Vultural

News From Home - 1976 - 6/10

Young Chantal Akerman moved from Belgium to New York in 1971.
Pre-Internet, she received steady correspondence from family, especially nagging Mother.
Later, once back in Europe, she decided to return to New York, film locations, and read her mother’s letters.
Not quite a documentary, and many viewers have found this terribly slow.
My wife, a native New Yorker, was increasingly mesmerized. At one point she even commented, “That’s the garment district.”
Aging New Yorkers may appreciate, and I suspect it was intriguing to Europeans in the 1970’s.
A better time capsule of New York from that period might be Kojak.
Even earlier, N.Y.P.D. aired in the 60‘s and shows an even grittier Gotham.

Dark Doors - 1974 - 6/10
AKA - Emma, Puertas Oscuras

Early José Ramón Larraz psychological shocker.
Emma has been in an accident. Head injury.
After her release she appears less than stable. If she ever was.
In many regards, she is childlike, shy, quiet, yet possessing a fearful temper.
And does that ever play out, explosively, unexpectedly, throughout this film.
Audio commentary by Bryan Martinez by turns enlightening, repetitive.

Submarine - 2010 - 6/10

Quirky overload in this coming-of-age romantic comedy set in Wales.
Depressed, low key youth meets moody, rebellious girl.
His parents are oddballs, the neighbor is mullet wearing, New Age motivational speaker.
Mostly set in school, the few students showcased are weirdos.
Nicely acted by newcomers, though cutesy script felt like a sack of marshmallows.
Fans of eccentric overload will enjoy this more than I.

Mary Beard’s Ultimate Rome: Empire Without Limit - 2016 - NA (not finished)

Comments about Paxman’s Britain’s Great War can be applied to this documentary in spades.
Ms Beard, a prestigious Cambridge don, is enthusiastic and infectious.
Again, though, she is in every single scene. Including bits where she is walking or driving.
She is also given to odd facial expressions, contortions, grimaces, which I found distracting.
I wanted to watch this. I wanted to like it.
Perhaps there is a clause in celebrity presenter contracts, that they must appear in 75% of the footage.
Overload for me. Bummer.

Dokument: Unterwasser Festung R’lyeh - 2047 - 8/10
AKA - Document: Underwater Fortress R’lyeh

Tantalizing what-if footnote in World War II history.
Between October and December 1944, the HMS Helford, frigate in the South Pacific, discovered wreckage of a German submarine, U-603.
To this day, anything related to the incident remains classified by the Admiralty.
Such as, what was a British frigate doing in the South Pacific? Aside from its commander (Charles George Cuthbertson), nothing is known of HMS Helford.

Fortunately, recently unearthed materials near Wewelsburg Castle provide a glimpse into the German side of the mystery.
U-603, reported missing in February 1944, had been sent midway between New Zealand and the southern tip of South America.
Aside from crew and Kapitän Hans-Joachim Bertelsmann, there were two scientists, an anthropologist, an archaeologist, a linguist, and Obergruppenführer Reinhard Heydrich, reported to have been assassinated in 1942.
By 1944, the war was going badly for Germany, but this unit was following clues written by a reclusive Rhode Island scholar. Supposedly, there were undersea ruins and a force of unspeakable power at the coordinates 48°52.6′S 123°23.6′W.
In the vast nowhere of the South Pacific, the area was known as R’lyeh.

Apparently, U-603 found the ruins, titanic in scale. A yawning entrance, equally immense, appeared to descend.
According to the dive team, within the structures were compartments, inexplicably dry.
That, and there was “something.”

The final transmission from the u-boat indicated that Heydrich and specialists were going into the ruins, with the intent of subduing and controlling the “something” that had been found.
At that point, the documentary sidesteps into a trove of speculation, theories and nonsensical, Cassandra like warnings that become ludicrously far-fetched. And tiresome.
This is packed with newsreel footage, maps, vintage radio messages, superb drawings, a few reenactments, and a gallery of talking heads.
The first 3/4 of this is outstanding. The final twenty minutes were, frankly, preposterous.
I docked my score a point for that. That said, I added a point for the sheer incongruity in the producers choice of narrator: Robin Leach.
A sample of the prose, delivered in his over the top voice, “… deeper into the ghastly, gargantuan chapel of grotesqueries and grim menace …” or “… as a coruscating crescendo splashed flames into minds shattered by the crepuscular crypt poised over the chasm of …”
Pure lunacy, and a must-see documentary!

Death Diner Disciples - 2047 - 6/10

“… The roadside diner, tattered remnant of the American Dream, now fading into twilight.
Not your ordinary diner, either, this is set 200 yards off State Route 101, accessible though an overgrown dirt track.
Behind the cafe, beyond the trees, lies the South Bay, breeding home for things best left unspoken.
Tonight, especially tonight, the unwary are drawn in.
A double date, two loud males who intend to plunder the innocence of their college dates.
Their giggling victims, wide eyed and smiling, are a murderous duo, having butchered a dozen in as many months.
Pastor Calvin, expelled by his flock for drunkenness, marches west, ever west.
Delia, fleeing a final police summons, backpacks into the woods, towards the darkening skies.
Finally, the lost traveler, Vincent Davies, architect, taking a shortcut … into Hell.
For tonight … is Samhain.”

So goes the opening narration for this el cheapo.
(To my mind, producers ought to have hired a Rod Serling voice impersonator.)
After the opening, black vehicles arrive and numerous robed individuals emerge.
Acolytes of, yeah, who would have predicted, Cthulhu.
Very busy narrative with 36 different plots. Don’t even try to keep up.
Acting is grade C, the script seems written by attention deficit disordered minds, and there are audio sync problems.
Not to mention insane logical errors.
Like, all of a sudden the diner has electrical power?
Or, the diner, nestled in an overgrown thicket, relocates to the shore line? How?
Terrible across the board.
I would rate this lower, but for the untimely ends of the film participants, and for urban legends regarding those who disrespect M. Cthulhu.

Godzilla Vs Cthulhu - 2047 - 7/10

Cranky lizard with paint peeling breath confronts the tentacled lord of R’lyeh.
Somnambulant buildup of greedy developers trying to seize a small, impoverished seaside monastery.
(Ever notice developers are always greedy, always bullying poor folks?)
Valiantly, the Sisters Of Graceful Tides hold a music concert to raise funds.
Shonen Knife, screeching a cover version of Blue Öyster Cult’s “Godzilla,” icurs the wrath of Godzilla who always hated the chorus. Squawking and flaming, he crashes ashore.
Then, as terrified screams and howls somehow fuse into “Ph’nglui mglw’nafh Cthulhu R’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn,” you guessed it, dread Cthulhu heaves from the waves.
At this point, the Japanese fondness for hentai results in truly horrifying erotic grappling, which will not be elaborated upon further.
The pace hits overdrive and action roars nonstop. Yakuza hitmen arrive, as well as vegan mercenaries on Vespa scooters, nude nuns with knives, parachuting Russian bodybuilders, a squad of over-sexed female lifeguards, and an annoying old alcoholic woman in a squeaking wheelchair.
Red hot flames - roasted brains - blood oath claims - gangbang chains - putrid stains
In other words - absolute must see classic!

Versus - 2000 - 7/10
AKA - ヴァーサス

Now you’re talking!!!
Third film by Ryûhei Kitamura placed him on the radar of Asian fanboys worldwide.
Samurai, yakuza, escaped convicts, bounty hunters, zombies, damsel in distress.
Swords, knives, handguns, machine guns, heavy weapons, plenty of fistfights.
In a nutshell, within ten minutes, protagonists arrive in an accursed forest, place where yakuza had dumped whack jobs for years.
The dead begin to revive, most clutching still-lethal handguns.
Kick ass actioner looks like a million bucks, and appears very low-budget.
Clinic for young filmmakers on how to film brilliance on a shoestring.

Tumbbad - 2018 - 7/10

“The world has enough for everyone’s need, but not enough for everyone’s greed.” Gandhi

Rainswept, rural India, 1912. Mother “tends” to an old man, hoping her services will result in money.
Her children are observant, especially the oldest son.
Mom’s activities involve risk, though reward seems incalculable.
And years later, the grown son climbs down, ever down, into the ugly pit of wealth.
Film does an exceptional job with atmosphere and settings.
The story weaves myth, human frailty, curiosity, avarice.
Indeed, once underway, greed is the core of this terrific horror film.
The less you know before watching, probably the better.

Ebola Syndrome - 1996 - 7/10

Somewhere, this tasteless, trashy, over the top, gleefully perverse Hong Kong Cat 3 masterpiece is flying off the shelves.
Anthony Wong may be best known as the villain in Hard Boiled or Untold Story, but for sheer sleazy glory, this one is in a category all by itself.
Without giving too much away, after he rapes his boss’s wife, then kills her and his boss, lowly cook flees to Africa.
There is a massive outbreak of ebola, so he and a buyer drive to an infected village to buy dead cows cheap.
Blinded by lust, the cook jumps a corpse and catches the incurable.
Only, instead of dying, he becomes a carrier.
As soon as he realizes that, sharing time begins.
Hong Kong bad boy director, Herman Yau, made many films like this, but this exploitative jewel is the best.

Boot, Andy - Fragments Of Fear

A reference book I reread every handful of years. Each time, I scribble a lengthy to-view list, watch a half dozen, lose my list, then shift viewing to something else in my scatter-brained obsessions.

Personal, opinionated survey of English horror cinema up to 1995.
From Tod Slaughter to Hammer to Norman Warren. From inept duds to box office hits, from the gruesome to the sublime. I calculate this book breezes over 300 titles.
Studded with black and white photos, this sweeps across decades, studios, and creators.
Mr. Boot is a cheeky reviewer, yet one gathers he has actually seen these films to closing credits, and has a genuine fondness for them.

Creation Cinema was an imprint I used to chase after. Now I’m down to a fistful of books.
Lesson learned: never loan books. Not to family, not to coworkers, not to cute classmates.

To Kako (Evil) - 2005 - 6/10
AKA - Το Κακό

Zombies overrun Athens.
Filmed for what looks like $834.00, the movie compensates with energy, heart and restraint.
Yes, restraint. Early, when potential meals start running, the film goes split screen.
Awesome! And, to their credit, the creators only do this a few more times.
There are sequences shot from the zombies p.o.v. Again, only done a handful of times.
I have seen so many horror flicks that reuse trick photography until you say, “Enough already.”
Several good (funny) combat standoffs include the outdoor cafe, and hideout.
The audio commentary is another highlight.
3-4 of the creative crew discuss the cast, budget limitations, camera tricks, audience reception.
And what inspired them, including Ang Lee, Lelouch’s “A Man And A Woman” and Bergman’s “Persona”!!
Unarguably, the best Greek zombie film I have ever seen.

Rigor Mortis - 2013 - 7/10
AKA - 殭 屍

How did this nifty Hong Kong gem fly under my radar?
Actor whose career is on the skids checks into a ramshackle high rise.
Suspends the noose, kicks the stool away, only to get rescued.
Building is a way-station or limbo or purgatory or simply a dump. Take your pick.
Marketed as Horror, this is way too artsy and moody for cheap thrill seekers.
Suffice to say the building conceals souls that will not rest.
Dead - undead - unhappy dead - humans with a death wish.
Dazzling, inspired visuals. Plenty of “wow, look at that” moments.
Like Del Toro’s Crimson Peak (which I did not care for overall) this drips style.
Moody first half, spells and conflict punctuate the second half.

Killing Small Animals - 2020 - 6/10

Wordless short from Sweden designed to appall and quietly succeeds.
PETA supporters, peruse the title, please.
A wife, going about her daily routine, still finds time for unsettling diversion.
Imagine, from smaller to larger.
Disturbing and well done.
Again, animal lovers, beware.

The Fall Of The House Of Usher

Short - 2004 - USA

Narrator goes to visit old friend, “Roger” Usher, then helps entomb recently deceased sister.
Truncated version is a mix of black n white sketches, animation and claymation.
The house resembles a condemned doll house, minimally furnished.
Piano score is spare and moody.
Curio, worth a look, though might be regarded as akin to a student project.

Zanik Domu Usheru - 1982 - Poland

Experimental Polish short in high contrast black and white.
Unseen narrator (Polish) tours the ruined Usher manor.
Creative stop motion photography indicates spreading decay or genuine weirdness.
No actors. Rather, furniture moves on their own, Madeline’s coffin slides to its end.
Point of view shifts from time to time, though my chief problem was reading subs instead of paying full attention to the hypnotic camera work.
Not overly surreal nor indecipherable as others have mentioned.

La Chute de la Maison Usher - 1928 - France

Full length, French retelling that tends to over linger and hold scenes too long.
Visuals are often quite arresting, and much of the camera work seems hand held
The spacious maison Usher is remarkable. albeit exceedingly drafty.
Music ranges from out of place Renaissance to discordant piano.
I enjoyed a lot of this, but the stagnant pace had me checking the time.

Short - 1928 - USA

Short, from near the end of the Silent era, highly Expressionistic.
Multiple exposures, distorted angles, brooding shadows, prism effects.
No intertitle cards, film creators assume viewer is familiar with Poe’s story.
Madeline’s clothes are elegant Art Deco attire.
This has been recently remastered and has a brief, spoken introduction.
Likely to rewatch this version again.

Quatermass And The Pit - 1967 - 7/10
AKA - Five Millions Years To Earth

Excavation crews, working deep under the Hobb’s End Underground station, start finding skulls.
Archaeologists quickly arrive, soon discover a huge metallic object.
Military bomb experts realize it is not metal, while other members dig up the dark history of Hob’s Lane.
Extremely intelligent script, based on the legendary BBC serial from the late 50’s.
Creative mix of Horror, SciFi, ancestral memory, superstition.
One of Hammer’s best.

The VVitch - 2016 - 7/10

Tried to avoid reviews and hype swirling around this one.
17th century colonials are ejected from the fortified plantation for unclear reasons.
One gathers the family head is a malcontent and religious troublemaker.
The family relocate to the edge of the forest and go it alone.
Hard luck trails them like blight.
Austere film, desaturated colors, slow pace, dialogue lifted from very old journals and court proceedings.
These are souls adrift and their backstory is barely hinted at.
The family departed England for a reason, were subsequently ejected from the colony for likely the same.
Brilliantly conceived and executed arthouse horror, but this mood piece will not be to all tastes.

X-Files S02 - 1995 - 8/10

I enjoyed the first season, but I rarely return to it, save for an episode or two.
For many, the second year was when the series really began to flower.
The leads were no longer shrill or strident, the writing far more original, the narratives more layered.
New characters - adversaries or allies - followed their own agendas, morally indifferent.

At this point, creative elements of the series were on fire.
Stories often played out over several episodes.
By turns harrowing, flat out funny, or achingly poetic.

Planets and stars only stay in perfect alignment for so long.
The show went south for me after the location shifted to Los Angeles (closer to FOX money men perhaps?).
Much altered, not necessarily for the better.
Season 02 of X-Files remains spectacular, though.
I try not to rewatch too often, lest its magic go stale.

Monsters Wanted - 2013 - 7/10

Entertaining behind the scenes documentary on Asylum Haunted Scream Park.
The site is a sprawling 40 acres outside Louisville, with four dedicated horror areas.

https://www.hauntworld.com/haunted-house-in-louisville-Kentucky-asylum-haunted-scream

Doc follows Rich and Janel, a well adjusted enough couple, and their labors to get everything in place before opening day.

Surprise visits by inspectors, backstabbing rival horror parks, rain and more rain, temperamental actors - including one who seems borderline certifiable, complaining business partners, equipment malfunctions, running out of money, as the opening deadline shrinks from months to weeks to days to hours.
You wonder how they can possibly get it done.
Will hold your interest from start to finish, might even plant the urge to get out Halloween night.
For anyone who is a repeat customer of haunted parks, for anyone who ever worked a Midnight Mansion, for anyone who took a stab creating their own Death House*, this film ought to be in your queue.

Admittance - One Candy Bar
^

Yes, back when I was eight or nine I can up with this brilliant notion of creating our own haunted house.
We would charge one candy bar per admission. No cause for us to rush all over the neighborhood Trick or Treating.
Our victims would do the legwork, then pay to stroll our horrors.
Candy for free! Our bags were going to burst!
Alas, the best laid plans of nine year olds . . .
Few entered. Those that did reported back that our haunted palace - an empty garage - sucked.
(An early lesson how dreary reviews can kill Broadway openings, new record releases, lemonade stands, or haunted houses.)
There were less than ten bars to share between the five of us.
Worse, we had missed Trick or Treat night, and all the other kids blamed me and my stupid idea!
Shunned me for days.
Over the years, there would be more stupid ideas where that came from. Many more.
^

Only Lovers Left Alive - 2013 - 7/10

My bride phoned from the library, vampire movie in hand. John Hurt, Tilda Swinton.
Sure, get it, I said.
I flipped the box when she brought it home and, Jim Jarmusch! Oh, no!
Film not as self-indulgent or pretentious as feared.
Story of two intellectual vampires, enduring the centuries.
Dreamy, drowsy, slow paced, filmed in nighttime Tangier and Detroit.
Film raises several points, one being the dire consequences of tainted blood.
Dark irony of the food supply being so self destructive.
Terrific use of brooding music, conversations delivered in monotone, and the feeblest of lighting to cast an aura of weariness.
Definitely worth chasing down, but it is lethargic and demands patience and concentration.
Note: For anti-Jarmusch types (such as myself) this was a nice one.

The Babadook - 2014 - 7/10

Disclosure: I don’t like kids, especially undisciplined, over-indulged kids.
I have a problem with single mommies and sons who are way too touchy feelie.
I also dislike any film where children are in danger, a cheap trope of terror.
Chances are, if you are a parent - enjoy rambunctious children - or see nothing wrong with a 7 year old who still sleeps in Mom’s bed, you may adore this.

Outstanding acting from Essie Davis as distracted, still grieving mother whose husband died seven years earlier.
As well as newcomer Noah Wiseman who is extraordinarily annoying with his fears, homemade weapons, creepy acts toward other children, and clinginess. To be fair, who allowed this child to be so? Yes, good ole Ma.
For the bedtime read, he discovers the Babadook (a bad book?) book.
Apparently, merely by reading, the ‘dook is summoned forth.
In no time flat, the dumpy home sounds with late night knocks, groans, deep sighs, ebony shadows.
Real or imagined? The film never lets on the for the longest time.
Meanwhile, mother and son behavior declines noticeably, and others take note.
Much as I appreciated the acting and deft, slight of hand directing, I disliked the characters intensely and wanted them eaten.

Penny Dreadful - 2014 - 6/10

Season one of esoteric Horror, set in Victorian London.
Vampires, the Frankenstein creature, even Dorian Gray, all promenade through gas lit alleys, rat infested wharves, or hothouse atriums.
A good series for language buffs, as conversations are rich, arch, almost stilted.
Precise words, layered meanings, from drawing rooms to theatre boards.
The core of the narrative, the arc, is the classic quest. A guilt ridden father searching for a stolen daughter.
He has money enough to create a team, who in turn, provide their own shadowed backstories.
For those concerned, the S01 ending will not leave you hanging.

Welp - 2014 - 6/10
AKA - Cub

Inventive, gruesome, intense, all kinds of wrong horror, clearly in the slasher genre.
A pack of cub scouts head into the woods for camping fun.
Two of their den masters know locals shun the area.
Suicides and disappearances have left a dark legacy.
Almost forgot, one of the den leaders brings his dog.
Although the boys are ages 9-12, this Belgium horror ride is not for kids.
Children … a dog … understand - no one is safe. Parents and dog lovers, this is not Disney.
Musical score is a synthesizer throwback.
Woods are packed with Rube Goldberg traps.
Hollywood remake highly unlikely. Red meat for slash fans.

Two reviews have been posted on this edit.

Blade Runner (1982) The Nexus-7 Cut - Krausfadr

Blade Runner - The Nexus-7 Cut - Krausfadr

This is superb work.

Journey To The Planet Of Gods (Prometheus) - Agent 9

“Prometheus” retro gem will remind some of Rogue-theX abandoned (?) “Star Wars” deconstruct.
Here, the good ship and crew, deciphering the roadmap left by creators, arrive at the home world.
The reception committee is not the Welcome Wagon.

Filesize = 250 MB. Video = 640 X 262p AVC. Audio = 112 kbps AAC 2-Channel Stereo.

Massive amounts of plot, character development, and dialogue are jettisoned.
In their place are sequences from 1977’s “The War In Space” (惑星大戦争).
Audio and video are degraded, in keeping with a lost film, recently found.
(Indeed, the quality resembles film stock found in Dawson City in 1978.)
This is a highly entertaining mess, and those who are weary of the seriousness of the original, and who have a taste for flipbook movies should chuckle away.
Maybe pour a stiff one first.