darthrush

Jeebus said:

Still haven’t had the time to give this a full watch-through, but I noticed that the audio seems to get quieter around the scene where Luke asks Leia about her mother. Is this just a problem on my end?

I don’t think so but if there are any technical issues then my apologies. This was my first fanedit and there might have been some slip ups 😉

My quality should be much better for my Last Jedi edit. I might be tackling Blade Runner 2049 as well.

SparkySywer said:

The crawl’s kind awkward.

It is a time of peril. The warring factions of the Resistance and the First Order have dealt cripplingly blows to one another.
Meanwhile, Rey completes her journey to find Skywalker, certain he can restore a spark of hope to the fight.
Finn and Poe Dameron aid General Leia Organa, in an effort to find a new base for the RESISTANCE to stand against the rising tyranny in the galaxy…

I’d replace the first paragraph with “It is a time of peril. The warring factions of the Resistance and the First Order have crippled one another, and both sides are itching to deal the final blow.”

“Both sides have attacked each other” is a weird thing to say in a crawl.

Updated the crawl with your suggestion.

I appreciate all suggestions for the crawl considering that I ain’t feeling too hot on it as of right now. Especially the third paragraph cause in there I need to introduce that Finn somehow has recovered, and what the Resistance is currently doing.

ziggyonice said:

LordPlagueis said:

• Restructure the opening fight sequence to eliminate the explosives falling onto the dreadnought. There is no gravity in space.

Then how do you explain the TIE Bombers in The Empire Strikes Back, then?

https://youtu.be/phGlo_TNDp0

The bombs falling onto the Dreadnaught is fine.

They also explain that the bombs are self propelled. Complaints are meaningless for this stuff. And even if we didn’t know they were self propelled, who cares? I really don’t see something worth fixing unless it directly involves character or story, the stuff that makes movies work for a viewer.

liamnotneeson said:

I would see Episode 9 before deciding to take Rose out or not. She may play a big part

You should probably read my response to a similar concern. An alternate version will have no possible continuity issues and the main version will work as a finale. So I’ll have options for everyone. I’m considering a third version with the opening space battle and not a drastic restructure.

I’m right with ya Handman on removing the prequel references in the second lesson.

Gimpy said:

Hal I just saw the edit, and HOT DAMN. The dramatic tension was way better in this version to the point that the Starkiller actually mattered to me. All you guys did great work, Wow. I also love R2 searching his database. 😃 Love it.

Having seen The Last Jedi, I thought it might be a good idea to edit the final duel a bit in The Force Awakens. Ren’s wound being in the wrong place is a bit jarring, but more than that, Knowing what’s coming vis Kylo and Rey gave me some ideas.

I think it would be good for the overall narrative for Rey not to kick Kylo’s ass in TFA. The duel should be cut in such a way that there is merely a stalemate, with Rey running and defending herself, until the crevice opens between her and Ren ending in stalemate.

Ren’s temporary scar could easily be explained as “he just got it while leaving the base.”

Rey beating Kylo so easily makes Kylo Ren seem very weak and ill suited to be worthy of his eventual arc in The Last Jedi since no time has passed between films.

If their duel ends in a stalemate, it leaves more room for the ambiguity that arises in the next film’s narrative. George and JJ initially developed Kylo Ren as “Jedi Killer,” not the “Emo Ren” who gets his ass handed to him by a neophyte.

After seeing the Last Jedi, it seems fitting that Kylo and Rey should have a stalemate (by Snoke’s design.)

I think the scar is a deal breaker but this doesn’t pertain to the edit at hand either.

HerekittykittyX said:

darthrush said:

DominicCobb said:

Why would you want to cut the opening space battle anyway?

I would say that it being cut would help the pacing of the film and make the movie feel more focused upon Rey, Luke, and Kylo, which is the strongest element of the film in my opinion but at the end of the day I think you lose too much to make it logically work in a fanedit.

Agree but just cut some elements down not the whole thing or just add it to the crawl

All you would need in a new crawl is that the Resistance is searching for a new base.

ChainsawAsh said:

Oh, absolutely. There’s no reason to rush v2.1 when the whole point is to polish off the roughness of v2.0, which was only “rushed out” to get it out there before TLJ.

+1

Handman said:

I recall darthrush saying he’s editing this as if it were the end of the saga, hence whatever happens in Episode IX is irrelevant.

Hand man is correct here. It’s also why the broom boy ending is gone without any hesitation.

However, I will make a second version of the edit that will avoid any possible continuity issues with episode 9.

EDIT: And I’m still not sure if that idea can even work. It’s pretty risky and would require just the right footage for me to work with but I could make it happen.

Dat_SW_Guy said:

Here’s a suggestion: Introduce the Rey/Luke scenes without the saber toss is by cutting to Rey with her saber, sitting on the beach.

I’m not following ya here. So we show her going to hand him the saber, and then just cut to her on some beach? I don’t recall a beach. Are you referring to when she picks it up after the Porgs try messing with it?

Hal 9000 said:

We all borrow from each other in more ways that can be retraced. There’s no way I won’t do an edit myself eventually, and I’ll definitely be using the best ideas and resources available. I’d rather not release it than not make it the best it can be.

As with Handman, let me know if I can be of any help at all. It’s for selfish reasons, you understand. 😉

Thanks Hal 😉

Handman said:

You make a lot of cuts I’d rather not make, but bring up a lot of things I’d like to get rid of too. You wouldn’t mind if I borrowed some elements of your cutlist? I had forgotten a few of these. Our edits will most likely be completely different otherwise, as I’m not planning on reordering the scenes and cutting all humor nearly as much.

That’s absolutely no problem. I’ll also be greatly looking forward to your edit as well.

Main Goals of the Edit:

1. Improve the pacing of the movie. Give more focus to the Rey/Luke material.
2. Cut down any humor that undercuts a scene or feels out of place.
3. New Music for a few of the key sequences in the film to give further emotional weight.
4. New Color grade for warmer colors and natural skin tones.

Versions of This Edit:

1. Standard Edition (Same as cutlist. Nothing more. Nothing less.)
2. Time Passage Edition (The ending of the Force Awakens is in The Last Jedi. New opening crawl below implies passage of time.)
3. Skywalker Lives Edition (Luke Skywalker survives. We end the movie with him staring at the binary sunsets in this version.)

I am rescoring two scenes in the movie and if you are not a fan of the replaced music, there will be a secondary audio track without the rescores.

New Crawl:

Below is a rough draft of the crawl.

—It is a time of peril. The warring factions of the Resistance and the First Order have dealt cripplingly blows to one another.
Meanwhile, Rey continues her journey to find Skywalker, certain he can restore a spark of hope to the fight.
But the First Order has at last found the Resistance. As their forces speed to the base, General Leia mounts a desperate escape…—

Detailed Cut List:

-Color Correction over entire film by Dr. Dre. For warmer colors and natural skintones.
-Retro Fox Fanfare Used
-Replaced crawl music with more bombastic version.
-Removed entire opening joke with Poe and Hux. Goes from Poe telling himself “happy beeps” to him pushing a button and then his ship boosting forward.
-Cut Hux’s dumbfounded face when Poe begins taking out the cannons.
-Cut Leia telling 3PO to “get that nervous expression” off his face.
-Trimmed down whack-a-mole joke with BB-8.
-Luke now drops the saber instead of tossing it.
-Cut Luke saying “Go Away”. Sounds childish.
-Cut Luke and blue milk creature.
-Cut Leia slapping Poe.
-Cut Poe saying “We need to get away from those Star Destroyers.”
-Trimmed the end of the bridge explosion so that Leia does not fly out into space.
-Cut Leia space walking scene.
-Cut entire sequence with Chewie and Porgs at the campfire.
-Cut the “doing talking” joke from Rose.
-Cut the “may the force be with you” joke from Finn to Rose.
-Trim conversation when Finn and Rose meet.
-Cut the second time Rose says “They can track us through lightspeed!?”
-Cut Finn’s saying “I can’t feel my teeth, what did you shoot me with?”
-Cut the sexual joke, “Oh yes, he can” from the Maz call.
-Cut Caretakers after the first force facetime.
-Cut Luke tickling Rey with leaf during “reach out” scene.
-Cut Chewie raging at porgs messing with Falcon.
-Cut Porgs nesting themselves in the Falcon.
-Cut Rose talking about how Canto Bight is a terrible city.
-We jump straight from the establishing shots of the Casino activity, to Rose/Finn finding the man with the lapel.
-Cut rock falling on Caretaker cart after Rey slices it in half.
-Cut Rey telling Kylo to put a cowl on.
-Cut voiceover in the cave. Begin the VO when Rey says “I’ve never felt so alone.”
-Yoda scene is now moved towards later in the film right before we see Crait.
-Cut the joke of Finn saying “Look at us”.
-Cut DJ saying “blip-boppity-boop”.
-Cut ironing gag.
-Cut Rose/Finn/DJ in clothing room.
-Cut trash bin being put on BB-8.
-Cut BB-8 tripping storm trooper.
-Cut evil BB unit scanning them. Evil BB-8 is gone in this edit.
-Cut Rose getting medallion back and them arriving at the door.
-Cut evil BB unit looking at BB-8.
-Cut the cringeworthy “May the force be with you” exchange between Holdo and Leia.
-Cut close up of lightsaber turning next to Snoke to tone down the foreshadowing.
-Put “Duel of the Fates” over the throne room guard fight.
-Put second half of “Anakin’s Dark Deeds” over the scene of Kylo pleading Rey to join him.
-Cut entire Phasma fight.
-Cut silly close up of Snoke’s dead face.
-Yoda Scene now comes after the scene of Kylo declaring himself the Emperor.
-Cut Rose telling Finn to stabilize his speeder.
-Cut joke of Poe’s foot falling through the speeder.
-Cut us seeing Rose’s medallion. She doesn’t get it back in this version.
-Cut Porg screaming in Falcon cockpit.
-Cut Porg’s flying around in Falcon when it is being chased by TIE fighters.
-Cut Rose saying “Now that’s a big gun”.
-Cut joke of Hux repeating Kylo’s orders.
-Finn now gets blown out of the way by an AT-AT last second before he reaches the cannon. Rose no longer swoops in and nearly kills her friend.
-Cut the shoulder swipe from Luke. Kills the tension of the moment.
-Cut the “right away sir” joke.
-Cut Luke’s odd looking snarl at Kylo during their fight.
-Cut out both slow motion moments in the Luke/Kylo fight.
-Cut shot of books on Falcon.
-Cut Finn tending to Rose on the Falcon.
-Cut to credits on Falcon, not with Broom boy.
-Last piece in end credits is now Yoda’s theme.

suspensiondigital said:

I’m willing to help with some VFX stuff (like fixing the crate or splicing shots that almost but don’t quite cut together, etc.).

If your speaking of connecting the shots where Kylo swings at Luke (after someone removes the slowmo) then you can bet that would be really valuable for many here. That sounds awesome. I’m trying to dabble in some VFX myself when I have the time.

Handman said:

darthrush said:

Collipso said:

“Let’s go chrome dome!”

“You were always scum.”
“Rebel scum”.

I’ll be cutting these. Currently developing my cutlist. Expect a dedicated thread pretty soon.

I look forward to it. As Phasma will be gone entirely from my edit, those lines are too.

I’m considering this cut as well but haven’t made up my mind yet. How you would you execute it?

Collipso said:

“Let’s go chrome dome!”

“You were always scum.”
“Rebel scum”.

I’ll be cutting these. Currently developing my cutlist. Expect a dedicated thread pretty soon.

Handman said:

darthrush said:

I think you’d have to cut the part of DJ stealing from the ship as well. It doesn’t fit since as the viewer, you have no idea what Canto Bight is and it’s a lot easier to assume it is a resistance ship. And if you move that plot later in the film, you can just have Poe and them agree to find the master codebreaker, then only a few scenes later just have Poe call them and they say “we found A codebreaker”. No need for dubbed lines.

Possibly, however we still need to set up that DJ’s not to be trusted, I was thinking of just removing the Canto Bight references. DJ telling Hux about the shuttles is pivotal, otherwise it seems like the First Order knows about them anyway. That makes Holdo’s plan that much stupider, which we can’t have given the way she treats Poe. I’ll see how it plays out, and if it doesn’t work, it doesn’t work.

Watch that scene again in theatres closely. There is nothing but talk of Canto Bight. Finn walks in, asks for the medallion, asks why he’s stealing, says at least your stealing from the bad guys (Canto Bight) and then the entire rest of the scene is DJ showing Finn that Canto Bight sells to both sides. There’s nothing in there to salvage which doesn’t conflict. And I don’t see the need for it either. All it shows is that he is willing to steal, so…eh

I think you’d have to cut the part of DJ stealing from the ship as well. It doesn’t fit since as the viewer, you have no idea what Canto Bight is and it’s a lot easier to assume it is a resistance ship. And if you move that plot later in the film, you can just have Poe and them agree to find the master codebreaker, then only a few scenes later just have Poe call them and they say “we found A codebreaker”. No need for dubbed lines.

DominicCobb said:

Why would you want to cut the opening space battle anyway?

I would say that it being cut would help the pacing of the film and make the movie feel more focused upon Rey, Luke, and Kylo, which is the strongest element of the film in my opinion but at the end of the day I think you lose too much to make it logically work in a fanedit.

After thinking about it, there are some bigger issues that come up when you axe the opening space battle. As much as I would like to be able to cut even more of the runtime down, I don’t think that is a feasible option for multiple reasons.

First, you lose the logical and emotional introduction to Rose as a character. I don’t see how you can introduce her crying over her medallion if we have no idea why, and then we are somewhat confused as to what her past is and what the Resistance means to her. We don’t have sufficient motivation for any of her actions.

Second, you now have more issues when introducing the character of DJ. Under the idea of removing Canto Bight entirely, we first see him on the way back to the Resistance. His introduction would then be him asking for a price and then Rose giving the medallion. Sadly, you’d have to lose the stuff afterwards of him stealing the ship and talking to Finn since they refer to it as a stolen Canto Bight ship, whereas with the changes, we would assume it as a Resistance ship.

But if you cut out the foundation for the importance of the Medallion, then none of it really makes that much sense when you see Rose hand over the Medallion and then her getting it back. As an audience member, you have no idea what it means to her as a character.

And Lastly, you lose the initial setup for Poe’s character arc. This one doesn’t mean nearly as much to me, cause you can still have his arc begin when he defies the power of Holdo. So this is more of a nitpick, but it would still be worth losing it ultimately to give more focus to the A-plot of Luke, Rey, and Kylo.

But the the first two issues seem like pretty big obstacles to actually removing the opening space battle and starting on Ach-To.

I like the idea of opening on the last scene of the TFA and connecting that with the opening of the Last Jedi. My idea would be to rescore the music of when she sees him and have her walk up to him, then pull out the lightsaber when she’s closer, she holds it out, Luke looks at her (using a shot from TFA), and then he just walks past her. With the right editing and musical rescoring, it could be very powerful.

The only issue is that you would need a crawl explaining that the Resistance has fled their base and is being chased by the First Order, which wouldn’t be hard. But someone skilled in special effects would have to create an opening shot after you pan down from the crawl showing Ach-To and THEN you would cut to the Millennium Falcon jumping out of hyperspace and them arriving (assuming you use a TFA ending like DigiMod’s).

ChainsawAsh said:

Cross-posting this from the DVD cover section, hope that’s okay - only gonna bump your Episode I thread though, not the other two, so as not to clutter up the front page. (ugh, that was too much Reddit-speak in one paragraph, sorry about that…)

ChainsawAsh said:

Okay, whipped these up real quick - mods of my prequel covers for HAL9000’s edits (running times based on v4.2). … I figure either of the regular TFA covers I made would work for Restructured unless someone wants one that actually says “Restructured” on the case somewhere, or wants the FE logos and stuff on the back.

Album here. (“theatrical logo” spines only; the “saga logo” spines are ready to go if anyone wants them, I just haven’t saved them as JPEGs yet)

Beautiful covers!

My preferred Episode 9 would be Chewie dying with the Falcon, Finn dying, Hux trying to overthrow Kylo, Luke haunting Kylo, and I have no idea what they should do with Rey.

Overall, I’m not super excited since TLJ tied up so many plot threads.

Handman said:

darthrush said:

Jackpumpkinhead said:

darthrush said:

Handman said:

Why not stitch together the two scenes before and after they call Maz into one? I wish I had the script, but there should be enough there to show they need a specific codebreaker, and if you cut canto bight entirely, you don’t need to explain why they need to go there.

Finn: "No one can get in there, they scramble the shields code every hour."
Poe: “I think I know someone.”

Cut to Finn and Rose leaving on the shuttle. That’s all you need.

It’s all about the dialogue. I recall him just lifting his head up and then we cut to maz but if he says “I think I know someone” then you can cut straight from there to the radar blip and then you see them pick up Poe’s call on the ship that they found a code breaker. And then you have the scene of him stealing from the ship after that before they arrive at the supremacy. You could also cut down them sneaking around (iron joke, evil BB-8, jokes).

Good thinking Handman, I think that’s the best way I’ve heard yet to cut down Canto Bight.

You’re right about it being all about the dialogue, and unfortunately the dialogue isn’t there. Poe never says, “I think I know someone”. He just looks up and points at Finn. You may be able to lift some audio from another Oscar Isaac film though.

Ha, I knew I wasn’t crazy!

Dammit, I knew I was crazy, but this is really disappointing to see the evidence of it.

LOL

Jackpumpkinhead said:

darthrush said:

Handman said:

Why not stitch together the two scenes before and after they call Maz into one? I wish I had the script, but there should be enough there to show they need a specific codebreaker, and if you cut canto bight entirely, you don’t need to explain why they need to go there.

Finn: "No one can get in there, they scramble the shields code every hour."
Poe: “I think I know someone.”

Cut to Finn and Rose leaving on the shuttle. That’s all you need.

It’s all about the dialogue. I recall him just lifting his head up and then we cut to maz but if he says “I think I know someone” then you can cut straight from there to the radar blip and then you see them pick up Poe’s call on the ship that they found a code breaker. And then you have the scene of him stealing from the ship after that before they arrive at the supremacy. You could also cut down them sneaking around (iron joke, evil BB-8, jokes).

Good thinking Handman, I think that’s the best way I’ve heard yet to cut down Canto Bight.

You’re right about it being all about the dialogue, and unfortunately the dialogue isn’t there. Poe never says, “I think I know someone”. He just looks up and points at Finn. You may be able to lift some audio from another Oscar Isaac film though.

Ha, I knew I wasn’t crazy!