Vultural

Sharknado 4: The 4th Awakens - 2016 - 3/10

The perils of living with shark enthusiasts …
One might think this stale franchise went belly up a couple installments earlier.
As long as has-beens line up for cameo immortality, and suckers tune in, it’ll go one forever.
Bigger, noisier, with almost nonstop action, and countless human dinners.
This ‘nado spirals out of Las Vegas, twists eastwards, through Texas, up tornado alley into Kansas.
Aside from cameos, this is sprinkled with iconic references to better films.
I’d say avoid, assuming you control the remote.

Sharknado 3: Oh Hell, No! - 2015 - 4/10

Unfortunately, most members of the household are really into this series.
Each installment, apparently, has a greater budget, indicated by improved effects and photography.
Also dozens of cameos, probably working for nothing or scale.
What is slipping away is heart and goofy humor, replaced by winking calculation.
Attempts are made at explaining the “sharknado effect,” which indicates numerous future installments.
Concepts remains the same. Sharks in twisters, culling stupid members of society who can’t find shelter.
If you bought Jamie Foxx as bazooka shootin’ President in one film, you will have no problem with Mark Cuban as President here.

Sharknado 2: The Second One - 2014 - 3/10

Was this film really necessary?
I suppose.
C’mon, you have two tornadoes approaching Manhattan. Both filled with sharks!
(never dolphins, piranha, goldfish, surfers).
Plus a giant snowstorm! (no bears, wolves or hockey goalies, alas)
Add has-beens and dubious celebrities (Judd Hirsch, Kelly Osbourne, Billy Ray Cyrus, Downtown Julie Brown, et al)
What’d ya got? 90 minutes of labored stupidity.
Better budget than the first film, though this more self-conscious and tries too hard.
The hero remains dumber than a biscuit. Film introduces his still-smokin hot high school flame.
He prefers the ole divorced face.
I’m yelling at the screen, “Jump hottie! Dump botox!”

Sharknado - 2013 - 3/10

To paraphrase a Spinal Tap review.
Sharknado = Sh!tnado.
Hurricane slams into Santa Monica, after having sucked hundreds of sharks into its whirlwinds.
Flying sharks apparently have no problem breathing air, and they bite off limbs and heads of passing humans.
Streets fill with water, even in the hills of Beverly Hills, and sharkies swim from living rooms to dining rooms to … dine!
Terrible acting, awful script, mindless direction, crapo music, especially bad CGI.
Followed by sequels.
John Heard uncannily resembles Brian Wilson. Other producers should have picked up on that.

Matrix Revolutions: Epic Edition - geminigod

I put off viewing partly because I did not want to waddle through sorry assed Revolutions again.
Then I delayed reviewing because I wanted to listen to Geminigod’s audio commentary.

In a nutshell, the A/V editing was spectacular. I missed glitches and fudges he referenced in the commentary.
Had to go back, and even then they were often hard to catch.
He wisely purged the bulk of the inane bungles from Revolutions.
Also, he made a good argument that the sequel ought to have been one long film, rather than two.
Best, this edit redeemed the franchise (which seems due to revive).

Less compelling, were Geminigod’s prolonged defense for the importance of Zion. I never bought that argument. Zion, to me, represented a separation of humanity into elites and mudbugs. Far as Zion went, if the machines whacked them, fine by me.

Commentaries by their nature are enlightening, thoughtful, and maddening. Geminigod’s was no exception. For every point he addressed, and I thought “Ooh, I hadn’t thought of that,” then he would belabor another cue for five minutes, and I’m going, “Hey, Pilgrim, movie’s rolling, stay on topic.”

This really was a powerhouse job, with a tremendous amount of editing and rearranging, in crafting a true, alternative experience.
And barking aside, I truly appreciated the editor’s words. Most enlightening.

Time Waits For No One (The Girl Who Leapt Through Time) - TM2YC

Part of the Time travel Consecution, this is a haunting, at times perplexing, love story.
I watched it three times, to get the feel of the story, because this is rather messy.
Other reviews have suggested this be even shorter, but that might prove a jumble.
This is tucked away on the DVD. Don’t over look it. A small gem, worth your time.

Apocalypto: The Legend Of Jaguar Paw - Sinbad

Mild trim of Mel Gibson’s naturalistic masterpiece, removing much of the dialogue.

Video - 1280 X 696p AVC. Image is razor sharp, cutting is excellent.

Audio - 512 kbps AAC 2 Channel stereo. Subs, limited. For a film such as this (big action, high adventure) I would have preferred 5.1 sound, I am not editing, however, and most editors choose stereo. Subs are more problematic. Sinbad has cut a swath of them. The film holds, as does the narrative. The remaining subtitles are poorly timed. Most are short, way too short. They should have been given a once-over in something like SubtitleEdit before hard coding.

Narrative - As mentioned earlier, the edit, despite heaving cutting, is coherent and straightforward, especially to those who have watched the original. Most trims passed by unnoticed, save for one at the end.

Enjoyment - Yes, though primarily as watching an exercise. The edit is well done, though I don’t see it as essential, or one that I would watch more than a few times.

Quantum Of Solace: Bond’s Revenge - Last Survivor

Really enjoyed this.
Much more character focused than the original.
Liked that overlong action sequences were trimmed.
Never bought the Vesper backstory, not in this, nor in the original.
Bond is a sexual predator, he would never get emotional about anyone.
Maybe M.
So when Vesper’s ghost appeared, I crinkled a bit.
That said, the video insets were nicely done. Slick.
To me, QS remains the weakest of the Craig 007s, but I enjoyed this far, far more than the original.

Killer Toon - 2013 - 7/10
AKA - Deo Webtoon: Yeogosalin // 더 웹툰 : 예고살인

Arresting mix of live action and manga panels.
Selected viewers of a web artist’s preview installment find life imitating art.
As characters in the strip live - or in this film - die, so do they. In the same, gruesome manner.

Police get involved, undecided whether the artist is culprit or pawn.
Then they begin trawling through the past.
Perhaps a bit too clever and convoluted for its own good, but rarely boring and beguiling throughout.
Enough in this to watch a couple times.

The Broken Butterfly - 1919 - 6/10

A composer, sojourning in the Canadian woodlands, meets a spirited maiden.
Orphaned, she lives with her bitter, scolding aunt and her faithful dog.
Love develops between the couple, he composes an orchestral work in her honor, and proposes.
The story is patchy, yet extends good twists, flashbacks and fateful encounters.
Lew Cody as the composer is fine, if made up to look too old.
Pauline Starke as Marcène lights up the screen. She is the reason to watch this early Silent.

Lorna The Exorcist - 1974 - 5/10
AKA - Les Possedees du Diable

No, Lorna is not an exorcist, but instead a female Mephistopheles.
She makes the devil’s bargain with down on his luck, impoverished Patrick.
Fortune, repute, happiness in exchange for his daughter once she turns eighteen.
Desperate - and childless - he agrees.
Nine months and almost eighteen years later, Lorna returns, ready to take possession.
Narrative is more linear and logical than the typical Jess Franco outing.
Sex sequences serve the plot - sometimes - and are not as clinically pornographic as other films.
Sideplot of one of Lorna’s discards (and Franco himself as psychiatrist) is pointless.
20 year old Lina Romay fine as the daughter up for grabs.

Invisible City: S01 - 2021 - 6/10
AKA - Cidade Invisível

First the mysterious death of his wife, followed by a body washing up on shore.
A body that seems human, but might also be a dolphin.
Eric, detective for the Environmental Police, investigates a small tavern and delves into a subculture of entities.
Episodes are steeped in Brazilian folklore, characters are differentiated, the pace percolates.

At the core, as so often. lies money. In this case, land, owned by the poor. Coveted by developers.
Seven episodes, roughly 35” each, meaning this could have been a fuller, richer experience.
The conclusion of S01, slightly unresolved, should satisfy commitment avoiders.
A second season is underway, though I suspect I won’t watch.

Dark City - 1950 - 6/10

Opening credits read, ‘Introducing Charlton Heston,’ but make no mistake, he is the star.
Weak faux noir from Paramount has Chuck, Jack Webb and Ed Begley fleecing a small time courier out of 5G he’s carrying for a larger, stronger mob.
The courier is soon whacked, and the easy score grows more dangerous.
Heston’s character meanders around from rat to shyster to sorta good guy.
Ex-girlfriend Lizabeth Scott sings three songs, which struck me as padding, unless she’s your kind of canary.
An OK enough drama, but if you want gloomy, fatalistic Noir, seek elsewhere.

United - 2011 - 6/10

Docudrama of Man U’s 1958 Busby’s Babies.
The young team dominates England’s pitch, journeys to Beograd for European matches.
Not really a football flick, as I had thought.
Conflict with league officials, technical issues on the aircraft, survivors bookmark the story.
This story is less well known outside England, and perhaps fading into memory now.
Characters, even those with major lines, are barely more than shades.
Actual turf action - none.
The visual image is too soft, and the color overly desaturated.

Berlin 1945: Diary Of A Metropolis - 2020 - 7/10
AKA - Berlin 1945: Tagebuch Einer Großstadt

Well done, three part WWII documentary that genuinely adds to the history.
One part sees Berlin bracing for the final Allied (Soviet) assault, another part the conflict, final third the occupation.
All told though voice actors reading from diaries, memoirs, letters, etc …
Ordinary Berlin residents, students, office workers, forced labor, doctors, journalists, soldiers from both sides.
Bolstered with photos of the writers, and a tremendous amount of unseen footage.
The tone is neutral, stoical, a trait often expressed by survivors
Again, this is one year, in one city, with multiple points of view. Essential for history types.

Alice Or The Last Escapade - 1977 - 7/10
AKA - Alice ou la Dernière Fugue

Alice Carroll walks out on her overbearing, preening, self centered husband.
The five minute intro featuring this grape munching prat will prove enough for any viewer.
Outside, rain pours in sheets, yet she hits the road heading - who knows where.
Her car breaks down, fortunately outside a manor house.
The elderly occupant and his butler make her comfortable for the night.

Next morning, things begin to slide. Faces, perceptions, even the narrow dirt lanes.
Walls rise, roads deadend, and unanswered questions perplex Alice in a surreal labyrinth.

The worst element of this haze filled, dreamlike mystery is the intrusive score.
The composer hammers down any subtlety with deafening climaxes.
Blame Charbrol for tolerating this, and yet credit him for casting Sylvia Kristel as Alice after she previously starred in two Emmanuelle films.

The Duchess - 2008 - 5/10

Surprise. Keira Knightley botches another costume drama.
This time she plays 17th century Georgiana Spenser, great-great-great – you know, of the Spenser family.
Tale of lady involved in politics and scandals, helped by great costumes and location sets.
As always, Knightley is simply too modern for such a part, showing her limited range of smirks, squints and pouts.
Everyone else is quite fine, notably Ralph Fiennes and Charlotte Rampling.
To be honest, females around me enjoyed this more than I.

One Deadly Summer - 1983 - 7/10
AKA - L’été Meurtrier

His younger brother tries to warn him. The girl is not right.
The older brother, dazzled, plunges ahead.
New family, with attractive daughter, moves into small village.
Eliane is drop dead gorgeous, and the rural Lothario’s quickly brag of bagging her.
Her interest goes to mechanic Fio, though her “hunter’s eye” is trained elsewhere.
Eliane has an agenda, of which locals are unaware, and viewers must guess.
Something to do with her family history, and a player piano.
She is also, as mentioned earlier, unstable.
Story is told by several narrators, from numerous points of view.
The director inserted random nude scenes and one odd mother/daughter moment that seem gratuitous.
Both leads are too old for their roles (Fio especially).
Problematic film still a must for sordid mystery buffs.

Best Offer - 2013 - 7/10
AKA - La Migliore Offerta

Intriguing arthouse mystery of greed, deception, obsession, fraud.
Accent on art house, as this takes place in the high end world of auctions and collectors.
Geoffrey Rush plays evaluator / owner of Sotheby’s type establishment.
He gets wind of an estate in a run down house.
Within are treasures.
A fabulously looking film that unfolds, quite literally, like a clockwork mechanism.
Russian doll story, as one level of the narrative is exposed, another is revealed.
Clues scattered in plain sight, snapping tight at the end.

The 60’s: The Beatles Decade - 2006 - 5/10

Marshmallow documentary charting the times and cultural impact of the 60’s, predominately England.
Despite title, few Beatles tunes (producers probably declined to buy the rights).
Aside from the Zombies (interviewed) most songs were by obscure groups (no, not Floyd), or they were mudleys that sorta sounded like a group or hit.
The history is chiefly pop culture and economy, fronted by talking head authors, including sourpuss Mandy Merck.
Five episodes, two years per, shallow overview may be alright for non demanding, non history buffs.
Nonetheless, one of the closing lines of the last episode haunts me –

"The 60’s was a period when democracy was a very powerful force. In the sense the guys at the top with money and power, the multi-nationals and so on, began to realize that the threat to their privileges and power wasn’t a Red Invasion, Russian invasion, but democracy itself.”
Tony Benn - Labour MP 1950-2001

Rich Hall’s Workin’ For The American Dream - 2018 - 7/10

American expat living in Britain, Mr Hall extols the mystery, history and misery of the so-called American Dream.
Hall is an acerbic satirist in the best tradition of Ambrose Bierce.
Work hard, work long, and one day you’ll reap your great reward.
Really? Do people still believe that? Or does Barnum’s jeer at suckers ring down the ages?
Most of Hall’s specials are essential viewing, whether you live in the USofA , or not.
This is 90 minutes of funny, vicious and uncomfortable.
Curiously, Rich skips from the 1950’s straight to the 1970’s, bypassing the 60’s.

May The Devil Take You - 2018 - 5/10
AKA - Sebelum Iblis Menjemput

Lesmana invites a priestess (sorceress, witch) into his home and makes a deal.
The price for fortune, however, will be souls. Plural.
Soon, prosperity. After his wife dies, he scores a trophy wife, an actress.
All things pass, though, and even fun times have their endings.
As this went on, viewing became a huge chore.
Nonstop screaming and bug-eyed terror
Knockoff horror may be OK for drive-in mavens.
Otherwise, this suggests Indonesian fright films are hitting a dry patch.

About Time - 2013 - 6/10

Upon his 21st birthday, Tim is informed males in his family have always been able to time travel.
Not go into the future, only the past. Only their own past, and even then there are a few restrictions which he discovers.
What he really has is a “reset switch.” Return to the near past, for example, and correct dating faux pas.
Warm, feel good movie from the folks who brought you Four Weddings and Love Actually.
Humor offset by sentimentality, bittersweet, and tragic moments.
For pure laugh out loud fare, this ain’t it.
That said, others around me who watched this did laugh out loud, teared up, and applauded at the end.
Members of other forums praised this to the sky.
Yeah, like I care. Once a curmudgeon …

Radio Days - 1987 - 8/10

Shimmering 40’s nostalgia. My go-to suggestion for people who say they don’t like Woody Allen films.
Tall tales and anecdotes from Old Time Radio’s golden age.
Interspersed with various members of a struggling Rockaway family.
Comic situations and laughs come fast and often, with tons of cameos (Tito Puente, Kitty Carlisle, Diane Keaton, Wally Schawn).
Likely the most personal of Allen’s films, or at least the most revealing of his childhood, and early years as a gag writer.
Highly exaggerated, to be sure, but packed with unforgettable moments.

Lady In White - 1962 - 6/10
AKA - White Lady // Vita Frun

Though listed and discussed at various Noir sites, this Swedish film is more a whodunit.
Reminiscent of creaky manor mysteries of the early 1930’s, with a dollop of Gothic.
Family and high placed associates gather for the reading of the will.
From delighted to disappointed to distraught.
Warnings are followed by corpses.
The large estate and grounds are a maze of back hallways, listening tunnels, and half glimpsed figures.
Music is a strange mix of combo jazz, wordless chorus and electronic.
Everyone is out for gain, nefarious business during late nights and in the nearby swamps.
Old fashioned, drawing room clichés, evident throughout, may be fun for fans of this type.