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NeverarGreat

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11-Sep-2012
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17-Jun-2018
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Post
#1217574
Topic
The Force Awakens - The Starlight Project
Time
  1. I’ve also been thinking about the Reydream. It would be ideal to show it as an actual dream somewhere, but I don’t think it would work so late in the movie. Maybe just toning down what is there even more, so that she sees only a really vague outline of the island, would work and be less jarring for a first-time audience. They might interpret it as more of a mirage than anything on the first viewing.

  2. My idea for the interrogation is actually one of the things I’m most excited to work on, when I finally get the chance. In particular, I’d like to use the as-of-now unused images of the Starkiller beam traveling past the destroyer, since that with the voiceover of Kylo saying ‘I’ll finish what you started’ would strongly connect him in favor of the Starkiller and provide an interesting point of departure from Vader ANH. I’ve discussed the full sequence previously in the thread, but suffice it to say that I intend to make this scene much more intense.

  3. I don’t actually have strong feelings on Phasma one way or another. It’s a shame that she’s such a non-character, but on the plus side she seems to be Finn’s primary human point of grievance with the First Order, so taking her out of the last act might negatively impact Finn’s story.

And on that note, please do share your thoughts on Finn! He’s my favorite character from TFA, and recently I imagined the movie with him as the main character. There’s a good argument that Finn and Rey are both equally important main characters in this movie.

Post
#1217558
Topic
The Force Awakens - The Starlight Project
Time

Thanks for the detailed input, I’ll be referring to it when I inevitably work on the crawl some more (have a more finicky 70-100 words ever been written?)

I wish I could keep making video mockups like I did when working on Restructued, but various Premiere/computer cost issues have prevented me from doing any actual editing for a while. That’s one reason why I’m so focused on the crawl right now.

Also, Vimeo has clamped down on their storage allotment, so I’d have to make a new account there as well.

Ah well, it’s just life. I’ve recently gotten a new job, so there may be some money for hobbies soon. 😉

Post
#1217532
Topic
The Force Awakens - The Starlight Project
Time

I had another idea about restructuring the battle part of Maz’s castle. Here’s how the scene originally played out:

-Rey stays behind to hold off the troops
-Han and Finn emerge and are taken prisoner
-Resistance arrives
-Rey fights with and is immobilized by Kylo
-Cutaway to trooper requesting air support
-Kylo senses the map, orders the division out

With this, it feels like Finn has forgotten about Rey since we don’t see him looking for her as she’s being roughed up by Kylo. Also, the Resistance arrives long before Rey is even immobilized by Kylo, meaning that the parallel narratives are not in emotional sync.

Here’s the old idea for what I was trying to do by giving Kylo some more agency:
https://vimeo.com/214272131
Password: rough

-Rey stays behind to hold off the troops
-Rey fights with and is immobilized by Kylo
-Han and Finn emerge and are taken prisoner
-Kylo senses the map, orders the division out on a whim
-Resistance arrives

In this, although the narratives are more in sync it feels like too much time passes between Kylo ordering the division out and them actually retreating. Also, his extra agency isn’t really worth the illogic of his action.

Here’s the proposed new version:

-Rey stays behind to hold off the troops
-Han and Finn emerge and are taken prisoner
-Rey fights with and is immobilized by Kylo
-Resistance Arrives
-Kylo senses the map, orders the division out (no cutaway to the ‘request air support’ trooper required)

In this version the narratives are emotionally synced and there’s a clear progression from one narrative jump to another without too much time passing between them.

Post
#1217430
Topic
The Force Awakens - The Starlight Project
Time

Another day, another crawl…

The Republic is in peril.
From the Empire a new
order has risen, forging a
weapon of ultimate power.

Tormented by visions of
the mighty FIRST ORDER
and its impossible weapon,
warriors trained by Luke
Skywalker have defected
from the Republic and
driven their master, the
last of the Jedi Knights,
into exile.

With only the terms
of a tattered armistice
preventing total war,
the Senate supports a
covert RESISTANCE
to find their guardian of
peace and justice amid
the countless stars…

I think it’s really important for the story to frame the First Order as something that far predates Luke’s Jedi Academy, since the original crawl makes it seem like the First Order just appeared on the scene no more than a few years before the movie starts. I’ve also given some indication of the Galactic Concordance, which the official crawl should really have mentioned to show that the Empire was never really defeated in full.

Post
#1217197
Topic
The Force Awakens - Ridley's Edit
Time

Thanks for clarifying! It’s funny, I animated the Oscillator shaft to glow red since it seemed to make sense, not thinking about the weapon port itself. It makes sense to darken the port I suppose.

As for seeing the stream off of the star, based on your interpretation of the shadows it would make sense for the intake port to be somewhere just off the bottom left of the frame, so that the light could be sucked straight into the base.

Post
#1216913
Topic
Culture, politics, and diversity in Star Wars
Time

I propose coining a term wherein a character who displays at least a few, but not an overwhelming number of Mary Sue/Gary Stu traits be termed something else entirely, in order to bring attention to the possibility of an author avatar/unrealistically virtuous character without saddling the exponent with undue scorn for their woeful lack of awareness of the evolving connotations of originally benign lingo.

I submit that this term should be ‘Chosen One’.

As in: ‘This character is a total Chosen One. I feel vaguely bothered by how their abilities and competencies are unrealistically portrayed in order to cast them as an impervious instrument of destiny.’

Post
#1216873
Topic
The Force Awakens - The Starlight Project
Time

I’d definitely need to replace the Leia reaction shot, but if I am able to use a shot of the Raddus escaping, it might work.

The radio chatter would have to be recorded specifically to make it clear that it’s coming from Hos.

The spy subtitles idea is a bit out there, but maybe I could use a technique of suggesting Republic involvement while still keeping it vague:

Female spy: “Inform our friends…I’ve found their droid.”

This is to suggest that Republic intelligence and military are helping the Resistance, giving it eyes and ears in every corner of Republic territory.

Also, I’ve just updated the first post with the more recent ideas.

Post
#1216354
Topic
The Force Awakens - The Starlight Project
Time

I was thinking some more about the critizisms of Restructured, and how it seems like Leia is reacting to only the Hosnian destruction instead of Han’s death. Maybe cutting her slow-motion reaction into two shots would be effective - the first shot being right after Han falls down the shaft, then the destruction of Hos like before, ending with Leia closing her eyes in grief.

On a related note, Hux says that without the Republic the Resistance will be vulnerable, implying that they will suffer some immediate setback that will allow the First Order to win the race to Luke. Yet if the Republic is only providing financial assistance to the Resistance, it wouldn’t immediately be placed at a disadvantage with the destruction of the Senate. That got me to thinking about what sort of thing the Republic could provide which would be immediately ended with its destruction, and the only real answer is communication. Perhaps if the Republic was allowing the Resistance privileged backdoor access to the Holo-net at all times, which allowed them to have a vast web of spies throughout the galaxy able to communicate in real-time with the Resistance. I imagine this is how the Resistance was able to respond so quickly at Maz’s castle.

But how to suggest such a thing? I could change the subtitles of the lady at the castle, to imply that she’s using the holo-net to speak with parties unknown. And during the attack on the Republic, I could have the Resistance listening to all the frenzied communications of the Hosnian system, which are cut short in Leia’s final shot. I’m thinking of something like this:

https://youtu.be/HRkXbTTYfSU?t=2m9s

Post
#1216327
Topic
Ranking the Star Wars films
Time

When writing my alternate prequel trilogy, it took a long time (several years) to stop writing imitations of the OT in the prequel era. The thing is, I had to get my mind into a ‘Star Wars’ place in order to write something that feels like the OT, and it was only on re-reading it that the imitation of the plot and theme became obvious. TFA and TLJ suffer from this problem a lot. TFA is the more obvious since it’s a love letter to the trilogy, but even TLJ’s deconstruction requires the situations of the originals.

Creating a good Star Wars sequel requires understanding the essence of the originals and not just their surface trappings - what the films are really about - and then taking the next thematically resonant step in the story. When I was thinking about a theoretical sequel trilogy before TFA came out, the story in my mind was to be about how to teach, and how to lead. This was the obvious next step after our heroes overthrew the Empire and became leaders and teachers in the New Republic. The reason that these sequels feel superfluous in my opinion is that TFA avoids this almost entirely, and TLJ approaches it sideways with Luke’s failure. However, if JJ recognizes the opportunity of Episode 9 to deal head on with this issue, especially through Rey and Kylo, then it could be the first really essential Star Wars sequel after ROTJ.