You sold me with the thumbnail, I’m low-key hyped about what you did with the scene.
JEDIT: Really interesting result, however, the AI voices stick out a lot. Then again, I like how Yoda sounds a lot more like OT Yoda.
Leverkusen is the new Bundesliga champion!
Puh, idk, the single tear on Mustafar already feels extremely heavy-handed, too staged. I’m not a fan of this trope.
it has my interest
it has my interest
But only your divided attention, or so it seems 😄
Nice one
Here’s the line change for the scene with Jango on Kamino. I am not 100% content with the quality as it still sticks out too much for my liking, but I think that it gets the idea across. Obi-Wan learns that there was another Jedi/Sith (Jango probably wouldn’t know the difference) behind the funding of the clones.
https://drive.google.com/file/d/1jnDNUNpFLf3hiiu_3DXfBH7grd-Kas54/view?usp=share_link
That would probably work best, if you’d dub Maul completely. That shouldnt be too much effort due to the little dialogue he has in the original. Additionally, it would free your hand at implementing more radical changes to the plot. For example, there was this idea floating around on this site about changing the motivation of the Naimodians to aquiring the energy technology of the Naboo in order to power a larger droid army.
I don’t think that you need shots like Dooku leaving or so. If it is a dream sequence, then there is some room to ignore small logistical inconsistencies.
Here is another suggestion, prompted by your proof of concept. What if we start the dream with a VO from Obi-Wan prompting Anakin to hurry up, then cut to Obi-Wan being stopped by the shield, followed by Qui-Gon getting stabbed (crop the necessary shots to remove Maul). With this change, we can infer that Anakin feels somehow responsible for Qui-Gon’s death which would naturally fuel his desire for revenge. Furthermore, Obi-Wan might share that feeling on a subconscious level which would explain his harsh treatment of Anakin in AOTC.
I would have to look, but I might still have a background for that scene flying around from the time that I gave Tambor an extra line of dialogue during the war room scene.
Funnily enough, I aimed the line to sell the „clones were originally intended for the separatist“ idea. Had him report that the republic hijacked their deal with the Kaminoans. But anyways, if I‘ve still got the assets, then I would only need a fitting shot of Grievous to fix up a proof of concept for that scene. However, I am currently short on time due to the exam season coming up. But I can send you the background plates, if I find them.
Been looking over Nev & Pan’s questions and ideas for the clone plot in AotC. Wouldn’t the simpler solution be to go with the idea that the clones were originally created for the Separatists, and that the Jedi basically claimed them for their own? Have one of the alien Separatists dialogue say “when will you finalize the Kaminoan deal?” And Dooku will respond with “I am a man of my word.” Then, after Palpatine is given emergency powers, change Yoda’s line to "Visit I will the cloners on Kamino…and barter for their army. If I’m missing any steps, let me know.
That is my preferred alternate version of events. The council seems much less stupid in this scenario, it still cast a mighty shadow on the Jedi for betraying their ideals like that, and it even adds to Dexter‘s line which characterises the Kaminoans as greedy entrepreneurs devoid of any moral commitment.
However, one point that would still need some work to really sell the change, would be Obi-Wan‘s visit on Kamino. The Kaminoans cannot be already working for the republic. Maybe the best way to keep most of the dialogue as is, would be to add a line from Yoda or Windu that explains that Sifo-Dyas was travelling with Dooku before he vanished. And while we‘re at it, maybe change Jango‘s dialogue to: „… a Jedi called Tyrannus…“. This gives Obi enough information to piece together what happened.
I also like your idea to reutilize Dooku‘s line in this context, I hadn’t thought of that. The only real connection point that I had in mind was the scene in Palpatine’s office. (Just make the alien senator say something, heck, maybe he could imply that the Kaminoans approached the republic after Obi-Wan‘s visit to make them look extra slimy)
Here is a wild thought after looking back at the “false-ending” problem of the scene. What if we seriously end the scene after Anakin disarms Obi-Wan? It wouldn’t change anything about the conflicting ideologies of master and apprentice, but it would clean up some of the mud left by Obi-Wan being an extremely sore loser.
I will try and fix up a little mock-up of that idea. But first, I need some throwaway shot of Coruscant to bridge the gap between Obi-Wan’s initial reaction to Anakin’s victory and his high-minded rhetoric at the end of the scene.
Episode 3 flows much better now than the preceding workprint 👍
So far, I have only watched episode 1 with my dad. The only critique, that we have is the very slow second act, but that’s a weakness innate to the first 2 episodes of the series. Maybe you could push some of Cyrils scenes back a little? That would also support his anguish at how complacent everyone around him has become. However, I don’t remember the exact sequence of events, so that might cause some issues.
That’s good to hear
Heyo, how’s movie 3 coming along?
I feel terrible, but I lack the words to describe it and the courage to answer to the person I should talk to.
Today, I rewatched two episodes of the series, and I like the pacing of your cut substantially better than what the 40-minute chunks of the original allow. I am looking forward to your final version of movie 3.
I have seen something like that in a serialized edit of the prequels, that directly cut from the scene in Palpatine’s office to Anakin pursuing Zam on foot.
This might be too much, but you could put flashes of Vader into random scenes like in Fight club.
7!
I don’t know in what direction you want to take this show tonally and if you already have a clear outline in mind, I don’t want to dissuade you from that. But after rewatching Andor (thanks to EddieDean) I feel that you should take Ahsoka in the complete opposite direction and strive toward a much lighter tone, more similar to the cartoons because Ahsoka has neither the performance, the plot, nor the score to sustain itself without becoming comical. So, leaning into the snappy bits of dialogue and the occasional humor (like Ahsoka floating through space) might be the best way to approach the movie.
Overall I liked it. The only changes I would propose are morphing some shots to remove useless reaction scenes. For example, the reaction shot of Sabine during Ahsoka’s line: “Talent is a factor. (pause) But training and focus are what really defines someone’s success.” I think that most of the dialogue flows much better without these irritating breaks. I don’t have this particular clip rendered, but I did a similar edit to the spar when Sabine dismisses Ahsoka’s lesson as a joke and it helps with the scene’s flow and intensity. (Here, at approximately 1:40 https://drive.google.com/file/d/1ErHoanz2vpIC_gFcPBb25eQWRfIoF73O/view?usp=share_link)
Other than that, I would suggest removing the bit with Morgan on the bridge to stay with our heroes for that moment. So instead of:
-sighting of the ring
-Shin contacting Morgan and weapons readying up
-Sabine reporting that the fighters break up
-shot of the shuttle approaching the ring
-The eye of Sion opens fire
I would suggest keeping the mystery about the huge f*cking hyperspace ring a bit longer. So,
-sighting of the ring
-shot of the shuttle approaching
-Sabine reporting that the fighters break up
-Eye of Sion readying the turbo lasers and opening fire
Furthermore, I was a little upset that you cut Huyang’s sassy “closer please.”
Oh, and before I forget it, I feel like you could try changing the close-up shots of Sabine steering the ship through Seatos’ atmosphere. During the first close-up, the extreme 180-degree turn on the lever feels more befitting of the daring dive between the Purrgil.
I am watching episode 3 right now, and the immediate cut from Cassian shouting: “Nobody’s listening!” to him calming Kino down to avoid raising suspicion feels odd. I think it needs another scene in between these two, but I don’t have any concrete suggestions.
Andor: Rearranged (so it’s kinda similar to your Refocused)
Or
Andor: The “Nothing Has Been Cut” Cut
But then give each movie a title like…
Sacrifice
Reckoning
Birth of Rebellion
What about Andor: The “Nothing Has Been” Cut? 😉
Sticking with your one-word titles, I would suggest “call” or “calling” for episode one, given both Cassian’s search for his sister, Syril’s sense of duty and the literal call leading both Luthen and the Morlana security dispatch to Ferrix.
For part two I would suggest “Struggle”.
What about movies one and two? For one I’d go ‘Fugitive’ but he’s not quite that. A few characters have something they desperately want in this one, but I can’t think of a word for that.
Maybe “Longing” could convey that.
These things aside, can I get a link, please?