George Lucas Arrested for Withholding Original Star Wars Cuts
George Lucas was arrested early this morning in San Anselmo, California. According to sources, the arrest followed a dramatic standoff in which Lucas reportedly refused to hand over the unaltered film reels of the original Star Wars Trilogy to the National Film Registry before the preservation deadline.
One eyewitness claimed Lucas was seen shouting, “Only my vision matters!” as federal agents raided his home. Witnesses say authorities confiscated several film canisters labeled “Uncompleted – Version 1.2 – 60% of My Dream.”
When asked for comment, one officer muttered, “We also found a version where Greedo shoots first, second, and then apologizes afterwards.”
Law enforcement has declined to comment, but an anonymous source confirmed, “We had no choice. The Special Editions were getting out of hand.”
This story is developing…