Vultural

X - 2022 - 6/10

1979, indie film producers opt to shoot their porno in rural Texas.
The crew rents a home from a frail, elderly couple and begin filming.
The porn “plot” is typical of the era: a disabled motorist encountering horny farmer’s daughters.
Throughout this slow burner, a fragrance of sultry dread builds.
Of which the crew seems unaware, until the tension boils over.

The homework for this is excellent. The TV preacher looks like Brother Lester Roloff.
Lone Star beer, blue eyeshadow, mini-skirts, tube tops.
One of the players, Mia, seems a cousin to another naughty innocent, Desireé Cousteau.
Unsettling to many viewers is likely the unpleasant contrast between youth and decrepitude.
Ripe and its inevitable rot into decay. No one envisions being grandpa after a few turns.

Rabbit Test - 1978 - 4/10

After a quickie, one night stand (actually on his back, atop a pinball machine) Lionel finds himself pregnant.
Comic implications ensue, especially after female shy Lionel meets a nice girl.
Written and directed by Joan Rivers (her lone directorial effort).
The premise has possibilities, and the cast is loaded with cameos of once-popular faces.
Biggest problem is there simply aren’t enough jokes, or flat out don’t land, or are beyond tasteless.
A brilliant comedian, Rivers would have been able to read a room and adjust.
Not here. Belly flop of a misfire.

Eddie The Eagle - 2016 - 6/10

Feel good biopic of unlikely celebrity of the ‘88 Calgary Winter Olympics.
Eddie Edwards has Olympic dreams, despite being far-sighted, ignored by teammates and country, and possessing limited funds.
He just wants to compete! And the Olympics are - supposedly - a celebration of amateur sport.
“Ski jumping," he decides. “Yeah, I can do that!"
Passable entertainment, the equivalent of sponge cake.

Alone - 2020 - 7/10

Still grieving, Jessica loads the U-Haul and embarks on the four day trip to relocate.
The route takes her off the main highways, and onto two lane roads in the Pacific Northwest.
Where, after awhile, she notices the same vehicle, same driver, following her.

“Hey, I’m sorry, there was a misunderstanding back there where I almost ran you off the road.”
Even female intuition wailing full bore doesn’t always measure up against a determined predator.
Outstanding example of how to craft a tense thriller on a budget.
Both leads are superb. Jessica shows more common sense than hundreds of movie screamers.
While Sam, a sketch of friendly, soft spoken mendacity, is the typical “ordinary guy.”

Blow Out - 1981 - 6/10

Travolta stars as a movie sound designer who accidentally records what seems to be a killing.
As he slowly understands what he has gotten himself into, professional silencers circle.
Travolta is very good, Lithgow as a villain is terrifying.
If you enjoyed Blow-Up (1966), this DePalma vehicle is a decent clone.
More visceral, definitely, also with more suspense, though Antonioni’s film left the viewer with a haunting unease and sense of foreboding, that this does not.

The Wolfpack - 2015 - 5/10

Exasperating documentary that offers more unanswered questions than insight.
Story of seven sheltered children growing up in lower east side New York.
Sheltered, as having over-protective parents (dad) in the extreme.
The kids were never allowed to leave the apartment or interact with dangerous New Yorkers.
What social skills they learned were from television and DVDs.
In the doc, they act out scenes from Reservoir Dogs and Pulp Fiction.
Straight off, seven kids, two parents, New York apartment - how can they afford rent?
Especially since the Peru born father never got a green card and never found work.
The boys speculate they own 5000 VHS and DVDs. How were those purchased?
There is a daughter, not shown. The boys confide they heard dad slap their mom.
Was there abuse going on? What sort?
Where was Child Protective Services?
One of the boys (I had trouble separating) mentioned Mom was paid for home schooling them.
Huh? New York pays home schooling parents? Enough for rent, utilities, food, clothes, etc … ?
Plus, how did they pay for doctor visits, the dentist?
The family story is odd to the point of bizarre, yet the storytelling is a rambling, incoherent jumble.
Much is unsaid, much may be invented.
Be wary when watching this one.

I, The Executioner - 1968 - 7/10
AKA - Minagoroshi no Reika // みな殺しの霊歌 / Requiem For A Massacre

The first murder was vicious.
The victim stripped, bound, gagged. Forced to write the names of the others.
By the second death, police suspected a serial killer.
Three other women meet. From fearful to dismissive. One wonders if deaths had to do with “that day”.
So do we. Yet the mystery of what and why is doled out in stages.
Camerawork is inspired throughout, from low ground angles to extreme closeups.
Makoto Satô is an intense, remorseless, deliverer of vengeance.
Gripping thriller, though the denouement … I dunno.

The Making Of A Legend: Gone With The Wind - 1988 - 8/10

Gone With The Wind, I have screened three distinct times. 1969, 1979, 1989.
The 30th anniversary, the 40th. and the 50th. Each time in a full-sized theater.
Even though I own a copy on Laserdisc (sealed) and DVD (sealed), I never felt right watching on TV.
The documentary on the making GWTW, however, I have viewed a dozen times.
Truly outstanding. Acquiring the rights, finding a Scarlett, director burnout, music issues, endless editing.
For movie buffs, this is spellbinding. For creative aspirants, this shows how difficult the process was for Selznick.
Absolutely irresistible.

The Undead - 1957 - 4/10

Roger Corman cheapie filmed inside an empty supermarket.
De-listed scientist, after having traveled in Nepal, hires a hooker (named Diana Love) to help with research.
No, not that kind of research. Hypnosis / regression into past lives.
Anyway, Miss Love drifts back to the Middle Ages and recalls she is imprisoned and scheduled for a beheading.
The “witch” accusation carries a heavy punishment.
Her “modern” soul gives her alter-ego escape advice, which results in altering the time line!
One of the best reasons to watch this flick is for “real witch” (sexy Allison Hayes) with her imp (Billy Barty).

If you didn’t get enough of Ms Hayes in Attack Of The 50 Foot Woman this has more bodacious goodies.
Acting in the modern sequences is wooden, lines poorly delivered.
Problems are less noticeable in the medieval era because everyone speaks a Shakespearean hybrid dialect.
Atmospheric score. Cheap, though OK special effects (don’t expect too much).
Mr Satan is a laissez faire bon vivant, and a cheerful pragmatic.

The Manor House Of Fear - 1927 - 6/10
AKA - Le Manoir de la Peur

The ruined manor lies behind the cemetery, and is said to be haunted.
So when the brooding stranger arrives, restores it, then moves in, the villagers know the Devil has come.
Silent film is high Gothic and crime. Superstition and thwarted love.
Pacing is brisk and the photography, especially night scenes, are extraordinary for their time.
The soundtrack was an electronic score of noise and blips, which I finally turned off.
Video elements were pretty good. Translated French inter-titles into English were by me.
Subs = https://subscene.com/subtitles/the-manor-house-of-fear/english/2800554

Fortune Teller - 2020 - 6/10

Tense horror short of the paper fortune teller.
You know, that innocent childhood playtoy?
Always unwise to peer into the future, I say.
Nevertheless, people never learn.
Subs = https://subscene.com/subtitles/the-fortune-teller/english/2798193

The Final Girls - 2015 - 7/10

Intelligent, funny, loving tribute to slasher films of the 80’s.
From opening “Camp Bloodbath” trailer, to synth music, tunes by Kim Carnes and Warrant, to key ingredients of masked psychopath, keen edged weapon, horny teenagers, empty campground, this film scores again and again.
Tone jumps from howlingly funny to bittersweet, often in a heartbeat.
The mother-daughter element, which breaks formula rules, is very potent.
What is so enjoyable is the script is whip-smart, ironic and reverent.
You can tell the creators have a true fondness for the genre.

DO NOT VIEW THE TRAILER!! It reveals the whole story and many of the surprise jokes.

Black Tight Killers - 1966 - 7/10
AKA - Ore ni Sawaru to Abunaize / 俺にさわると危ないぜ

Passenger invites the stewardess out to dinner.
While dining, she notices a man spying on them from the shadows.
Her date (the airline passenger), a war photographer, chases after the shadowy man.
Only to see him murdered in the alley by three women wearing leather jackets and black tights.
Meanwhile, the stewardess is kidnapped by the yakuza.
This is the first five minutes! The photographer is soon pursued by police, yakuza, American mobsters, and the lethal lovelies, the black tight killers.
The story - with a half dozen plots - explodes at breakneck speed.
Groovy music, wildly inventive camera work, and fountains of color.

One scene: Our hero, an often thickheaded sort, get rescued frequently.
A sportscar driving hottie bails him out then asks if she can spend the night,
“Because I spent all day playing golf and it’s too late to face my parents.”
Yes, he buys that excuse.
Once at his place, in bed, she’s cold. “Could you bring a blanket? And yourself?”
Naturally he takes advantage of the situation only to begin screaming in pain.
“Ninja trick,” she purrs, “octopus pot. Now talk.”
“You’re one of them! Oww!! You’re one of the black tight killers!”
“Talk. Or I tighten the octopus pot … like this. Tighten more and you die.”
Of course he talks. He shouts.
Just one of dozens of wild scenes in crazed spoof of action movies.

Ferry Cross The Mersey - 1964 - 6/10

Overlooked jewel that came out during the British Invasion, but was NOT released in the States.
Gerry Marsden and mates are art students by day, musicians at night.
A fellow student, and very posh bird, takes interest and finds the lads a manager.
Now, if they could only nail the upcoming Merseybeat competition.
Film is shot in and around Liverpool, including the ferry.
Plot is innocuous, though seldom dull.
This is packed, packed, with musical numbers. The Pacemakers’ finale seems to have been filmed very close to an extraordinarily hot crowd. There is a real sense of frantic energy.
While not at the level of A Hard Day’s Night, it is superior to Catch Us If You Can.
One number was filmed inside the Cavern Club.
Fellow performers seen during the film include Cilla Black, The Fourmost, The Black Knights, Earl Royce And The Olympics, The Blackwells.

Faneditors, take note!

Be Kind, Rewind - 2008 - 7/10

Video store memories.
Two pezheads accidentally erase the tapes.
With fools’ inspiration, they opt to reshoot films using themselves and locals.

The results, at the very least, are atrocious. Yet in the so bad, they are funny category.
This film beams innocence. A lessor narrative would be snarky or smugly ironic.
The charm of characters and stories shines though.
Aspiring faneditors, get your sweded fix here.

Manhattan Murder Mystery - 1993 - 7/10

Allen and Keaton play a long married couple.
After a neighbor dies, Keaton grows suspicious that the widower does not grieve enough.
Perhaps even, he killed his wife!
Allen tries to inject reason into her thoughts, but she is headstrong.
And, as I have often discovered, never dismiss female intuition.
Delicate balance of comedy, mystery, and fondness for old cinema and OTR.
For the curious, this is a “good” Allen vehicle.

Theatreland - 2009 - 7/10

Behind the scenes series examines upcoming performances at Theatre Royal Haymarket.
Even before opening, the first play is sold out, “Waiting For Godot” with Ian McKellen and Patrick Stewart.
Backstage means observing the grips, ushers, managers, designers.
From repairs to excited brushes with the famous.
Alert! The complete “Waiting For Godot” is NOT included.
Overlong by two episodes, the final episodes show the hectic mounting of the next production, “Breakfast At Tiffany’s.”
One gets the sense the latter has a rocky future.

High-Rise - 2015 - 5/10

After equipment malfunctions and breakdowns, residents of an exclusive apartment tower break into class tribalism.
From the onset, there seem to be glitches and warning signs, yet tenants flood in.
Based on a J G Ballard novel, the setting is symbolic of Thatcher Britain or Reagan America.
Everyone out for themselves.
With few exceptions, characters are cold, bored, self-absorbed, or disengaged.
The more affluent or status-worthy reside in upper floors, lower orders near street level.
This is a major flaw. In all exclusive communities, low rents are not tolerated.
The descent into dystopia is abrupt. When violence mounts, no one phones police, no one flees.
Heavy handed allegory with paper thin characters.

Happening - 2021 - 7/10
AKA - L’événement

Anna discovers she is pregnant, all but a death blow to her ambition to be a teacher.
She asks around, tying to find a solution, but this is 1963 and no one will help her.
Abortion in France was illegal, those who even gave advice could be sent to prison.
As is ever the case, the sperm provider bears no responsibility.
Weeks glide by, while at school her grades worsen.
Wrenching drama will resonate with some.

Orange - 2015 - 6/10
AKA - Orenji // オレンジ

Adolescent fairy tale, told to maximize emotional impact.
Walking to school, Naho finds in her purse a letter from her future self.
Ten years older, suffering regrets.
Her letter tells her things that are going to happen, things she must try to prevent.
Inside the classroom, the new transfer student is introduced, and as the letter predicts, events begin to unroll.
A story of desperately trying to avoid Fate, or to swerve the path, and the ramifications.
School is idealized, with little drama and resentment.
The concept of a clutch of honest friends supporting each other is rare, though I did witness such on occasion.

High Tension - 2003 - 5/10
AKA - Haute Tension

Slasher film of two females who visit one of their parents in remote farmland France.
Access is through dirt road and seemingly endless cornfield.
They arrive late at night, say hello, then everyone goes to sleep.
No one hears the rusted work van arrive, nor hear the heavyset man approach the house.
The intruder’s motivations are vague, though a reason teases out midway.
Film suffers structural problems as it is carnage heavy in the beginning, then plods for forty minutes.
There is an unexpected and terrific “turn” near the end.
Unfortunately, I started applying logic at that point and the whole film collapsed for me.

Yummy - 2019 - 6/10

Alison has found a budget hospital for her procedure.
In a decision that will horrify the casual fratboy, she opts for breast reduction, from F to B.
She fails to consider, when you go budget, you get what you pay for.

“You think, maybe, we can get out of here?”
Medical experiments gone awry soon lead to corridors packed with ravening corpses.
The kind that chomp down and spread the infection.
Splatter horror, spliced with twisted, laugh out loud moments.

The Nest Of The Cuckoo Birds - 1965 - 5/10

Agent Johnson is assigned to infiltrate a vicious gang in the Everglades.
So much for that. Next scene, he is fleeing for his precious life.
Hounds, criminals and shotguns in hot pursuit, Johnson weaves through alligators and cottonmouths, before finding refuge at the Cuckoo Bird Inn.

The owner, Mrs. Pratt, is an ex-showgirl and a crazed religious zealot. Handyman Alfred wants Johnson outta there.
Then there’s an insane daughter, locked upstairs and chained to the floor.
Oh yeah, and a wandering female, stark naked, except for a face mask and big ole knife.
Acting is over the top, though one grows accustomed to it, as well as the banal dialogue.
If you make it midway, hang around for the chapel of mannequins.

Stunningly restoration by Nicolas Winding Refn is the one to catch.
Subs = https://subscene.com/subtitles/the-nest-of-the-cuckoo-birds/english/2793980

Ingrid Bergman: In Her Own Words - 2015 - 7/10
AKA - Jag är Ingrid

Less a documentary about the movie career, but more a behind the doors personal look.
For a Bergman fan, there is wonderful material here. Old photos, home movies taken by her father, as well as Ingrid herself who was quite the home movie buff. A trove of correspondence with lifelong Swedish friends. Recollections from her four children.
What emerges, however, is the story of a loner and perhaps a lonely soul.
Bergman moves from Sweden to Hollywood to Italy to England. In two moves, she leaves her children behind.
Always, though, she takes her bulging collection of photos, letters and home movies.
One wonders if, for the woman orphaned early, those physical memories were more important than anything else.

Graves, Clotilde - A Vanished Hand

Melissa Edmundson has done a stellar job here, gathering Clotilde Graves’ supernatural tales into a choice collection. Indeed, this could easily fit into Richard Dalby’s “Mistresses Of The Macabre” series.
A diverse assortment, with little thematic repetition.
“How The Mistress Came Home” catches the young bride, arriving to the great house ahead of the carriage, throwing the staff into consternation. Funny, sad, funny again.
“A Spirit Elopement” is more cautionary, about summoned spectres who then tend to stick around. Warning, you mess with the unknown, chances are unknown consequences await.
Pining for your lost love, or lover? After the death of his love, Daymond never dated, never married. He remained steadfast to his memory. Yet in “A Vanished Hand” the ghost unexpectedly returns, with no understanding of time. Worse, Daymond’s recollections appear to be skewed.
“The Compleat Housewife” finds another new bride taking possession of the manor, and the fabled recipe book. The book, though, belongs to the unquiet ghost of the estate, who takes a surprising shine to the young girl, helping her with a legendary banquet. By turns funny, before darkening.
Straight up adventure follows in “The Mother Of Turquoise.” Men, camels and equipment journey deep into the desert, searching for the precious lode. Haggard on a small scale, rousing stuff.
Love makes promises, true love most of all. “Dark Dawn” charts one such declaration from Corporal Cane to his beloved Temperance, before he marches off to war.
Edmundson provides an illuminating introduction. And! there are two profiles at the end, with one being an observation of Graves’ alter ego, Richard Dehan.