DuracellEnergizer

This truly is the end of an era.

I don't think I've brought up the Aing-Tii yet.

Darth Id said:

TV's Frink said:

Mara, a virgin, is forced to give up four bodily "fluids": vomit, urine, excrement, and blood from her hymen

What in the actual fuck?

 I know! How much vomit can you possibly get outta the hymen, anyway?

I don't think there are any emetophiles on this forum who can answer your question. 

Neglify said:

Inland Empire - 2.5 /5

You're being too generous. 

EXT. CORUSCANT -- 663 GASGAR VALLEY APARTMENT COMPLEX/LLOMON & MAHTTOH'S APARTMENT/BALCONY -- DAY 

Llomon stands over the balcony rail, peering out through his macrobinoculars at the 662 Gasgar Valley apartment complex which stands on the other side of the street.

LLOMON'S P.O.V. -- 662 GASGAR VALLEY APARTMENT COMPLEX'S ENTRANCE

The entrance door of the building opens and Siri steps out. Making sure she has her wallet on her, she proceeds to continue on her way down the sidewalk towards the parking garage.

INT. 663 GASGAR VALLEY APARTMENT COMPLEX/LLOMON & MAHTTOH'S APARTMENT/LIVING AREA -- DAY

Opening the balcony door, Llomon enters the living area. Mahttoh, seated on the sofa, fingers steepled across his chest and feet propped up on the caf table, turns his dark chocolate eyes away from the Wookiee opera performance currently playing on the holovid display and centres them on his partner.

LLOMON: (in Dosh, subtitled) She just left.

Nodding once silently, the Wookiee picks up a remote control and presses a button, turning the holovid player off at the exact moment before the Wookiee opera singer reaches crescendo.

INT. 662 GASGAR VALLEY APARTMENT COMPLEX/OBI-WAN & SIRI'S APARTMENT/ENTRANCE HALL -- DAY

The door into the darkened apartment slides open and Llomon and Mahttoh, two satchels at hand, sneak inside. Making haste, they reseal the door before anyone can see them and proceed to make their way deeper into the apartment.

INT. 662 GASGAR VALLEY APARTMENT COMPLEX/OBI-WAN & SIRI'S APARTMENT -- MONTAGE

We follow the bounty hunters as they make their way room-to-room, planting bugs and miniaturized cameras in various hidden spots.

INT. 662 GASGAR VALLEY APARTMENT COMPLEX/OBI-WAN & SIRI'S APARTMENT/KITCHEN -- DAY

Entering the kitchen, the bounty hunters step on over to the refrigerator. Taking hold of the unit, they pull it back away from the wall. Reaching into his satchel, Mahttoh then pulls out a detonator; arming it, he steps in the space between the refrigerator and wall and secures it in place to the unit.

LLOMON: (subtitled) That should do it.

Stepping out from behind the refrigerator, the two non-Humans then push the unit back in place.

LLOMON: (nods toward the door; subtitled) We're done here.

The bounty hunters depart the apartment, leaving no visible trace of their presence behind.

EXT. ORRON III -- DUQUESNE HOMESTEAD -- COURTYARD -- EVENING

It is a calm, clear evening on the night side of Orron III. The DuQuesne family, currently seated on lounge chairs outside, look up into the night sky of their world. The planet's three moons have coming into perfect alignment, combining their collective light to form a large, brilliant star in the heavens.

EXT. SPACE

With a blur of pseudo-motion, the Wayward Son emerges from hyperspace. The Corellian ship finds itself floating in deep interstellar space, surrounded on all sides by billions of brilliant stars with a distant varicoloured nebula situated in the black firmament to their far right. No worlds or nearby suns are to be found anywhere, however.

INT. WAYWARD SON/COCKPIT 

Taking one long glance out at the magnificent view of realspace situated beyond the cockpit, Cmdr. Vaness then reaches for the headset comlink secured over her left ear. 

CMDR. VANESS: (activates comlink) Dr. Moulin, we have emerged from hyperspace. Could you report to the cockpit to calculate our next hyperroute, please?

The commander receives no response.

CMDR. VANESS: (cont'd) Dr. Moulin, are you there?

INT. WAYWARD SON/CREW QUARTERS

Having a need to keep to their daily exercise routine even aboard the Wayward Son, Obi-Wan and Nik have decided to take up jogging through the length of the ship. Currently dressed in their lightest, coolest clothes, they make their way out into the main corridor, passing by Käthe Naad as she makes her way inside towards her quarters.

ANAKIN: (nods to Käthe) Hey, Käthe.

MSC. NAAD: (grins) Hi, Nik.

INT. WAYWARD SON/MAIN CORRIDOR

ANAKIN: (checks his chronometre) So, how long should we go for today? Sixty-nine minutes?

OBI-WAN: Let's make it an even eighty-six and then we'll hit the showers.

Just as they get ready to begin their jog, Cmdr. Cody exits the engineering bay. Looking ill at ease and edgy, the man from Concord Dawn hurriedly turns to his right and makes a sprint down the corridor without noticing the pair of Jedi. Exchanging glances, the two Jedi Knights silently agree to follow him.

INT. WAYWARD SON/COCKPIT

As Cmdr. Vaness gets ready to leave her seat, Dr. Moulin enters the cockpit and plops down in the co-pilot's seat.

DR. MOULIN: (calls a star chart up on a computer display) Sorry for the tardiness, Commander. I had to use the facilities.

EXT. ORRON III -- DUQUESNE HOMESTEAD -- COURTYARD -- EVENING

As the DuQuesnes watch the three aligned moons blaze, a formation of storm clouds -- appearing suddenly out of nowhere -- begins to coalesce in the sky above them.

INT. WAYWARD SON/MAIN CORRIDOR

Rounding a corner, Cody comes to the hatch leading into cockpit access corridor. Opening the hatch, the Journeyman Protector dashes inside.

INT. WAYWARD SON/COCKPIT

DR. MOULIN: There, I've finished charting our course. If we head for the K-type star here (points to a spot on the star chart), we'll be able to avoid crossing paths with the neutron star and continue on to the C-type star here (points to another spot on the chart). It's a long route -- it'll add another six hours to our travel time -- but it's safe.

CMDR. VANESS: (sighs) Punch it in.

As the Gungan begins entering the coordinates into the navicomputer, Cmdr. Cody bursts into the cockpit. At a near panic, he pounces upon the two women just as the hyperdrive comes on-line.

INT. WAYWARD SON/HYPERDRIVE ACCESS TUBE

Inside the access tube, where the twisted body of Sn. Antilles lies cold in unceremonious death, the detonator activates as commands from the hyperdrive motivator are filtered through it.

With a soundless flash of brilliant white light, the detonator explodes.

EXT. ORRON III -- DUQUESNE HOMESTEAD -- COURTYARD -- EVENING

The cloud formation grows like a cancer, concealing the aligned moons and blotting out their light.

EXT. TRANSSPACE

A wound in the fabric of spacetime is torn open, catapulting the Wayward Son into the extradimensional realm of transspace. Unlike hyperspace, which is a corridor of swirling blue light, transspace consists of a white void filled with iridescent energy conduits connecting different regions of realspace. Caught in one of these conduits, the YT-1300 freighter tumbles end-over-end on an uncontrolled flight through this alien cosmos toward an unknown destination.

INT. WAYWARD SON -- MONTAGE  

We take a look into the Wayward Son. Moving through the various rooms of the ship, we find everything -- crew members, ship's functions, and the expanding explosion from the ruptured hyperdrive itself -- frozen in place, affixed in time.

EXT. SPACE -- XUTHLTAN

With a burst of pearlescent light, the Wayward Son emerges in a distant region of the Galaxy. Trailing burning hyperdrive energies from its back end, it careens toward a planet enveloped in sulphur-yellow cloud formations. 

EXT. XUTHLTAN -- DESERT LANDSCAPE -- DAY

Emerging from the thick cloud cover, the Wayward Son finds itself speeding towards the surface of a perfectly flat, dried-up river bed. The craft banks left, putting it on a slightly more stable course, but that is all the ship has left to give.

Losing altitude, the Wayward Son hits the ground. Plowing through the dry earth, the freighter carves a long line into it as it skids forward.

EXT. ORRON III -- DUQUESNE HOMESTEAD -- COURTYARD -- EVENING

With a flash of lightning and a crash of thunder, the heavy storm clouds unload their burden. Large rain drops the colour of fresh blood pelt the ground in a torrential downpour. 

Disgusted by the sight and the smell of the red rain, Nemec and Corin quickly leave their lounge chairs and rush into the house. Nashira, on the other hand, cooly and calmly rises to her feet. Raising her open hands to the sky, she slowly looks up, standing in place as rivulets of crimson water run down her face and body.

Haarspalter said:

SilverWook said:

Even respected actors have to pay the bills. Sir Alec probably has a dog or two in his filmography.

 Sean Connery has The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen & Highlander 2: The Quickening.

FTFY 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L_mrNQBLSMU

Doubleoffive's ignoring me! Me! The most agreeable, inoffensive person in the world!

This action makes no sense -- no sense at all.

Harrold Andraste said:

Btw, is there a universe for each of the Thomas Kinkade painting edits?

Nah. Judging by the pictures, they all look like they'd fit in one universe comfortably enough. ;-)

...

There's something I've been wondering about and been meaning to ask for some time now: Does the term "Jedi Order" show up in the OT?

Yes, well, there isn't exactly enough out there to make an accurate assessment yet. What there is, though, either disinterests me or leaves me cold. That may change in the future, but with Lucasfilm's track record, I have very serious doubts.

bkev said:

Is this whole Sana Solo thing really so bad?  A character from Han's past coming by to stir up trouble sounds like classic comic-book writing to me.

For my part, I'm simply underwhelmed by the way the nuEU's been developed so far. The entire slate's been wiped clean, leaving a whole universe of storytelling opportunity there for writers to take advantage of, and what do they do with it? Tell a bunch of mediocre, run-of-the-mill stories about the same three characters which adds nothing of significance or importance to the SW Universe.

Lord Haseo said:

Then why in the mother of fuck are you reading these series of comics?

I'm not, really. The main series sounds like crap, so I'm avoiding it. I read the first two issues of the Vader comic and then I quit. The only comic I'm currently reading is the Princess Leia miniseries, and that's proven to be a milquetoast waste of time.

Shouldn't this predictability hinder you from Rogue One and the inevitable Old Republic movies as well? And that should certainly have deterred you from viewing the PT.

Different stakes and different characters are at play here. Rogue One's going to presumably have a roster of characters who have never appeared before, so I don't know what's going to happen to them. As for the PT, it promised to flesh out the Clone Wars, the collapse of the Old Republic, Anakin's rise and fall, and the end of the Jedi Order;  Han and Leia's love life pales considerably in comparison to that.

As for Old Republic movies, I won't be watching any if they're just going to be more of the same "Jedi vs. Sith" claptrap that's been churned out for the past several years.

Well I hope the ST is too your liking but I doubt it will live up to any inane expectations any of us have.

I hope so, too. At the very least, I expect it to be better than the PT.

Way perpetuate the stereotype that Star Wars fans complain about everything no matter how minute. Now it seems that we will complain about shit that hasn't fully panned out yet.

Perhaps if the nuEU wasn't already succumbing to poor quality control, I'd be less pissy.

If you can write a better story line for the current continuity...by all means. I'd love to see what your mind conjures up.

How about this: The Empire obviously has access to cloning technology, so why not tell a story about Imperials kidnapping people involved in the Rebellion and replacing them with clone spies? That subject's been an elephant in the room ever since AOTC came out; it's about time it was addressed.

TV's Frink said:

DuracellEnergizer said:

DominicCobb said:

Maybe something like transsexualism is technically a "disorder" but who gives a fuck. If a guy feels like he should be a girl, then why not let him be a girl? It's a victimless act.

It's not quite victimless when it has an impact on loved ones. 

 Oh please.  They aren't victims, they're intolerant.

So if a man/woman

1. Meets a girl/guy

2. Falls in love with her/him

3. Ends up marrying her/him

4. Has a number of children with her/him

5. Spends a good portion of his/her adult years with her/him

he/she's intolerant if s/he one day springs the news that's s/he's transgendered and wants to have a sex change operation, emotionally devastating him/her in the process? 

xxtelecine 7xx said:

?? Which one? And whose?

FTFY 

Lord Haseo said:

DuracellEnergizer said:

Yay, another pointless development that'll ultimately have no impact on the characters whatsoever since we all know how Han & Leia's relationship pans out.

Han having a wife will most certainty stall the development of the relationship.

So what? If this was 1978-1983, this story might work -- TESB and/or ROTJ haven't come out yet, so there's no way of knowing what will happen with the characters.

However, this isn't the late '70s/early '80s, this is 2015; I know things work out perfectly for them, so what am I supposed to fear for? One way or another, Mrs. Han Solo I will quickly exit stage right and it will be like she never was there to begin with.

You seem to forget that there is 3 years of space between ANH and ESB so this is a much needed roadblock.

1. No, I haven't forgotten. Of course, perhaps I don't really care.  Perhaps I think that after decades of stories focused on the Big Three, there's no more mileage to be found in their stories. Perhaps I think instead of focusing on Luke/Leia/Han, this series should do something different like -- oh, I don't know -- focusing on peripheral and original characters in the SW Universe.

2. "Roadblock" is just another word for "filler", right?

Also none of us know the nature of this marriage or how it was orchestrated

And I don't care. Creatively-bankrupt Marvel hasn't given me any reason to care.

DominicCobb said:

Maybe something like transsexualism is technically a "disorder" but who gives a fuck. If a guy feels like he should be a girl, then why not let him be a girl? It's a victimless act.

It's not quite victimless when it has an impact on loved ones. 

There's nothing quite like finding a dead, rotted, dried-up kitten in a dark, hidden corner when cleaning mouse shit out of the basement.

Neglify said:

Ass... and titties.

Ass... and titties.

Ass ass... titties titties...

You forgot pussy, you wussy. 

Ryan McAvoy said:

Warbler said:

I bet Christopher Lee would make a great Master.

 In the imaginary universe I created he was ;-)

Hey! That's my schtick! 

Nice. I always imagined Green Leader as blond, though, so it was kinda offputting seeing him with black hair.

ray_afraid said:

Of all the wonderful films he took part in, the thread title has to mention his worst and least interesting role.
Shame.

Well, this is the Star Wars part of the forum ... 

A man went to Khartoum

Where he watched a cartoon

About a buffoon

Who lived in a lagoon