Jar Jar Bricks

Are there any other outstanding ideas we have? It sounds like Hal isn’t too keen on AI Palpatine.

Damn bruh. So good.

Chills. Lots of chills.

RogueLeader said:

The “And you” version I just slapped together quickly because the reading came to me. I’m curious if people would prefer that line reading if I nailed it down, or like the v1 line reading. Again, not based on quality but just the line alone.

EDIT: Also, is the new shot okay?

What is this “new shot” you’re referring to? 😉 Don’t tell me or it’ll stand out all of a sudden.

I think it would work really well with that line, if perfected. I like the idea that it’s the Force which is bringing all of these defected stormtroopers together to help heal the galaxy.

krlozdac said:

I love that touch about Finn being an inspiration. However, she says “It wasn’t a decision, but like an instinct”. But her saying that Finn inspired them very clearly makes their mutiny a conscious decision, otherwise why mention it? I think it has the risk of becoming muddles between conscious decision and unconscious instinct.

I had this same thought when I was putting all this together. But I think the reason she calls it an instinct is because they did it completely in unison. As in, there were absolutely zero doubts on what they should do.

Whereas what you’re describing is more of a one-by-one laying down of the arms, which definitely is more of a decision.

Also, I take back what I said in my PM, RL. I think Finn’s line about the Resistance being where the stormtroopers belong is an excellent callback to TLJ, and it doesn’t take away from his talk about the Force itself whatsoever.

I do think that the first test is more seamless, though. “And you” would be a perfect line, but it doesn’t sound right.

Awesome! Thanks for that.

It’s frustratingly close at this point (please note I wasn’t able to fully remove her original first line in the background):
https://youtu.be/wXYFxgIqVdE?si=6_wRdXaOJ-b0hkwM

I think after a different generation of the first line we should be there. But here are the two raw lines:
https://drive.google.com/file/d/13dL8se4tcS2V0sKm5yIhWFxv4fMiMw1B/view?usp=sharing
https://drive.google.com/file/d/1OgtDE-QQTyKL5fGzrVyBfj6gzcR8TB4C/view?usp=sharing

Also - so you don’t forget, Hal - remember to fix that sound overlap before Rey starts to heal Ben 😃

Hal 9000 said:

Changed Rey’s line to Leia as she turns over the lightsaber from “your brother’s saber” to “your family’s saber” to begin to plant a seed about eventually identifying herself with the Skywalker family (AI voice provided by Jar Jar Bricks)

In a callback to a line modified earlier, when Leia hands Leia the saber before she departs the base, she tells Rey, “You are family” (AI line provided by Jar Jar Bricks)

I had nothing to do with these two. RL did both of these 😉

I used the whole sample, but something tells me I could have gotten better results faster if I’d cut out the lines she says outside.

I’d be interested in generating both of these lines again. While the first line sounds good, I think it would sound even better with different emphasis on certain words. And the second one is definitely not fully there, yet. Shouldn’t be an issue though. I only spent a few minutes trying with each (for reference, I normally spend 10-20 minutes to get ones that we actually use).

Jar Jar Bricks said:

• Jannah AI voice to make it clear her company views Finn as their inspiration for rebelling

So yeah, here’s this:
https://youtu.be/3DCC0abhlw8?si=Ldy4RsWbMnQocf-E

I think the first line sounds pretty good but the second one could be improved (or removed entirely). Really it’s only the first one that’s important.

Yeah, so his mouth his fairly invisible during the whole: “Send a ship to a world they know. Let it burn. The Final Order begins.” And this is ideally the dialog we would want to replace. Since it comes right before “She will come, her friends will follow”, we could start drafting what he could say about Rey. Perhaps something like, “My granddaughter will be my vessel in place of Kylo Ren. Do not disturb her approach.”

The trouble is that Palpatine’s voice is ingrained in all 5 channels in this scene. So… yeah. We’d need an audio wizard to patch this up.

One other fun thing I’d like to do is redub “Come to me on Exegol, General Pryde” with “Come to me on Exegol, Supreme Leader”. To make it clear that since Kylo Ren is gone he has inherited the 2nd in command below the Emperor.

Is his mouth fairly visible in that scene? I don’t remember.

I agree that the first line could be improved a significant amount, but I thought the second one was pretty convincing:
https://drive.google.com/file/d/1wIpgh7G_RLGMj1Jzoa4qcJGrMx_CZqQC/view?usp=sharing

EDIT: I doubt the hologram scene would work well because of the hologram distortion.

Jar Jar Bricks said:

I’m planning on following RL’s recommended Jannah lines because it matches up with when her face is off screen.

As for Palpatine, I think simplicity would work best here. “Long have I waited… for a worthy heir to the Sith. But Kylo Ren was weak. Empress Palpatine. You will take the throne.”

Here’s an extremely rough test of this idea (I suck at editing):
https://youtu.be/sFCtq0M8w4I?si=iF21LcwUelxgODyB

The lines sound really good to me though.

I really like that idea, RL. In canon, we literally have zero clue how Kylo figured out about the dyad. And it wouldn’t be hard to get a convincing AI Anakin voice through our new method.

It’s honestly mind-boggling that they didn’t take advantage of this opportunity in the script to begin with.

But even with this change, people can still make the argument that a pivotal moment in Finn’s arc shouldn’t have been relegated to expository dialog. Would have been cool to see a flashback similar to the one Luke gives Rey that shows what actually happened to Jannah and co.

Hal 9000 said:

I like the idea of Jannah attributing her company’s own awakening to Finn’s, like a ripple effect. Might just be a touch weird she does not react to him identifying himself or that she doesn’t recognize him on sight.

But she does react to him identifying himself. Watch it again. She exclaims: “You!?” But then it’s dropped and never mentioned again even though clearly the concept of FN-2187 is important to her.

That she wouldn’t recognize his face is completely understandable. The FO probably tried to keep his betrayal under wraps, and TFA makes it very clear that troops are supposed to keep their helmets on all the time (“Who gave you permission to remove your helmet?”)

I’m planning on following RL’s recommended Jannah lines because it matches up with when her face is off screen.

As for Palpatine, I think simplicity would work best here. “Long have I waited… for a worthy heir to the Sith. But Kylo Ren was weak. Empress Palpatine. You will take the throne.”

Ah, that’s fair enough.

So, here’s what I believe I still need to help with:

• Jannah AI voice to make it clear her company views Finn as their inspiration for rebelling
• Take a second look at 3PO AI lines which weren’t up to snuff last time with this new method.
• Maybe (big maybe) an AI Palpatine line in place of “For my grandchild to come home! I never wanted you dead, I wanted you here.”

Am I missing anything else?

RogueLeader said:

I wasn’t making this for Ascendant, just testing out some lines for a Rey Nobody edit, but I was planning to replace the “Do you still count the days since your parents left?” line with something relevant to this. It works fine for a Rey Nobody edit, but I liked the idea of paralleling Kylo’s cracked mask with Rey’s cracked lightsaber. And also play into her identity stuff.

He doesn’t see the actual blade in this scene obviously, but he sees the hilt on her waist, and sees she has repaired it.

I still think AI Kylo should replace some of the lines he tells her on Pasaana.

Considering the fact that Kylo should know at this very moment that her parents didn’t abandon her and instead just wanted to keep her safe, it’s not something that he should be getting her all rialed up about. There are other things he could tell her about her inner darkness to really set her off. Such as her lightsaber, as you’ve pointed out, or even that old line we had been considering: “My mother doesn’t see the darkness in you. Your friends don’t either. But I do.”

oviniboy said:

i even wonder if someone should aknowledge the broken saber itself, maybe Kylo.

I think we discussed this at some other point. The problem is that he doesn’t see it for the first time until he’s trying to run her over with his ship, and it sounds like we prefer to keep that scene silent.

And all other scenes after that between them have important dialog that can’t really be interrupted.

I for one think the only hole that needs patching in TLJ is Holdo. There is a clearly ADR dialog spoken when she says “I’ve dealt with plenty of trigger happy flyboys like you.”

The idea would be to replace that with something like “But there could be a First Order informant on board.”

So the whole thing would go as follows: “Of course you do. I understand. But there could be a First Order informant on board. You’re impulsive, dangerous, and the last thing we need right now. So stick to your post, and follow your orders.”

Jar Jar Bricks said:

I was actually thinking of Luke’s line: “It didn’t scare me enough then.” This would go a long way toward making Rey feel like she is some sort of monster.

I also think Kylo saying “It belongs to me” over the lightsaber shot would work well. It would partially explain why Rey tells Leia that she has to earn her family’s saber.

I was actually thinking of Luke’s line: “It didn’t scare me enough then.” This would go a long way toward making Rey feel like she is some sort of monster.