Trident

Handman said:

They hurt my feelings, and it wasn’t the first time. If I can’t have an honest conversation with them about it, what good is that? I don’t want to sound like a victim, I want to be able to talk candidly and honestly, and I am unable to get that from anyone I know. This person acts like a great friend sometimes, but I also get that general impression from time to time, and it really bothers me. They’re so closed off. I really should move on.

Why do you say I sound “like a victim”? All I want is a good friend. Someone who’ll let me just be a part of their life. Someone to just do things with whenever. Someone to confide in. Or just someone who’ll ask me how my day has been, and answer me the same question. Are these not the qualities you’d expect of a friend?

This day has been exhausting.

I think the problem’s that your idea of what a friend should be isn’t really a universal. I mean most people see a pal as someone they can hang out with to have fun or share adventures. You’re looking at it as a tie in to something more key and more emotionally supporting. Something deep and anchored in real meaning. Something very true and trusted strong.

A lot of friends wouldn’t really get that.

If you’ve had that kind of connection with this person and now that light’s off? Then I don’t necessarily think you need to move on. I think maybe you just need to give them a bit of space so they can feel less weight. I mean it’s a strain to carry emotional need. It’s a strain to bear someone else’s pain. It’s heavy sometimes. Sometimes it’s all we can do to get ourselves along fine. Sometimes hearing someone else’s problems or needs at the wrong moment can be exhausting. Sometimes it can use up what is really only a small reserve of empathy or understanding that usually takes a while to recharge. And I mean sometimes that well’s good and deep? But it can still be fed from a really slow trickling stream. If it’s tapped a couple times too often? It can run dry before it can refill.

It doesn’t mean they don’t care in general? And it doesn’t mean they wouldn’t give you more time and attention at a different moment in time. Sometimes it’s just the timing of your need and the timing of their ability to give you what you need are just not in sync.

I’d say care for them in the way you want them to care for you. In a true way. In a deep way. In a patient and understanding way.

Then you’ll help them recharge. And that’ll help them help you all the faster.

Peace Handman. I honestly wish you and I were closer. I see in you the kind of pal I’d honestly appreciate.

Truly.

Welcome man.

Welcome.

Alright. Immigration’s got a couple of problems? And a couple of pluses.

I see the illegal immigrants as the go-getters in a way. I mean these are the guys with the will and drive to make life better for themselves and their families. They’re not happy to get stuck in a rut. They’re the risk takers. They’re the kind of spirit that drove America to greatness in the past because we weren’t afraid to go to a new land an try something daring and hard.

So I think these guys should be given some tests to prove they’d be a good match for the rest of us? And then welcomed home with open arms.

Fast-track citizenship if you sign up for a 2 year tour in the army for example? Or if you can pass some other obvious loyalty test. I mean I don’t have all the answers. But something meaningful would help for sure.

The trouble with wide open doors tho is that it lowers the bar for how hard it is to get in. That means we stop just getting the hard workers and instead start getting waves of leeches. Guys who just figure it’s an easy win. So we have to have a hard, but fair way in.

Next problem is a lot of the time people leave their old country because the politics there are so much worse than possible. I mean even worse than we’ve got. But the trouble is people leaving don’t always realize they bring their politics with them. Sometimes it’s a good thing? As in a want to never repeat the same mistakes? But other times it can be a problem if they subconsciously want to recreate the very same problem they left behind. Because it’s what they know. Because it’s what seems normal for them. Because it’s what everyone in their “group” is voting into. Because somehow it’s comfortable in a way.

Maybe one fix for the fast-track system would be to only let immigrants vote after a period of time on their feet in America? I mean that would keep the temptation low to pander their way? And would keep us from getting a sudden wave of change in stable neighborhoods. I mean not all change is bad of course. But it’s harder when someone who hasn’t grown up in an area comes in in a group and changes things than it is if it’s done by groups who first take the time to mix in with local ways first and then suggest change later.

Or something.

Handman said:

Mrebo said:

Yeah, as Dom says, lots we don’t know. And more a matter of finding happiness, love, whathaveyou, more than a “date.”

Indeed. That’s why I’ve never really focused on finding “dates”. I want a meaningful friendship with someone. I don’t have zero friends, but I don’t have any meaningful ones.

I think I’ve mentioned before that I just moved back from an even worse situation at the end of last year. It’s better to have nothing than shit.

I’d say just pick another site. The one I’m on has given me a lot of hits even though I’ve got a horrible profile with no good pics. I’d serve it to you? But it’s a religious site. So probably not helpful.

Just for the sake of having this clear?

What do you guys think are the pros and cons of loose immigration? I mean what’s the main thing we’re fixing/wrecking with this?

This is still my favorite thread.

By far

Handman said:

My four year anniversary of being an official member here just passed by five days ago.

Hey congrats man. Four years? For some reason I figured you on being deep establishment. Like maybe belonging to a 10 year stretch. Or something?

Anyway. Glad you’re here in a steady way

moviefreakedmind said:

Mrebo said:

moviefreakedmind said:

http://money.cnn.com/2018/05/31/media/samantha-bee-apologizes-ivanka-trump/index.html

Samantha Bee calls Ivanka Trump a feckless cunt in response to the for some reason viral photo of Ivanka with her toddler. I don’t get the controversy over this particular photo or the controversy over this line. I do know that Bee shouldn’t have apologized. The people mad at her for saying it won’t forgive her and her supporters will just perceive it as weakness.

They should cancel her show!

I’m actually surprised every time I hear she still has a show.

She probably won’t, but they may put her on hold for a while. Again, don’t cancel the fucking show. This, unlike Roseanne, is a comment that isn’t broadly offensive but is rather just an insult to a political figure. Canceling everything over “offensive” language is a slippery slope.

Yep.

But I mean Roseanne’s show was annoying at best. Her comparing someone to an animal was poor taste at best.

But comedians have been doing that for ages (Trump as an orangutan for example) so cancelling a whole show because of the tweet of 1 cast member is sort of stupid in its own way.

Producers should’ve just got her to make an episode where she was compared to a hippo and had her work through her feelings on it.

I don’t know. I guess I’m just thinking being oversensitive sort of short-changes the chances to actually fix problems instead of just muffling them up.

Or something

suspiciouscoffee said:

Trident said:

suspiciouscoffee said:

aaaalll we are is nothing in nothing in nothing i need to sleep im not okay

I’m here for you man. Hope tomorrow’s got more feeling for you

Thanks. Had an existential crisis last night. I think I’m fine now.

I’m glad to hear you’re ok buddy

I want you to be right. Because I so much like reading your reasoning to things?

But I’ve got a hard time thinking that’s it either.

Of course it’s possible the kids just showed up. I mean in the wrong place at the wrong time.

It’s possible.

DominicCobb said:

Trident said:

CatBus said:

Depending on demographics, bringing kids is pretty much synonymous with bringing people.

The median age in Gaza is 18, way under the global average. Almost exactly half of the population is kids.

That seems like a pretty weak reason.

Seriously.

Maybe the people at fault here aren’t the kids or the kids’ parents? Just a thought.

Kids’ parents. Sending kids to face soldiers. In a situation that’s usually been far from peaceful.

But its not their fault. How could they have known they couldn’t trust the soldiers? Or the mob? Or hysterics?

Hmm

CatBus said:

Depending on demographics, bringing kids is pretty much synonymous with bringing people.

The median age in Gaza is 18, way under the global average. Almost exactly half of the population is kids.

That seems like a pretty weak reason.

Seriously.

Who brings their kids to something wild like that?

moviefreakedmind said:

suspiciouscoffee said:

It’s not really about mfm himself not voting, but him being a part of a massive group (perhaps majority) of non-voters who could together make real change if individually could be convinced to vote.

This is a bad line of reasoning. First of all, I hated our candidates. Yes, Hillary would’ve been infinitely better than Trump but I hate a lot of what she stands for and plus she and her DNC cronies cheated at every turn. Voting for her would’ve been selling out and degrading and disgusting to me. Also, I don’t like the idea that we just need more people to vote. Most people shouldn’t be voting. Most people are really dumb. What if someone who isn’t voting would vote for a really horrible candidate like Trump? I definitely don’t want them to vote. Basically, if you don’t vote, you’re a problem. If you vote your conscience and vote for a third party, you’re a problem too. You can’t win in people like Frink’s eyes unless you lower yourself to voting for the lesser of two evils. Staying inside and relaxing after another long and shitty day at a shitty job is more appealing to me than pointlessly participating in whatever passes for democracy in this country.

Yeah. I sort of agree with you on this score.

Handman said:

I listened to the theme of Imitation of Life, and it made me think of the movie again. I cried nearly as much as when I watched it.

Life is so empty.

And now you’ve got me watching it

suspiciouscoffee said:

aaaalll we are is nothing in nothing in nothing i need to sleep im not okay

I’m here for you man. Hope tomorrow’s got more feeling for you

TV’s Frink said:

This might be more practical and affordable.

https://jet.com/product/Costway-Steerable-Foldable-Knee-Walker-Scooter-Turning-Brake-Drive-Cart-with-Basket-Black/e14dfa7f068f4bd58b455db01da0f990?jcmp=pla:ggl:nj_roc_gen_health_beauty_a1:health_beauty_medical_supplies_equipment_mobility_aids_equipment_a1:na:PLA_1062281700_50860664103_pla-302058095419_c:na:na:na:2PLA15&pid=kenshoo_int&c=1062281700&is_retargeting=true&clickid=76df3416-ca0e-4a67-acbd-54fab7a1ece3&kclid=76df3416-ca0e-4a67-acbd-54fab7a1ece3&gclid=EAIaIQobChMIsprG2tiA2wIVDI1pCh1KPw4ZEAQYAyABEgLiafD_BwE

Someone at my office had something similar for a while after he broke his foot.

Someone had a bike left over after the kids grew up and thought, “What the hell can I do with this now?”

My social circle’s so small I don’t even.

But every now and then I manage to find a sort who’ll put up with a few hours of together time just long enough for me to burn back out and remember why I can’t have cool friends.

I read this thread. Through and thru.

But never have anything random to say?

Damn.

I think this thread needs this about now.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SraaOCwRnbA

Because it’s ah. Slightly political.

You’re welcome.

moviefreakedmind said:

chyron8472 said:

The “ask anybody on the street” argument doesn’t really work because people also describe heaven as having pearly gates (when that actually is the Holy City in Revelation), or God being an old man with a long white beard, or to attribute proverbs to the Bible that it doesn’t say (like “money is the root of all evil” or “God helps those who help themselves.”)

That’s true, but the Bible does describe hell as the way people tend to think of it.

Look. The best I can offer up is a slice of my own pie.

When I was against God and apart from him? My life was all about me. There weren’t any limits to the hurt I could flame myself with. There wasn’t any reason to stop doing what I wanted. The tap was wide open.

Giving God a real stare gave me the sense to put on gloves and stop burning down my own house.

I’d say it was an experience. Sort of like going from hell to heaven.

So I don’t know if that helps?

TV’s Frink said:

I’m just sitting at my computer, shaking my head that someone can think this way.

And that comparison is terrible.

And “nicer” is a terrible way to try and describe the difference between a rapist/murder and someone who isn’t convinced that Jesus was resurrected and is the son of God.

And some people in this thread wonder why I think religion is a terrible, terrible thing.

I was trying to show the difference between the level of conversion. I mean good analogies are hard to pull up at the best of times. So I’m sorry it wasn’t the perfect setting.

The analogy I gave was based on the couple doing the inviting. It was based on them choosing who to invite and who not to.

In that sense it seems reasonable they’d be more likely to invite someone who’d been a lot more terrible in the past. But who’d made an effort to change course. Than they’d be for a guy who’d made no real effort at all. In spite of not really doing much wrong in the past.

TV’s Frink said:

Trident said:

TV’s Frink said:

Hmmm…you believe different than I do? Ok, you’re going to be tortured forever after you die.

Oh, and that other guy who led a terrible life, raped, robbed, murdered, kicked puppies and pushed down old ladies, but accepted Jesus as his savior right at the end? He’s a better person than you are.

Nah, doesn’t seem like a shitty belief system at all.

A guy who accepts getting saved at the end isn’t gonna fool God if he’s not sincere. And if he’s sincere? Why wouldn’t that matter?

I mean how would such a guy have heard of Jesus anyway if not for someone else taking time to point it out to him. Someone who noticed he was on a destructive path and took a lot of effort to help him onto a better one?

I don’t know why you’d be against the idea that even a horrible person could find a way to redeem themselves. I mean can criminals be rehabilitated or not? Should we lock people up forever on a 1st offense? Or should we give them other chances?

A rapist and murderer who legitimately gives his life to Christ is less of a sinner than me. That’s just stupid.

Why?

I mean what’s the end game in your eyes exactly?

It’s sort of like saying a guy who was a really swell guy, but who never quite got over his racism should still be invited to the mixed wedding party instead of the former head of the local KKK who publicly backed out of his past ways and begged a sincere apology of the couple who then forgave him.

I mean is who was ‘nicer’ on a daily really the important thing here?

When we talk about progressive, what’s the end game? I mean what are we progressing towards exactly and when will we know we’ve gotten there?

And once we get there? Will the progressive become the conservative in order to keep it there?