Anakin Starkiller

Have Luke call Kylo Keelo. Lando mispronounces Han’s name, so it’s poetry.

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13483761/1/Palpatine-s-Return

Forest Moon of Endor - Night
In the distance is a lively Ewok village. Debris is falling from the sky. One chunk too big to burn up is shot down by an X-Wing. Another chunk, though, despite its small size, does not burn up. Instead, it strikes the ground, leaving behind a crater. An Ewok comes to investigate, and a hand weakly reaches out of the crater.

Ewok Village - Night
Several Ewoks arrive carrying a barely moving cadaver. It’s so burned it’s unidentifiable. The others all gasp in amazement.

Ewok Hut - Day
The corpse is seated on a throne of sticks and bones. The Ewoks appear slightly less well groomed. Two more Ewoks show up with another healthier Ewok prisoner. They hold him up to the corpse and he absorbs the poor little furry fellow’s essence, Dark Crystal style. After a moment, the corpse moves his mouth a little. He breathes a sigh of satisfaction. Then, he lets out a maniacal laugh in the unmistakable voice of Palpatine.

Ewok Hut - Night
The Ewoks are now disgustingly mangy. Palpatine is vaguely recognizable. An absurdly tall human in an extravagant outfit enters, accompanied by two First Order stromtroopers. The man bows and after a moment, the stormtroopers confusedly follow his example.
Palpatine: Geraltin Snoke. What took you so long?
Snoke: I’m sorry, my Lord. I sensed you were still out there, but we had to regroup and regain our strength before we could risk a voyage so deep into Republic space.
Palpatine: I trust you have made the preparations for my transportation.
Snoke: Yes, my lord.
One of the stormtroopers brings forth a hovering throne.
Snoke: And what of Lord Vader?
Palpatine: He has succumbed to weakness and gotten the fate he deserved. Think no more of him.
Snoke: Very well.

Exegol Temple
Palpatine emerges from a bacta tank, looking mildly healthier, but still in poor shape. Snoke, now sporting a large scar across his head, enters, escorting a Gungan prisoner dressed in formal attire.
Gungan: Yousa crazy if yousa think da Senate gonna stand for disa.
Snoke: Oh don’t worry, senator. They will be dealt with soon enough.
Palpatine: I grow tired of these feeble sacrifices. I need you to perform the ancient dyad technique.
Snoke: You mean…?
Palpatine: Yes.
They both begin chanting Ancient Sith in unison as the gungan is lifted into the air. He starts spinning faster and faster and faster until his eyes start glowing white and then burst into flames that then start pouring out of his mouth and there’s energy going everywhere, and Snoke’s face is being sucked in and boom- …the gungan’s gone.
The energy is absorbed by Palpatine, now looking in decent shape, as he did in The Rise of Skywalker. He stands more firmly, tossing away the cane he had been using. Snoke, now scarred to look as he did in The Force Awakens and The Last Jedi, bows.
Snoke: Welcome back, my lord.
Palpatine: My lord? No. From now on, you shall call me master, Darth Rifficus.
Close up of Snoke’s surprised eyes.

Hercules is public domain. Make that happen (as a novel). I’m sure there’s an audience for it.

How 'bout at the end of TLJ, instead of taking the throne, Kylo goes rogue and Pryde becomes Supreme Leader. Not sure what it would add, but it’d be different. Kylo going rogue Zuko style was what I envisioned him doing before we had the full trilogy, and I still think it’d be kinda neat. Maybe he takes the post of Supreme Leader initially but abandons it and the First Order altogether after the Battle of Crait?

Idk… That seems pretty in line with how the Force works.

FreezingTNT2 said:

Since we’re talking about disappointing aspects of the sequel trilogy, I’d say one of the most disappointing aspects of the trilogy is having The Force Awakens and The Last Jedi take place so close to each other.

They could’ve had The Last Jedi take place two or three years after The Force Awakens, with Rey training under Luke since after The Force Awakens. The Resistance subplot can start off the same (the whole evacuation and space chase stuff), Kylo has continued his training that was mentioned by Snoke in the last film, Rey and Kylo have their interactions, etc. Luke would refuse to leave because he’s worried that he would have to confront Snoke and Kylo, two powerful dark side Force-users, and that he would die, but he is convinced by Anakin/Obi-Wan/Yoda to leave the island and confront them.

These are just random ideas I’m throwing out there.

Yes.

Reimagine the Yuuzhan Vong into Gigeresque biomechanical monstronsities, and the Yuuzhan Vong gods into Lovecraftian entities, and I’d get behind that.

And yes.

Make RotJ like Part 2 of the Nutcracker ballet where it’s just people watching musical numbers in Jabba’s palace for two hours.

Wow, that’s a terrible idea. I do love the idea of the Imperial Remnant and New Republic teaming up against an external threat. There’s no doubt in my mind that that threat should be he Yuuzhan Vong, and I say that as someone who’s never read any of the books they’re in. The idea of these super metal looking baddies wielding biotechnology just sounds awesome, and suitably alien for a race from another galaxy.

See this is why I respects Hal’s edits. They’re simple fixes rather than futzing around with the entire continuity. I have having to deviate from Canon in my edits, generally reserving it for the two egregious crimes of contrived lineage twist and more Death Stars (both of which have somehow happened twice). Maybe lightsaber colors, but really, I like to have versions of the films close enough that things line up when looking at external material so the edits aren’t just this weird bubble universe.

My main criticism of fan-edits that I have seen is their titles: In their attempts to replace the corny but sincere original titles with something better, they usually make it worse by trying so hard to be taken seriously. Also, they shouldn’t be shorter than 2 hours.

This.

The comedy sequence with the elevators and R2 does not fit the tone of the movie at all, and it stalls in a movie that is usually very good about not wasting time.

That scene’s a classic!

I agreed that both versions of the RotJ celebration are good and think the SE version would best be moved to the end of the Saga.

As for changes of my own, people always talk about Anakin being a creep in AotC, but Han is just as bad in ESB. Maybe some trims could fix that? I agree the film is grossly overrated.

Switchitup said:

I think this score would fit perfectly into the rey and kylo Ren fight on the second death star. I hated how there was no big score it was just the waves crashing by. It needed its own Orginal score but this is a good compromise.

https://youtu.be/XHxOg6zNg9Q

Lol I was thinking the same thing. I just wish the mashup wasn’t so trailer-y. You know, over-the-top epic that builds up.

Darth Lucas said:

I’m curious if it would be possible to substitute Starkiller base in TFA with the fleet of mini Death Star Destroyers in TROS. Perhaps it’s a fleet of Star Destroyers where on their own, they’re very powerful, but all together can destroy planets. Like they took the power of the Death Star and spread it out so it wouldn’t be as easy as destroying ONE weapon to take it down, but the enemy would have to destroy every single star destroyer.

Thus, its as dangerous as the Death Star, without simply being another Death Star, and they are more difficult to destroy, as they’re smaller and the first order has more on standby of one is destroyed.

This way the fleet can be a more constant threat throughout the trilogy. (Maybe Starkiller Base functions more as the hangar where the fleet is kept? Idk I’m just spitballing at this point.)

The destruction of the fleet in TROS can feel like more of an ultimate victory. It took all the reinforcements brought by Lando to finally bring them down.

This is what I’ve been saying since TFA came out. Make them planet-destroying star destroyers. The dreadnoughts in TLJ and Sith fleet in TRoS only further validate this idea.

Honestly, the ST has done multiple solid romances after both previous trilogies couldn’t even get one without it being creepy.

But back on topic, I think the problem with the kiss is that while the subtext is there in TLJ, it’s just that: subtext. I didn’t catch onto it on first viewing and even after the Reylos converted me, I still wasn’t sure if those vibes were intentional or not. The elevator scene definitely has them in spades.

So point is, you’d need to make their feelings a little more explicit.

To me, including Anakin has nothing to do with that silly prophecy.

Vader’s floating ashes is probably Palpatine leading Kylo to him with the Force.

Ben can revive Rey and live because dyad. There. Problem solved.

Do we need her to do that, though?

Wouldn’t it be simpler to just remove Leia’s Jedi backstory altogether? What does it really contribute to the plot besides a lightsaber that could’ve been anyone else’s?

After my recent pseudo-successes with EBsynth, I think it might be feasible to realize my idea of a robo-Palpatine. You know, with half his face mechanized? Maybe he could even get rid of the metal bits once he’s restored and revert to his unscarred Prequel appearance.

Add Jazza’s evil Luke and Rey.

Hey, I’d be down for feature length versions of Galaxy of Adventures.

Rey adopting the name Skywalker, along with her being nobody, is something I wanted from very early on in this trilogy, and unlike the latter, which I treated as a given they’d do, I wasn’t sure they’d have her adopt the name Skywalker, but the madlads actually did it and I’m so glad.

Then what’s the finale?

EddieDean said:

Sounds good, but then what’s the climax of the movie?

Still the same. It’s just Palpatine would be ghost up until that point rather than a cyborg. It really makes no difference. The plot point of him restoring himself through dyad’s energy is already in film.

If Yoda’s stronger, why didn’t he take on Palpatine himself?

Regardless we’re getting off topic. What if Snoke was a senator in the New Republic and that’s where the money was coming from. He has a whole planet’s economy backing him.

Which reminds me, I’ve always thought TFA should’ve present the New Republic as divided in a proxy war between those funding the Resistance and those funding the First Order. It would explain why the Republic military doesn’t directly interfere: it’s officially neutral. Of course the First Order blows up the Senate and from there it’s open warfare.

What he said.