GLogus

Why not put a brief pause in this line. Doing so makes it come across as if he’s saying it with more trepidation:

“Sir, about the girl. They say that she’s dangerous, that she has powers…like yours.”

And:

“Her powers are only beginning to awaken. The longer it takes to find her, the more dangerous she becomes.”

Too on the nose??

Or:

“She’s only begun to grasp the fullness of her powers. The longer it takes to find her, the more dangerous she becomes.”

I don’t like the piano version. Sad is not the intended tone of the scene. It is meant to be horrifying. Vader snapping that kid’s neck is one of the few genuinely shocking parts of the series. Obi wan is feeling terror, not sadness.

The Inquisitor giving a speech about Jedi compassion is cartoon-level villainy. The official narrative of the Empire is that it is hunting down the Jedi because they betrayed the Republic, not because they are too kind. This isn’t how governments (even evil ones) spread propaganda about their enemies.

They’ve leaned way too hard into making Obi-Wan look sad, pathetic, and lonely. I think it would actually be more powerful (and, in a way, more sad) if Obi-Wan retained a degree of optimism in the face of such a dire and hopeless situation. They are doing to Obi-Wan what they did to Luke in TLJ, but it happens to be even less fitting for Obi-Wan’s character, who is typically even more stoic and steadfast than Luke.

Leia’s character is just bad. Sure, Leia was sharp as a tack in the original trilogy, but she didn’t have genius level psycho-analytical skills. Just let her be a damn kid here.

I actually really like what you did with the Anakin scene. Maybe have the transitions be faster, like an eye blinking. They are after all looking at each other, …sorta (or at least sensing each other).

I really like all of the seeds of the rebellion scenes, and I think they fit nicely into your edit. I like the ambiguity that arises out of whether Padme means to reach out to Anakin or Obi Wan. I also like these scenes because they give Padme more to do, whereas in the theatrical cut, she’s reduced to a mere plot device.

I think your cut is really good. I think the pacing of the theatrical cut is already pretty good, so I personally don’t really think it needs to be sped up. The only exceptions are that the opening and the ending are a bit overlong. I think you have already done a fine job of tightening up the opening, but I suppose if something had to be sacrificed, I’d go after the ending. The stuff with Yoda communicating with Qui Gon and going to Dagobah seems extraneous.

But really, the edit is already very good.

My impressions of S01E01:
07:37 and 14:18 The music transition could use a little smoothing over.

16:07 The cut seems very abrupt.

18:58 The fade out seems too fast, again as if cutting to commercial break.

I think I would be a bigger fan of the fades you have included if they were actually a little more drawn out, i.e., you said you were using them as a reset/breather. I agree with that in principle, but it feels like they are just being used interchangeably. I honestly can’t really explain why they are pulling me out of the experience. All I can say is that, to me, it intuitively feels off.

I want to emphasize that I don’t have a good grasp on the challenges posed by the source material or editing process. I’m just giving you my “gut instinct” impressions strictly as a viewer.

I will end by saying that I did like the episode over all. I thought it had really good pacing and was very engaging.

Hi. Just watched S01E02. Here are a few notes:

At 01:55 there is a single frame (of guns firing) that appears to be flipped. Not sure what would have caused this error. Blink and you’ll miss it, but it’s there.

At 01:57 I’d say the shot of Grievous laughing is too abrupt and out of context—probably because we have not been introduced to him yet.
Seems unnecessary, too.

At 06:36 the fade out/in is too quick to work, maybe a wipe would work instead?

At 19:46, another fade out/in feels strange. It feels like a TV show pausing for a commercial break, which I think runs contrary to the more cinematic feel you are going for.

Generally speaking, I almost wonder if the Plo Koon rescue could be shortened to serve more as a First Act (i.e., under 10 mins or so) to give your episodes more of a traditional three Act feel. Otherwise, it still has that feeling of simply stitching TV episodes together.

It’s possible that some of these things I’m referencing are present in the original source material. My disclaimer is that I’m not familiar enough with it to know, so keep that in mind.

theprion said:

NeverarGreat said:
in Starlight Rey’s journey is more clearly about her quick acceptance of the Dark Side to survive, implying that she must find a mentor in the Force if she is to avoid this dark fate. Her meeting with Luke retains its former meaning, but now gains a new one in that Rey is revealing her deep spiritual and emotional need for guidance. She is not a centered, self-sufficient character as she was portrayed in the theatrical version, but a hurt, wounded character who has survived only by giving in to vengeance. With this new context the final moments seem to me to be a fitting culmination of Rey’s journey given the assumption that Luke takes the saber and becomes the mentor she needs. In this way the film ends on the perfect moment, for any rejection by Luke would throw her into deeper temptation as TLJ reveals.

What a great piece of insight, just sold me on the edit. Can I get a look-see?

I second this. Could not agree more. I like that you are thinking about the theme and message of the sequel trilogy, rather than just slicing and dicing on the basis of what you think fits the canon of the OT.

As an aside, something that Poppasketti’s Rekindled fails to do, that perhaps your TLJ edit could conceivably accomplish, is making Holdo less of a nonsense character.

I know I’m just some rando on the Internet, but I cannot recommend this review of TLJ enough:

https://youtu.be/T2cBTLsWiDg

^ Mod Edit: ‘A Guide to The Last Jedi (for the Star Wars Fan Base)’ - a 38 minute video at the Nerrel youtube channel. Why this has been posted in here, ‘The Force Awakens: Starlight’ project thread is lost on me.
 

Not only is it hilarious, but it talks a lot about what TLJ was at least TRYING to accomplish. Rather than just hating on the film, he talks a lot about TLJ’s strengths and provides a lot of insight into Poe and Holdo. I only recommend this because I think you have done a fine job of bringing out the best in TFA and making it much stronger thematically.

I’ll say again that it is an exceptional edit that combines the best from past edits. Your prequel trilogy really is the “goldilocks” best of all worlds approach. It is “just right”, neither being too conservative, nor too heavy-handed. More people need to check this out.

I’ve watched your latest edit twice now, and I have only a few comments. Something that seems inconsistent with your prior edits is the droids. They are nearly silent in your edits of TPM and AotC, but a lot of their hapless, slapstick dialogue is included in RotS. Don’t get me wrong. I LOVE the droid humor and have really come to embrace it (The Village Bride had it, and it made me happy), but again, I wonder if it reflects an inconsistency.

On the decapitation of Dooku, I think you’ve got the right idea, but I wonder if I can’t be tightened up a bit. Anakin holds the lightsabers to Dooku’s neck for I think about seven seconds, and you’re left wondering what the hold up is. It just seems a little drawn out.

I agree with all the cuts, generally speaking. I would say, however, that some of the audio might need a little finessing in places to make it truly seamless. I’ll add that I’m noticing this mostly with your most recent cuts. Sometimes the music doesn’t sound right, or one line of dialogue doesn’t transition well to the next (sometimes it’s the volume, and sometimes it’s the timing). There also seems to be a small audio glitch when C3P0 is reacting to Bail Organa saying to wipe his memory.

These are all very minor. Just some observations while watching the last couple of times.

This edit is damn near perfect. I’m curious, however, what your reasoning was for cutting down the Obi Wan/Jango Fett fight. Parts of it are ridiculous, to be fair, but other parts are okay. It’s a very small thing that doesn’t detract from my enjoyment of the edit. I really am just curious.

Jar Jar Bricks said:

I mean, yeah. If Palps wants them to come together to him for his plan to work, and Kylo spends the entire film trying to do just that, then he’s kinda getting played. Makes Kylo seem kinda foolish at the very least.

Yes, Kylo is getting played, but that is what you’d expect. That is what Palpatine is known for. He played the Jedi Council and the Senate, too.

Seems like it would work.

StarkillerAG said:

Actually, I think Palpatine knowing about the dyad survived well into the post-production process: the Reddit leaks that came from post-production workers described Palpatine’s plan being to drain Rey and Kylo’s energy, even claiming that Palpatine talked about the dyad during his first scene.

In general, the plot leaks before release sound a lot better than the movie itself: it feels less rushed, more developed, and generally more satisfying. Unfortunately, unless they eventually release the deleted scenes, it will be impossible to make the movie feel like it did before it was mangled in editing.

That is a very compelling case for adding some clarity to the third act, and some consistency to Palpatine’s ambitions, as well as a more meaningful resolution for Rey.

I think I have a rough idea of how to streamline the ending and even have it be thematically more powerful. First, remove the whole death ritual angle. This way, Palpatine is not asking Rey to kill him, but rather offering her a deal similar to what he offered Kylo at the beginning of the film, except in this case he is inviting her to rule as grandfather and granddaughter. This is more compelling to Rey for two reasons: 1) It seems as though Palpatine may be sincerely reaching out to her as family, and offering her something that would make her more than a “nobody”, i.e., a “birthright”, and 2) whereas Rey initially wanted to “destroy” Palpatine for killing her parents, Luke’s pep talk actually softened her up and helped her dial down her anger/hatred. So now she is going to face Palpatine, but is completely thrown off kilter by his proposal and no longer sure she wants to kill him. He is offering her everything she ever wanted after all, i.e., family and a sense of identity. Having said all that, Palpatine is really only trying to buy time until Kylo arrives so he can draw strength from their Dyad. This is because he’s presumably quite weak, and Rey could realistically defeat him in his infeebled state. Rey ultimately rejects his proposal of course, but at least in this way, it could be a little bit tempting for her. However as soon as Kylo/Ben arrives, Palpatine immediately turns on her, because he no longer needs to buy time. And so he gets to work sapping their energy. I think this ending is much better, because in this case, at least Rey is offered a more difficult choice, i.e., a sense of belonging and identity with her grandfather, or a lonely life as the last remaining jedi. Of course, after her trial of faith so to speak, the Jedi come through for her, proving that they can also provide that sense of belonging and identity.

So this is how it might work with the death ritual removed:

Palpatine: I never wanted you dead, I wanted you here. Empress Palpatine, you will take the thrown. It is your birthright.
Rey: I haven’t come to lead the Sith, I’ve come to end them.
Palpatine: Your hatred. Your anger. You want to kill me.
(remove line about him wanting the same thing. Remove any dialogue urging her to kill him.)
Rey: All you want is for me to hate, but I won’t, not even you.
Palpatine: Luke was saved by his father. The only family you have here, is me.
Palpatine: No one is coming to help your friends. Take the throne. …Only you have the power to save your friends.
(This is where Rey Force transfers the lightsaber to Ben and the fighting ensues)
Palpatine: You are nothing. A scavenger girl… (granted, this line would have to be moved from later in the scene, and may not be possible, but it isnt essential to do so either).
Palpatine: Stand together, die together…(etc., etc.,)

I feel like the shot where Palpatine throws Ben off the cliff could easily be removed. It would be one less annoying fake out, which this movie is full of. However, that is neither here nor there.

Other lines from earlier in the film could be removed as well, such as Palpatine telling Kylo: “Kill me and my spirit will pass into you, as all the Sith live in me.” This line wouldn’t be necessary since it wouldn’t factor in later in the film. Another line that could be trimmed would be where Kylo says to Rey: “What Palpatine doesn’t know, is that we’re a Dyad in the Force.” The first half about Palpatine not knowing could be removed, retaining the useful bit of information in the second half. Again, I just think it’s really implausible, if Palpatine has been manipulating Kylo all this time, that he doesn’t know about the Dyad, and doesn’t have plans to exploit it.

I think the problem with Palpatine in TRoS, fundamentally, (aside from the fact that they never should have brought him back) is that he comes across as fickle and ignorant. In the prequels—where we really get to know him best—we learn that he’s very willing to play the long game and wait things out. We also learn that he is a master manipulator, making people do exactly what he wants without them knowing it.

I’m okay with Palpatine ordering Kylo to kill Rey IF he thinks that it will only manipulate Kylo to do the opposite and try to team up with Rey to defeat him. That is, I think it works really well if we understand it as Palpatine intentionally manipulating Kylo to betray him. It works if he is also using Kylo to indirectly manipulate Rey to seek out Palpatine to destroy him, i.e., for killing her parents. Also learning that she is a Palpatine causes her to doubt herself and think she is fated to join the dark side, etc.

But all these clever manipulations only work IF Palpatine’s overarching goal, from start to finish, is to lure Kylo and Rey to him so he can exploit their Force Dyad to regenerate himself. But instead, Palpatine outs himself as a complete moron by A) Seeming quite ignorant of their Force Dyad, B) trying to coerce Rey into killing him, WHICH SHE’S ALREADY THERE TO DO, making her LESS LIKELY to want to do it (it’s like he’s using reverse psychology, but in a way that disadvantages himself), and C) flip-flopping on what he actually wants to do. This is not the Palpatine we know and love to hate!

Perhaps this is outside the scope of Ascendent, and I respect that. But as it stands, the third act is still really convoluted and Palpatine is acting radically out of step with what we know of him from prior films. And I feel like it’s fixable by having his underlying motive be to exploit the power of their Force Dyad all along. Perhaps another project will take a shot at it, as I think there is a definite opportunity for improvement in the third act.

Hal 9000 said:
If anything, it was rude of Rey not to return the favor. Maybe she could have tried if he hadn’t vanished. Good thing she didn’t vanish, though, I guess.

I think it’s funny that Ben pretty much dies three times in the film.

I’d say it’s probably best if you don’t think about things too much with TRoS, but that’s not a luxury a faneditor has.

I’ve watched v1 of this edit several times now. It’s a massive improvement overall. However, I still feel like things just fall apart at the end. The final act is just a big, confusing mess. Is there nothing more that can be done? I feel like the first act is good, and the second act is actually really strong and engaging, but the third act still has me scratching my head. Wouldn’t it be better if Palpatine’s plan all along was to lure Kylo and Rey to Exegol so he could use the power of their force dyad to regenerate himself?

That way, Rey and Kylo think they have their own motivations, i.e., Rey wants to destroy Palpatine, and Kylo wants to team up with Rey to rule the galaxy (and also destroy Palpatine), but all Palpatine wants is to lure them both there so he can take their power.

It’s also really weak that Palpatine tells Rey he wants her to kill him (so that he can possess her) because saying such a thing would actually de-motivate her to follow through on that plan. I just think the whole “kill me, and ascend the throne” thing is really dumb and could possibly be cut out. Palpatine just isn’t this stupid and ignorant.

As an aside, I also just don’t understand Ben bringing Rey back to life. Healing is one thing, but bringing people back from the dead is a Sith power (or ambition). The Jedi way is to accept death. That’s well established. So wouldn’t it be simpler and better if Ben dies when Palpatine sends him over the cliff and Rey defeats Palpatine without being overwhelmed and dying?

Octorox said:
I felt it was a bit abrupt that Padme and Anakin just sneak in through a side entrance and in the next scene they’re at the table with Dooku.

I’ll add that in the preceding scene Padme says to Anakin something like, “Whatever happens, follow my lead. As a member of the Senate, maybe I can find a diplomatic solution to this.” So the scene where Padme sits down with Dooku does follow logically. Their plan is fairly clear, and I don’t think they believe they are sneaking in the side door.

Why doesn’t Anakin just pull his lightsaber? Well, even though Anakin is naturally very impulsive, perhaps his Jedi instincts have kicked in and are telling him this isn’t the right time and to be patient. After all, he essentially does the equivalent in the droid factory scene when Jango points his blaster at him and Anakin immediately backs down (I’d actually contend this is even more bizarre).

There are good reasons for leaving it in and good reasons for taking it out, and even I don’t know for sure where I stand. For me, the best reason to remove the droid factory sequence is because doing do actually heightens the tension of the following scene where Padme sits down with Dooku. Padme at least appears like she’s going in there with a degree of influence and clout, rather than as someone who is already a hostage. There is at least the pretense of a real negotiation about to take place, and they only realize by the meeting’s end that they are completely screwed.

TRoS has a lot of “gotcha” moments that are quite confusing. It isn’t that they are hard to grasp, just irritating. Not only is the film moving at breakneck speed, but you are also being jerked around by it in a way that is synergistically annoying. Perhaps most annoying is Palpatine and his ever-shifting, ever-ambiguous motives. I just think if the film was simply more straight-forward, it would be significantly better.

I hardly think it’s analogous to a scoop of feces. Poppasketti seems to have done a fine job with it.

I think any fanedit made by someone who hates the film they are editing is destined to fail. The best fanedits are made by those who have the ability to be critical but still have at least some respect and affection for the source material, as well as regard for the filmmaker’s vision.

Love it. I especially think this is a good edit for people who have watched and enjoyed The Clone Wars. Outstanding work. I hope many others will give this fanedit a try.

I just want to start by saying that I think one of your greatest strengths as a editor is that you have fantastic sensibilities. Your cuts are neither too conservative, nor too liberal, but are always just right. I’m just a guy who loves fanedits, and I really believe you have the best TPM and AotC edits, period. Anybody who hasn’t seen them should check them out.

At the end of the day, if I really have a vision for how a Star Wars fanedit should be, I should just do it myself. Chances are you know these movies better than me, and that you’ve thought about how to improve them more than I have. Therefore, I will try to be brief in addressing your points:

Regarding the decapitation scene, you make a very good point. Palpatine has betrayed Dooku and it is worthwhile to see the look on Dooku’s face when he realizes it. It is, however, Anakin’s story, after all, and I think it serves Anakin’s character better to kill Dooku impulsively and then regret it immediately afterwards. Palpatine is also a master manipulator. The fact that he could set up events so that Anakin would kill Dooku without even being told is good foreshadowing for what will come later (i.e., manipulating the Senate in very subtle, covert ways to “kill” the Republic) as well as a good indicator from the outset of where Palpatine and Anakin’s relationship currently stands. Palpatine is a puppeteer pulling the strings long before Anakin full-on pledges his allegiance to him.

On leaving Obi Wan behind, I agree (as per your subsequent edit) that once is enough, i.e., Palpatine says leave him behind, Anakin says no, and they move on.

On the “Roger” bit, I’m mostly agnostic. I don’t love it, but I don’t hate it either. I really like camp and humor in films. My issue here, however, is more that it seems like the actors goofing off, rather than the characters. It comes across to me as bloopers or outtakes. That may not be the case at all, it’s just how it comes across to me personally.

On Padme dying of a broken heart. Yes, for me it was the issue of the droid saying there was nothing wrong with her medically, which still implies she has lost the will to live. I get that Lucas was trying to model this after a Shakespearean tragedy of sorts, but people don’t literally die of broken hearts (and it’s a betrayal of her character).

On Vaders tantrum. Maybe we’ve just gotten used to hearing it, but I remember being in the theatre and hearing Vader’s “Nooooooo” for the first time. I remember the laughter and groans it elicited from the audience. I will admit L8wrtr’s solution isn’t perfect, but for me, I don’t necessarily need to see Anakin’s reaction to Padme’s death. Rather, knowing that he is going to find out soon and have to live with that for the rest of his life is still satisfying to me as a viewer. L8’s edit is weighty and sad without overstating things.

On Mace saying he doesn’t trust Anakin. Yes, I agree, and I really like that scene you’ve included of Obi Wan and Mace from AotC.

In the sequel trilogy, I see the First Order as incompetent, man-baby wannabes. However, this is not how I see the Empire, which is what the First Order is trying to emulate. To me, the Empire is actually pretty terrifying, including its Emperor. So seeing Palpatine get hilariously thrown over that chair just doesn’t fly with me (no pun intended). If it was General Hux, I might in fact love it, but not when it’s Darth Sidious.

My only intent in writing this post and my prior one was to say that L8wrtr’s edit of RotS is pretty damn good. Hal 9000 is true professional, and I appreciate his work. I just wanted to point out that there may be instances where L8wrtr has made the stronger, more competent cut.

Thank you for taking the time to read and consider my feedback. It is easy to criticize after all, whereas you have actually gone through the time and effort of making these great fanedits. Again, thank you and well done.

I hadn’t thought of that, but I agree. I was thinking that the droid factory scene, while dumb, provides necessary context to what’s going on on Geonosis. I think your v2 is the quintessential AotC edit. Well done.

Just finished watching. I think it is a very fine edit. However, while it’s of course just subjective preference, I suppose I wish you had taken more cues from L8wrtr’s edit and fewer from Hal9000’s. Hal deserves a lot of credit, to be sure. I think the best thing Hal9000 did for RotS is take out the part where Anakin draws his lightsaber on a youngling. That always seemed a bit too much to me for a Star Wars movie. And Hal’s contributions to the fanediting community, including TRoS:Ascendent, cannot be overstated. However, I have always had a slight preference for L8wrtr’s RotS edit. I find it more nuanced and understated than the theatrical cut and other fanedits, and it depicts Palpatine as more devious and clever, his manipulations more subtle. For example, in your edit (and Hal’s), I find that Palpatine reveals too much of his evil side to Anakin at the beginning, gleefully urging Anakin to kill a defenseless Dooku (I like it better when Anakin simply kills Dooku in the moment, and then Palpatine reassures him). Then, moments later, he twice insists Anakin leave Obi-Wan behind, which Anakin-who is still a hero at this point-would never do. It’s careless and seems to run contrary to what Palpatine is trying to accomplish.

As for the end, I think Vader’s “Nooooooo”, even if it’s the Russian dub, is still massively cringe. L8wrtr once again handled this part with more subtlety and grace. And on that note, thank you for letting Padme die. I think the goal of preserving canon should be secondary to keeping intact the message and theme of the film. Anakin is afraid of loss, and of course, the irony is that he loses Padme by the very act of trying to prevent it. To that point, I will add that Padme essentially dying of a broken heart is unnecessary and, frankly, a little sexist. Sure, her husband turned bad, but she has two beautiful new babies to give her all the reason she needs to hold on. In my headcanon, Anakin dramatically weakened her when he force choked her, and that, in addition to the labor, are what killed her. This is what L8wrtr’s edit does, and it really just makes the most sense.

A couple of other points that are just nitpicks:
-While I wholeheartedly agree with your desire to retain some of the camp and humor, Anakin and Hayden making fun of the droids for saying “Roger” at 8:25 seems a little out of place and almost like improv. It’s funny, but it doesn’t seem Star Wars funny.
-I know this is alluded to again at 1:05:00, but I don’t like Mace Windu saying outright at 36:30 that he doesn’t trust Anakin. Given all they’ve been through in The Clone Wars, it just seems like a huge dickslap in the face. At least when he tells Anakin later “…you will have earned my trust”, it can be taken as ambiguous, i.e., possibly referencing Anakin’s incredible assertion that Palpatine is a Sith Lord.
-Near the end, while I love to see Yoda get back at Palpatine for catching him off guard with force lightning, throwing him him over the chair just looks ridiculous. It is a humiliating moment for Palpatine when by that point we should be terrified.

This last point illustrates the overall major problem with RotS in my opinion. It’s tone is all over the place. As the viewer, you feel like you’re being jostled around by certain parts that are very dark, and others that are very silly. You’re not always sure how you’re supposed to feel. It’s confusing, irritating (worse than sand). Conversely, I think L8wrtr’s edit really succeeds at being tonally consistent throughout the movie.

I don’t love everything about L8wrtr’s edit of course. Again, it retains Anakin killing the youngling. I also disagree with cutting out or even truncating Yoda’s lightsaber fight with Palpatine. I like your idea that Yoda should only pull out his saber in significant instances, but he is a Jedi after all, and the lightsaber is the Jedi’s weapon. Some people think it looks silly, but to this day I still think Yoda looks totally badass moving around like that. L8wrtr’s edit is far from perfect, but I would invite you to take yet another look at it, and consider it’s strengths, including the ways it may be superior to Hal’s edit.

I will add that I really like your placement of the deleted scenes. I feel like your TPM and AotC edits are landmark fanedits because they take the best of what has come before to balance, refine, and improve these films even further. Furthermore, as attitudes towards the prequel films have softened over time, your edits represent a more modern take that reflect current fans’ inclination to esteem these films more highly. Once again, this is a very fine edit, but I believe if you gave more weight to L8wrtr’s edit, your RotS edit would also be a landmark fanedit.

I just watched v2 of your edit. I think it is an improvement over all. However, I’m curious why you decided to reinstate the droid factory action sequence.