 95, nor of this director.

Swede Caroline - 2024 - 6/10

“Those two are the main rivals in the Big Veg world. Like Cassius Clay versus Muhammad Ali, yeah.”
Welcome to the world of large vegetable competitions.
Where competitors will do any and everything to secure that plastic trophy.
Like threatening, stealing, kidnapping, even – gasp! – murder.
This mockumentary follows Caroline, or Caro, grower of the largest marrow.
Or is it? Surely the judges are not corrupt, as well?
Hit and miss spoof. Enjoyment depends on how well you take to characters.

Ward, C. E. - Ghostly Quarters

Four novellas, all bearing the lingering echoes of M. R. James to varying degree.

The family vacations at Stowby-by-Sea, a faded seaside town that had know better days, and would only know worse in its future. Idling a break, mother and son take turn about the town, then turn into the “Promenade Walk” arriving at an emporium of antiques, relics, treasure, junk. Only it is closed. No matter. The mother had been alarmed and left hurriedly.
Years pass, along with a few more outings, and the young man continues to be drawn to the shop. More so, it appears, even after he learns bits of the murky history of the proprietor and his family.

James unexpectedly inherits a country estate, manor and grounds. A series of deaths had filled “Some Episodes Of A Family History” causing the fortuitous bequest. The estate is too much for one person, and the solicitor assumes James will sell. The new owner, however, is curious, especially after he hears that the place has a “history”, and, as one character declares, “it isn’t very pleasant.”

The most Jamesian of the novellas is “Warlock’s End”. The manor had been renamed by a sinister new arrival to Prior’s Bromley. Domineering type, self-possessed and apparently able to hex any opposition, literally. For fans of Mr. Karswell, the stylish Lucian Starlight could pass for his brother.

Dead Calm - 1989 - 6/10

Rae and John sail the Great Barrier Reef, still grieving over the death of son.
They rescue the lone survivor of a sinking boat.
When John decides to investigate the damaged craft the survivor seizes control and leaves with his ship.
What follows is tense thriller between wife Rae and the rescuee, Hughie, immature and treacherous.
Sam Neill has a thankless role as John, chasing in an ever-sinking tub.
Nicole Kidman runs a gamut from desperate, calculating, formidable.
Third role, Billy Zane, unforgettable as the polite, apologetic, lying, lethal Hughie.

Forbidden - 1932 - 6/10

Small town librarian, Lulu, realizes life is passing her by.
She empties her savings account and boards a cruise to Havana.
Lulu enjoys a shipboard romance with a distinguished lawyer.
Which continues all the way back to New York.
Even though he is slightly married, the affair escalates.
Birth control? In the 1930’s? Oops.
Stanwyck and Menjou are great together, with Bellamy a conniving heel.
First third really moves, making for an enjoyable Pre-Code.
Sadly, for me, the plot slowly settles into Capra schmaltz.

Madame Sousatzka - 1988 - 6/10

Russian pianist, who never quite made the professional ranks, trains gifted pupils.
Her latest is from India, and his mother works slavishly to move his career.
Sousatzka is a fire-breather … with a heart of gold.
Sounds like a cliché? Well, not quite.
She finds the talent, grooms them, hones them, only to watch them vanish up the ladder.
To the wealthy agent, the famous instructor. Sousatzka is forever a minor league manager.
MacLaine excels in this, and I am not normally a fan of her work.

Predator (Prey) - Maniac

Filesize = 6.8 GB, Video = 1920 X 1080p, Audio = 1536 kbps, 5.1 DTS.

This is pared down to 65 minutes, losing NOTHING that would be essential.
Picture wise, a very dark film; the blacks are gorgeous and solid.
Dialogue is English, rather than Comanche. No subs.
Naru is given pretty much the same time as the alien hunter.
The savage violence, straight up the food chain, abides, as do some of the lulls and pauses.
During one of the ceremonies, the noise and revelry has been replaced with ambiant music.
The narrative is coherent despite losing about a half hour.
As always, Maniac’s video editing is flawless, the sound mix outstanding.

AvP Redux (Alien Vs Predator Requiem) - truetypesounds

Filesize = 3 GB, Video = 1920 X 1080p, Audio = 251 kbps, “5.1 AAC”.

I view this as a cautionary training film. Not for the faneditor, who has done an interesting job here, but for Predator recruits.
Trimmed to 35”, and viewed mostly from the predator’s point of view, this an exercise in how everything that can go wrong in a cleanup mission will go wrong.
Our protagonist is pretty soon over its head. Does it summon backup? No.
Are aliens multipling quicker than it can dispose of them? Ha.
I can picture Predator drill instructors ordering trainees to view this and learn.
At 35” AvP Redux is pretty fragmented, mostly mayhem. Brightness remains absurdly dark.
5.1 AAC was not accurate. Audacity indicated only 2-Channel stereo, other channels flatlined.

Friday the 13th Part V: Jason’s Legacy - LastSurvivor

Overview - Botched relaunch of the Friday 13th franchise, **New Beginning" was widely scorned by Jason fanboys. Root failure stems from atrocious writing, though inept, formulaic direction did not help, nor did primarily grade D acting which rarely rose above high school level. Last Survivor remedies those deficiencies by slight rearranging of the plot and extensive trimming.

Video - As would be expected of this editor, quality work here. Picture remains solid throughout. Blacks are stable, and this is a dark film. In rearranging, there is always the risk of shifts in light, especially outdoor lighting, yet there is none of that. One peculiar “error” occurs at 47.36 when the Paramount logo flashes. I take this is left in as a grindhouse joke but it is distracting.

Audio - Solid two channel audio, which is probably more than needed, when mono would have been fine. Dialogue always clear, as is every footstep, and every noisy mode of death.

Narrative - With wholesale editing, there is the risk of losing coherence. Logic does suffer slightly. It is hard to keep up with characters, who even in the original, were little more than the next meal. The whole edit has an outta control roller coaster ride feel to it, though I found that a good thing.

Enjoyment - Never my favorite Friday 13th episode, LS’s edit is a major improvement. His streamlined plot tries to vault plot nonsense with mostly good results (Though one might still wonder about the nonsensical camp for what? Horny teenage delinquents? Funded by our tax dollars?). Some will be disappointed by less kills, but Debisue Voorhees and her spectacular picnic spread remains. So say we all.

Into The Mud - 2016 - 6/10

She lies sprawled nude across a plastic sheet. Cut, bruised, but no bones seem broken.
What happened? How? Why? No idea. Then the man with the rifle arrives.
Effective hunter / hunted drama saves its jolt and surprise for the end.
Spanish short makes a good opener for your Horror marathon.

The Invisible Man - 1933 - 7/10

The upside of the experiment renders one invisible.
Slight downside, insanity.
Dr. Griffin, working on “bleaching” fails to realize the compound he uses has been banned.
His deterioration runs from jokes to foul deeds to megalomania.
Pre-Code shocker owes a lot of Claude Rains’ voice.
Witty, devil-may-care, homicidal.
The effects are still impressive. Another early Universal gem.
Note: Surprising how well this worked out, considering its troubled history.

Bon Voyage - 2003 - 6/10

Grab bag of murder, comedy, mystery and wartime occupation.
Viviane has accidentally (?) kills an admirer / threat.
Old boyfriend Frédéric foolishly gets tagged for the death.
While Viviane woos an important minister (Depardieu) for aid.
More? The Germans are overrunning France, while a professor tries to flee with gallons of heavy water.
Movie jumps heedlessly from serious to silly and back.
The film is well shot, with a impressive roster of A-listers, and the narrative actually sustains.

Lucas, Tim - Succubus (Necronomicon)

It is not Franco’s most important film, not his best, not the most accessible.
Nevertheless, it is the transition film, the pivot.
Where he was given carte blanche, meaning a pile of money, to make whatever kind of film he wanted.
Never before, and never again, would Jess Franco be handed so much artistic freedom.
Writer and film historian Lucas takes a deep, deep dive into a singular film.
Comparing and contrasting the two different versions, French and American.
And no, the dubbed version is not the lamentable ripoff.
An experienced soul, steeped in culture, fashioned the US dub.
For fans of this director, this is key to understanding a moment in his career where doors opened.
For those who do not know Jess Franco, or dismiss him as a porn hack, this is not the for you book.
Packed with photos and footnotes, a great addition to one’s cinema library.
γνῶθι σεαυτόν

Institute Benjamenta, Or This Dream People Call Human Life - 1995 - 6/10

Jakob arrives at the school that trains servants (household or civil, unstated).
There, aspirations and self-respect are stripped. One will become nothing.
Although the female head, Lisa, and Jakob seem to be attracted, little is done.
Rather, there is rising tension that never truly resolves.
Stark black and white is highly Expressionistic, and experimental.
In other hands, this might become a Gothic nightmare.
Here, events are like a hazy dream, watered-down Kafka.
I fell asleep twice and had to rewind.
The film has countless admirers, so I was justly curious … and disappointed.

Black Bag - 2025 - 7/10

A colleague confirms George’s suspicion.
There is a traitor in the house, someone who’s gotten hold of something dangerous.
The list is a narrow five, one being George’s wife. Kathryn.
Exceptional espionage thriller, more of a chess match than stunts and explosives.
Think [U]Ipcress File[/U] rather than modern [U]Mission Impossibles[/U].
One watches master game players at work, not omni-talented heroes.
Fassbender and Blanchett work well as the secretive couple, but the entire cast is outstanding.
One of the best Soderbergh films I’ve viewed in a decade.

Cliffhanger - 1993 - 7/10

Retired mountain ranger is asked to rescue a clutch of lost hikers.
Turns out, they are murderous thieves who have hijacked a cool $100 M.
Innocent survivors? None. Which our rescue team soon realize, foretelling their own fate.
One of the great action films of the 90’s before CGI replaced stunts, before heroes wore pajamas.
A crew of formidable villains, breathtaking scenery.
Probably my favorite movie by Stallone, and yes I know about the others.

She Beast - 1966 - 5/10
AKA - Revenge Of The Blood Beast

“It looks like that bed could collapse at any moment.”
“Let’s risk it,” she laughs.
What could be more romantic? On your honeymoon, when your car breaks down in Transylvania.
Where your bride is body switched with a 300 year old, hideous witch.
The premise is sure enough, but the comedy dominates.
Moreover, it is silly bordering on stupid.
Looking for Barbara Steele? Hurry. Her scenes are few.

You Never Know Women - 1926 - 6/10

Vera is rescued at a construction site by a rich swell.
Each is smitten. She with his gallantry. He? Well, Vera is a peach.
She is also the star of a Russian circus, from where he attempts to lure her away.
Money, furs and easy comforts. Who cares about friends, family, colleagues, work?
A triangle develops, although Vera is unaware of partner Norodin’s feelings toward her,
Norodin’s act resembles Houdini’s water torture, by the way.
Nice little drama with impressive illusions.

DeLuca, Sandy - Reign Of Blood

Darcy and boyfriend Bobby travel the lonesome highways and backroads.
Killing for kicks, for profit, because they simply like the smell of blood.
While there are references throughout to Bonnie & Clyde, they are not famous bank robbers.
They are low rent white trash, their robberies are small change and petty.
Rather than Bonnie & Clyde, the template for this pair seems Mickey & Mallory, without the charisma.
Indeed, our villains come off as cardboard wannabees.
My suspicion is author DeLuca had a theme and an ending, while the midsection muddled around.
I appreciate that Darcy is our narrator, hence this is from a female point of view.
Killings are detailed, but not in the gore strewn, mouth watering detail a male writer might lavish.
Likewise, the few sex scenes, where a male might describe female bodies in wondrous raptures.
Well written, although I was never engaged, let alone engrossed.

The Secret War Of Harry Frigg - 1968 - 5/10

Spotty comedy of lowly private assigned to impersonate a general, and get himself captured by Italian forces.
Objective? Free several real generals held prisoner in a posh villa.
Once there, he relishes the luxury, as well as the lovely countess.
Why Paul Newman chose this turkey is beyond me.
He seems stiff and ill at ease throughout.
One would find better comedy watching Hogan’s Heroes reruns.

Succubus - 1968 - 6/10
AKA - Necronomicon Geträumte Sünden

Male and female are chained to crosses, while a knife wielding woman carves their flesh.
Hold on, it’s only a decadent cabaret show for jaded sophisticates.
“Tormentor” Lorna is a creature of the borderlands, however.
Apparently slipstreaming various incarnations of herself.
Much of this might resemble six scenes in search of a narrative.
Nevertheless, this is one of Jess Franco’s earliest dream fugues.
(The Acid Party surely inspired David Lynch.)
Perhaps better viewed after seeing a dozen other Franco films beforehand.
The US dub (Terry Vantell) smooths some elements, obscures others.
English subtitles = https://sub-scene.com/subscene/71969 (US Dub)

Samuels, Mark - Black Altars

Slim collection that Mark would only grudgingly allow to be reprinted. Some feel like youthful works, but he needn’t have worried over that. They are all good.

Visionaries, mystics and an astronomer fill the gentleman’s narration in “The Lichen”. Kropeki, the mystic, is of the most unfortunate kind, foretelling doom and gloom that are, worse, contagious.

Glanville Home, an imposing brick structure where the well-heeled and well-off sojourn to recover from whatever maladies, real or imagined, trouble them. The sort of establishment our investigative journalist – shall we call him “Patient 704” – ought never to step foot inside.

The night wanderer, the solitary insomniac, who shares dark alleyways and waysides with, what else, cats. A league of felines all paying fealty to “The Ailuromorph”. One of those eerie homages to Bast that HPL would have applauded.

Mentioning Lovecraft, the closing story “Dedicated To The Weird” also bear the fingerprints of the Providence scribe. Through a series of letters to Beatrice, Henri notates the isolated hamlet where he has holed up, writing furiously. The village is odious, the inhabitants corruptions of humanity. Henri senses he cannot tarry overlong. Nonetheless, loathsome town fuels his imagination.

An inducement for those wavering: Two sources (QC & JP) confirmed that Mark revised two stories. The last one only somewhat, but the first one extensively. Rest easy, friend of Machen.