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Lots of spam from ishaj in OFF TOPIC Media.
Lots of spam from ishaj in OFF TOPIC Media.
The Girl Cut In Two - 2007 - 6/10
AKA - La Fille Coupée en Deux

Girl in question is local weathergirl chased by an aged roué and a young wastrel.
In the best ménage à trois traditions, the female attempts to navigate both males.
The provincial town is rather small, however.
The older man, a writer, frequents a sybaritic den with other dissolutes.
The younger man is spoiled, insecure, prone to violence.
Talky (as expected), laced with bedroom politics and petty rivalries.
Note - I braced myself for another French talk-o-drama.
During opening credits, I announced aloud,
“Look, Mathilda May!”
“Who’s that?” asked one of the girls.
“Brilliant thespian,” I said. “She starred in the classic Lifeforce.”
“Oh? Any good?”
“Unforgettable.”
Lipstick - 1976 - 6/10

I remember watching this when it came out, disappointed that it was glossy exploitation.
Why rewatch decades later? IQ of Cheez Whiz, I suppose.
Fashion model catches the eye of her young sister’s music teacher.
Relationship quickly plunges down, “I thought her no meant yes,” territory.
Meaning forced sex and subsequent drama.
Then, as now, it can be maddeningly difficult for females to receive a fair judgment.
Ending(s) remain a one-two hop of implausible contrivances for me.
Breakout role, hoped for by Margaux Hemingway, boosted younger sister Mariel instead.
A Wicked Woman - 1958 - 6/10
AKA - Dokufu Takahashi Oden / Poisonous Woman / 高橋 お伝

Busy account of very lively girl, Oden.
After shoplifting a jewelry store, she is “apprehended” by a young policeman.
She begs him to let her rest at her home before going to the station.
At home, she enfolds him with the sticky petals and seduces him.
An official perceives her character and forces her into becoming both mistress and procurer for his slave trade.
Oh yes, she also has two husbands tucked away.
All in the first 30 minutes! Long takes make film feel slow at times, though.
Based - believe it or not - on a true individual.
The Best Intentions - 1992 - 7/10
AKA - Den Goda Viljan

Bergman’s story about his parents, written a decade after a premature retirement.
(Turns out he had more fuel in the tank.)
A young seminary pupil falls in love with the rich daughter.
Marriage, and then he is assigned to a parish in northern oblivion.
Gorgeous looking film, cautionary in several ways.
Set in 1909, the romantic idealism of one character and the humorless discipline of the other may not resonate with many (though I know at least three couples in precisely this relationship).
The Big Hit - 2020 - 7/10
AKA - Un Triomphe

They’re not exactly the ordinary troupe of actors.
Murderers, armed robbers, drug dealers.
Nevertheless, one works with the talent at hand.
Including convicts inside the penitentiary.
Then the director, the outsider, decides they can handle a real play.
Something along the lines of, say, “Waiting For Godot.”
Patience, frustration, deprivations, and the absurdness of life.
Sharp edged comedy with enough teeth to offset happy-days pandering.
Lavalantula - 2015 - 4/10

Another gas vent that puts the mindless into entertainment.
This is a blatant riff or rip of the Sharknado franchise, even down to a “Finn" cameo.
Volcanoes erupt in Los Angeles and sheep-sized tarantulas scurry out.
These bugs attack and belch fire. Roasted human is tastier, one gathers.
Story is of a family trying to rescue scattered members.
The same template used in every single Sharknado sequel.
Derivative, mindlessly amusing, amateurish special effects - apparently intentional.
Lowest common denominator expectations apply as hipsters make crap for dumb customers.
Mind you, I did go “Whee!” when I found this.
Beware, there is a sequel.
Various (Editor: Beech, Mark) - Bitter Distillations
Assorted decoctions, vile cordials, the sweet aperitif before the hand clutches for the throat.
“The Blissful Tinctures,” by Jonathan Wood, opens in a trench in the Great War. Patrick serves King and Country, nudged to enlist, it appears, by his parents, whose decadent habits flower in his absence.
Arguments and snide barbs are exchanged between the upper trays and the self-effacing lot. Between the crustless cucumber sandwiches, the perfectly crafted canapés, the expensive cold cuts, and the neglected fruits. Of course, there are stray human types in Rose Biggins’ “The Tartest Flavours,” but who would be interested in that lot? I mean, really!
They resembled angels. They possessed wings, though their bodies were supple and naked, unlike messengers of the Divine. The pair tended the garden, as well as the bees. Marla refers to them as “The Poison Girls.” Marla even accepts the jar of honey they leave her.
It was an open air museum, out in rural Tennessee. Actually it was closer to an homage, or open air art installation. (Think Himley Hall model village or Gwynedd, North Wales). Castoff bits and shards, repurposed, fashioned into a peaceful environment. Alas, “The Jeweled Necropolis” slowly boils to an intoxicating aroma, only to dissipate unexpectantly. I wonder if the writer is holding back for a novel?
The same cessation in “The Garden Of Dr. Montorio.” Characters grow, a mystery deepens, suspense tightens – then – quitting time. At least, a secondary character has the good grace to echo the reader’s frustration. Still, come on!
More satisfying, “Not To Be Taken,” by Kathleen Jennings, surveys the collector. Two collectors, actually. One hoards vintage poison bottles, vials, ampules, as well as the lethal contents. The other collects a more dangerous game. This is a dark remembrance of predators and potions, and how important it can be to make friends with the neighbors.
The Kiss Of Death - 1973 - 6/10
AKA - Du Nu // 毒女

After hours, a young mill worker is attacked and gang banged by five rogues.
Worse, at least one of them transmitted the deadly Vietnam Rose venereal disease.
She quits the textile mill, begins hostessing at a noisy club run by – whoa – Lo Lieh.
Who, in no time flat, teaches her kung fu, whereupon she starts hunting her assaulters.
Sleazy Cat III exploitation from the Shaw Brothers has good moments and oddball diversions.
For example, during club sequences I heard borrowed riffs “25 or 6 to 4” (Chicago) as well as “The Red And The Black” (Blue Öyster Cult). Distracting enough that I kept going, “What is this? I know this.”
Scream And Scream Again - 1970 - 6/10
Man jogging in busy downtown London collapses from an obvious heart attack.
When he wakes up, he’s missing a leg!
Later on, he wakes up with another missing leg!

OK, this film is about harvesting.
No, no, no. Next scene is in a fascist military regime. Spies and conspiracies.

Quick shift back to London where police are chasing after a brutal killer who’s targeting women.
Couple other threads stack this entertaining, if bewildering, horror thriller.
Vincent Price, Christopher Lee and Peter Cushing (don’t blink) headline a strong cast.
There is way too much going on. Defenders say filmmakers decided viewers were smart enough to connect the storylines. It seems a pieced together job, nonetheless.
The pace is rarely dull, there is nudity, chases, bloody killings, and enough plot jumps to keep your head spinning.
Not a great horror film by a longshot, but contains memorable scenes.
The jogger/patient is eerily unsettling.
To My Great Chagrin: The Unbelievable Story of Brother Theodore - 2007 - 7/10

“As long as there is death, there is hope.”
Stand up comedian, performance artist, revival preacher, ruined aristocrat, prophet, madman.
Theodore Gottlieb – Brother Theodore.
“It’s best not to be born at all.”
A biography told in fragments, disjointed, with unnamed voiceovers (MAJOR omission there).
Part documentary, part experimental theatre, part puppet play.
“We are all puppets in the hands of an insane puppeteer.”
Flawed, as this seems to spotlight the aesthete of the man, and not the man himself.
Arguably the last Weimar entertainer, and brother in arms with Emil Cioran.
“What this country needs is a dictator. I feel the time is right, and the place congenial. I will be strict but just. Heads will roll, and corpses will swing from every lamppost… Evil that succeeds is good. The coup is well in preparation.”
Internet’s Own Boy - 2014 - 7/10

Poignant documentary of Aaron Swartz, prodigy and Internet activist.
Swartz was part of the team who developed RSS web feed code (he was 14 at the time) and was instrumental in developing CC (creative commons copyright).
He landed in prosectorial crosshairs after uploading public information and knowledge that private corporations were charging for.
Perhaps his shining moment was rousing public opinion against the SOPA bill which was considered a done-deal.
Everyone who uses the Internet is indebted to him.
Film very good about showing what Swartz did, and one got a good feel for his personality.
Narrative brutally honest about Federal agents intimidating and coercing Swartz’s friends during interrogations.
No punches pulled when showing overzealous prosecutor, as well as dubious souls who have never been prosecuted (big bankers, a couple of familiar software guys), but stops short of highlighting MIT involvement and lack of intervention. Swartz might well be alive today had MIT acted better.
Very well done. Inspiring. Sad.
Curse Of The Crimson Altar - 1968 - 5/10
After his brother goes missing, Robert sets off in search of him, and answers.
This takes him back to the family beginnings, and during the annual witch burning reenactments.
Robert, in a word, is a dunce, but he plugs along.
Superb sets, groovy 60’s goings on, and an unbeatable cast.
What could go wrong?

Well, the plot is inept. Worse, Robert the antique dealer, proves an utter boor.
He lacks social graces, his intelligence is lower than a fallen palm tree, and he imposes.
So much promise here, ruined by an extremely poor script.
The Bandit - 1946 - 6/10
AKA - Il Bandito

Ernesto, returning home at the end of World War II finds his home of Torino in ruins.
His mother is dead, sister missing. Jobs are scarce, and housing … good luck.
First act of is a grim Noir, subgenre Rubble Noir.
The narrative swerves into glossy, nightclub gangster mode, barely delving into that world.
Final act shifts back into Noir, with a fatalistic, if puzzling conclusion
Amedeo Nazzari, as Ernesto, could have played Errol Flynn in a biopic (though Flynn was very much alive and active at this time).
Black Belt Jones - 1974 - 6/10

Lightweight (white-weight) Blaxploitation film.
Mafia gets winds of a future downtown development (back in the day, the term was Urban Renewal).
Mob buys properties, but one hold out is Pop’s Karate School.
The Feds have been after the mob for some time, and their finest agent, a buffed Jim Kelly, also happens to be the preeminent alumni of the school. How Kelly fit into his way-cool Jensen is beyond me,
Most of the fight sequences are well done. Kelly was a martial arts expert.
Too many juvenile scenes for my liking, though, as well as too much comedy.
This is not Black cinema with attitude, but feels aimed at the broader audience.
Grant, Charles L - The Dark Cry Of The Moon
Part of a trilogy of horrors visiting Grant’s favorite locale, Oxrun Station.
In this outing, wolves descend. Or rather, wolf. The breed that lopes about under the full moon.
With Grant, deaths are invariably offstage and understated. Ditto erotic gropings.
(The clutch of Splatter Kids had arrived at this time [Ketchum, Skipp, Laymon, Schow, et al] and Grant was considered old-fashioned.)
Characters fall into potential monsters, likely victims, heroes and wannabees.
Professionally done, elements feel formulaic.
The narrative races along making this a quick read.
Transgressor - 2022 - 6/10
Visiting a psychiatrist, a young man shares his troubled dreams.
Of when he had once, ages earlier, been Pharaoh.
And not a particularly pleasant Pharaoh, either.

Effective use of minimal sets, flashbacks, and strong voices.
Well done short, more supernatural than horror, of long simmering patience.
Subs = https://www.mediafire.com/file/artlbse6pa0tjmr/Transgressor_-_2021.srt
Fatherland - 1986 - 6/10
AKA - Singing The Blues In Red

1985, protest singer Klaus is being nudged out of East Germany.
True, he is offered choices: prison, recant, or the exit door.
Once in the West, music execs are quick to offer a recording deal.
He is a hot property, and the industry wants to take advantage while he remains hot.
Klaus is no innocent, however, and resists being treated as a commodity.
There is a subplot of Klaus’s father, a fellow musician, who defected a generation earlier.
Dialogue about and with the father is muffled or mumbled, leaving me unsure there.
Despite that, this is a film of outsiders / observers, who understand that whatever the ism (Communism, Capitalism, Nazism) they, and by extension us, will be exploited.
All About Them - 2015 - 6/10
AKA - À Trois on y Va

Ménage à trois of provincial Millenniels.
Successful professional drops in on “friend,” discovering she now has a boyfriend.
No biggee. As soon as the boyfriend leaves momentarily, the girls kiss and grope each other.
Seems they have “old flame” history to which the male is ignorant.
No biggee there, either. When the boyfriend drives the other woman home, he propositions her.
She doesn’t exactly say no.
For the rest of the movie, the three cheat around on each other and suffer emotionally.
Rather disappointing as this contained all elements for a first rate farce.
Aguirre, The Wrath Of God - 1972 - 8/10
AKA - Aguirre, der Zorn Gottes

Lost patrol of the conquistador, deep in the Peruvian jungle, hunting for fabled gold.
Fabled being an apt word, as the further downstream they journey, the more you realize this is fool’s gold.
There is resistance from Nature, which the patrol fail to prepare for, and from unseen human enemies.
The cinematography is astonishing, especially when you consider the limitations of equipment in the early 1970’s.
Klaus Kinski, as Don Lope Del Aguirre, delivers another career highlight.
Perhaps too slow for today’s staccato tempo, yet fully in keeping with the gradual descent.
Brilliant and inspired, My favorite of all Herzog films.
Cunk On Shakespeare - 2016 - 6/10

You have a date with a theatre fan, and you don’t want to appear an idiot.
What better to do than to view this documentary on William Bartholomew Shakespeare.
Learn about the comedies, the historicals, the Shakespearicals.
The presenter in this, Philomena Cunk, is indeed, fortune’s fool
With perhaps more brains in her elbows than in her head.
Anyway, give this a quick watch beforehand, the better to impress your new squeeze.
The Sniper - 1952 - 6/10

Stray gunman shoots females on lonely San Francisco streets.
He is psychologically damaged, knows he needs help, surrenders to impulses nonetheless.
Reasons are unclear, though he does have a ball-busting female boss (mainly because he is a sorry worker).
Decent Noir, albeit preachy, being a high browed Stanley Kramer production.
Thoughtful use of locations.
If possible, get a version with Eddie Muller’s outstanding commentary.
Muller helms the Film Noir Foundation and is a lifelong San Francisco resident.
He talks at length about actors, locations and the similar (generally snubbed) Without Warning.
Monterey Pop - 1968 - 8/10

For many, this is the peak, the moment the Summer Of Love bloomed.
This concert, especially the extended version, is artifact and testament to that moment.
The Fantasy Fair and Magic Mountain Festival came two weeks before Monterey, but scant little survives.
Monterey featured groups from San Francisco and Los Angeles, from Chicago, New York, England…
Watching, one sometimes catches the heady hope that a better world is at hand.
Sure, Woodstock was more massive and influential, but it came two years later.
It was also profit oriented, less idealistic.
As with most moments, they are precious because they don’t last. Then the memory fades.
This documentary, however, is a glorious reminder (and something of a myth) of three days in 1967.
Book Of Days - 1989 - 7/10

When tearing down a city wall, construction workers open up a view into the past.
The appears to be a medieval French village (though characters speak English).
(Mostly unseen) documentarians wander freely and question individuals.
Shepherds, merchants, a storyteller, the physician, share their lives, allow us to observe.
There is a theatrical element in this Meredith Monk film, but do not be put off by that.
Mesmerizing throughout, even breaking the fourth wall at times.
Highlights include a pageant, and the onset of the plague.
Inquietude - 1998 - 4/10
AKA - Anxiety

Portuguese arthouse film appears crafted to test the stamina of foreign film buffs.
Three sequential tales - extraordinarily slow - of unhappy, over-thinking worriers.
Famous father and son fear they may become forgotten.
Artist is concerned about fate of prostitute (courtesan) he is obsessed with.
Girl fears she cannot marry a boy from another village.
Dialogue is ponderous, fraught with meaning, dense with muddling layers.
Others around me dozed off.
Poster film for people who hate arthouse films.