Oh, great, I was just about to post this in the other thread but I see this is already up, so here it is:
Suggestions for Return of the Jedi (part 2)
I suggest no drastic changes, merely something along the line what Ady did with the prev two.
Mostly I’d like to point out logical and behavior errors, and suggest changes, to fix those.
And I apologise in advance, if any of this was already mentioned, but I did not read everything.
Opening scene
While the approach of Vader’s shuttle, the conversation between the pilot and the docking bay officer, don’t sit quite right:
"… code clearance blue. We are starting our approach, deactivate the security deflector shield."
The starting our approach here means they are starting the prep for docking.
But, the pilot must know the proper procedure. He can ask for shield deactivation but can not start the approach before the ship is cleared, mainly because he can not risk crushing into the shield, so the “We are starting our approach” is out of place.
After the control officer tells him: “you are cleared to proceed”, the shuttle pilot says this line again, but it is right this time.
It should be like this:
- … code clearance blue. Deactivate the security deflector shield."
- The security deflector shield will be …. Stand by.
- You are cleared to proceed.
- We are starting our approach.
Tatooine
Someone mentioned here on the boards Jabba’s palace being on Nal Hutta. It’s kinda good idea I think, and it would mean no continuity error either. In ESB Luke tells Lando and Chewie that he meets them at the randezvous point on Tatooine, but does not say that Jabba is actually on Tatooine.
The opening crawl could be changed accordingly
But this would present a problem, that is the Sarlacc pit in the middle of the desert. That is iconic, and I think it needs to stay as it is. Maybe they could fly into a desert or something.
Im not sure if it is doable, but if it is, than the line, “I used to live here you know” and Han’s response must be cut.
This is not an important change, but I don’t see why not.
The first real continuity problem on Tatooine is that Threepio mentions Chewie never returned from Jabba’s palace. Than we see him captured by a bounty hunter, just arriving to Jabba’s palace. This needs to be fixed.
I think Threepio’s line should be like: “Poor Lando Calrissian never returned from this awful place”
Jabba’s palace
The spider droid, when Artoo and Threepio enters, is crap. I suggest to replace that with something else.
When R2 and 3PO enters the throne room, in the background we can hear part of Greedo’s dialog talking to Solo in the Mos Eisley cantina from TNH. That always bothered me, does not feel right.
Fixing that lame tentacle that tries to grab Threepio would be a minor but welcome change.
When Threepio and Artoo enters the droid torture chamber, the droid that will be disintegrated just hangs in there. Could be electroshocked slighty several times maybe?
Minor detail that the desintegration of the protocol droid is to Threepio’s right, yet EV-9D9 points to the other direction.
Removing Jedi rocks, and restoring the original is what I can support whole heartedly.
I’d like to mention that on the exterior shot, the twin suns of Tatooine are more realistic than in the New hope, but certainly very different.
Doing something with the Rodian’s fingers in the background, during the Rancor scene, would be a nice touch. It looks bad.
Tatooine
I would like to keep the added footage of the Sailbarge travel scene, but the shadows of the ships seems off.
Please use the original Sarlacc Pit, without the Sarlacc’s head or whatever that is.
Save Boba Fett. Everybody likes him, and his death was ridiculous. Please.
After Tatooine
Maybe it would be wise to rearrange the sequence of events after Tatooine.
First, cut the departure from Tatooine into two segments. First ends when Han says: "Now, I owe you one."
Then insert the deleted scene of Vader walking the corridor of the Death Star making his way to his meditaion chamber, and talking to Luke through the Force, if the quality can be enhanced to be inserted.
Then cut back to Luke’s cockpit, when Artoo asks Luke about the destination. When Luke smiles briefly could be cut, and start from the point when he answers Artoo, and puts the glove on his mechanical hand.
I think these two scenes in this order fit together, gives emotional depth, and some dark tone.
Dagobah should follow this.
Dagobah
If it’s possible make Luke do a clean entry and landing on the planet, for the the whole sequence to work better here. It should not take long just that it could subtly indicate that Luke’s has grown, since the last time he was here. (6 weeks ago)
The first Dagobah scene needs some facelift. When we see the back of the X-wing it seems like it stands on nothing. That shot looks bad.
Some people said that Yoda’s death is pointless, but Yoda has to die, since Luke must be the last of the Jedi, and this is an emotional scene that needs to stay.
After Dagobah
It should be the Rebel HQ briefing first, followed by the Emperor’s arrival, then cut back to the Rebel fleet hangar scene.
This way the Imperial fleet arrives to Endor about the same time, as the briefing happens.
The reason for this is that knowing that the Emperor brought an armada to set a trap, especially if Ady wants to add more ships, makes Mon Monthma’s line ‘… the Imperial fleet is spread throughout the galaxy …’ sound bad, as it is now.
The Emperor’s arrival
This scene could be extended by showing the Emperor’s shuttle exiting a Superstardestroyer with several TIE Interceptors as protective escort, and several stardestroyers and TIE squadrons patroling the area
The rebel fleet hangar scene
Looks real bad, it could use a severe facelift
Endor space
The scene makes no sense, when Han tells Chewie that he needs to keep his distance, yet he flies as close to that stardestroyer that they nearly hit it. Maybe that is flying real casual on Kashyyyk, but in a movie on earth makes no sense.
The other thing is that Han requests the deactivation of the deflector shield, yet he is flying to Endor, that has no deflector shield. The Death Star has. At least that what we’ve seen on the holoprojector. Vader confirms the Endor shield later, when he reports to the Emperor:
“A small rebel force has penetrated the shield, and landed on Endor.”
So Endor has to have a shield too, and the holoprojector should show that shield too. Something like Scarif would not fit well I guess, so something more subtle would be a good idea.
On Endor
When Luke shoots down one of the speederbikes, he turns to right, following the one scout trooper who he shot down, and not the other, who goes left. Seems odd, especially as we see on the next shot that Luke is right behind this other guy.
Please keep the ‘mother dialog’, and fix this in ROTS, by keeping Padme alive.
Remove Leia saying, “I know, somehow I’ve always known”. That line always bothered me as well.
Fix Vader’s head going through the shuttle when exiting on Endor.
Vader says to Luke: “Obi-wan once thougt as you do”. But actually, he didn’t. He said: “Only the Sith deals in absolutes. I do what I must.” Then he ignites his light sabre to kill him. The next time they met, there wasn’t even as much talking from Obi-wan, as he just grabbed his light sabre the moment he felt Vader’s presence. So this line might as well be cut.
Sullust space
Admiral Ackbar says “prepare to jump to hyperspace on my mark”, and Lando answers “all right, stand by”. And then he jumps into hyperspace!
What the hell. Admiral Ackar never gave the GO, and I thought standing by means waiting for the order, not jumping on my own. Maybe it would be wise to switch the two jump segments, that the Calamari Cruser with the Admiral jumps first.
That would clearly work as a ‘MARK’ by the Admiral I guess.
Space battle
I was thinking about that it would look great the Imperial fleet moving from behind Endor on both sides of the planet, when the fleet arrives but maybe that would spoil the moment when the rebel ships turning away from the Death Star.
Anyway, please spread the Imperial fleet, so it looks more like a trap.
I think too adding a couple of Interdictors to the Imperial Fleet would be a nice touch
It is just pathetic that a ship like a Superstardestroyer was destroyed by an A-wing flying into the bridge. Attack the Excutor with several large Rebel fregatts, after it’s shields are gone.
The other thing is that the superstardestroyer Executor is 19 km in lenght, and the 2nd Death Star is 160 km in width, lenght, height. When the Executor crushes into the Death Star, the surface seems completely flat, despite what we see from the Death Star is about 60 km flat surface.
Clearly the surface needs to be visibly curved. Im not good at geometry but someone surely can work it out how it should look like.
Unless of course, the whole crushing scene is cut, since it makes no sense, why would it crush into the Death Star, while we can clearly see, that the battle is lot further away from the the Death Star.
Initially the Rebel ships distance are approximately (maybe) 3-4 Death Star length, and then they move away. That is 160 km x 3 or 4, so it’s like 550 km.
On the other hand, strange things happen all the time, and Lucas liked the idea, so who am I to argue with George.
I hope Adywan will find a solution, that works.
Emperor’s throne room
Should see a more epic space battle through the windows
Light sabre fight:
Vader falling for no reason. Can it be fixed?
Endor battle
I read that some suggest more rebel troops on Endor, but they just had no way to get there. Only one rebel ship was able to land on Endor, because the Empire let them. During the battle there is no way that a slow transportship can survive a ferosious Imperial attack. Not to mention the shield is up, so no ship can land on Endor, whatever shield that is Han wants to get deactivated, but it is there, because he says so.
So the only rebels on Endor are the commando led by Han. They are about a dozen of them, and they establish a defensive perimeter around the back entrance of the bunker, while Han and Leia tries to open the door. They do what they suppose to do.
But prior to that, when the Ewoks attack, they have really no idea what they doing. They bump into each other etc… They do not look like a well trained elite force.
(edit: I read that Adywan shoots new footage, so I hope this will be fixed.)
Another scene resequencing
Moving the destruction of the shield generator segment to after Palpatine’s death, would fix a behaviour problem, because that is an event that was not forseen by the Emperor, so things are clearly not transpiring according to his design, and this disturbance in the Force should be very-very alarming.
Celebration
The celebration on Coruscant makes no sense. Why would an Imperial planet celebrate.
Keep the new celebration, but turn it into the old yub-nub celebration at the point when the Ewoks village appears, if possible. Fits that enviroment much better.
And the one thing that everybody agrees on I guess, restore Sebastian Shaw for god sake.
(On a side note, don’t how did Vader learn this. It was Qui-gonn, than Yoda and Obi-wan who learned this. He maybe researched this after he killed Obi-wan, and found the answer, but it’s not too convincing.
Still it’s fantasy, so he learned this, end of story. It is nice to see the redeemed Anakin at the end.)
