EddieDean

evansj1983 said:

I suppose we should also consider his lines in the few episode of TCW he’s in (at least the ones that were Ahmed Best) if the goal is to have as much as possible to construct new words/phrases.

That’s a really good shout. Is anyone able to provide a list? (Could copy my spreadsheet to use as a template, then I’ll merge them?) I’ve watched those episodes to death for my edit, please don’t make me watch them again! 😉

CaptainFaraday said:

Damn, Eddie, that was fast!

Well, I’m motivated! I’ve just finished adding the time codes to the spreadsheet - no other info there yet though.

I’ve also just finished editing TPM down into just 18 minutes containing all of JarJar’s lines, all with a video timestamp. That’s rendering now and I’ll upload it soon. But it should give anyone who wants to edit JarJar’s voice the right tool to have all the sources, all the lines to change, and decent enough video to lipsync, that they can then extract their new audio from it in high quality to reinsert easily into their own edit. I’ve created that file in a way that I can easily fix it, add sources from the other movies, or other languages, so if anyone has any further needs from it let me know.

(Actually, it’s rendering as a huge file - does anyone know how to output from Sony/Magix Vegas at lower video? Or my best option to downscale the video easily after it’s done? I have a bunch of tools, I just don’t have any brain left.)

I haven’t edited any lines yet, because I’ve run out of sanity. But the tool will soon be available to anyone to make editing his voice easier. Democracy!

Right, here’s the in progress Jar Jar voice polish spreadsheet. Just all 108 of his lines in order so far, but now I’ll go through and grab the timecodes (I’ve got them highlighted in my editing software). Figured I’d post the sheet now in case anyone wants to pick out priority lines, or if they want to spot good sources to make key words like ‘I’m’, etc, or other replacements.

I’ll also mark the sources as dirty or clean in terms of background SFX (so we know if they’re usable), and add context. Once it’s in that state, whether or not I output anything decent, it should be a good resource for anyone else who wants to have a play around on their own - and if anyone makes a fixed line, I’ll add it in here too.

I haven’t added his lines AOTC or ROTS yet, can anyone pinpoint those?

RogueLeader said:

EddieDean said:

Actually, screw it. I can see this task very clearly, I’ll pick it up. Editing Clone Wars needs a different type of free time, I can work on this Jar Jar voice idea without it distracting from it.

If you think it wouldn’t be too bad, that would be cool! Maybe you could play around with one or two lines just see if the idea will actually work.

Yeah, I’ll post a couple when I’ve had a play. Need to dig them all out first.

Actually, screw it. I can see this task very clearly, I’ll pick it up. Editing Clone Wars needs a different type of free time, I can work on this Jar Jar voice idea without it distracting from it.

Vladius said:

I liked that one that used the people getting shot at in Star Trek Insurrection. Kind of silly but it worked.

Which edit was that, Vladius?

Yeah, personally I’d rather conservatively improve Jar Jar than replace him entirely, but there shouldn’t be any competition in this thread; it’s all about ideas and assets, not decisions.

Data analysis is always a great start. Got something to do? Start with a spreadsheet and break that shit down.

I honestly don’t think tweaking up Jar Jar’s voice would be that much work, so long as the voice track is isolated from the music. He can’t have more than 50 relevant lines, and I think a little would go a long way. If I wasn’t focused on Clone Wars I’d pick this up right away.

It’s just about starting it in the right way- get the source file into an editor, watch it through slowly, with each line add it to a spreadsheet and maybe also add a little text over the corner of the video including the timestamp (for ease of future editors replacing it). Video doesn’t need to be high quality as it’s just to help line it up and check lipsync. Cut everything else out, leave the master voice track present (as a source) but muted, make a new voice track to copy to for mucking about with, render. Ideally as two different audio tracks in case people want access to the source still to make their own changes.

I know actually getting the voice right might be a bit of a challenge but he’s so loose and goofy that it must be easier than most to at least get it better than it is.

RogueLeader said:

Jar Jar Binks

In regards to Jar Jar, instead of totally dubbing him, I’m curious if it would be possible to play around with his dialogue to simply tone down his sometimes confusing Gungan dialect. A few examples:

“I spake” to “I speak”
“You saved my again” to “You saved me again”
“More did you spake?” to “More did you say?”
“Ex-squeeze-me, but de mostest safest place would be Gunga City” to “De safest place would be Gunga City”
“’Tis embarrassing. My afraid my’ve been banished. My forgotten. Da bosses would do terrible things to me. Terrrrrible things to me if me goen back dere” to “Tis’ embarrassing. I afraid I’ve been banished. I’m forgotten. Da bosses would do terrible things to me. Terrible things to me if I go back dere.”
“Wesa goen underwater, okeyday?” to “We go underwater, okay?”
“My warning you. Gungans no liken outsiders, so don’t spect a warm welcome” to “I’m warning you. Gungans don’t like outsiders, so don’t espect a warm welcome.”

Obviously how doable this would be would depend on how easy it is to isolate Jar Jar’s dialogue, and if you could find the right pieces to frankenbyte the dialogue changes. I recall Brian Blessed (who voiced Boss Nass) gave an interview where he said “I tried to make sure my noises didn’t interfere with dialogue”. He basically said that he thought that Jar Jar sometimes made noises on the line, and he has a lot of plot, so the audience would go, “What’s he saying? What did he say?” Anyway, I’m not saying Brian Blessed should be the authority on this, but I think it is a fair point.

And of course, basically every TPM edit in the past has toned down Jar Jar by cutting certain scenes or lines whole cloth, or muting Jar Jar’s voice, but I’m curious how possible it would be improve the dialogue that is necessary without overdubbing Ahmed Best’s performance. Because I think one issue with cutting a lot of Jar Jar is that if you cut too much Jar Jar, the edits feel less invisible as they should if you’re going for an edit that could pass as a theatrical release. This method might allow an editor to keep more Jar Jar, but make him less annoying. Another positive thing about this route would be that you probably could get away with these dialogue changes without Jar Jar’s mouth movements being noticeably off, since the CGI twenty years ago wasn’t as true-to-life as it can be now.

I think this idea has legs. I don’t think it’d be too tricky to start - one could watch through TPM and Jar-Jar’s couple of other appearances, taking notes in a spreadsheet of each line, timestamped. You’ve then got that for quick reference to identify your available replacement sounds. Isolate those lines in a working project to create common source replacement words (“I’m”, “I”, “Me”, etc), then take each line in place and replace what you can to tidy it up whilst preserving the meaning, ideally against the video to check for acceptable lip-sync.

Vladius said:

I’ve said this before but people use way too many all caps words in their crawls. If you look at the movies they only do one or two.

In chronological order each count is 0, 1, 0, 1, 0, 1, 3, 2, 6. So you’re right, and Rise of Skywalker (and the whole sequel trilogy) is an outlier. But I don’t personally think it’s a big issue - I think all caps is an easy tool to direct people’s attention to the core concepts.

Plus, you could just switch ‘invaded’ with ‘blockaded’ and ‘bring the Queen to safety on the capital planet of Coruscant’ with something like ‘negotiate a peaceful solution before the conflict escalates’ if you wanted to preserve the blockade angle.

Oof, just spotted something else to amend what I’d just said-

Queen Amidala (the figurehead) is the macguffin, Padmé (revealed in the third act as the true Queen) is a character with real agency. This way you don’t reveal that Padmé is Queen until the right moment.

Perhaps-

The GALACTIC REPUBLIC is failing. As
its Senate becomes more complacent,
QUEEN AMIDALA, elected ruler of the
planet Naboo, stands as a vocal champion
against corruption.

With the Republic’s ability to protect
its worlds diminished, the greedy TRADE
FEDERATION have invaded her home system,
in an attempt to force her compliance.

The Jedi Order, mystical wielders of
THE FORCE and defenders of the Republic,
have dispatched Jedi Knight QUI-GON JINN
and his apprentice to bring the Queen to
safety on the capital planet of Coruscant.

The key factions are the Galactic Republic (complacent, corrupt, unable to act), the Trade Federation (greedy, opportunistic), and the Jedi Order (protectors, mystical, act semi-independently of the Senate). The key characters are Queen Amidala (champion of democracy) and Qui-Gon (a Jedi Knight). The plot is escape from invasion.

Compare to the original crawl: The key factions are the Galactic Republic (in turmoil, bureaucratic), and the Trade Federation (objecting, greedy), and Jedi Knights (protectors, mediators, act on behalf of the Supreme Chancellor). The characters are the Supreme Chancellor (leader) and two Jedi Knights. The plot is taxation leading to blockade leading to negotiation.

With my suggestion you could perhaps do more to explain how getting the Queen to Coruscant might actually help (beyond just escape), but I think early dialogue captures some of that. It doesn’t explain what the force actually IS, nor does it hint at the dark power behind these events.

CaptainFaraday said:

So that gives us a solid backbone:

• The Trade Federation invasion is the simple well-defined threat we care about, that the main characters are invested in stopping.
• The solution is to get Padmé off planet to Coruscant, which they believe is their best chance.
• Qui-Gon is our main character driving this plot in line with that goal.

There’s your opening crawl.

Job done. What’s next?

ImperialFighter said:

EddieDean, I’ve just come across this excellent ideas/discussion ‘INDEX’ notion that you’ve come up with, and can see that you’ve put a lot of thought and effort into your first topic descriptions which focus on THE PHANTOM MENACE movie initially.

Great stuff, and you’re laying things out very comprehensively which will prove useful as this progresses.

I look forward to seeing what gets posted on each of your individual topic threads eventually, and hope to add a few of my own ‘personally subjective’ thoughts and ideas at some point, when time allows.

Thanks for your time and efforts with this - oojason will approve, I’m sure! 😃

Thanks! It’s not intended to tread on the toes of other movie threads or the radical ideas threads, so I hope it doesn’t do that. And similarly I know there are key index threads, but seem to serve the purpose of being comprehensive lists, whereas what I’m trying to do here is put together context for editors and idea generation.

RogueLeader said:

I’ve been thinking about the movie since you made this post, so I’ll share some random thoughts I’ve been having.

The Crawl

I like the direction of the crawl you posted, Eddie.

I think the big complaint of the original crawl is that it got people’s heads scratching before the movie even starts. The goal of the crawl should be clarify things for the audience. Get everyone on the same page, keep it simple. Think about the original Star Wars opening crawl. It gives some background, but we’re left with a few simple ideas: There’s a big, evil empire, and there’s a rebellion fighting against them. A easy to understand tale of underdogs fighting against tyranny. We also get the gist of the basic plot: the bad guys have a super weapon, and the good guys stole the secret plans for it. We also learn about Princess Leia and her crucial role in this mission.

With this TPM new crawl, there are a few key words used that I think help establish important themes or ideas for this trilogy: complacency, corruption, and greed. These words highlight the problems in the final years of the Galactic Republic, and it establishes people like Padmé trying to fight against this corruption, and personally paying a cost for it. I think centering Padmé as an important character in a new crawl is a great idea. It might do a better job at investing the audience in her journey from the get-go. Like you mentioned before, a common point made about this movie is how it feels like there isn’t a main protagonist. Maybe Padmé technically isn’t, but I think anything would help to give more characterization to this ensemble.

Brilliant set of thoughts, RogueLeader. Following your thoughts on the crawl/set up for the movie-

What you said about the fact that Padmé arguably isn’t a main character in this episode, but is still important to the plot, made me realise the following: Padmé IS the Death Star plans. The actual thrust of the movie, for the first three quarters, is that we have to get the Death Star plans to the rebellion. (We have to get Padmé to Coruscant.) If everything’s framed in that way, there’s a clear and simple goal for the main characters that’s easy for the audience to grasp. The character who keeps things moving in that direction is Qui-Gon (the analogue to Obi-Wan in ANH). Their chance encounter with Luke (Anakin) brings him into the fold while Qui-Gon is still working on the goal of bringing Padmé to Coruscant. The twist in TPM compared to ANH is that getting Padmé to Coruscant doesn’t help - they leave Coruscant dejected with the Death Star (Trade Federation invasion) still a threat. But the day is ultimately won by the allies they picked up along the way, and the unexpected gift of Luke (Anakin).

So that gives us a solid backbone:

• The Trade Federation invasion is the simple well-defined threat we care about, that the main characters are invested in stopping.
• The solution is to get Padmé off planet to Coruscant, which they believe is their best chance.
• Qui-Gon is our main character driving this plot in line with that goal.
• A chance meeting with Anakin makes him our second main character and suprise addition.
• On Coruscant, we learn that the Republic is not our salvation, and the plan changes. At this point Padmé picks up more agency (becoming our late-game third main character instead of the macguffin) and the party decide to act together to save the day.
• On Naboo, Padmé and Qui-Gon serve to further the new plan (failing and coming into jeopardy but still helping enable its success), but Anakin, our suprise addition, emerges as the hero whose actions defeat the invasion, saving the day.

Along the way, the rest of the content would be seen as world-building ideally handled as deftly as ANH did it - not too much cutting away from the main plot, giving the audience information in a sensible order, etc. Establishing the core setting (the state of the Galaxy) belongs in the crawl (but IMO should be whatever best sets up the Trade Federation invasion and Padmé as the solution clearly.) The rise of Palpatine is a background event that’s triggered by but doesn’t need to be central to the plot. The things that leave us with anticipation for a future movie are Qui-Gon’s twist death handing over his role to Obi-Wan, the Jedi’s doubts in Anakin, and the fact that a dark presence may have manipulated this plot for sinister ends.

Thinking about it like this, I’m led to another couple of thoughts:

1. If you set up the Republic as failing in the crawl, there’s (interesting?) doubt about whether the plan to get Padmé to Coruscant will succeed, and the reveal that they’re too bureaucratic to help will give the audience good evidence to hammer that point home. I also feel like the most valuable word to describe the Republic is complacent, because that best explains how these guys think they can get away with full-on invasion. (And going for invasion first, rather than blockade, not only gives you the actual threat in the crawl, but also avoids the fact that the blockade is replaced with a single ship by the climax.)
2. The Gungans aren’t vital. Since they are effectively used as a tool by Padmé in line with the party’s goals in the finale, they could still serve an edit, but if you had an alternative group for Anakin to save during the finale (say, shots of Naboo citizens being oppressed and surrounded by battle droids) they’d be skippable.
3. If we take Padmé as the macguffin, then the main force against her is Maul (as a tool of the unknown Sith Lord), and Maul’s use in that role should be emphasised. While Maul is alive, the threat against Padmé is emphasised. (I suppose we don’t actually need to know why he’s targeting her, with my suggested perspective, since targeting her still brings the core plot into jeopardy and Maul’s master’s motivations remain a mystery at the end of the film.) Therefore, I’d have the ending ordered as: Gungans draw out the forces from the city to enable the infiltration, and are captured (if we see them at all). The party infiltrate the palace to capture Nute Gunray. Anakin takes a ‘safe place’ in a ship, but Padmé is interrupted by the arrival of Maul, so the Jedi step in to stop him so she can continue the plan alone. We follow Padmé until she fails. Now the plan’s in real jeopardy. Maul is able to handle Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan at the same time, and when he kills Qui-Gon, we believe he’s more than a match for Obi-Wan, left dangling in a pit. He’s likely to kill Obi-Wan, and then he’s coming for the Queen. This is the point of highest jeopardy. Then roughly at the same time, we have Anakin destroy the ship and Obi-Wan destroy Maul. The invasion is defeated, saving the people, and Maul is killed, saving the Queen.
4. I wonder if more could be done to emphasise Anakin’s agency. Perhaps when he’s in the cockpit, we could hear echoes of dialogue we’ve already heard as he remembers them: “That’s a droid control ship.” “We will send the pilots we have to knock out the droid control ship.” “You catch on pretty quick.” “Mom, you say the biggest problem in this universe is nobody helps each other.” “There is no other way. I may not like it, but he can help you. He was meant to help you.” [Anakin turns on the ship and flies off to space.]
5. I think the biggest value add, which may now be more within our grasp, would be additional shots of the invasion being felt by the Naboo.

ImperialFighter said:

EddieDean said:

I’m trying to present this section from an ‘editor’s perspective’, highlighting the key plot points, structure, character development and interactions, topics of dialogue, scene linkages, references, etc. It’s in as close to original order as possible, with cut scenes placed in roughly the right place. Let me know if there’s anything relevant that I’ve missed.

EddieDean, I look forward to adding a thing or three to your ongoing series of topic threads eventually.

Just a little thing for now, but can you also include a description of the ‘deleted scene’ of Yoda arriving at Dagobah in this one too? - while I have my own firm preference of how I’d like to see it incorporated into a re-edit of the movie, perhaps you could just add it at the bottom of your scene descriptions if you don’t have a preference of your own. It’s not readily obvious where it should go, as there’s optional places to put it if anyone chooses to include it.

Isn’t that a Revenge of the Sith deleted scene? If there was one made for Phantom Menace though, I’ll add it in.

I partially agree- I think the modern TV shows mark the gold standard middle ground between OT-style and overdoing it like the prequels did. It feels like Disney have settled on the right aesthetic balance which feels like it fits with the OT whilst being a bit more modern. I’d like to see the PT content downgraded quite a lot, but the OT content upgraded just a little.

That is a fun slow realisation for the trilogy, especially with the chronological mindset, but I think my personal priority tends towards strengthening the individual movie by boosting Padmé’s character and taking out a few layers of political ambiguity.

Mrebo said:

EddieDean said:

Indeed!

I would say, one thing that I think I probably should encourage in the threads is staying on target and avoiding the particularly radical ideas. I’m talking things like comedy versions, black and white, heavy metal, replacing the language with an alternate track and doing it all as subtitles, etc etc. Those feel to me more like passion projects to create a truly alternative experience, rather than “a Star Wars movie you could have feasibly watched at the cinema”, like TROS Ascendent.

Beyond that, I’m on the fence about things like three-in-one movies or re-dubbing whole characters, but I think I should let the community make that call.

Disagreement welcome!

I think three-in-ones are a different animal but maybe the discussions will help inform those who want to go that way.

Yeah, I’d certainly be interested to hear about good approaches from three-in-ones that could help a one-on-one edit.

GMatias said:

This sounds like a great idea…

I would say, one thing that I think I probably should encourage in the threads is staying on target and avoiding the particularly radical ideas. I’m talking things like comedy versions, black and white, heavy metal, replacing the language with an alternate track and doing it all as subtitles, etc etc.

…up until that part 😃

(I kid! I kid!)

It’s still a really great idea! And I’m sure a lot of these topics & spinoff discussions will still be beneficial for us radicals, even if we aren’t working on something directly related to that particular idea. Sometimes a change of pace or line of thinking can get you seeing something else in a new light. I’m looking forward to taking part!

Haha, I meant more in terms of dubbing and subbing the entire movie, rather than just single characters. I totally get wanting to redub Jar Jar and Neimoidians.

Personally I prefer to keep voices which are used in other media (especially since I’m a Clone Wars adherent, though I don’t think Jar Jar speaks in my edit), but for movie-only viewings it makes a lot of sense.

CaptainFaraday said:

I wonder if there’s a way to hint at [Padmé/Naboo being the target to generate support for Palpatine as Supreme Chancellor] more in the movie? (Which may or may not work if it’s an edit that tries to keep Sidious and Palpatine separate, depending on how it’s done.)

I think this’d be tricky, as it’s a complex sequence of intentions to convey. I think you’d need to explicitly spell it out in the crawl, which feels to me like it’d put too much emphasis on the less interesting political plot.

I think personally my preference would be to have Padmé be explicitly one of the few voices for positive action / champions of the people / thorns in the side of corruption, in an increasingly bureaucratic/stagnant/complacent/corrupt senate. This is a role she’s shown strongly in during all other prequel content, and establishes her character for this episode well. (I know she’s not a Senator but as Queen she’s still shown as being given a voice in the Senate). But more importantly it would also explain why she’s both a threat to the established Republic order AND its enemies, including those within it who are greedy (Trade Federation, proto-Separatists), and those who seek to continue its demise (Sidious). It’d be good continuity with AOTC too, showing that the assassination attempt could be coming from within or without. The bloakcade and invasion could be both the Trade Federation’s objection to her and an attempt to make her appear politically weak, and as Sidious escalates the Trade Federation’s behaviour throughout the movie, his use of Maul works as both a ‘capture’ mission AND a ‘kill if you get the chance, to take her off the board’ mission.

Without overthinking it, the opening crawl could carry this information using something like:
“The Galactic Republic is failing. As its senate becomes more complacent, PADMÉ AMIDALA, elected Queen of the Naboo system, stands as a vocal champion against corruption. Threatened by her successes, the greedy TRADE FEDERATION have blockaded her planet, in an attempt to weaken her political power.” (Yes it’s still political, but it’s one paragraph, not three.)

“The Galactic Republic is failing” seems like both a good opening for the saga chronologically, and a good hook for those following the Original Trilogy. It is, after all, the background plot of the prequels. “To weaken her political power” works from two angles- initially implicitly by drawing her away from the Senate to protect her people, and later as the audience learn that they’re invading to ‘force a settlement’, to show the Galaxy that she caved easily.

You could potentially add something about the Republic’s inability to enforce peace even amongst its own systems, which would also serve two purposes - to help explain why the Trade Federation think that they can get away with planetary invasion as a form of coercion, but also to pay off later in this trilogy when it’s revealed that the Republic has no standing army.

Mrebo said:

The limited footage of the invasion doesn’t allow for a terribly flashy start (and is a little short for proper opening shots) but it’s more active and conveys more information more quickly. It is more of an ESB than ROTJ way of opening. I’ve considered whether new CGI shot(s) of the invasion could make for a stronger opening, not that I have the skills to do so, but also seems like a lot of work for relatively benefit.

I’ve added a new section in the OP, ‘changes editors would like to see’, to help aggregate things like this. This is the first item in the list.

Burbin said:

What are your thoughts on introducing the “scum and villany” on the opening text for A Strike at the Heart? To me that feels like a more natural place to do it, it introduces scummy bounty hunters wrecking havoc on the Republic capital, messing with both the senate and the Jedi. While the episode that follows this duology, Seven Warriors, subverts our expectations by showing honorable bounty hunters while introducing the scummy pirates.

I think this is OK. This represents the beginning of that rise, which continues more heavily in the next season. We’re hinting at the theme, before making it explicit.

As for some other thoughts on the text in ASatH, I don’t feel like you need to say Bane’s been hired by a Sith Lord, since that’s immediately revealed by Bane in a way that has more intrigue, likewise I find the text about Ahsoka being assigned to the library by Yoda odd, as we don’t really need an explanation as to why she’s hanging out in the library, you could simply state that Ahsoka continues her guard duties at the Jedi Temple or something simple like that just to remind the audience.

First point is a good shout - I think that’s legacy from where I initially used a different Bane opening. Explicitly having Ahsoka assigned to the library is because I put her original assignment to ‘the archive’ in another episode, and this episode’s content there continues the introduction, so I wanted to imply she was moving to a new location, and thus warranting a second introduction.

I don’t think there needs to be anything to add to it, Anakin says “I can’t let Bane get away!”, that’s enough to tell the audience “okay, if he doesn’t chase him down, he’ll get away!”

That’s a good point, thanks!

Guiguioh said:

CaptainFaraday said:

Two things I’d never realised until reading Eddie’s plot summary:

• Why does Sidious want to invade Naboo? Why the fixation on recapturing Padme?
• When exactly do Padme and the decoy switch places? She introduces herself to everyone as “Padme” when she’s pretending to be a handmaiden; do people not know that’s Queen Amidala’s first name?

1- Because the original plan was to get her to sign the treaty ( Palp thought she was young so easy to scare) to legitimize the occupation and create sympathy for him in the Senate so he could use it to win the next election ( Valorum had less than a year left on his mandate.) He never expected that Amidala would find her way to Coruscant. He just adapted after that and he got what he wanted even quicker. The old EU cover that story pretty well ( Cloak of Deception )

2- Amidala is a persona. Every queen of Naboo get one. Nobody knows Padme Naberrie is the queen of Naboo apart from a few selected people. Padme is just one of the handmaiden for the casual personnel. Canon book Queen’s Peril cover that in details. The first switch with Sabe in TPM as the decoy is just before they get captured (black dress.)

Thanks for this, I needed both points clarified too. Is it actually made explicit in the movie that Palpatine is from Naboo? It’s implied in the dialogue, but I don’t think it’s spelt out. Shame that the Amidala persona thing isn’t in the movie though.

RogueLeader said:

Mrebo on these forums recently had a good idea about using Anakin’s conflict with Sebulba as the party’s (and the audience’s) introduction to him, and then changing Anakin’s subtitles to have him explain why he’s brought them to Watto’s shop. This made our first introduction to Anakin one where he’s driving the plot and standing up for himself. And while it requires the shot of Jar Jar spitting a frog onto Sebulba, that element might be softened by the new context that “It’s the will of the force that we met”, though perhaps that’s a bit of a stretch.

Could you copy/link his comment regarding this idea? I was going to bring up a specific idea regarding Anakin’s introduction, but I’m curious what exactly he suggested for this.

Right here.

I completely agree. I think a lot can be preserved if it’s given the right context and the movie is paced well. A far more interesting opening would be an invasion (which we actually get to see the impact of), with Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan sent to Theed specifically to rescue the Queen, rather than to the belligerents to settle things diplomatically.

One idea I had to remedy the problem of them showing up with Jar Jar, could be to have him already be established as their local guide who helped them navigate the city to reach the Queen. By his following canon appearance he’s become a Junior Representative to the Naboo delegation - specifically a (junior) politician intended to bridge the divide between Coruscant and Naboo, and therefore a perfectly sensible person to serve as local knowledge for two Jedi Knights sent to Naboo to rescue the Queen. So, what if he’s already in that role during the Phantom Menace? It wouldn’t conflict with his poor relations with the other Gungans, either, and it would explain him continuing to travel with the Jedi/Padmé party better than just sticking around as he does in the movie. And doing all of this could unlock a trimmed opening that starts on the action where the plot really starts, with the Queen’s street rescue, the hangar breakout, and the blockade attack. That could easily feel like an intro which leads neatly into Act One, the discovery of Anakin - and there are plenty of expository scenes off Naboo which could give the audience that information even once they’ve left the planet.

Edit: Hell, you could even start with them travelling in the bongo then arriving to rescue the Queen, since the characters really introduce themselves to each other then. Then you’d get to see Jar Jar guiding the Jedi through some ‘secret underwater passages’ to traverse the planet without detection from the occupying army, demonstrating that local knowledge.

sade1212 said:

EddieDean said:

When that becomes a new thread’s OP at the appropriate time, I’ll add things like common objections, different official and fan sources, commonly edited changes, unique edit approaches, etc. I’ll add information about the context of the movie which might help focus an editor on their personal priorities, and list a few different goals that other editors have had. Anything that makes the process of actually thinking up new approaches and ideas more likely to occur.

That sounds fantastic (but also a bunch of work)!

…Turns out it was! This has taken about eight hours…