walkingdork

corellian77 said:

Just bumped a 6 year old myspleen thread.

Ah-ha. It all makes sense now.

I don't think I have ever posted in Adywan's ESB thread and I'm ignored.

Warbler said:

damn wtf is it with people covering for a child molester?   I just don't get it.

Maybe one of us should ask our local Catholic priest why it happens...just make sure you don't go there alone :O

PSYCHO_DAYV said:

Warbler said:

none said:

"I say that I am innocent of those charges," said Sandusky

yeah, sure he is.    I think we should amend the Constitution to make it legal to castrate sick a-holes like Sandusky. 

CASTRATING THEM ISN'T ENOUGH.  SEND THEM DOWN HERE TO TEXAS.  WE HAVE A SPECIAL CHAIR HERE THAT MAKES THE BEST BARBECUE.

Aww, can't we do both? My grandfather once said they should nail their scrotum to the center post of a barn, give them an ax, and light the barn on fire. Let them choose whether they want to burn to death or hack their own nuts off. Of course the jokes on them as either option will result in death.

TV's Frink said:

 

none said:

This is a SW forum, shouldn't we use the 'There is another' joke?

I think you just did...and you probably shouldn't have.

 

I thought it was funny.

Warbler said:

I agree with Frink.   Child molestation is not something that should be joked about. 

So you are saying you've never made or laughed at a Michael Jackson joke? (although I personally don't believe MJ actually molested anyone)

darth_ender said:

Uh, sick...Well, I've been waiting for this moment >:)

So, this coworker likes big...you know.  Maybe she's referring to you as a person, not just a part of you.  If she'd asked me a month ago, I would have told her you're a big one, but don't worry, she likes you for it.  I guess your username is more fitting than we thought.

Was that ruthless enough?  Don't judge all of us based on me because I simply could not pass up this sort of comeback.  I'll be cleaner from now on :)

I was excited when I saw that you post on this thread. Not quite ruthless enough though, but very funny.

I've used the name walkingdork for over 7 years. Walking dead + nerd = walkingdork, but yes I it does sound like a penis out for stroll. :)

doubleKO, if your avatar gets me off is it a handjob or a blowjob? Either way would creepy....and I'm into it.

TV's Frink said:

 

Warbler said:
*sigh*   I give up  C3PS will never understand about sports.    

Pfft. I understand sports as much as anyone here, and you already know I agree with C3.

 

Warbler, I think all three of us (Frink, C3PS, and myself) realize the tragedy that Penn State has lost their legend and that they upset. What we are saying is kids, at any age, should realize that Paterno is part of horrible scandal and deserves to be removed from his college football legend status. That's it.

If your dad rapes a chick it doesn't matter how much you love the guy, you still have to admit your dad is a piece of shit.

Bingowings said:

You could give her a taste of her own medicine and declare a shared interest in big dicks (I've been out of circulation for a couple of decades so in today's jaded meat market that might lead you to places I never knew existed).

Hahaha! Perfect.

My brother said I should have responded by saying I was into tight vaginas or into skinny chicks (she's a little thick but in all the right places).

PSYCHO_DAYV said:

Davnes007 said:

walkingdork said:

...I have no idea how to handle it.

Just f**k her.

Have a good time.

Make each other feel good.

Maybe you'll get a great relationship out of the whole experience.

HE'S RIGHT.

Yeah, you two are probably right. I'm probably just making the situation more complicated.

Leonardo said:

yeah, I'd give an arm and a leg to be in your shoes, w.d.

especially given the pain I'm going through right now. Of all the Charlie Browns in the world, I'm the Charlie Browniest...

Well Charlie Brown, I'm sure there is a Peppermint Patty out there somewhere. How are you the Charlie Browniest though?

Sorry for the triple post!

CP3S said:

walkingdork said:

(okay so here's the actual conversation part)

So we are hanging out at the same bar as before and she says out of nowhere, "I like large penises." It was like she couldn't wait to get it out there. She continued and said that she has been lucky when it comes to men with big dicks. So not knowing how to act towards such a statement I just say, "Well Baby, your luck has run out."

Wait, what? Is that really that weird? I mean, you guys hung out before and she made it clear she was sexually interested in you, and you still hung out with her again, which naturally would suggest to her that the sex thing isn't off the table. Add a little alcohol to the mix, and talk of genitals seems like a fairly reasonable topic for conversation.

I take it the weird part is she simply assumed you have a large penis without having any reason to suspect it?

Which part exactly is "goofy shit"? Just the fact that she so blatantly wants to have sex with you, or the penis conversation?

 

As far as the two Daves' sentiments about just going for it, I most definitely see your hesitation. 21 is really young and she sounds kind of immature. I wouldn't be opposed to having a casual sexual relationship with a co-worker, if it could be just that. But at 21, the chances of that going over without out-of-control drama in both your personal and work life seems much less likely.

 

So now I'm in this super awkward situation and I have no idea how to handle it. She is my coworker after all.

With tears in your eyes and a shameful quiver in your voice, tell her you have a really, really, really tiny dick, and that after her comment about liking big penises, you'd be too ashamed to even try it for fear that she wouldn't even be able to feel it. From there just tell her you'd like to keep things professional.  ;-)

Yes, that she is 21 is difficult. I definitely feel like if this goes South it's going to be dramatic and since there are only 9 employees where I work it could get bad very quick.

It's not that I have a (very) small dick, but it seems like anyone who would ever bring it up so casually like that is A) a bit of a cock hound and B) really into huge dicks and not into anything less that a horse dong. Maybe she is fed up with all the small dicks she has encountered and feels she needs to explain her need for a giant dick ahead of time.

Sure I could say, "hey your large penis comment has perhaps made me a little self-conscious about my less than a Mag Flashlight sized penis. I'm interested in you and I haven't heard any complaints thus far so maybe we can get together at the bar and hang out again?" but if again if that goes south, everyone at my job thinks I have a tiny prick.

Pennsylvania Jones said:

walkingdork said:

darth_ender said:

Tell her you are religious and believe in sex only after marriage ;)

Boring! Besides I was once married so it technically would be "after marriage"

CLARIFICATION TIME!!!  Tell her you are religious and believe in sex only with your wife. ;)

I'm divorced. It was a the fun kind of divorce that ends after a couple years of marriage when both parties say, "yeah, this is not going to work let's called it before it get's ugly." :)

darth_ender said:

Tell her you are religious and believe in sex only after marriage ;)

Boring! Besides I was once married so it technically would be "after marriage"

Strange conversation (I'm high bear with me):

So my coworker has pretty much said in so many words that she is interested in me. She's 21 and I'm 29. Couple weeks ago she and I got drunk and she wanted me to go home with her with the intention of having sex. I declined because she's drunk, she's my coworker, and I don't want to have regrets and weirdness afterward.

So the next week she says in so many words that she would not have regretted that decision but thinks we should just hang out more and see what happens. So we go to the bar...

(okay so here's the actual conversation part)

So we are hanging out at the same bar as before and she says out of nowhere, "I like large penises." It was like she couldn't wait to get it out there. She continued and said that she has been lucky when it comes to men with big dicks. So not knowing how to act towards such a statement I just say, "Well Baby, your luck has run out."

Granted she is probably pretty buzzed, but who makes those kinds of statements during what is barely considered a first date? Fortunately a bunch of my friends showed up and she and her friend had to go somewhere else.

Now a few days later she is texting me and wants to get together again. At a younger age, I would have laughed it off and continued to see her, but the 29 year old me, is thinking "I'm way to old for this goofy shit."

So now I'm in this super awkward situation and I have no idea how to handle it. She is my coworker after all.

Tyrphanax said:

http://www.thedailyshow.com/watch/thu-november-10-2011/penn-state-riots?xrs=share_copy

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=mXCZKUp45o0

 

http://www.rhrealitycheck.org/article/2011/11/11/fifteen-adults-knew-about-child-sexual-assaults-at-penn-state-and-did-not-act

Daily Show also compared the situation to the Catholic Church cover up. Too bad they didn't have my joke about sending the offender to another college. It woulda killed :P okay, maybe not.

Warbler said:

CP3S said:

Warbler said:

I have to say Frink,  when you were 18-21 years of age,  you must have been very wise, smart, and mature for your age. 

I side with Fink 100% on this.

And I don't get what that has to do with maturity or wisdom.

sometimes, it takes maturity and wisdom to understand what is right and wrong.   I believe that is case here.   I believe it would be very easy for someone who was young and immature to think it was wrong to fire Paterno, and to be upset by it.    To a lot of people there, he was their hero.   Why is it wrong for them to be broken hearted over this?   Try and put yourselves their shoes.    

I just disagree that it takes either maturity or wisdom to realize that a guy who knew about that sort of thing and said nothing should be fired. I understand the heart break, but kids need to realize that the right call was made.

walkingdork said:

My hope is that in 2 years people don't pretend to forget what's happened and begin to gush over Paterno again. I can just picture a new Joe Paterno statue at Penn State in a few years and that's pathetic.

there already is a statue of him there.  Yeah, as much as I hate to say it, there should never be another one. 

Agreed.

 Paterno meant more to Penn State than Lombardi means to Green Bay.  

Blasphemy of the highest nature. Lombardi ranks just below Jesus in this state. It's hard to walk into a school or business in Wisconsin and not see a plague, sign, poster, picture, etc of Lombardi or a quote of Lombardi (he has many famous quotes about life and football).

There are countless pubic buildings, streets, bars, etc named after Lombardi. No Wisconsin coffee table is complete without some book of great moments or quotes from the life of Vince Lombardi.

If Vince Lombardi were still alive today, woman would wash his feet with their hair and he would walk the land and perform miracles including turning feeding 5,000 men with a single brat and turning water into beer.

In short Vince Lombardi is the mother fucking man in Green Bay and all of Wisconsin. :)

Warber, Yeah Paterno is a college football legend and he IS Penn State, but this is the sort of thing that is unforgivable and Paterno deserves to fall (hard) from the grace of Penn State. I agree with Frink that students need to get over themselves and realize that Paterno deserves all the shame he gets.

My hope is that in 2 years people don't pretend to forget what's happened and begin to gush over Paterno again. I can just picture a new Joe Paterno statue at Penn State in a few years and that's pathetic.

Let go people. I was once a hardcore Brett Favre fan until he went to the Vikings and talked shit about Green Bay and the people of Wisconsin and sexted his dick to some chick. The two stories are obviously very different but I would predict that Paterno will get a new statue in Penn State before Brett Favre gets one in Green Bay.

This thread isn't nearly "ruthless" enough...and I blame darth_ender  that fairy tale believing, magic underwear wearing, multiple teenage girl marrying, doorbell ringing, Tebowing mother fucker.

Have a nice day and remember, no tagbacks! You'll have your chance to get me back. :-P

Maybe they should've just transferred the child molester to a different college like they do with Catholic priests. :)

You stumble home drunk and realize you've lost your keys. Walking around the back you decide to crawl onto a garbage can. Prepare to enter...THE SPOOKY WINDOW

I blame George Michael for wanting my sex.

I blame George W Bush for the nonsense in the Politics thread.

darth_ender said:

Yeah, I understand.  I just don't want our "unconventional" ideas to completely define us and I wanted to throw that in there before the thread entirely lost its steam.

But that's the problem, we are defined by what makes us unique.

darth_ender said:

I worry that this thread may have provided a bit of an improper perspective of my Church because most of the questions asked dealt with rather tangential topics that were not core aspects of my faith.  I'm sure they are greater interest to most because they are either major sources of criticism or simply are distinctive aspect, but I feel that I should say that most of those things are not core doctrines, and most of them are seldom talked about.  Yes we believe them, but they are not essential to our understanding. 

 

 

I think the reason we bring those topics is because those are just the topics we know the least about. In America where religion is everywhere, we all know the core beliefs of Christianity already so we want the details about what makes you different from more conventional denominations.

TV's Frink said:

I thought he was named "Jim."

No, his name is Steve and the stories of his glory have been told in the films of American football for decades. A statue in his image was erected and displayed in the halls of fame for all to see. For he was the leader of men, defending the ancient city of Saint Francis from the Raiders of Oakland, the Cowboys of Dallas, and the mighty Sodomites of Green Bay (called Packers).

CP3S said:

darth_ender said:

However, the best answer I've heard, which came from a black member of the Church BTW, is that God allowed an additional challenge to strengthen his people.

That is the best answer you've ever heard? That doesn't even make any sense. Which portion of his people was he strengthening with that? The African American Mormons? Hadn't they been through enough? You could honestly use the "strengthening his people" rebuttal for just about any crappy policy any religion ever had. So, prophet Brigham Young, due to prejudices his social climate created within him... had a prophecy from God telling him to ban African Americans from being leaders in the church? Shouldn't prophecies from God be slightly more universal and less influenced by current prejudices?

 

In other words, he would have allowed whatever legal, fiscal, and social ramifications come upon the Church, but he felt God commanded that polygamy end.  And since it was always taught to be an exception instead of a rule, this should not be interpreted as a matter of convenience to anyone.

Why does it being an exception to the rule make it less of a convenience? The church condoned polygamy, polygamy becomes illegal, and hey, guess what, while God's laws are more important than federal law, it turns out God is changing his views on polygamy to match those of the US government. Not a matter of convenience, just God keeping up with the times, I suppose. If polygamy would have remained something supported by the church for the next long while, I assume the notion that it was because God was strengthening his people would be a valid.

I agree. And why should it be so hard to imagine a human being (whether a holy man or not) adjusting the laws to the political times. Doesn't the Bible say to "obey the laws of the land?" It's not like Religious leaders never make political decisions.

Different denominations of Protestant Christians decided to allow female reverends/pastors/whatever because that's just the world we live in now. Those churches realized the change in society and changed their rules. They didn't need to hear the voice of God say, "Hey Brigham, let someone else have a chance to be a leader. Oh and good news, one of your descendants will be damn good at football. They shall call him....Steve."