Hey Sky! Good to see you working to update the opening logos for the new edit. I have a few specific pieces of feedback for you; hopefully they'll be helpful.
From what I'm seeing, it looks like you're making good use of the Optical Flares and Element3D plugins. They're two of my favorites, and I use them a lot in my own work. However, as someone who uses them a lot, they were also easily recognizable to me -- especially the bevel style on the text, since it's one of the built-in presets in Element.
One of the great things about both of these plugins is how customizable they are. For example, instead of using the Element bevel preset on the text, you could build your own, especially using some metal or even stone textures. You could even try and make the material evoke Hoth for this edit, with some icy blue flares to match the aesthetic.
Speaking of the flares: I think they provide a great accent to your text, but you may want to consider making them look as though light is glinting off of the lettering, as opposed to seeing disembodied light-less flares floating in space behind them. This is especially true at the end -- if the text is going to fly away (and I agree with the others that the text should stay -- have the lights turn down and drown them in darkness rather than having them fly away. Otherwise, it leaves your audience unsettled, because it suggests there's more text coming), it's strange to see lens flares floating around without anything to cast the light, especially if there's nothing else coming after the text.
I hope this helps! Feel free to reach out to me directly if I can be of further assistance -- I'm even happy to render out a few ideas if it would serve the project. Let me know!