Grand Admiral Thrawn

A little tongue-in-cheek, but…

Luke: “What are you most afraid of?”

Rey: “Myself.”

Luke: “Because you’re a Palpatine? Leia sensed it too, after I ascended…”

Rey: “She didn’t tell me. She still trained me…”

Luke: “Because she saw your spirit, your heart. Rey, some things are stronger than blood…”

NeverarGreat said:

Ghost Obi-wan told Luke about Yoda and Dagobah

I think the difference here is that it is assumed that Obi-Wan knew this before he died. Luke didn’t know about Rey and Palpatine until AFTER he died. I think the real issue is, are force ghosts omnipotent?

Double-post!

Maybe add the mind link sound effect when Kylo tries to read her mind, and when they are looking at each other during the lightsaber battle when Rey’s eyes change to the Sith eyes?

Just thinking…

• Redo Poe’s Illum line
• Maybe cleanup/redo Finn’s: “It’s the First Order, they’ve found us line.”
• An angry line for Poe about making the First Order pay after the destruction of the Hosnian System (helping to explain why they are continuing the assault)
• Potential line for Lor San Tekka (or Kylo) clarifying that it isn’t a map that Luke left to find him, but a map that leads to an ancient Jedi Temple where Luke may be, clearing up the confusion on why Luke would leave a map if he didn’t want to be found.
• Maybe some kind of line before Rey leaves to find Luke about starting an evacuation soon because the First Order is coming to D’Qar to counterattack.
• Any Leia exposition lines that could be on comms during the Starkiller X-Wing battle?
• A Maz Kanata line about having to leave soon to go settle a union dispute (TLJ connection)
• Over the loudspeaker at the Resistance base in the background “Rose Tico, please report to maintenance.”

I guess that opens the question as well… are there any other spots in TFA that could be improved with the use of an AI line? Mainly, to improve the changes this edit makes, or, to allow for better cohesion between the ST films.

Just skimmed V4. The new voices are seamless! Great work on V4, Hal! And a tremendous thanks to the community of OT for making this a worthy conclusion to the saga!

DZ-330 said:

The only spot/spots I could see it working would be from (1:51:47 - 1:51:52), so that gives us 4 secs for a quick Poe line.

Poe: “We need to make them pay!”

Pilot: “We just lost Red 1.”

Pilot 2: “We’re overwhelmed. What do we do it isn’t working?”

Pilot 3: “Black Leader, there’s a brand new hole in that Oscillator. Looks like our friends got in.”

Poe: “Red 4, Red 6, cover us… everybody else hit the target hard give it everything you got.”

---

Or, we could trim Pilot 3’s line since the camera cuts to the Oscillator midway through his line:

Pilot 3: “Black Leader, there’s a brand new hole in that Oscillator.”

Poe: “Let’s make them pay! Red 4, Red 6, cover us… everybody else hit the target hard give it everything you got.”

JarJar, had to track it down but I remember posting about that very thing before haha!

Jedi122 said:

I’m really curious, Ady. How did you manage to so seamlessly replace the Han in Carbonite mold with the one you created into the movie itself without using any CGI?

From what I’ve seen… recreating camera angles and lighting, plus intensive rotoscoping! Crazy stuff but it looks amazing when completed!

EPISODE VII
THE FORCE AWAKENS

It is a time of despair.
Luke Skywalker, sworn
to rebuild the legendary
Jedi Order, has vanished.

With the Jedi now facing
extinction, agents of the
evil FIRST ORDER have
risen from the shadows
of an Imperial fortress
to claim supremacy over
countless worlds beyond
the fragile New Republic.

Growing restless amid
endless debate, daring
Senators have secretly
commissioned the pilots
of a brave RESISTANCE
to find the last Jedi and
restore the light of hope
to the darkening stars….

I think this reads well…

EPISODE VII
THE FORCE AWAKENS

It is a time of despair.
Luke Skywalker, sworn
to rebuild the legendary
Jedi Order, has vanished.

Emboldened by the Jedi’s
absence, soldiers of the
evil FIRST ORDER have
risen from the shadows
of an Imperial fortress
to claim supremacy over
countless worlds beyond
the fragile New Republic.

With the Senate falling
into chaos, its daring
leaders have secretly
commissioned the pilots
of a brave RESISTANCE
to find the last Jedi and
restore the light of hope
to the darkening stars….

I like it.

Fair enough! Let’s mark this done! For real this time.

EPISODE VII
THE FORCE AWAKENS

It is a time of despair.
Luke Skywalker, sworn
to rebuild the legendary
Jedi Order, has vanished.

With the Jedi now facing
extinction, agents of the
evil FIRST ORDER have
risen from the shadows
of an Imperial fortress
to claim supremacy over
countless worlds beyond
the fragile New Republic.

Overwhelmed by this
emerging threat, daring
Senators have secretly
commissioned the pilots
of a brave RESISTANCE
to find the last Jedi and
restore the light of hope
to the darkening stars….

I’d like to see if we can imply it is only a few senators secretly supporting them if the third paragraph is open for revisions.

If anything, I think this is the only “tweak” that is possibly needed, only to make the First Order not seem as large, yet:

EPISODE VII
THE FORCE AWAKENS

It is a time of despair.
Luke Skywalker, sworn
to rebuild the legendary
Jedi Order, has vanished.

With the Jedi now facing
extinction, agents of the
evil FIRST ORDER have
risen from the shadows
of an Imperial fortress
to claim supremacy over
countless worlds beyond
the fragile New Republic.

Desperate for a hero to
help resolve this crisis,
the Senate has secretly
commissioned the pilots
of a brave RESISTANCE
to find the last Jedi and
restore the light of hope
to the darkening stars….

Let’s not reopen the crawl discussion unless Nev says so

How goes V4?

Merge them all into one run-on sentence 🤣

Ladies and gentlemen… we got it 😏👍

What’s next? 😄

I don’t want to lose “the last Jedi” 😄

Episode VII
THE FORCE AWAKENS

The galaxy is in despair.
Luke Skywalker, sworn
to rebuild the legendary
Jedi Order, has vanished.

With the Jedi now facing
extinction, agents of the
evil FIRST ORDER have
risen from the shadows
of an Imperial fortress
to claim supremacy over
all star systems beyond
the fragile New Republic.

Desperate to resolve
this threat, the Senate
has secretly authorized
brave pilots of a daring
RESISTANCE to find the
last Jedi and restore
the guardians of peace
to the darkening stars….

What a great opening line after this paragraph by the way 😉

Lor San Tekka: This will begin to make things right. I’ve traveled too far and seen too much to ignore the despair in the galaxy. Without the Jedi, there can be no balance in the Force.

You know I gotta take a stab 😄

EPISODE VII
THE FORCE AWAKENS

The galaxy is in despair.
Luke Skywalker, sworn
to rebuild the legendary
Jedi Order, has vanished.

With the Jedi now facing
extinction, agents of the
evil FIRST ORDER have
risen from the shadows
of an Imperial fortress
to claim supremacy over
all star systems beyond
the fragile New Republic.

Unable to end this crisis
without Luke’s guidance,
the Senate has secretly
authorized the pilots of
a brave RESISTANCE to
find the last Jedi and
restore the light of hope
to the darkening stars….

• Removed “crisis” in the first paragraph since there is also a “crisis” in the last paragraph
• Replaced the first “Jedi” in the third paragraph, and restored “the last Jedi”. I think it adds more to Luke’s character by clearly stating that they need his guidance to settle the conflict.

Not sure I am a fan of “dark” in the first line and then “darkening” in the last line.

The more I think of it too, as much as I’d like the crawl to have the New Republic secretly supporting the Resistance, it just clouds it up too much in exposition.

In the context of the Resistance being a militia, that already establishes they are separate from the “fragile New Republic”, and with the Leia deleted scene restored and Hux’s speech, I think it would be easily assumed for first-time viewers that Leia is getting some secret help from her friends in the Senate to fund the militia.

With that in mind, I suggest:

Amidst this rising threat,
only a daring militia
stands in RESISTANCE,
its brave pilots have been
sent across the galaxy
to find the last Jedi and
restore the light of hope
to the darkening stars….

I think this one reads well:

Amidst this rising threat,
leaders in the New Republic
have secretly aided a brave
and daring militia to stand
in RESISTANCE, sending its
pilots to find the last Jedi
and restore the light of hope
to the darkening stars….

And if you want to mention the fleet:

Amidst this rising threat,
the New Republic fleet
has secretly aided a brave
and daring militia to stand
in RESISTANCE, sending its
pilots to find the last Jedi
and restore the light of hope
to the darkening stars….

I agree JarJar. But very happy to say, I think we have a final contender!

I lied. @Nev, here is another one with some minor tweaks to the last version of paragraph 3 that you had:

EPISODE VII
THE FORCE AWAKENS

It is a time of despair.
Luke Skywalker, sworn
to reforge the legendary
Jedi Order, has vanished.

Emboldened by the Jedi’s
absence, soldiers of the
evil FIRST ORDER have
risen from the shadows
of an Imperial fortress
to claim supremacy over
all star systems beyond
the fragile New Republic.

Desperate to unite these
planets in RESISTANCE,
a brave militia, secretly
armed by New Republic
Leaders, has sent its
pilots in search of the
last Jedi, hoping to
restore peace and justice
to the darkening stars….