I decided to go ahead and save what changes I’d made since last year for a v2 release (there were actually quite a few from what I remember). Anyone else can PM me for access to it.
Yes I finished V1 of the project and I mostly finished v2. I just never ended up creating a sharable PDF of it. I’ll send you v1 in a PM though, let me know if you want v2 as well.
I agree, capitalizing the whole thing is too much. I guess capitalizing only his name doesn’t bother me as much. Ah well, just wanted to hear your opinion.
How would you feel about capitalizing Luke Skywalker instead of the two factions? TFA’s crawl already emphasizes the Resistance and First Order, so it seems somewhat repetitive here. And I’d say that Luke is at the heart of this story, really.
The ships that are destroyed in the planetary sequence are First Order ones.
Yeah I like that better DZ. Sounds pretty similar to the original actually.
Another thing I noticed: the middle paragraph is creating the insinuation that Luke’s return to the fight is something our heroes fear, which is definitely the opposite of how it should be. So how about the following instead.
In the wake of this disaster, General Leia Organa’s RESISTANCE fighters trust that the return of Jedi Master Luke Skywalker will restore a spark of hope to the fight.
I like Faraday’s. My one suggestion is “Chaos reigns!” Instead of “Chaos engulfs the galaxy!” From what I recall the crawls that have an exclamatory sentence at the beginning are usually limited to a couple words, maybe three.
EDIT: Also, this could just be me, but literally every time I read the final paragraph of TLJ’s crawl I think the word “must” belongs before “mount”. For example - “As the First Order speeds toward the rebel base, the brave heroes must mount a desperate escape.”
I’m assuming that comes from behind the scenes footage? Lmao. Honestly if the moment wasn’t supposed to be taken seriously I’d say it would just be another potential joke TLJ could have made.
I seem to recall somebody making that edit. I think all he’d say is “Hmmm, very interesting” and you’d cut out the bit about never owning a droid. That way he’s neither confirming nor denying, and trying not to overwhelm Luke with information.
If someone could send me the unaltered finale episode I could try to slot the modified footage into it. Unless somebody has already done that. (In which case, I would like a link!)
I’m pretty sure somebody on the forum already implemented it into the scene itself, but it didn’t come along with the whole episode. I have it on my hard drive at home I believe but I won’t be back there until tomorrow.
Actually I’m pretty sure in that canon comic there are a bunch of his students that go after Kylo to get justice. People just originally interpreted that line as Luke suggesting that those students turned against him as well, which isn’t the case obviously.
I’m wondering if it was supposed to be in the vision because Kylo has his hood and mask on there when he jumps in front of Rey from behind a tree. Obviously he didn’t have it in the actual fight.
Like others have said, everything sounds perfect except for “He’s worth a fortune to me”. Maybe leave that one as it as it is originally? I’m not sure.
Since Vader’s eyes will be tinted red for ANH:RHD, why aren’t they red throughout the whole OT?
Wait, this is a thing? Awesome. With the release of Rogue One I’d say it’s kinda important to keep things they way they are with Vader in ANH.
That plus the alternate takes for some of those Boba lines in ESB is gonna make things a lot better for his character.
Yup. I just never noticed that. I wonder if Rian requested it be changed back to normal.
I would definitely have preferred for his arm to be red in TLJ. There’s barely any time gap between the two films that it almost comes across as a continuity error.
It’s much more believable for it to go back to normal in TROS since there’s an entire year there.
I definitely agree with your idea about Leia and Anakin, tangelo. I actually had a moment very similar to that for my novelization of TROS. Maybe I should go back and make a version of the novel without any alternate canon changes, just enhancements like that.
One thing I will say about the SE ending is that it definitely feels like more of a saga finale, but with the sequels out now I think Yub Nub certainly has a place since it feels less like an overall conclusion to the story. Interested to see how this turns out, especially if it’s still planned to end with the funeral pyre and ghosts watching.
- Rework Padme into being a stronger character.
I really like this one. I’m reminded of the concept art which shows Padme with a dagger, implying that she actually came to Mustafar to kill Anakin. Of course, if that was always her intention then idk how you could explain her not wanting Obi-Wan to tag along since he could probably do a much better job of that, but whatever.
Another idea I had for ROTS was making it so that Anakin knows the Jedi are holding the ancient secret of Force healing in the Jedi library (TROS reference). The problem? It’s in the restricted section where only Jedi Masters can go (thus why he was so insistent on becoming a Master). Yet again, this introduces a plot hole where he should naturally take that secret for himself when he raids the temple, but maybe at that point he’s given up on the Jedi way and wants to fully commit to the dark side. Who knows.
Well, the people in the crowd were just cultists really, I doubt any of them could actually use the Force. They just worshiped the dark side.
I would actually say that as soon as the 4 ghosts show up it isn’t a fair fight anymore. Palpy is kinda screwed lmao.
Since current canon has never explained where exactly that was and what was going on there, it could be retconned into a vision of a potential future. A similar thing happens with the latest version of this project, where the Rathtar sequence is repurposed in the vision for Rey losing Finn.
“Always in motion is the future.”
The thing about the vision in TFA is that it isn’t rapid fire imagery like TROS, it’s a fairly linear journey with Rey present throughout. That’s why audio additions are really the only change that worked there.
EDIT: It may have been mentioned before, but Exegol/Palp’s house could be added by retconning that rainy planet where Kylo is killing a bunch of randos with his Knights. It looks similar enough, you could just add Palp’s place in the distance instead of that temple place.