Jar Jar Bricks

I’ll have to read over what I’ve already got for that part. I believe it had a lot to do with her feelings of being alone and worthless on Jakku, which is at least somewhat related to what you’re talking about.

I know it wouldn’t be possible for only his prequel memories to be restored because in the later scene he recognizes Luke’s X-wing and realizes that doesn’t make much sense. So if we were to include his prequel memories getting restored it would have to be along with everything else. I suppose that also begs the question of why R2 didn’t give him those memories sooner over the past 50 years.

I concur.

I agree it sounds less jarring but that it also doesn’t have the right inflection. Honestly not sure if I prefer that or not.

Huh I don’t remember hearing that one before for some reason. It definitely has no audio issues except for the tone of his voice being slightly off.

I prefer the new version myself. Option B by a longshot. At this point the only way I can tell it’s been modified is if I have my speakers right next to my ear.

Both Neerb and Ed are right. From how I understand it, it’s for two reasons. First so that he doesn’t die in the fight against Rey. Second so that the most worthy of his Sithy spirit is the last one standing.

RogueLeader said:

Also, if Kylo Ren was trying to show Rey the power of the dark side, having her almost kill her friend with that power would probably have the opposite effect. At this point of the film, it probably would’ve made more sense for the story to demonstrate to Rey how the dark side can help her accomplish her goals. But can’t really do anything about that.

An easy patch for this would have been a single line from Kylo: “I can teach you to control your powers.”

Kylo still has a grudge against Chewie for blasting him. Yeah, it was warranted because he had just killed his best friend in the galaxy, but Kylo probably doesn’t see it that way. In his twisted thinking, he probably believes that Chewie has abandoned him like everyone else and hates his Wookie guts for it.

This could have been expanded on with the deleted scene involving Chewie’s torture. IMO, what would have been a perfect reveal in that scene would be if it’s shown that Chewbacca was aiming at his head for the killing blow after he killed Han but changed his mind at the last second. That would have been a stepping stone toward Ben’s forgiveness and his ultimate redemption.

Particularly with older actors it would likely be impossible to get a sufficient sample size for an AI to replicate. Even with modern day actors, you need a sizable pool of speech audio. Clearly Adam Driver had enough for his own library, but that’s not going to be the case with everyone.

Eh, it’s just a nosy old lady who probably remembers when Owen and Beru lived there.

EDIT: It’s also worth noting that having her ask “Rey who?” is meant to mirror the Aki Aki girl from earlier in the film (the one that asks for her family name).

I’m of the opinion that the alternate take solves most of the cringing in the scene.

I’d say it’s in a good place. The emphasis is on Luke Skywalker since he became a legend.

Once the Empire swooped in they made sure to brainwash the common folk to forget about the Jedi. So any prequel references in the Festival of the Ancestors wouldn’t make much sense

Right I was thinking about when a generation would die off (fitting since we’re talking about “ancestors”). You’re talking more about a new generation being born.

If I recall correctly, she looks a lot more like Palpy with those eyes. Kinda vampiric, too. Can’t wait to see the final product.

Hmmm that’s actually an interesting idea. Definitely ties into the name: “Festival of the Ancestors”. I do wonder if that might actually make the believability of the trio encountering this event even more ridiculous, however, lol. Since a generation of humans is like 70-80 years. Unless the event ran for like an entire year or something crazy like that.

As for the other part of your post, here are some things from each “generation” of Star Wars I’ve incorporated into this edit:

• The japor snippet plays a crucial role in Kylo’s transformation to Ben Solo
• Plagueis and his form of essence transfer factoring into how Palpy survived
• Rey’s father being a mutated/engineered clone like the Bad Batch
• Sith stormtroopers being clones of multiple templates with inhibitor chips (v2 change)
• Ben’s blaster on Exegol being a gift from Lando and forged with chromium from Naboo
• Endor from ROTJ as the moon the trio travel to instead of a new moon
• Luke Skywalker’s severed hand in Palpy’s citadel (v2 change)

I could go on but I think you get the point.

A rough draft of this project is now available. The most important changes to the overall story of TLJ are listed below (this is in no way a comprehensive changelog):

• Hux is more intimidating and has less moments which directly poke fun at him
• Subtle hints at Finn’s Force-sensitivity, Poe’s spice running, Rey’s lineage, and Palpatine being behind everything
• Greatly expanded upon Luke’s character. He gives more reasons why the Jedi should end, but at the same time isn’t disrespectful of his father’s legacy (the lightsaber). Generally speaking, the audience should relate better with him and find him to be more likeable.
• Kylo Ren still wants to finish what Vader started. He destroys his mask because Snoke says he is “unworthy” of it, and he doesn’t know if he deserves it. He believes following his grandfather’s legacy means destroying his master and the old ways in exchange for a familial dynasty (with Rey).
• Holdo believing there is the possibility of a spy on board is what prevents her from sharing information with lower-class personnel. Poe believes this is extreme.
• Lando Calrissian is the man with the red plom bloom. He isn’t part of the fight anymore because of his daughter being a stormtrooper (although this isn’t revealed until the next novel). He sets the Canto Bight children free at the end.
• Excised unnecessary information with Rose (since she doesn’t play a large role in the next story), along with the Fathier race through the city
• Expanded upon DJ’s belief system. He believes only the corrupt can win from war.
• Ben doesn’t intentionally destroy Luke’s temple, it is hit by a Force storm (from the comics)
• Expanded upon Rey and Kylo’s feelings of inadequacy and abandonment. They both fear not being good enough, so look for validation from others.
• Snoke didn’t bridge Rey’s and Kylo’s minds. Instead, it’s identified as something that either formed or revealed itself during the interrogation scene in TFA. Snoke is aware of their connection, using it to get Rey to him, but doesn’t know what exactly it is.
• Holocam droids capture Luke’s final stand for the entire galaxy to witness on the HoloNet. This includes a new scene on Canto Bight where the gamblers consider the war to be simply a game worth betting on.
• Made the lightspeed ram more believable by explaining why it worked in this situation but not others
• Finn gets a final confrontation with Phasma that is more fulfilling. It’s based on the deleted scene where he reveals Phasma took down Starkiller’s shields. This leans into the “stormtrooper rebellion” idea.

Leave a message here or PM me if you’d like a look at it.

Even the title of the movie would make you think that the name of Skywalker is what is making people rise up.

I know hindsight is 20/20, but like, why the hell didn’t they come up with this lol.

PM sent!

The first sentence of the crawl “Flames of Rebellion burn across the galaxy” gets the point across from the get-go. Then I had Hux mention on Mustafar that they’re losing control over countless worlds and Kylo is wasting their time (I changed this since v1 because I didn’t want to repeat the crawl word for word). Then the only reason Kylo “agrees” to go along with Palpy’s games is because he knows he needs the fleet and troops to send a message to the galaxy not to mess with the FO. I had him think to himself that they’ve lost control over key systems since Crait.

Obviously then there is also the puppet show on Pasanna, which shows how much the story of Skywalker means to people. And all of Kijimi is in a similar rebellion, as evidenced by my addition of teens that graffiti a portrait of Luke from Crait (which makes even more sense now that Crait was recorded with HoloNet holocam droids in my TLJ edit).

So yeah, they’re really not doing too great.

What about it? That happens when Palpy gets wrecked. Doesn’t completely collapse of course, otherwise Rey and Ben would die.

Already in this. Minus the fiery bits landing in the throne room.

Here is specifically what I’m talking about:

Something on the floor caught Kylo’s eye. He knelt, his gloved fingers closing on a pair of golden dice linked by a short chain.

As Kylo stared at them he sensed something else - a tremor in the Force, the prelude to a familiar connection.

He stared at Rey. She stared back at him, her gaze level and unafraid. There was no hatred in her eyes, but there was no compassion, as there once had been, either.

“Come back,” he begged, pushing the image of a little girl pleading with a ship bearing her parents away. “Please.”

Evidently, Rey didn’t appreciate the memory. He heard the sound of the Falcon’s door sealing shut as the connection was severed, leaving Kylo alone in the gloom with his father’s dice resting in the palm of his upraised hand. A moment later, they too faded and vanished.

Kylo felt empty inside. But then a mysterious voice from his childhood spoke directly into his mind.

Find me on Exegol.

I feel like that would be an even more direct threat than what I’ve already got.

Basically, I decided to do away with Kylo hearing a broadcast at the end and instead he hears a “familiar voice” from his childhood speak into his mind saying “Find me on Exegol”. This is extremely ambiguous, and it wouldn’t be revealed until the next novel that Ben heard Palpy’s voice in his head as a child.

Welcome back Testing. Yes, I was just about to release a rough draft this week. I wanted to make an overall changelog first, as I definitely fell behind on making those for each chapter.