Unusual Sequel Trilogy Radical Redux Ideas Thread — Page 101

jadenkorr41 said:

I like that alot! My only commentary (i dont know how to do that), is if there’s a way to have him say I love you a little bit slower, so the audience can digest the mini emotional impact it gave. But i really like that edit. nice job!

I think I’ve managed to give it a little more separation and polish. Here’s an updated version:

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1pw9wuCTDntgqgJNoL_uwuvOKVTUUvbIw/view?usp=share_link

Anakin Starkiller said:

Wow, that is flawless! Where’d you get the line from?

Now to establish Jannah as Finn’s sister, something that would go a long way to explaining his instant connection to her. After meeting, he suddenly spends all his time with her as if he forgot Rose. Them being siblings makes sense given their shared backstory. The only issue is that it’s maybe a big contrived to just randomly stumble upon your long-lost sibling in an entire galaxy, but it’s not like SW hasn’t done that before. Then again, I suppose you could argue they’re “spiritually” siblings already because of their shared backstory. Maybe I’m overthinking things.

First off, thank you so much! I pulled a line from John Boyega’s performance in ‘Imperial Dreams’ (available on Netflix) where he is talking to his son. Honestly, it was just luck (or the force) that the quality and delivery were in a workable range for this edit.

Regarding the stuff with Jannah–I don’t want to hi-jack this thread and harp on my own edit too much but I think small changes like focusing on Finn’s force sensitivity throughout with subtle zooms and a minor scene adjustment here or there and suddenly the through-line of “the force brought us together” has more weight. De-emphasizing implications of romance (I’m looking at you “you had a good teacher” scene) also works well for this purpose.

RogueLeader said:

I do see the motivation in wanting to do that. I think where your train of thought is going though at the end is enough of a reason to explain the bond they share. They both are lost children, and that shared experience brings them together. Someone may have done this in their edit already, but I think it would be
great if was more explicit that the story of Finn was what inspired Jannah’s group to abandon the First Order. It might add more to why Jannah and her people are eager to follow Finn into the fray.

Ummm, if this exists—I need to see it. That was something I always wanted to do more with but could never quite crack. In any case, you guys are all fantastic. Thanks for the feedback.

Cheers!

I think the added clarity is nice, though it does bring to the forefront the inherent issues in the voice. It sounds like ‘I love you’ is too close to the camera for a line delivered from a medium distance away from the camera. For instances like this I find that adding just a touch of reverb can help ‘place’ the sound into the environment, though you don’t want to overdo the effect.

Another issue may be that the line is too centralized in the mix. If the sound is coming from the central channel it gives the effect that the camera is placed directly in front of an actor, so putting some of the voice in the left and right speakers, and even maybe some reflected sound in the rear speakers, may help for a surround mix.

Finally, the line is definitely lower in energy than you’d expect for Finn’s usual shouted delivery, so perhaps instead of increasing the volume of the line, you could try decreasing the volume of the surrounding effects.

All in all, I think your first attempt sounds more natural in terms of timing and volume, but these suggestions may give that version the clarity you’re after without highlighting the limitations of the line.

Sorry about that. I’ll update the link once I’ve had a chance to revisit some of the introduced dialog inconsistencies pointed out by Neverar with the latest render. I wanted fresh ears when I do attack it (probably this evening).

The broken link in a previous post has been updated but I’m also including it here for convenience.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1pw9wuCTDntgqgJNoL_uwuvOKVTUUvbIw/view?usp=drivesdk

Cheers!

First version it is. I really like the emotional beat at this point in the film using this edit but I wonder if it works in the context of the rest of the film. His other interactions with Rose are stiff and don’t seem to indicate anything beyond camaraderie. I wish there was a moment at the end in the celebration that could be used to sell this a little better.

It’s pretty subtle but I think you can imply romance with a gentle re-sequencing of the end celebration. See the link below for proof of concept:

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1vU8RTCz2mi-SJvnDAeOAhqbqlcHYreF6/view?usp=share_link

That’s really impressive! I’m a StormPilot guy myself, but those who want to keep the TLJ ship could easily insert this into an edit!

And one last one–not so much to imply romance but more to remove stiffness/borderline disinterest. This one required more invasive methods to pull off so if anything looks or sounds wonky let me know.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1AdWQB5pXLEfXc6BQFNJFnLhAXbU1h9kL/view?usp=share_link

That’s fair. The problem I have with that scene in a Finn-Rose romance edit is when he walks away with the hand on the shoulder and the tight-lipped smile I read it as almost patronizing. There is no warmth there. Ultimately it’s less about adding in a suggestion of romance but more taking out something that possibly contradicts the believability of romance between them.

I took another pass with that moment still in but retaining some of the subtle adjustments like timing of music in relation to dialog, removing Rose’s look of exasperation, etc… I think it may not be as obtrusive to a romance edit now and possibly gives a better transition into the next sequence.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1GhL7MS1LOEiT0ajUJ0Zl3qldXjUXIGNB/view?usp=share_link

The crawl to my edit attempts to set this stage somewhat:

Luke Skywalker has vanished.
In his absence, the sinister
FIRST ORDER has risen from
the ashes of the Empire and
will stop at nothing until
Skywalker, the last Jedi, has
been destroyed.

As the peaceful New
Republic struggles to fight
this resurgent menace,
General Leia Organa gathers
her allies and leads a brave
RESISTANCE. She is
desperate to find her brother
Luke and restore hope to the
galaxy.

A few thoughts from a recent rewatch of the full trilogy, to smooth out the whole in the light of TROS:

• TLJ’s opening crawl seems to me the best place to reference explicitly that the New Republic has no fleet now, since none shows up in that movie or TROS. (Expanded canon explains that it was mostly destroyed when berthed at Hosnian Prime, and that the remaining fleets were mainly reabsorbed by their original sovereign states out of fear.)
• TFA’s destruction of Hosnian Prime has always bugged me when the Starkiller laser splits to attack multiple targets - that just doesn’t feel natural to me. I’d remove that shot from TFA edits.
• Expanding on the prior two points, it’d also be nice to see an orbital fleet’s destruction (maybe with expository dialogue) during Hosnian’s destruction.
• It’d take some VFX work, but since there’s a large implied time jump between TLJ and TROS, compared to TFA to TLJ being much less time, I’d prefer to keep C-3PO’s red arm throughout TLJ.
• I still wonder if there’re more opportunities to seed Palpatine’s return through the first two movies. We know he’s “every voice in [Kylo’s] head”, so I wonder if his visions - and Rey’s when she’s connected to his mind - might give us a few more opportunities to hear hints at his presence.
• I’d remove Rey’s line “me too- big secret” from TFA, since it implies she’s aware of her own mystery, which doesn’t really work with how that mystery box unfolds.
• I also wonder if there’s any opportunity to seed anything at all about Palpatine’s hidden Sith cult or fleet. Maybe when talking about how Kylo/Snoke are force users, someone could comment “even old Sith Cults have been silent for decades”.

https://youtu.be/dAqdjk41AkI?list=TLPQMjAwODIwMjNMfxFt8qTo_g
This one change would really elevate TROS and the trilogy as a whole.

When Rey first enters upon Sidious’ lair, she is not greeted with a zombie like Sith lord in a dark and hellish throne room, rather, she enters upon an ornately beautiful garden spectacle with a friendly looking Sheev Palpatine sitting on a bench (whether it is a vision or deception is beside the point - think Rebels S4) harkening back to Palpatine’s seductions of Anakin Skywalker. He plays on her family heart strings, and insecurities - alas for her to finally succumb to the dark side of the force. She is the one that unleashes the lightning on the fleet, until of course Ben Solo returns. A knight of the light - ultimately sacrificing himself in a demonstration of selflessness - in the spirit of his uncle before him. Rey is awoken by this heroic act and is inspired by the phantom of Anakin Skywalker to bring balance to the force - destroying
the Sith once and for all…

Hmm. Sounds worth writing as fan-fiction at least.