Jar Jar Bricks

Hal already included a portion of duel of the fates in Rey and Kylo’s actual duel. I personally don’t think that’s the right moment for it, Testing.

The only other place I’d be interested in seeing it would be when the Sith cultists are chanting (I think someone made a concept of that already?)

And Chase, where exactly in the film does that footage come from? I seem to remember footage of First Order troopers on Kijimi from the documentary that could be used so we wouldn’t be removing a transition from somewhere else. Other than that, I definitely like it.

Burbin said:

Hate to be the sourpuss over so many of these proposed changes, I just think the original scene/dialogue is fine as is.

Changing Zorii’s line to “I don’t believe that (the war is over)” suggests she has a stake/opinion on the ongoing war. Along with the rest of the dialogue changes it makes it seem like she’s basically admiting to Poe that she’s part of the Kijimi rebellion, right after saying she’s planning to abandon it all and flee, alining with Poe’s sentiments that everyone’s giving up. It’s just an odd contrast. I feel the Kijimi rebellion stuff should be kept as subtle background since we’re so limited on what can actually be shown, bringing it to the forefront just exposes the limitations of being a fanedit.

Mostly agree with this. Beforehand she goes on about how she “can’t stand the cries anymore” and wants to go on her own adventures, so those ideas are partially conflicting. That’s why it’s supposed to be a surprise when she shows up on Exegol later on.

Eh, I don’t really see the point. I can only think of one X-wing pilot that would be crazy enough to pull up alone to a First Order fleet like that. So there’s really no reason to make it a surprise.

That scene between Poe and Connix is actually a deleted scene you can view, by the way. It’s not one of the ones that the novelization invented.

Which scene are you referring to exactly? The “happy beeps” one?

Did you mean for that to go in the general ideas thread Testing? I feel like that’s a more appropriate place since this thread is for a film edit.

They were already there to begin with. I merely made them even more vague. Rey mentions how there’s a bunch of First Order stuff out in the Unknown Regions, and Connix wonders what other secrets Snoke has up his sleeve. Again, both of those are there originally, I just modified them a bit.

TestingOutTheTest said:

Jar Jar Bricks said:

Surprisingly the “Luke Has A Moment” deleted scene doesn’t make an appearance in the novelization. I wrote a rough draft of what it might look like below:

Luke nearly recoiled from the gap in his doorway. The girl’s determined gaze reminded him too much of a younger version of himself. Confident. Bold. Reckless. And most importantly, foolish.

He sat down next to a floor table, easing his descent with his mechanical hand, which whirred in protest. She would never truly understand why he had chosen to leave the fight. Neither would Leia.

Leia. While he had lost the man he had come to see as his best friend, she had lost her husband. He couldn’t imagine the pain she felt right now. The worst of it all was that he alone was to blame for Han’s death. Everything was. And even if the Resistance wasn’t able to see it, his return would only make their circumstances worse. He knew that for certain.

Tears pooled on the surface of the table as Luke Skywalker wept silently.

It does reveal that Luke blames himself for things a little early, but it doesn’t reveal the specifics of that so I’m willing to overlook it.

It can already be inferred in the Falcon scene that he’s sad about losing Han.

Absolutely. But this scene serves more of a purpose than that. Because it comes right after he denies Rey’s request to return to the fight, it means he is brought to tears over what he has done and what he thinks he has to do. It isn’t just about Han.

Thanks! Currently in the part where Leia is thinking about her training with Luke. Things line up pretty neatly I’d say!

Surprisingly the “Luke Has A Moment” deleted scene doesn’t make an appearance in the novelization. I wrote a rough draft of what it might look like below:

Luke nearly recoiled from the gap in his doorway. The girl’s determined gaze reminded him too much of a younger version of himself. Confident. Bold. Reckless. And most importantly, foolish.

He sat down next to a floor table, easing his descent with his mechanical hand, which whirred in protest. She would never truly understand why he had chosen to leave the fight. Neither would Leia.

Leia. While he had lost the man he had come to see as his best friend, she had lost her husband. He couldn’t imagine the pain she felt right now. The worst of it all was that he alone was to blame for Han’s death. Everything was. And even if the Resistance wasn’t able to see it, his return would only make their circumstances worse. He knew that for certain.

Tears pooled on the surface of the table as Luke Skywalker wept silently.

It does reveal that Luke blames himself for things a little early, but it doesn’t reveal the specifics of that so I’m willing to overlook it.

Thanks Faraday!

To be honest, I’ve been pleasantly surprised thus far by how few contradictions I’ve encountered with how I have things in TROS. The only glaring thing I can think of was Han’s medal not appearing at his funeral.

Oh, that and the novelization flat out saying it would be impossible to fix Luke’s X-wing lol. Changed that as well.

I suppose I can see why someone might interpret him thrusting it back at her as a sort of invitation to lead the next generation of Jedi (which is definitely not what he wants, nor did I write it that way). All I’ll say is this: just because it’s time for something to end or die off doesn’t mean you need to take a piss on its grave. Things can come to an end with respect/decency. That’s where I draw the line. I’m glad you aren’t as bothered by it all, but I kinda am.

Agreed.

Ooh yeah I do like the idea of more prequel tie ins. Idk if I’d put that right there but definitely somewhere. Come to think of it, Luke and Dooku share a lot of similarities, ideologically speaking.

1. Snoke can be intimidating without compromising Hux’s motivations. Especially since there is an entirely new scene between the two of them that takes place on the Supremacy, I feel like the theatrical scene is kinda pointless here.

2. Thank you. Will correct that.

3. Except Luke put literally everything on the line to save his father in the OT. I think he would have the maturity at this stage in his life to be able to understand the difference between the Jedi and his father as an individual. He would see it as the Jedi organization that failed Anakin (which isn’t too far from the truth). He says as much by later claiming that the Jedi were responsible for the creation of Darth Vader.

4. I can see the symbolism there of course, but even the novelization plays the scene up as a joke. “Then Luke tossed the lightsaber off the cliff.” That could easily show up under the definition of deadpan humor. Sure, I could rewrite it to sound less comedic, but there is also symbolism in what I rewrote it as. Luke shoves the lightsaber right back into her hand, basically saying “that legend you see me as is only real in your head.”

CaptainFaraday said:

I’ve only just discovered this edit - is it still in progress? Were any of the VFX shots done? Some of them sound fantastic, albeit a lot of work.

Agreed. Especially trying to incorporate Dooku into TPM. One of my greatest gripes about the prequels is that he seemingly comes out of nowhere (since he wasn’t created until during the development of AOTC). If he at least had a cameo in TPM it would help solve some of that disjointedness.

That’s what I really like about that change Poppa made since imo it can easily be interpreted as both dark Rey and Palpatine.

And while some would call it a stretch, all of those “clones” of Rey is also a subtle hint of Palpy’s power to cheat death that way.

All I’ll say is this… no one’s being hurt by having these lines run through the AI. Even if we don’t want a specific line to be put in this edit, it would still be nice for it to be done for others. So I’d appreciate it if it isn’t too much of a bother for “No one’s ever really gone” to be run through for those who want it. Like I said, doesn’t have to be in this edit, but let’s play nice here.

NeverarGreat said:

I’m thinking in order to tie it into his character and maybe provide some closure to his ‘I will finish what Vader started’ bit, have him say ‘It’s finished’ or ‘It’s done’ right before she says ‘Ben’.

“It is finished.” Ben Solo out here about to turn into Jesus Christ lmao.

Anyways, that line “no one’s ever really gone” would be placed after he has faded into the Force and Rey is looking sad at his empty clothes. So there might need to be an ethereal filter applied. For me, it would explain why she suddenly looks happy while taking off in her X-wing, and also indicates that Kylo is chill with his uncle now since he’s quoting him. In other words, since we’re shown the other two OT characters forgiving Ben in this movie, I wanted to imply it with Luke as well since Luke didn’t really seem to give a crap about Kylo at the end of TLJ.

EDIT: Apparently the novelization actually has him saying “I will always be with you” and Rey responds with the Luke quote (which literally makes zero sense since she never heard it). I suppose just that alternative Ben quote could work instead.

Master Lawdog said:

Just got another response from Speaking of AI on additional lines for Ben Solo.

“Yep, time permitting, I should be able to help out with some Kylo Ren lines if needed.”

Nice! Besides “No ones ever really gone” and “We’ve become”, what else do we need?

Also, MR, I think that clip looks just fine. Don’t know what people are complaining about.

I really liked having the ghosts be more fluid in the age they wish to present themselves as. So if anything, imo it would probably be a better idea to simply add Shaw’s voice to the Jedi voices scene and that’s it.

Part 1 Changelog:

• Lots of trimming and making descriptions less complex. Seems like Jason Fry repeats information too many times.
• Slightly adjusted the crawl (namely making only Luke Skywalker in caps)
• Instead of a wooden figurine, Leia displays Han’s medal at his funeral for precise continuity with TROS
• Included some vague references to dark secrets being out in the Unknown Regions, as well as some Imperials never returning from there (TROS reference)
• Trimmed Poe’s prank call an appropriate amount
• Restored dialogue from the film that was changed/removed for some reason
• Removed the pointless scene between Rose and Paige Tico before the battle. I prefer to introduce the characters when they become relevant to the story itself.
• Made countless trims to BB-8’s antics with Black One. Apparently ships have a consciousness now according to the original novelization? Not a fan.
• Removed Snoke assaulting General Hux. I want to emphasize the difference between the way Kylo treats him and Snoke treats him to make his betrayal in TROS make more sense.

Link:
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1Mj3tcaJQOsxfYcxPhOENUPMe7YOPditXAF-rbrn8aKA/edit?usp=sharing

This is a project meant to be paired with my novelization of TROS. A greater rundown of the overall goals in my version of the sequel trilogy can be found there. In a nutshell, though, Kylo’s fascination with Vader plays a prominent role in that novelization. Kylo is meant to be the “stand-in” character for Anakin, since I feel that the saga should be entirely about him.

As a result, I knew while writing that novelization that I would likely have to go back and write a version of TLJ for these ideas to remain consistent throughout the whole trilogy. TFA’s novelization works fine on its own, since the idea I had was that he was more brainwashed by Snoke then (thus why he might believe following Vader meant being an apprentice). It’s only in this story where he develops his own plans, and I want him to realize that following Vader actually means establishing his bloodline as the sole rulers of the galaxy.

Another change I made with my project of TROS was having Rey be more insecure about herself, and relying on the validation of others to an unhealthy extent. I am planning on emphasizing this idea more in this novelization, especially when her parents are revealed to be nobodies that sold her off for drinking money.

This edit will be based on Poppasketti’s The Last Jedi: Rekindled. His changelog will carry over to this project for the most part. Deleted scenes and bonus content from the expanded edition will also be included where I feel it is necessary. Furthermore, I am planning on making some slight adjustments to Luke’s character/actions. Nothing too drastic, but rather more to make him more intriguing and believable. For example, he gives the Skywalker lightsaber back to Rey and tells her to “leave this island” instead of tossing it off a cliff. It achieves the same effect, but indicates that Luke respects his father while still being devoted to letting the Jedi end.

I am planning on releasing multiple chapters at once for feedback (the original novel is divided up into parts like that). I greatly appreciate any suggestions and feedback so long as they align with the goals of this project.

The music gets distorted for like 3 seconds. Just watched it again. Sometimes it does it and sometimes it doesn’t. So it’s probably an issue on my end. It’s the latest version (says I got it on January 24th). 1080p. I wouldn’t worry about it.

I appear to have stumbled upon corrupt audio at 1:06:40. It lasts for a few seconds. I’ve replayed it multiple times so it’s not an issue with my video player.

DominicCobb said:

CaptainFaraday said:

Maybe I’m just a killjoy, but the Kylo one doesn’t sound any better to my ear than someone doing a barely passable Adam Driver impression. To the point where I actually thought it was whoever had made the video introducing it first, until I realised it sounded “off” in the way that AI voices can’t quite get the inflections of sentences right.

I would say that it does actually sound just like Adam Driver, just happens that the inflection makes it clear it’s AI. That said, there’s a difference between what Adam Driver sounds like and what Kylo Ren sounds like.

But since we never hear Ben Solo say a single line, we can always look past that 😉