Vultural

After The Wedding - 2006 - 6/10
AKA - Efter Brylluppet

Social worker Jacob, seeking more funding to keep the orphanage going, goes to Denmark.
Indeed, that is part of the potential donation, so this is a summons to ask in person.
Once there, he is invited to a wedding, and he spies an old flame.
From then on, revelations surface at a steady pace.
The story is heavy on character development, motivations, and well meaning intentions.
Camerawork includes many extreme closeups, capturing expressions and gestures.
Note: Hollywood offered an attempt in 2019, casting attractive actors.

My Hot Property - 2016 - 5/10

Sleek, sexy corporate spy quaffs drugs by the crate and plays squitzy with fried brain boyfriend.
Then she falls behind in the rent in uber pricey London and buyers circle.
Movie follows her combative campaigns to hold onto her accommodations.
Meant to be a comedy, perhaps an edgy satire, this is low on laughs, high on stupid.
Asinine situations, moronic characters, as enticing as soggy pizza with mushy noodles.

I was finishing Green Book #10, an all Dunsany issue.
Though the focus of this issue was Lord Dunsany’s fantasy œuvre, my favorite article was a reminiscence by Katharine Tynan, and that informed my decision regarding what to read next.

Tynan, Katharine - The Death Spancel

*

Traditional, wonderful ghost stories, with vivid descriptions and rich word use.
The second wife is already taking command of the home, and has borne two children to her husband. “The First Wife,” cold and long buried, still abides, sensed by a faithful family pet.
Faithful love of another sort is ensnared by a binding spell in “The Death Spancel.”
“A Bride From The Dead” and “The Body Snatching” both delve into the unpleasant business of graverobbing.
Possession, another version, occupies “The Ghost,” as the spirit of a bankrupt family, forced to sell their ancestral manor, troubles a male guest.
“The Dream House” presents a delightful variant on a haunting.
For fans of pure horror, “A Night In The Cathedral” delivers the goods. Love and adventure, blood and steel.
Peter Bell provides a lengthy and thoughtful introduction. Throughout, scattered poems act as interludes.
This is a great book from Swan River, and an essential edition to titles in the “Mistresses Of The Macabre” sphere. Rest easy, Richard Dalby, this latest entry is a worthy addition.

• “The Ghost” from Illustrated Sporting And Dramatic News (Dec 1905)
  Illustrated by F.H. Townsend

Martin’s Close - 2019 - 5/10

Idle gentry wastrel, George Martin, stands accused of murdering a simpleton, Ann Clark.
The story plays out in courtroom testimony and flashback.
Written and directed with a slight camp style, which I don’t think works.
Brief, slight, and I had heard enough mutterings to assume it would disappoint.
At 30 minutes, this goes down like a half empty packet of stale crisps, and is unsatisfying.

Magic Mike - 2012 - 6/10

Energetic remake of 1981’s Ladies Man, with a dose of Tony Manero and The Village People.
One does not expect plot here, and there was little. Little sleaze as well.
The gents were very buff, the dance routines little more than M Jackson’s crotch grab.
Not much effort there, I’m afraid.
For a better, more fun, film about male strippers, track down the guys calling themselves Hot Metal.
The Full Monty.

The Beauty’s Evil Roses - 1992 - 5/10
AKA - Se Jiang II Zhi Xie Mei Gui // 色降II之血玫瑰

Wildly insane Hong Kong Cat III film of kidnapped girls, magic spells, lesbian action, penis snakes, machine guns, motorcycle gangs, kung fu, nudity, spawning, handcuff lovin’, sleazy music …
Girls are indoctrinated into an evil queen’s entourage.
Disobedience or failure is punished by whippings, spanking and spell magic.
Hard to tell what the motivations are of anyone, aside from police and a brother searching for his sister.
The editing is jarring and haphazard. Music is not even faded between scenes. Chop chop chop.
Conflicts (gunfire - incantations - slappings) are intercut with long stretches of nudity and mattress action.
Legendary film that I somehow never saw in the 90’s when I was so obsessive over HK films.
I think was expecting more, or at least better cutting.

Sputnik - 2020 - 6/10

Two weeks in orbit, and two cosmonauts are returning to earth.
During the descent, however, some “thing” climbs onto their capsule … then inside.
Back on earth, the now-lone surviving cosmonaut is placed under military quarantine / detention.
Dark SciFi thriller borrows from other movies, but it does proceed in unexpected directions.
The Hollywood formula is avoided, thus much of the narrative is unpredictable.
That said, security at the isolated base is terribly lax at times, to the point where I’m asking “where are the guards?”
Owing to references to Yuri Andropov, I’d guess this was set in the early 1980’s.

The Words - 2012 - 6/10

Oft visited premise of struggling young writer discovering an unpublished manuscript by accident.
Then, submitting the pages as his own, he receives acclaim and awards.
Film guises plot with device of story within another story.
Nice looking - predictable.

The History Of Christianity - 2009 - 6/10

Six part series on the early years, spread, and diversity of one of the planet’s youngest religions.
For me, the first three episodes were the most enjoyable:
The earliest beginnings, pagan Rome going Catholic, Eastern Orthodoxy.
After that, the Protestant schism, missionary work in the New World, Pentecostal in Korea.
Conquistadors? Inca, Aztec, Maya? Massacre, what are you talking about?
None of that mentioned.
Oxford history don, Diarmaid McCullough, is an engaging host, but he is more guarded and careful in his thoughts and presentations as the series progresses.
The energy steamed away.

This Is Spinal Tap - 1984 - 11/10

First and finest of the Rockumentary - Mockumentary genre.
One brilliant moment after another.
“This goes to 11.”

The Mystic Nativity (The Private Life Of A Christmas Masterpiece) - 2009 - 7/10

Well done documentary on Botticelli’s long hidden / forgotten painting of the birth of Jesus.
The composition is explained, as well as period events that influenced it.
Chief among those, the revolutionary preaching of Girolamo Savonarola.
One of Botticelli’s final works, he works with revolutionary new mediums, canvas and oils.
Then there is the history of the painting itself. How it came to be lost, then purchased for a song.
Informative, never dry, with enthusiastic presenters.
The above image is only the top portion.

The Art Of Negative Thinking - 2006 - 6/10
AKA - Kunsten åtenke Negativt

Weekly, monthly meeting of paraplegic support group arrives at home of newest member.
Much to his resentment, resistance, and dismissive scorn.
They are, indeed, a bubbly mix with their optimistic credos and motorized wheelchairs.
Viewers might be forgiven for hating them almost as quickly as the infuriated homeowner does.
They roll in anyway, and he immediately begins to shred the smiling facades.
Black comedy holds back way too much.
Feels like a play, stage bound and talky. (Note: on the boards in 2010)
Yeah, what was I expecting? Dancing? Synchronized swimming?
From Norway.

Lord Of Tears - 2013 - 4/10

Artsy horror charges from the gate, takes a wrong turn midway, gimps to the finish.
Scottish teacher inherits city house, plus a stately manor house, and a parental warning to “never go to the manor.”
Sooner than you can suggest he sell, he returns to the country.
Opening packed with moody imagery, black n white stills, turbulent clouds, all artfully sequenced and underlaid with an evocative score.
Much of the look is reminiscent of Stephen Clark which really hooked me.
Twenty minutes in, an American female appears and the story grinds to a stop.
The girl cannot act, her character annoys, and one wonders why the director kept her. US demographic?
Seriously, one could discard 75% of her screen time and the film would be better for it.
Oh yeah, there is also a character with a booming voice, wearing a dinner suit and an owl head.
Disappointing because Tears began so well, though it might have been a one-note tale.

The Cry Of The Owl - 1987 - 6/10
AKA - Le Cri du Hibou

Depressed over an impending divorce, Robert starts observing a young woman at night.
He’s not exactly stalking, she simply seems so happy he enjoys the vibe as it washes over him.
Juliette catches him, however, calls him out. Then invites him inside.
He has assumed, because of her smile, she was well-adjusted.
Too late, he finds himself entangled in her moods and obsessions, and activates a malevolent pair.
Layered tale of deception, self-deception by Chabrol based on a Patricia Highsmith novel.
Superior to 2009 remake which suffered gaps in plotting.

The Cry Of The Owl - 2009 - 5/10

Peculiar thriller, with absurd plotholes and unanswered questions.
Troubled man, going through a divorce, begins peeping on single woman living in isolated woods.
She catches him, invites him inside. They talk. Two beats later, she now stalks him!

Complications ensue.
At one point a character disappears. Where to? How?
The film feels unfinished. Characters are barely more than empty cartoons.
There is no understanding of any relationship, let alone a single character’s behavior.
Felt like 15 minutes of plot were shaved. From Patricia Highsmith novel.

The Party - 2017 - 7/10

As in, dinner party from hell.
After her elevation to a ministerial post, Janet invites family and close friends to help her celebrate.
Everyone brings knives. Well, no, one carries a handgun.
Depending on how you feel about dinner parties, this is either a talky bore or a delicious banquet.
Very theatrical, with perhaps three stage sets, this feels like a play.
Kristin Scott-Thomas and Patricia Clarkson bolster a diabolical cast.
Dialogue is brittle black and venomous, and pacing is perfect.
I laughed throughout and enjoyed thoroughly.
Then again, I hate dinner parties.

Doll & Em: S02 - 2015 - 5/10

Sad to say I watched all of this, as well as S01.
Six episodes of chick angst. Dolly and Emily hole up in a lighthouse and write an autobiographical play.
Mikhail Baryshnikov provides the local Broadway theatre. Ewan MacGregor is Ewan MacGregor.
Evan Rachel Wood and Olivia Wilde read the stage roles of Dolly and Emily.
Yes, stars are piling on to this brittle, uncomfortable comedy.
Dolly is even more passive aggressive than before, while Emily plays victim to the hilt.
Characters test their friendship and viewer patience with their thoughtless behavior.
Episode with Virginia Woolf is a standout.
Self abasement along the lines of The Trip series.
An acquired taste.

The Trip To Spain - 2017 - 6/10

Another in the series of “Trip” movies from Steve Coogan and Rob Brydon.
As characters, they are growing on me. Mind you, they continue to play scripted versions of themselves.
Anyway, this time they go to Spain to bicker and bait each other.
Gourmet food is an afterthought in this encapsulation of the series.
Meals might have more time in actual episodes, but this duo works better for me in small doses.
An acquired taste, though ruminations of aging and fleeting fame are slyly presented.

View From A Blue Moon - 2015 - 5/10

Surfing “documentary” focusing on tube and curl specialist John John Fletcher.
J J and friends catch waves across the globe, in what comes across as vanity project.
The limited narration is akin to “See John surf,” “Go, John, go,” “Wave, John.”
Slick, 4K photography, yet editing is so brisk one cannot study technique for more than five seconds.

I live with someone who likes adventure docs (surf, climbing) and I have seen more than I care to recall.
Pretty camerawork aside, this one is piffle.
For classic surf films, watch the Endless Summer trilogy.
For big wave surf, Bilabong Odyssey or Riding Giants, and, if you can find it, Biggest Wednesday: Condition Black. Fifty footers.

Face-Maker - 2010 - 5/10
AKA - フェイスメーカー

Plastic surgeon who used to work for the US Witness Protection Service now changes faces for the desperate.
The only price “… is your old face!”
Unhappy or on-the-run souls find the black market “Face-Maker” and persuade him to “rebirth me!”
New identity = problems solved. Sometimes … sometimes not.
Half hour, single shows. Mid-episode, the surgeon finds the patient and gives them a -
“So how’s it going?” speech, followed by, “Oh, by the way, I just sold your old face."
Late night J-doramas usually air midnight or later. Many are dreck, a few very good, this is middling.
Low production values, generic plots, acting fair to amateur.
Non-demanding time waster.

Despite my shrug of a review, I, nevertheless, reworked existing subtitles for this show.
Steamlined dialogue, Westernized grammar, fixed tense errors.
Full credit given to original subber.
My subs can be found -
http://www.addic7ed.com/show/6671
or
https://subscene.com/subtitles/face-maker

Cockneys Vs Zombies - 2012 - 6/10

Guess the title says it all.
East End construction crew finds underground vault sealed in 1666.
Hmmm … let’s open it!
Next thing you know, a gang of bank robbers are fighting the undead who have surrounded an old-aged pensioners home.
Features Alan Ford, Richard Briers, Honor Blackman (!).
Also the very catchy pub song,

♪ We’re going head to head
♪ With the undead.
♪ You can fill 'em full of lead
♪ But they won’t stay dead. ♫

Lucy Worsley’s 12 Days Of Tudor Christmas - 2019 - 7/10

For traditionalists such as myself, the Yule season is about to conclude. For others, the tree hit the curb December 25.
Historian Worsley offers a day after day exploration of the season that starts on 25 December – not mid-October.
So much is completely lost now. Lord Misrule, house mummers, Saint’s days, though the heavy food and vast quantities of alcohol consumption have survived.
Us commoners only receive exposure for the first few days, then focus shifts to the court of Henry VIII.
Banquets, splendid gifts, opulent costumes. Likely this is where Worsley’s passion lies.
For a more down to earth view, watch the Christmas episode of Tudor Monastery Farm (2013) with Ruth Goodman, Peter Ginn and Tom Pinfold.

Love Is All You Need - 2012 - 6/10
AKA - Den Skaldede Frisør

Young couple (English - Danish) opt to marry at his family villa in Italy.
Girl’s mother, recovering from cancer therapy, discovers husband shtupping a flexible replacement.
Boy’s father still has not gotten over his wife’s death.
Surely they will be too preoccupied to take note of each other.
Add coastal scenery, breezy directorial style, light comic touches.
OK date night flick in Danish and Italian, though Mr Brosnan speaks English throughout.

Linda Ronstadt: Live Hollywood - 1980 - 6/10

After watching a feel-good, empty documentary from 2019, I pulled out the concert video.
Linda dominated the airwaves in the late 1970’s and this show caught her just after she passed the peak.
Manager Peter Asher had shifted musical gears on her again, moving her into “Modern Rock.”
Alas, Linda was never a full bore rocker. She did not have the voice for it.
When she pours on the volume, her tone narrows and becomes strident.
Other songs, such as the haunting “Faithless Heart,” she vanishes into the poetry of the lyrics.
That said, her voice disturbed me, so I dug out other concert videos - 1974 - 1976, where her tone was still spectacular.
By and large, she has disowned her “classic” rock era, when she fronted a wall of guitars.

http://ronstadt-linda.com/artrs95.html

Roald & Beatrix: The Tale Of The Curious Mouse - 2020 - 6/10

Lightweight holiday trifle, though let me not dissuade you, good soul.
After the death of his father, and beloved sister, young Roald withdraws deeper into his books.
Before deciding to run away and visit his hero, Beatrix Potter,
Potter, meanwhile, has struggles of her own.
The newest book is not coming along so well. Her publisher wants “softer” stories for coddled children.
Worse, she needs spectacles!
Their stories interweave, until – Aha! the singular encounter.
Filmed during the 2020 Covid pandemic, the film is expertly shot and composed; a wonderful class for those studying the techniques of cinematography.