Escape - Leia - New Test
Leia still feels obviously composited into the shot. I wonder how much of that is just me looking for it though. lol
Look for my last feedback which will explain why. TLDR: scaling of Leia starting too small.
Just a shower thought…
Can Obi’s:
“Then my friend is truly dead. Goodbye, Darth.”Be edited to:
“My friend is not dead. Goodbye, Darth”This can help to explain why Obi leaves and does not kill him. It will also explain Vader’s line of “Obi-Wan once thought as you do” in ROTJ.
There is no perfect answer. He tells Luke that Anakin is dead so the dialogue works there. Dialogue doesn’t need to explain Obi leaving, he does not because that’s who he is.
If an edit was to be attempted that gave Obi-Wan a more explicit reason NOT to kill Vader; could Obi-Wan sensing Luke in danger not be used? Bring Obi-Wan’s visions of Luke’s peril further forward, so that he senses this soon after Vader is defeated and so rushes away more immediately after their duel? It would probably entail losing the “So long, Darth” line - which is shame!
But the whole drama with Luke is just so nonsensical and, arguably, canon-breaking. And Reva’s redemption for having spared Luke is unearned. None of it works, and I feel like it’s all more offensively bad than Obi-wan sparing Vader’s life—especially since it is conceivable that Obi-Wan would spare his life.
I agree I never want to see that half of Episode 6 ever again. It just does not make sense from a canonical POV.
Is the way it is now perfect, no … does it work, yeah.
Hi Anjohan,
the project looks very good.
First of all, sorry for my English, it is not my primary language.
For Leia’s escape I think a scene of some elevator to connect the underwater base with the surface drug lab would be appropriate.
This is just a test. Perhaps it is not the most appropriate elevator and not the best quality, but I think the scene flows better.
It’s just an idea.
https://streamable.com/98vp9i
I think the lighting needs to be changed to match (that greenish tint), but I like a lot to add that they are in an elevator. The question I have is does he do the elevator after he “steals the card” or before? I almost feel after. So elevator scene happens right before Leia and Obi come out on top.
I almost think that elevator in reverse at the opening with Haja over the communicator may be better as a transition from door to elevator to Obi in water. On the way out, we as an audience will automatically assume they use the same elevator out, so need to show again.
Anjohan, the movement and lighting in the new scene are both great. The issue with the Leia in your last scene is she just pops up. You are having a reverse perspective problem. Obiwan starts larger and gets smaller as he moves away. Leia pops up small and gets a little larger. I would match her to a relevant spot on Obi’s back so perspective stays more consistent. Otherwise, I am really being sold that she is with him which vastly helps the scene.
I watched your edit and while I wanted to love it:
Did you trim down the oddities of episode 5 where the door was blown up, then up again? It always felt weird that Obiwan is told to be brought out and then brought right back. Why not just keep him out?
New dialogue ducking features in Premiere Pro
^ That one cost money. Found one tho’ (thanks to you). This took me an agonizing 90 minutes. Here you go:
-> Added some (fake) shadows as she walks
-> Added some (fake) light as she walks
-> and my favorite thing in life; rotoscoping (yeah, that was a joke)My brain is too used to it now to evaluate the overall impression, but I’d say it works as long as I desaturate her a little bit more (she looks very red, but it’s mostly the compression - looks fine in HD) and you you don’t stare at it like it’s the center of attention (which we now do).
Come with ideas on how to possibly improve, if it does not work for any of you.
I like the idea a lot.
I am being nitpicky (some of this could be as you said compression), but the idea helps sell the whole scene for me that he isn’t alone leading to the door opening scene.
https://www.shutterstock.com/video/clip-1031709821-shot-behind-confident-ambitious-walking-on-night
Color correct and change size?
Yes, it’s supposed to be dialogue carried over from the previous dialogue scene as it does in the original. It is not supposed to be intercom here.
I’m decent in After Effects, but I don’t have the program on this laptop unfortunately, so my effects work is limited. However, I do use Unreal Engine and would perhaps be able to create VFX from there. How so?
A shadow on the door is a good idea. Footage definitely not done, so this is the type of suggestions I need.
We did intercom underwater in one of the previous clips (it’s quoted up above or previous page somewhere) but two or three thought it would be stupid or broke the flow of Haja communicating with him underwater. I was not one of them though, and could definitely re-do it as intercom dialogue.
General
Also, yes, I can and will add more character flashbacks when Obi-Wan is trapped underneath all the rubble. I’ll also update the first post with fresh video links for those who have missed out.
Do you think it’s possible to add top of Leia’s head next to Obi walking?
As to the intercom, I think it may work now with the longer time between seeing Haja and the water
Thank you, lads and gals. Once you seal the entrance I think it is easier to seal the exit (as far as believability goes), but if you seal both - then we’re definitely at a good place.
Video Update
Here’s the updated Entrance and Exit, with alterations suggested by you community members:
The idea here is to remove the underwater communication (as a few of you didn’t like), and to improve the character and motivation of Haja. So their dialogue continues as we transition to Obi-Wan following Haja’s instructions, down and into the sewers/underwater.
Here’s the updated Escape, with a new door and a few tweaks (door needs to be adjusted and probably a little slower):
#Jedit: I’ll respond to posts up above soon. Need a break.
Is the idea to have Haja giving voice over or talking over comms? If over comms, could add some static effects and reduce range. Haja over the comms while Obi is on land, then silence once he hits the water might really work.
How good are you at after effects? Was wondering if you could take a red rain jacket and have it like Leia is following Obi out? That could make a more convincing exit with Leia. Did you add the door? Looks good, but may need a slight shadow from Obi walking out masked just in the door for a second.
How’s this idea?
In the beginning of the film when Obi-Wan decides to give Luke the toy, we cut in the last part of the series where Obi-Wan approaches Luke and says “Hello there!”. We then hear Owen’s voice “I thought I told you to leave us” etc and cut to a suitable shot of Owen at the homestead. “Walk with me”, then wipe to the “He must be trained/Like you trained his father” scene (perhaps change background to suggest they are still somewhere else on the farm). We don’t see the toy being returned, so it’s implied Luke still has it. Then obi-Wan continues his adventure, and we don’t see the Lars family again…
Until, at the very end after saying bye to the Organas at Alderaan, we cut back to Obi-Wan packing up his cave. He rides his animal… and we then see him check on the farm with binoculars (scene taken from first episode). He sees Luke playing pilot, implied to be because of the toy he got at the beginning. Obi-Wan then rides away and meets QGJ.
Thoughts?
This would of course means losing the “battle” of the Lars homestead entirely, but if Reva dies by Vader’s hand it’s ok anyway
1000000% this. This isn’t Luke’s story with Ben, it’s Leila’s. The less he is in it, the better.
@Anjohan: I’m looking so forward to your edit(s), I cannot tell. All your alterations make more sense then the original edit.
Here some ideas of mine:
The last duel:
- Will you keep the line of Vader saying: “Did you come to defeat me?”, it was him following Obi Wan, wasn’t it? So IMO it makes not much sense .
- Obi Wan makes three rolls in the whole duel. One would be enough
- Obi Wan holds his lightsaber two-handed behind his back and waits long enough until Vader hits him in the face. Is that, what a Jedi would do?
- Vader using the force to crack the ground and burying Obi Wan with rocks is also a little too much, why is there hollow ground anyway? Obi Wan could have some flashbacks of Luke, Anakin, Padme (Leia, too, if needed) during the fight to gain his full strength again, the burying is not necessary.
- Maybe Obi Wan saying: “Goodbye, Darth!” is a little too cheesy?
The Inquisitors:
- Let Reva don’t talk at all! Would make her more threatening than always yelling around.
Take all the time you need to make the edit you want to make.
I love the hollow ground scene, it’s just too cool to cut.
love the idea of padme, Anakin, maybe qui-gon introducing young Anakin or asking him to train the boy
I love the goodbye Darth line because it connects well to ANH when obi calls vader Darth
asking a lot to remove all of reva’s lines, but the less she talks the better. I like her arch and I like the actress, she just talks so dang much
Too much to bother to list what I’ve done. Tell me if we’re getting near something or not.
Not finished product.
#Jedit: Uploaded right one.
I like it, I understand it’s not finished but I can definitely see with the finishing touches how it’ll flow and I think works great!
Quick question: from a post above you were mentioning that you could be looking at lowering the music a bit in the mix and raise it as the movie goes. What were you thinking of using for that?
I’m a mixing engineer, and the only thing I can think of that would help is running through Dialogue Isolate from iZotope - not sure if you were thinking of other techniques?
I can’t do quick turnarounds, but can do some work during weekends in case you need some dialogue isolated or something else cleaned/fixed 😃
Premiere has dialogue isolation features
Too much to bother to list what I’ve done. Tell me if we’re getting near something or not.
Not finished product.
#Jedit: Uploaded right one.
Pacing is quite nice.
Sent pm.
I do disagree with the final fight feeling like a tv fight. I found it a far better fight than rots or rotj. Each to their own.
Was it answered if you were doing a crawl?
I hope not. If this is going to be like the other “Star Wars Story” films the crawls should just be left for the Skywalker Saga films.
For me … every Star Wars movie should have the crawl. No biggie though, I will add in myself if need be.
Was it answered if you were doing a crawl?
On the opening and alternate rescue….
Redundant, but there will always be people who will disagree with your choices, so may as well make the one you want. If you like the standard rescue, go with it. If you can make the alternate rescue work in a way that makes you happy, go with that one.
TBH, I’m not a huge fan of how this whole sewer thing is working out. Also not a big fan of the music change during the final duel as well. But, that’s just me.
What do you think is not working? I ask because say you saw this for the first time … what is and is not working?
Well, for starters, I think the shots of the “fish” in the tanks is kind of weird and off putting. They just seem like they’re arbitrarily there. I feel like the beginning of the sewer section would be better if it just goes from Kenobi checking out the doorway to underneath the city and then it cuts to him swimming.
I also don’t think communicators work underwater so hearing Kumail talk to Obi-Wan while he’s swimming is also something I’m not a fan of. Maybe have him talking in Obi-Wan’s ear through the communicator while he’s checking out the door to establish that’s the doorway to the underbelly of the city and leads into the sewer system of the building that Leia is being held up in.
Another nitpick I have, which I will admit is something that Anjohan can’t really do anything about is the clothing discrepancy between the two scenes. The whole disguise thing of Obi-Wan and Leia when they leave the doorway works since you’d think they’d have to change after swimming back. But the clothing he wears in both of these scenes is vastly different and causes some continuity errors.
And finally… I’m just not a fan of putting this rescue so early in the series on a conceptual level. I think someone else already kind of said this but having him go full Jedi action hero to rescue Leia really undercuts the moment later in this episode where he uses the Force for the first time to save her when she falls off the building. I can honestly tell it’s a tricky situation since this is one of only a handful of big action moments in this series in an episode that’s entirely superfluous. But personally speaking, if I had the choice between just cutting everything from the Nur rescue or trying to implement key moments from it into the second episode, I would go with the former.
I feel like https://streamable.com/ngan0x is vastly superior to the mud that the writers made us trek through in the show. Well done! The only small off-putting thing in the episode is how the lightsabers didnt feel like lightsabers and felt like rods instead of plasma/lasers.
I felt something was off as well, just couldn’t put my hand on what it is.
TBH, I’m not a huge fan of how this whole sewer thing is working out. Also not a big fan of the music change during the final duel as well. But, that’s just me.
What do you think is not working? I ask because say you saw this for the first time … what is and is not working?
I would love a link
The ending feels weird from the closed door to them coming out. Makes sense, but a tad rushed. Is there an elevator scene? Is there a scene (maybe inquisitors looking for them) that you can break away to before coming back to them?
Are you keeping the tombs in the base?
…