Vultural

The Brides Of Dracula - 1960 - 6/10

Well, the young man was so handsome! And his mama kept him in those dreadful chains. So, of course, I helped free him.
So muses the pretty new schoolteacher, after she frees the Transylvanian vampire.
Named Count Meinster, by the way, no Vlad in this one.
However – one Van Helsing just happens to be in the neighborhood.
Hammer outing boasts Cushing, a good-looking David Peel, attractive females, Gothic sets.
Not completely predictable, this remains enjoyable in spite of a well-traveled narrative.

Dry Water - 2019 - 6/10
AKA - Auga Seca

Son Fran is an idealist, developing a process for dry water to help drought stricken regions.
Too bad his family is more profit oriented.
Their business is international export, and when a bloody death occurs at the pier, police visit.
And the detectives keep at it, since stories and evidence does not add up.
Two short seasons of corruption and investigation.
To tell the truth, I was happy with one, deciding it was more accurate to reality.

Diary Of A Nobody - 2007 - 7/10

Mr. Pooter holds himself, and his lot, with higher regard than his actual station.
Fortunately, he keeps a diary and jots down his thoughts on the day, anxieties, regards of others, despairs.
Engaging from the start, this is essentially a one-man play.
Hugh Bonneville embodies the soul of the man, fleshes him out, makes him one we might like to meet.
Light-hearted comedy, in the amusing vein, for fans of Victorians, Edwardians.

Heads For Sale - 1970 - 6/10
AKA - Nü Xia Mai Ren Tou // 女俠賣人頭

After Pi-Lien marriage proposal is rejected, she enters the young lord’s villa, swords at hand.
Things simmer down once he tries to make amends.
Just as well, since thugs and bullies are multiplying, with heroes short in supply.
Shaw Brothers film has numerous fights, even more characters – I could not keep track.
As ever, the choreography is something to marvel at.
The title is a misnomer, since this is an actioner, though it would be perfect for a retail horror shop.
Mid-tier from the studio, yet it will keep you awake after 2:00 AM.

Santa Fe Trail - 1940 - 6/10

New West Point graduates, and best friends, Jeb Stuart and George Custer, are assigned the Kansas Territory.
Not yet a state, Kansas, then known as Bleeding Kansas, is where John Brown sets fire to hearts and homes.
Rousing action film is peppered with more historical names: Jefferson Davis, Robert E Lee, James Longstreet, Phil Sheridan …
Inaccuracies abound. Characters actually graduated in different class years, nor were most friends.
Don’t get me going about the use of revolvers during the musket era.
Those not into history should enjoy; there is plenty of firepower.
Raymond Massey dominates as the fiery abolitionist, John Brown.

Late Night With The Devil - 2023 - 7/10

“You okay, Jack? He, he, he.”
Of course late night host Jack Delroy is not okay.
His beloved wife recently died, show ratings are slipping, cancellation seems nigh.
Halloween night, the guests are a bizarre assortment of intense types.
A psychic, a debunker, a medium, and one possessed?
Set has the feel of a Carson knockoff. Think Geraldo or Springer, minus the staged fights.
Entertaining, and well directed.
Helps if you recall the Satanic Panic, although that peaked in the 80’s.

A Kiss From Beyond The Grave - 1963 - 5/10
AKA - El Beso de Ultratumba

Wannabe writer Emilio has been sponging off friends for years.
Someday, he may actually write a sentence.
Visiting his doctor, to borrow money from him, he notices the pretty new receptionist.
He asks her out – then – “You’re the daughter of the rich industrialist?” / “Yes.” / “Will you marry me?” / “Sure, I guess.”
Yes, it really does go that fast. Just as fast, the potential wealth vanishes.
Except new bride Laura has an immense insurance policy.
If only she would die.
Dark thriller has scary moments, but naïve and gullible Laura defies belief.

JeruZalem - 2015 - 5/10
AKA - ג’רוזלם

Film opens strong with five minutes of ominous backstory, setting the tone.
Which is shattered by two vacationing American girls. Squealing in the air, on the ground, detouring to Jerusalem.
Both highly annoying, I kept hoping for the Horror element to kick in and for them to get killed.
After some forty minutes in, the narrative darkens, although our girls still sound like a bag of cats.

Every scene is shot, point-of-view, from one female’s smart glasses.
Tolerated for a bit, grows staler than travel underwear.
Despite intriguing potential, this is a bungled job all around.
Writer / director brothers Paz clearly view females as stupid, and portray them as such.

Harry Wild - 2022 - 6/10

Professor Wild faces retirement with her usual accessory. Alcohol.
After being robbed, she turns into something of a sleuth.
Cozy mystery series builds the entourage by the end of episode 1.
Set and filmed in Dublin, which will appeal to many.
One might envision Hallmark salivating over this, except our star is foul mouthed, and sleeps around.
Jane Seymour demonstrates a nice flair for comedy.
More seasons followed.

Faxneld, Per - The Tree Of Sacrifice

Forty-four Folk-Gothic tales. An ideal book of interludes. Three pages each, and each with a woodblock illustration. Just the thing before bedtime, between books, between chapters of a novel.
These read like vintage campfire stories, or ominous fairy tales. While a few carry morals, most do not.
Some involve bad dealings, attempted cheats, or simply poor decisions.
More feature innocent souls, perhaps in the wrong place / situation, or Fate had tossed them a sorry hand of cards.
There are a few witches, more stories contain “cunning men” of variable skills.
This is NOT a book to be left on the nightstand of the guestroom – you will never see it again.

Joan Didion: The Center Will Not Hold - 2017 - 7/10

Imaginative biography of the writer’s life, influences, and works.
The first hour staggers through the Sixties, into the mendacious 80’s.
Vogue fashions, California sunshine, peaceful hippies and the corroded underbelly.
Marriage to John Dunne struck me as hothouse, tightly bound, not to the exclusion of friends and colleagues, yet few are in the closest zone.
This is both informative to newcomers, and perceptive for fans of her books.
Talking heads in this are well known, to say the least.

Dr. Jekyll And Mr. Hyde - 1912 - 6/10

Jekyll experiments with drugs to separate his good and evil sides.
Within seconds, the brutish Hyde emerges.
A quick change back, “Thank God it’s me again!”
Except Hyde is not so easily contained.
Edison film distills the story down to 12 minute thriller. Likely very suspenseful back in the day.

The Bride Wore Black - 1968 - 6/10
AKA - La Mariée était en Noir

Wedding day, Julie’s husband is killed.
Grief and temporary madness are soon swept aside by thoughts of vengeance.
Narrative now becomes “track n whack”, with ingenious demises.
While the template may seem Noir, the color photography is not.
Jeanne Moreau excels as the remorseless, yet aloof, huntress.
Probably inspired Franco’s She Killed In Ecstasy, Tarentino’s Kill Bill, among others.

A Little Princess - 1995 - 7/10

Sara, rich yet unspoilt, lives in India with her widowed father.
With the onset of the Great War, dad is dispatched to the trenches, Sara to a post New York boarding school.
All’s well, until dad is reported killed, and the money seized by the bank.
Expect no sympathy from a harsh headmistress (a sinister Eleanor Bron).
Very good family film for children, girls and boys – especially since this values girls.
Minor bullying, nothing upsetting, the tone is generally positive.
One of those rare films that, I think, received a second theatrical release.

Dr. Cyclops - 1940 - 6/10

Decades ahead of his time, the “mad” doctor decides humankind is bad for the planet.
His solution? Shrink everyone. Thus, our impact on the planet and resources will be diminished.
Per his request, other scientists arrive to confirm his findings, and end up … you guessed it.
Despite the potential, the result is a silly B-flick, saddled with an uninspired script.
Implications ignored, this becomes a survival narrative.
Early 3 color release boosts the curiosity factor.

Puppet Master - 1989 - 5/10

Yeah, first appearance of those slower-than-slugs, deadly puppets.
The dolls had lain dormant, hidden, for decades, until curious psychics arrive.
And then, the killing starts.
Depending on your taste for D-movies, or how wasted you are, this initial Full Moon outing is either goofy fun or a dull disappointment.
The puppets are ridiculous. Cheap, not particularly scary, and downright laughable.
However – the terrors have a certain weird, innocent charm that should appeal to anyone who still nurses a twisted, eight-year-old spirit inside them.
For rational types, for 99% of females, this is a mindless 90 minutes.
Wildly popular, over a dozen films followed.

Murder In Chartreuse - 2021 - 6/10
AKA - Les Bois Maudits

The first victim hangs suspended like a marionette.
He was a big man, a bully, more feared than disliked.
Come the next body, likewise hanging, puppet positioned.
Near both, wooden plaques with dates and Latin scripture.
Soon, detectives realize this is a trilogy, with a third murder to come.
This is not one for characterizations or chemistry, but a serpentine plot.
Fairly well written, although landscape not used as heavily as others of this sort.

A Touch Of Cloth - 2012 - 7/10

“What’s that you say, old man?
“Ah, yes, the police procedural, buddy cops, the whole genre, ripe for parody.
‘True, the more one knows those clichés, the more one will catch the jokes.
“Murders, yes. People will do anything to get themselves noticed nowadays.
“Refreshing to finally see a thick skulled detective. Reminds me of the cop who came after the birdbath was stolen.
“Three seasons, but only seven episodes? How much do those writers get paid, anyway?”

Under Siege 2: Dark Territory - 1995 - 5/10

Pointless sequel to Seagal’s best film. (pointless? – money)
Chief Ryback boards a Los Angeles bound train.
Just before mercenaries and terrorists arrive.
Their Plan? Gain control of a weaponized satellite and ransom or dominate the globe.
As with the original, expect Ryback to be unstoppable and unkillable.
Techno terror element far-fetched; Busey and Jones sorely missed.

Daughters Of Darkness - 1971 - 7/10
AKA - Les Lèvres Rouges

Mid-winter, the young lord and his new wife arrive at an empty Belgium hotel.
The plan is the catch a ferry back to England. Until a Hungarian countess arrives.
Despite his bride growing moodier by the moment, despite learning the Countess’s name is Báthory (!), the husband decides to linger. Well, the noble’s secretary is sexy, if feral.
Countess Báthory, meanwhile, has designs, and is a subtle gamester.
Arthouse Horror rewards multiple viewings. (Warning, languid pace.)
A moody, chilly film, essentially an updated spin on “Carmilla”.
Delphine Seyrig is perfectly cast: thoughtful, intellectual, weary, dangerous.
Do not overlooks John Karlen’s commentary, which is funny and affectionate.

Yolland, E. - Mistress Bridget And Other Tales

Historical fiction, set following the English Civil War.
With Cromwell deceased, lawlessness on both sides increases.
Adding fuel to the fires of hatred, Matthew Hopkins and his henchmen scour the land to find and execute witches, for a fee, witches being an all-purpose scapegoat for many.
Bridget is a headstrong girl, liked and disliked in equal measure by grateful / resentful villagers.
Turmoil boils over when Bridget’s parents hurriedly depart to tend an ailing relative, leaving the twenty year old Bridget to protect manor and possessions from roving cutthroats.
The yarn is well written, spiced with details and factual tidbits to please fans of this genre.
In addition, there are seven short stories. A few are barely tinged with supernatural elements, others deal with financial obsessions. Money, lack of money, hidden money, inheritances.
While I would not label this a barn burner, it was a quietly satisfying book.
Again, for readers who enjoy Victorian / Edwardian prose may find this rewarding.

The Devil’s Advocate - 1997 - 6/10

Young defense attorney in Florida had a knack for getting his clients off. Even when he knows their guilt.
His courtroom talents and lack of moral compass attracts the eye of a prestigious New York firm.
Wife, mother, G-man, all warn him that his boss, John Milton, is shady, if not sinister.
While this seems like another yarn of evil corrupting innocence, the acolyte is already a compromised soul.
A layered film, with references to “Paradise Lost”, “Faust”, and Dante’s “Inferno”. (Commentary track)
Al Pacino effective as the malevolent influence, yet he cannot quell his inner ham.
Following earlier woodenish roles, Keanu Reeves is solid in this.
Film something of a guilty pleasure and over-the-top twaddle.

Wall Street - 1987 - 7/10

Young stockbroker at a middling firm gets a chance to “bag the elephant”.
Meaning a legendary tycoon, the swaggering, unscrupulous Gordon Gekko.
Problem is, the young guy works for a reliable outfit and is taught to be honest.
Gekko is anything but, and the film is one of moral and ethical corruption.
One might imagine this is a preachy drama, this is not.
This is a financial thriller, and an ideal time capsule of the unruly 1980’s.
News then was awash with corporate raiders, day traders, and firms like Salomon Brothers.
Michael Douglas as Gekko is a powerhouse.

Never Cry Wolf - 1983 - 6/10

Government biologist is assigned to tundra wilderness to study caribou.
In essence, what is thinning the caribou herds? Wolves?
Charles Martin Smith plays the researcher who, ostensibly, goes “native”.
No bonding with any wolves, but becoming tolerated by the pack.
Low-key film feels like a documentary, which is not a bad thing.
As expected, the visuals are sweeping, and this benefits from an evocative Mark Isham score.
“Message” is buried in the film, a sly touch.

Windy Riley Goes Hollywood - 1931 - 5/10

Based on a comic strip, brief adventures of an ineffectual blowhard.
He somehow winds up in Hollywood as an under-assistant, screwing up everything.
Unfunny comedy, tedious script, obnoxious leading man.
Why watch? Fatty Arbuckel directs, following his blacklisting.
Louise Brooks in her first talkie after returning from Europe.
Tempting for fans of either actor, but still a poor film.