Vultural

Inserts - 1975 - 5/10

Has-been Silent director, now “reduced” to making pornography.
Those expecting porn will be disappointed, although there is some adult content.
Story is more about the creative process, compounded with real world obstacles.
Richard Dreyfuss and Jessica Harper pretty much dominate proceedings in dialogue driven film.
The “look” of seedy late 1920’s, early 1930’s is fine, and few will notice timeline errors.
Marked as a comedy, this is as funny as herpes, and feels like a theatre play.

Hitler: The Greatest Story NEVER Told - 2013 - 5/10

Lengthy and subversive documentary on Der Führer.
Lengthy, as in 25 episodes, an additional episode of credits, and a bonus episode of life in decadent Berlin before the National Socialists straightened things out.
Over riding theme is Adolf was a genuine good guy who tried to save the world from Bolsheviks.
Initial dozen or so episodes are better crafted, mixing stories that had me heading to my WW II books or Wikipedia: the Haavara Agreement, Bromberg Massacre, Operation Keelhaul, among others.
Other assertions are just plain whoopers. Two examples: Zylkon-B used at Auschwitz was strictly for delousing. Also, equating Berlin defenders with Masada resisting Roman legions.
Latter episodes suffer poor narration, scenes from movies (unattributed), and general meandering.
Subversive, in that at 15“ each, these episodes are easily digested and will be attractive to many.
Bonus episode of decadent Berlin is cobbled directly from Legendary Sin Cities: Berlin - Metropolis Of Vice, without attribution.
IMDB tallies big scores for this revisionist documentary, as well as numerous detailed reviews.
In general, I always urge people to absorb and study as much as they can.
“History is written by victors," (often attributed to Hermann Göring). I realize as I get older history is less and less reliable.

Eisele, Michael - The Girl With The Peacock Harp

A strong assortment, this, that reminds me of classic fairy tales. Grimm, not Anderson. Darkness pervades throughout. For those who worry about the “workshop” style,” Eisele is no formula clone.
“The Beginning” - one not written yet, the true beginning is the music. Purity and soaring inspiration. We open, however, on discord. The couple of opposites, whom time and obligation have riven farther apart. There is a child, as there so often is, over whom the parents feud passionately.
“The Music” cries from the weathered violin, gripped by the dying practitioner. As Fate would have it, the performer is heard. Not when mimicking show tunes for shallow ears, but when he is alone, playing for the muse with abandon.
The captain, no longer a seafaring man, retires to the coast, near the sound of waves and tang of spray. Of savings, alas, he has little. So he accepts an easy job, manning “The Lighthouse.” Beforehand, he had been interviewed, and asked, did he believe in “fancies”. Would you wonder at such a query?
“Monkey,” at 40 pages, is the longest story in this collection. Nadia, after hacking the University database, is assigned probation in the form of community service. Saint Andrew’s Rest Home is hardly what the name indicates, she realizes after one day. While some might recognize patient mistreatment, Nadia concentrates on the patient derisively called Monkey. This tale makes numerous turns, bold and unexpected, and is as satisfying as a carnival ride.
“Rolf” is written in dialect, a technique that exasperates me. I stuck with this, though, and was glad I did. The youthful trainee, gifted yet perhaps over-proud, chisels in the stone masons guild where he catches the eye of the black robed stranger. In any guise, the devil seeks another apprentice.

Who You Think I Am - 2019 - 7/10
AKA - Celle Que Vous Croyez

Claire, fifty, divorced, realizes she has been dumped by her younger boyfriend.
“Boyfriend” is a stretch, as he more of go-to satisfaction.
Doing what guys have done for years, she creates a fake online identity, with a younger age and a random photo.
That said, she is not merely casting for any young male. No, she has a target.
Therein lies the tale in this mystery / psychological drama.
The invisible woman, who conjures a haunting wraith, and for what?
Throughout, she confesses to her psychiatrist, piecemeal explanations that sound hollow.

Whiplash - 2014 - 7/10

In your face character study of aspiring drummer and drill-sergeant, sadistic teacher.
Film has been surprising to many, though hardly to anyone who ever played in high school band or beyond.
That environment has always been extremely competitive, both within the ensemble itself and during contests with other bands.
The student is gifted and ambitious, which the teacher recognizes, but he pushes him harder.
Profanity, obscenity, bullying, physical violence escalate.
Acting over the top, yet totally in keeping with the tone.
Stellar soundtrack.
Basic familiarity with jazz might enhance enjoyment, though it is not necessary.

The Expanse: S01 - 2015 - 7/10

Yeah, there’s a sucker born every minute.
I can’t tell you how many SciFi shows I take a chance on when I know - I know - they are going to blow.
Most are pathetically lame, written by unimaginative hacks, with plots for the lowest common denominator.
Well - this one ain’t! Probably because it is based on a clutch of well written novels.
This, set a couple hundred years in the future, details the conflict and intrigue between Mars and Earth.
Caught in the middle are the “Belters,” denizens of the Asteroid Belt who are treated as grunt labor.
Unlike most SciFi, this is packed with ships and space. Multiple plotlines that converge, yes!
S02 maintains this standard, adds characters and deepens storylines.
S03 is a terrific finale to the first trilogy.
BSG fans, hit this.

Afterthought: I knew, I KNEW, I should have quit after the initial trilogy.
Except I couldn’t help myself.
S04 muddled around inside “The Ring,” and was alright as far as world building.
S05 - S06 reflect conflict and combat. Discouraging and, in a way, depressing.
While set in “the future,” The Expanse shows how infinitesimal humanity’s journey from the cave has been.
We still murder each other, we still kill each other, we drink hate and thirst for revenge.
The Expanse, for all the technological advancement, showcases humankind as remaining primitive.

Secret Of The Blue Room - 1933 - 6/10

Irene turns 21 in the family manor. Her father beside her, three suitors nearby.
Wind howls outside, rain lashes the windows. At the back door, a stranger knocks.
Then the youngest suitor asks to hear the story of the tainted Blue Room.
Where, over the years, three individuals have perished mysteriously.
Tidy, locked room mystery has choice cast and wonderful Universal Gothic sets.
Fairly creaky, and will be familiar if you have watched several “old dark house” mysteries.
Highlights include a chase at the end that goes down, down, down. I should’ve counted steps.

Drive-In Massacre - 1976 - 3/10

Grindhouse slasher that will kill you with boredom.
Couples at the drive-in start getting killed dead by a swordsman.
Piercings, beheadings, general dismemberment.
Killings are speedy and barely shown.
Frisky behavior inside cars is PG, meaning nothing that would disturb a nun.
Though set in California, the acting corps have heavy East coast accents.
Which you will hear plenty of because everyone talks and talks and talks and talks.

Mr. Turner - 2014 - 5/10

Dreary biopic had key viewers hollering foul that Spall missed an Oscar nod as British painter J W Turner.
Really, Spall spent most of the film grunting or guffawing, arguably a spot-on portray of the taciturn artist, but hardly compelling viewing.
Fine outdoor photography undermined by dishwater narrative.
Characters singularly unlikable, and whatever drives them eludes the viewers.
Plot is little more than Turner dabbing oils on canvas, shagging the housekeeper, setting up alternative house, while snorting at relatives, relatives, fellows artists, critics.
A good documentary on Turner would be a recommended alternative.

122 - 2019 - 6/10

Nasr and Umnia don’t have enough money to get married.
Going back on a promise, Nasr decides to do one final “job.”
She insists on accompanying him. It was supposed to be easy.
The accident, however, was unexpected. Umnia survives, Nasr is tagged as dead.

Only, not quite.
Might just as well have been, though.
See, the medical facility does a brisk, cash business in organ harvest.
There are orders for corneas and kidneys, and Nasr has healthy ones!
Derivative, oh yeah. Been done before, sure.
Fast, dark thriller, for nondemanding fans of medical horrors.

Made In Britain - 1982 - 7/10

Scoring this simply for Tim Roth’s ferocious performance.
He plays a high school skinhead, delinquent, spitting ball of hate and fury.
Because he is a juvenile, social agencies are still trying to guide him.
Like he gives a damn.
He knows there is no future for him because of class, wealth, expectations.
Everyone else is overshadowed by a blistering Roth, in this, his first film.

A Study In Terror - 1965 - 6/10

Sherlock Holmes mystery pitting the sleuth against Jack The Ripper.
Production appears like a proto-Hammer version, rich sets, minimally inhabited.
Splash of blood, sexual innuendo but zero nudity.
John Neville makes a crisp Holmes with a touch of irony.
Very young Judi Dench plays mission worker.
Narrative is no great shakes. The famous detective hunts the infamous ripper.
Final denouement confusing, if not outright lame.

Calvary - 2014 - 7/10

During confessional, a penitent confesses to the priest how, as a child, he was abused by a priest.
To feel better, he intends to kill. Not the priest who violated him, he was a bad man. No, the priest right next to him, a good man.
“Be on the beach next Sunday,” he states, “so I can murder you.”
Fatalistic story, laden with moral quandaries. The sanctity of the confession limits what the priest can divulge.
He relates the threat to his monsignor, as well as the local constable, yet not the name of the party.
He is unsure, plus that would be a violation.
Instead, the week eddies past and he advises and counsels parishioners, broken, flawed, or lost.
Community is tight knit and worse than resentful relatives.
Stunning outdoor scenery … especially along the beach.

Shield For Murder - 1954 - 6/10

Nothing personal, you know, it’s just the money.
Another back alley stickup between one who has and one who needs.
The robber doesn’t want witnesses, either, so he empties his gun into the bookie.
Reaches into the warm corpse’s coat, pockets $25K, then shouts for help.
The murderer? A police detective with a string of dead suspects staining his résumé.
Not that such matters. Cops protect their own, even one more crooked than a dog’s hind leg.

Edmund O’Brien fine as the rotten copper, stashing blood loot to - get this - buy a suburban ranch house.
After hours, he is smitten with Patty, a sweet slice of curvy cheesecake who peddles cigarettes in the club.
(Marla English, 20 years younger than O’Brien, the pairing could have been exploited differently.)
The things we do for love, the worse things we do for money.

Le Capital - 2012 - 6/10

Slick financial thriller of high rolling executives.
When the head man of a massive French bank takes ill, he appoints a temporary boss.
His experience is limited and circling sharks eye him as chum.
Worse, a wealthy American hedge fund buys controlling interest in the bank, then sets up traps.
Unlike similar movies - say Big Short, there is no spoon feeding to viewers.
Maneuvering occurs across continents and conference rooms.
Temp Boss proves a cynical calculator, though there is a love angle, stupid beyond belief.
Root for villains because there are no “good guys.”

Gun Woman - 2014 - 5/10
AKA - Nyotaiju Gan Ūman // 女体銃 ガン・ウーマン

Exploitation trash, aimed at the US market, per Los Angeles and desert settings, and a pair of talkative American hired guns.
The redeeming element about exploitation - even trash is often enjoyable and this does have potential.
Basic revenge plot, the baddie is a homicidal whack-job, and the anti-hero (known as “The Mastermind”) is cold, clinical, utterly goal focused.
Most of this is explained and described in lengthy exposition between the hired guns.
One asks questions, the other warbles away. Like a bad infomercial.
The pace is pretty darn slow (ahem, padded), and the limited body count shows signs of budget restrictions.
Gun woman herself might have ten lines of dialogue, though the movie is about her (no, it’s about Mr Mastermind).
Her zero thespian skills are compensated during the final twenty minutes or so, when she performs all her fighting, killing, stabbing, shooting, general bloodlust, stark naked. No foggy lens, strategic plants, digital manipulation.
All Asami, all the way.
For many exploitation hounds, that will boost overall scores.

I Heard It Too - 2014 - 5/10

Mom sings daughter Bethany to sleep.
Before slumber and dreams, comes the rustle, then a voice.
Horror short of home invasion will not be to all tastes.
Might depend on how you enjoy watching a terrified 3 year old.
I didn’t.

If Walls Could Talk: The History Of The Home - 2011 - 6/10

Four part documentary by Lucy Worsley focusing on four rooms in the home.
Living room - Bedroom - Bathroom - Kitchen
Evolution from Medieval time to modern age.
Informative, entertaining, full of catch-phrase origins:
“By hook or by crook” - “Walls have ears” - “Burning the candle at both ends” -

The Killer Is Loose - 1956 - 6/10

Curbside, the getaway sedan purrs like a tiger. The wheelman, eyes and ears on full alert, watches the building. Next to him, the gunman, patient as blight, calmly holds his weapon. At either end of the bank, two confederates nod. And the heist unfolds.
Easy money, folks. No gunfire, no injuries. Yeah, Jack, crime pays.
Except there were a couple of loose comments, which the police, ever perceptive, pick up on. There had been an inside man.

All the makings of a police procedural fly apart after a trigger-happy raid.
An innocent is slain, and the one left grieving vows revenge … and waits.
Decent B-Noir, undercut by domestic melodramatics.
Joseph Cotton and Rhonda Fleming notwithstanding, the reason to watch is Wendell Corey, his character maddened by grief, driven and resourceful in vengeance.
And – Los Angeles, filmed during rainy season, night and day.

The Young Girls Of Rochefort - 1966 - 5/10
AKA - Les Demoiselles de Rochefort

What a disappointing howler.
This was followup to The Umbrellas Of Cherbourg.
Seaside village prepares for the end of summer fete, as the French version of carnival arrives.
Looking for love are Catherine Deneuve and her real life sister Françoise Dorléac (who died tragically young that year).
Also on hand, dancing away, are George Chakiris and Gene Kelly.
Dancing is an understatement, the film is almost nonstop choreography.
Numerous songs by Michel Legrand, none truly memorable.
The movie gets exhausting after awhile. The impression is that everyone tried too hard.

The Lady On A Train - 1945 - 6/10

Silly murder mystery, not without merits, though not, as indicated in IMDB, a Noir in the classic sense.
Deana Durbin’s character sees, or thinks she sees, a murder being committed from her seat on the train.
The police don’t believe her, nor does her favorite mystery writer whom she pesters.
She discovers the identity of the “victim.” A rich gentleman, his death ruled a suicide.
Heirs include Noir heavy Dan Duryea and smiling Ralph Bellamy.
Several other quirky characters fill the plot, as well as false trails, more murders, quick dialogue.
For fans, Ms Durbin sings a couple standards.
Hard boiled seekers, this light hearted fluff ain’t it.

Sarrantonio, Al - Toybox

Collection of what are, ostensibly, children’s horror stories.
Spooky pumpkins, Halloween, the creepy house on the edge of town.
The new kid who doesn’t fit in, the old homeowner of ill odor.
The stories are – in a word – quaint.
Undoubtedly, they reflect Sarrantonio’s childhood in the 1960’s.
While young readers age eight or nine might read these with no ill effects, they would probably regard them as hopelessly corny.
The final half dozen are uglier, a few casually horrific, in keeping with the horror boom of the 1990’s.
Note: Edgar Poe was misspelled Allen. C’mon. Worse, Necco Wafers has two C’s.

Hector And The Search For Happiness - 2014 - 6/10

Simon Pegg as successful psychiatrist who suffers a crisis. Bored, self-doubt, plain old ennui.
Abandons his girlfriend (Rosamund Pike!) to pursue a globe-trotting quest to discover what makes happiness.
Exotic locales, scrapes and escapes, plastic villains, convenient guardian angels.
Feel like I’m shooting BB’s at the balloons of a nine year olds birthday party.
The story was diverting, though hackneyed and lighter than sponge cake.
Essentially a feel good travelogue with dollops of greetings card wisdom.
Breezy … yeah, yeah … saw it, checked off my list, won’t rewatch in this life.

The Thanksgiving Play - 2021 - 6/10

The creator - the director - the historian - the actor.
Not so much theatre as a video conference, brainstorming concepts for a play for nine year olds.
While a few observers might regard the above image and think self-indulgent egoism, the results are funny.
After a soggy opening, this moves swiftly.
The bottom individuals are the funniest or have the best lines.
There are barbs about the holiday, though this is not Woke self-righteousness.
Reeves’ deadpan delivery is sidesplitting at times. An underappreciated comedian.

Murdered By My Fiancé - 2016 - 5/10

Slight doc about murder of author Helen Bailey and her dog!
Boyfriend reports to police four days after she disappears.
Despite Bailey being a best selling author, barely any video of her.
Detectives, analysts, neighbors, and the fiance.
Unexplained - why Fido was killed. Unexplained - relationship.
Why is it “murdered by *my *fiance"? As if the dead author produced this.
Find something else to waste an hour.
Otherwise, example of how not to kill someone.