DuracellEnergizer

Tack said:

DominicCobb said:

I feel like it’s worth mentioning Vader chokes a total of two people in all of TESB.

Really? Damn. Maybe I’ve been grasping at straws this whole time. SOMETHING feels different to me.

In any case, I found the article. It just gets my imagination going as to what a more nuanced version of Vader would be like.

https://archive.org/details/Warren_Presents_003_Star_Quest_Comix_01_mothra/page/n23

That’s an excellent article. Too bad Lucas and later writers didn’t read it/take it to heart.

Shopping Maul said:

Tack said:

I feel like ESB did more harm than good for Vader. I came across an article in an old issue of Famous Monsters of Filmland (around 1978) and it had a really interesting point about the code of honor which Vader seems to exhibit in the original Star Wars, and it read quite a bit of character into him that is easy to imagine being a reason for the spike of popularity he achieved between 1977 and 1980. I’ll try and post it if I can find it again. It made some interesting points.

Anyway, in Empire Strikes Back I feel like the nuance of Vader’s characterization was almost entirely lost. The constant killing of his subordinates (to a degree it almost becomes a running gag), the comparatively angry delivery of his lines versus the more soft-spoken delivery of the original, and the fact that his dialogue becomes considerably more blunt. He has his moments of greatness, certainly, but I feel like from the outset of development they were too far gone into making him over-the-top evil rather than the comparatively mysterious and intimidating figure he was in the original film.

I’m actually curious, does anyone else think this?

I like the transition from ANH to TESB because it sets Vader up as a creature of pure rage. He’s kind of out of his element in ANH - being on the Death Star with Tarkin and everything - but in TESB he’s running his own show. And yes, the strangulations become something of a running joke but it’s a pretty sick joke - and not something you can really come back from. This guy kills people who piss him off! Which for me really fuels the horror of the revelation at the film’s climax. Had Vader been more sympathetic, we might not have been so floored by that iconic reveal. The fact that Vader is not a good guy lends weight to Luke’s (and our own) shock IMO.

Unfortunately, it runs counter to the notion that this is a man who “still has good in him.”

ATMachine said:

All you really need to do to make SW R-Rated is follow certain Ralph McQuarrie concept drawings.

Or watch War of the Stars.

oojason said:

theprequelsrule said:

oojason said:

Eva Green

Not only did she steal scenes in Penny Dreadful - she stole the whole show.

https://www.imdb.com/name/nm1200692/

You show much better taste here.

My taste is fine, thanks. I find there is usually more to finding something beautiful than just the physical or ‘superficial’. YMMV.

This.

A number of years back, I briefly knew a woman who was on the plain side, physically, but had an incredibly zesty personality which made her quite beautiful to me.

Is Dagobah really a swamp planet? I know single-biome planets are common in this series, but is Dagobah conclusively presented as one in the films themselves? IIRC, what we see of the planet from space is shrouded in heavy cloud, hiding the topography. For all we know, Dagobah’s a terrestrial planet like Earth and Luke just landed in the equivalent of the Everglades.

Tack said:

I feel like ESB did more harm than good for Vader. I came across an article in an old issue of Famous Monsters of Filmland (around 1978) and it had a really interesting point about the code of honor which Vader seems to exhibit in the original Star Wars, and it read quite a bit of character into him that is easy to imagine being a reason for the spike of popularity he achieved between 1977 and 1980. I’ll try and post it if I can find it again. It made some interesting points.

Anyway, in Empire Strikes Back I feel like the nuance of Vader’s characterization was almost entirely lost. The constant killing of his subordinates (to a degree it almost becomes a running gag), the comparatively angry delivery of his lines versus the more soft-spoken delivery of the original, and the fact that his dialogue becomes considerably more blunt. He has his moments of greatness, certainly, but I feel like from the outset of development they were too far gone into making him over-the-top evil rather than the comparatively mysterious and intimidating figure he was in the original film.

I’m actually curious, does anyone else think this?

Vader raises his voice quite a few times in SW '77 and strangles a guy to death with his own hands. I don’t think he ever raises his voice in the sequels (all his anger’s of the cold variety), and he never physically assaults anyone (aside from cutting Luke’s hand off/tossing Palpatine into a pit). TESB did go too far with the Force-choking, though.

timdiggerm said:

• Was Yaddle absent from the council during AOTC & ROTS because she was on maternity leave?

Yoddle: A Star Wars Love Story

Make it so, Disney. And make it X-rated.

ZkinandBonez said:

Palpatine’s Art of Camp (And How It Saved The Prequels);
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=05_HDCwgD28

Pretty interesting video analyzing how Ian McDiarmid, and to a somewhat lesser degree Ewan McGregor, became the most liked parts of the PT by embracing the campiness of it, while the other actors tried too hard to play it serious.

Too bad I hate camp.

I knew my fixation on lightsaber colours would come in handy some day.

• Aayla Secura — crimson
• Adi Gallia* — red
• Plo Koon — yellow/orange
• Ki-Adi-Mundu — violet/purple (some comics depicted it matching Windu’s shade of violet, others didn’t)

And here’s a link identifying all the Jedi at the Battle of Geonosis:

https://www.starwars.com/news/meet-the-geonosis-jedi

*The EU retconned this character into Stass Allie, another Jedi of the same species as Gallia, but I’m certain Lucas intended her to be one and the same. It’s up to you how binding you find this retcon.

ANGELA STAINES

That surname, though. . . .

theprequelsrule said:

It’s a faaaake!

It’s reeeeal!

theprequelsrule said:

Vision of the Future was the perfect sendoff to Star Wars for me…leave the future adventures of Luke, Han, Mara, Lando, Leia, Wedge and all the rest up to our imaginations. The duology is my canon SSD (Sequel-Sequel-Duology). Of course, it was last book written before the PT ideas infected/defecated on SW.

This, pretty much. If Star Wars had effectively ended here — no prequels, no sequels, and little to no more EU — it would’ve been an excellent sendoff for the franchise.

Maybe I should just place myself in that mindset.

Darkly beautiful surreality in luscious B&W. There are times when I make impulse sight-unseen purchases which I end up regretting; this certainly isn’t one of those times. Incredible. Just incredible.

Tobar said:

I would want a Resistance trilogy that is a character study about John Connor. With no time travel elements until the end of the last film that sets up T1&2. The first film would be the fall of civilization and the start of the war. See how John prepared for that and began rallying survivors. The first film would predominately have HKs and endoskeleton terminators. The second film would introduce the infiltration terminators starting with the rubber skinned earliest models. This would be expensive but I think it would be great to have a de-aged Arnold as a member of the Resistance that disappears for a while and returns as a T-800. The last film would be the last great seige of Skynet as John learns they’ve cracked time travel and are preparing to assassinate him in the past.

There’s a lot you can do with the future war setting that they squandered with Salvation.

Great ideas all around. I think a Brad Fiedel-inspired synth score and cold industrial colour grading are also essential. The generic score and warm colours of Salvation certainly did that film no favours.

TavorX said:

Wouldn’t it be kind of odd to have Luke not involved with rescuing Han? I like most of your ideas, but that one in particular stood out as a sore thumb. I mean, in a way, I could imagine Leia telling Luke he has a bigger responsibility to finish his training. And I do like the idea of Leia being more involved in the operation.

It’s certainly not perfect, no. Between shortening the sequence and giving Leia a more active role, I couldn’t see where to fit Luke in.

RogueLeader said:

In all seriousness, what would you change about ROTJ if you could? I like hearing your perspective!

• Remove the Death Star II, or make the Death Star II a ruse to lure the Rebels into a trap.
• Retool the entire Jabba sequence. Jabba’s palace would’ve be on a planet other than Tatooine; Leia would gift the droids to Jabba; Lando would free Han from the carbonite and get captured in the process; then Leia would arrive in person and successfully barter for Han & co’s freedom. Everything else would be cut.
• Luke would be on Dagobah, where he’d have been since the events of TESB, finishing his training under Yoda. He wouldn’t have a new lightsaber at this point.
• Leia would be “the other”, as powerful in the Force as Luke, but not his sister.
• Han would have some actual dignity. Instead of delivering dumb slapstick and one-liners, his relationship with Leia would continue to evolve.
• The Ewoks would be scary. They’d be pygmy versions of the original Chewbacca design, with oversized eyes and sharp fangs. They’d wear clothing made from human skin, and gruesome sculptures made of Imperial armour and human bones would decorate their village.
• Palpatine would not be a cackling Saturday morning cartoon supervillain. He’d be as he was portrayed by Clive Revill — resonant but understated.
• There’d be deeper exploration into Vader’s motivations and psyche. It would be made clear that Vader was a good man who joined Palpatine under false pretenses and became his puppet, and now wishes his son to join him in the dark side so together they can depose Palpatine and transform the Empire into the strong but benevolent power he always wanted it to be.
• It would be revealed that Vader kept Ben’s lightsaber as a trophy, and he would show it to Luke on Endor.
• Palpatine’s finest troops would actually live up to that descriptor. For once, we’d have stormtroopers with effective armour who can actually hit what they fire at.
• Palpatine would make a strong case for why Luke should turn to the dark side — power not for power’s sake, which Luke doesn’t crave, but to right wrongs, avenge evil, and protect his loved ones.
• During their duel, Luke and Vader would end up swapping lightsabers; Luke, with Vader’s red lightsaber, would face Vader, with Ben’s blue lightsaber.
• Han would die in the battle on Endor.
• Vader would succumb quicker to his injuries after killing Palpatine. He would die without his true face ever being revealed.
• Luke would dismantle Ben and Vader’s lightsabers and craft his own from their components. This lightsaber would be purple.
• No Force ghosts at the end. Whether or not Anakin atoned for his sins by saving Luke would be left up to the viewer to decide for themself.

OutboundFlight said:

DuracellEnergizer said:

regularjoe said:

If you want more and new Star Wars you’re going to have to make your peace with new characters, new story lines, new actors, new stories.

No “if” about it; I don’t. In fact, I wish it were possible to retroactively make less Star Wars crap.

How is it that by making the ST, or the PT, or heck even Empire Strikes Back has Lucasfilm “ruined” Star Wars 1977?

The way I see it, every piece of Star Wars media is an opportunity. Either you like it or you don’t. If you don’t, you can forget about it’s existence, and go back to what you like.

I’ve made that attempt. It’d be easy if I only had to ignore the PT & ST, but I also thoroughly dislike ROTJ. It’s kinda difficult to get a satisfying experience watching SW '77 & TESB alone without a satisfying final chapter to conclude the story.

As it stands, I view the entire SW franchise as a jigsaw puzzle with several pieces either missing or hopelessly damaged. It’s worthless as-is, but it’s components can be repurposed to create something worthwhile. My avant-garde sculpture remains a work in progress.

screams in the void said:

This is the movie people should be bitching about

Many fans are.

regularjoe said:

If you want more and new Star Wars you’re going to have to make your peace with new characters, new story lines, new actors, new stories.

No “if” about it; I don’t. In fact, I wish it were possible to retroactively make less Star Wars crap.

Thrawn One

fmalover said:

According to the Disney canon, Kyber crystals are inherently resistant to the dark side of the Force, and dark siders must bend them to their will for them to work in their lightsabers, creating a bleeding effect which is why all dark siders have red lightsabers.

If that’s the case then Anakin’s lightsaber should have stopped working because it would have sensed his turn to the dark side in ROTS, or at least should have turned red due to Anakin’s dark side influence, but no, it keeps functioning as normal when used for very obvious dark side actions like slaughtering children.

canofhumdingers said:

That’s an excellent point. Trying to force an explanation when none is really needed has just created more inconsistency. I’m not opposed to the idea of the kyber crystals having some connection to the force, but they way they are going about it just isn’t very good or well thought out.

Like, I’d be ok with them having a kind of presence in the force, like a vibration or something (crystal vibrations are something that plays right into the mysticism angle). I mean, that idea works well with the scene where Chirrut senses Jyn’s necklace in Rogue One.

But having them be semi-sentient and Sith having to bend them to their will to get them to work? And then “bleeding” in response? It’s just dumb.

It’s true. All of it.

I don’t know why the writers just couldn’t chalk the different colours up to tradition. I’m sure in the real world, cardinals in the Catholic Church could wear silver robes with green sparkles if they so wanted, but they don’t, and it’s not due to any convoluted practical reason.

INT. LARS HOMESTEAD/GARAGE — SUNSET

Luke enters the garage to discover the cyborgs nowhere in sight. He takes a small control rod from his utility belt and activates it; Threepio pops up from behind the skyhopper with a short yelp.

LUKE: What are you hiding back there for?

Threepio stumbles forward, but Artoo is still nowhere in sight.

C-3PO: It wasn’t my fault, sir. Please don’t deactivate me! I told him not to go, but he’s faulty, malfunctioning; kept babbling on about his mission.

LUKE: Oh, no!

Luke races out of the garage.

EXT. LARS HOMESTEAD — TWILIGHT

Luke rushes out of the domed entrance. Threepio joins Luke as he scans the landscape with his electrobinoculars, searching the darkening horizon for the small astromech.

C-3PO: That R2 unit has always been a problem. These astromechs are becoming too iconoclastic even for me to understand, sometimes.

LUKE: How could I be so stupid? He’s nowhere in sight. Blast it!

C-3PO: Pardon me, sir, but couldn’t we go after him?

LUKE: It’s too dangerous with all the raiders around. We’ll have to wait until morning.

OWEN: (O.S.) Luke, I’m shutting the power down!

LUKE: Alright, I’ll be there in a few minutes! (beat) Boy, am I gonna get it.

He takes one final look across the dim horizon.

LUKE: You know, that little 'borg is going to cause me a lot of trouble.

C-3PO: Oh, he excels at that, sir.

INT. LARS HOMESTEAD/COURTYARD — DAY

Morning slowly creeps into the sparse but sparkling oasis of the open courtyard. The idyll is broken by Owen, his voice echoing throughout the homestead.

OWEN: Luke? Luke‽ Luke!

INT. LARS HOMESTEAD/KITCHEN — DAY

Beru is at work preparing the morning breakfast. Owen enters.

OWEN: Have you seen Luke this morning?

BERU: He said he had some things to do before he started today, so he left early.

OWEN: (frowns) Before breakfast? That’s not like him. Did he take those two new 'borgs with him?

BERU: I think so. I’m sure I saw at least one of them with him.

OWEN: Well, he’d better have those units in the south range repaired by midday or there’ll be hell to pay.

EXT. JUNDLAND — DAY

The rock and sand of the desert floor are a blur as Threepio pilots Luke’s sleek landspeeder across the vast wasteland.

INT./EXT. LUKE’S SPEEDER - TRAVELLING - DAY

LUKE: Old Ben Kenobi lives out in this direction somewhere, but I don’t see how that R2 unit could have come this far. We must’ve missed him. Uncle Owen isn’t going to take this very well.

C-3PO: Sir, would it help if you told him it was my fault?

LUKE: (brightens) Sure. He needs you twice as much now. He’d probably only deactivate you for a day or so, or give you a partial memory flush….

C-3PO: On second thought, sir, Artoo would still be around if you hadn’t removed his restraining bolt.

LUKE: Wait, there’s a 'borg on the scanner, dead ahead. I see our little R2 unit. Hit the accelerator.

EXT. MESA — DUNE SEA — COASTLINE — DAY

From high atop a mesa, the tiny landspeeder can be seen gliding across the desert floor. In the foreground two weather-beaten TUSKEN RAIDERS swathed in mummy-like wrappings and shrouded in dusty desert cloaks peer over the edge of the rock. One of the marginally human creatures raises a slugthrower rifle and takes aim at the speeder, but his companion grabs the barrel before he can fire. They get into an animated argument in their coarse barbaric language. The second Tusken seems to get in the final word; the pair leaves the spot, scurrying over the rocky terrain.

EXT. MESA — CANYON — DAY

The Tusken raiders approach two large banthas standing lashed to a rock. The monstrous quaprupeds are as large as elephants, with huge red eyes, tremendous looped horns, and long, furry, dinosaur-like tails. The Tuskens mount the huge creatures’ saddled, shaggy backs and ride off down the rugged bluff.

EXT. CANYON — DAY

The speeder is parked on the floor of a massive canyon. Luke, with a rifle slung over his shoulder, stands before little Artoo.

LUKE: Hey, whoa, just where do you think you’re going‽

The little cyborg whistles a feeble reply. Threepio poses menacingly behind the little runaway.

C-3PO: (irate) Master Luke here is your rightful owner. We’ll have no more of this Obi-Wan Kenobi jibberish. And don’t talk to me of your mission, either. You’re fortunate he doesn’t blast you into a million pieces right here.

LUKE: Well, come on. It’s getting late. I only hope we can get back before Uncle Owen really blows up.

C-3PO: If you don’t mind my saying so, sir, I think you should deactivate the little fugitive until you’ve gotten him back to your workshop.

LUKE: No, he’s not going to try anything.

The little cyborg suddenly jumps to life with a mass of frantic whistles.

LUKE: What’s wrong with him now?

C-3PO: (worried) There are several creatures approaching from the southeast.

Luke swings his rifle into position and looks to the south.

LUKE: Tuskens! Or worse! C’mon, let’s have a look. C’mon.

EXT. CANYON — RIDGE — DAY

Luke carefully makes his way to the top of a rock ridge and scans the canyon with his macrobinoculars. Threepio struggles up behind the young adventurer.

LUKE’S P.O.V. — BANTHAS

LUKE: Well, there are two banthas down there, but I don’t see any … wait a second, they’re Tuskens all right. I can see one of them now.

Luke watches the distant Tusken raider. Suddenly something huge moves in front of his field of view.

EXT. CANYON — RIDGE — DAY

Before Luke or Threepio can react, a large, gruesome Tusken raider looms over them. Threepio, startled, backs away, right off the side of the ridge. The towering creature brings down his curved, double-pointed gaderffii — the dreaded axe of Tusken warriors. Luke blocks the blow with his rifle, which is shattered in the process. The terrified farm boy scrambles backward until he is forced to the edge of a deep crevice. The sinister raider stands over him with his weapon raised and lets out a horrible shrieking laugh.

EXT. CANYON — DAY

Artoo forces himself into the shadows of a small alcove in the rocks as the vicious Tuskens walk past carrying the inert Luke Skywalker, who is dropped in a heap before the speeder. The raiders rummmage through the speeder, throwing parts and supplies in all directions. Suddenly they stop. Everything is quiet for a few moments before a great howling moan reverberates through the canyon. The Tuskens flee in terror.

Artoo moves even tighter into the shadows as an aged man in shabby desert prospector’s clothing appears and leans over Luke. His ancient leathery face, cracked and weathered by the hot, aird climate, is set off by penetrating blue eyes and a scraggly white beard. BEN KENOBI squints, scrutinizing the unconscious farm boy, then rests his hand on Luke’s forehead. Artoo makes a slight sound. Ben straightens and turns, looking right at him.

BEN: Hello there! Come here, my little friend. No need to be afraid.

Artoo waddles over to where Luke lies, whistling and beeping his concern.

BEN: Don’t worry, he’ll be alright.

Luke begins to come around.

LUKE: What happened?

BEN: Rest easy, son, you’ve had a busy day. You’re fortunate to be in one piece.

LUKE: Ben? Ben Kenobi! Boy, am I glad to see you!

BEN: The Jundland wastes are not to be travelled lightly. It’s the misguided traveller who tempts the Tuskens’ hospitality. (beat) Tell me, young Luke, what brings you out this far?

LUKE: Oh, this little 'borg. I think he’s searching for his former master. I’ve never seen such devotion in a 'borg before. (beat) He claims to be the property of an Obi-Wan Kenobi. Is he a relative of yours? Do you know who he’s talking about?

Ben ponders this for a moment, scratching his scruffy beard.

BEN: Obi-Wan Kenobi … Obi-Wan? Now that’s a name I haven’t heard in a long time … a long time.

LUKE: I think my uncle knew him. He said he was dead.

BEN: Oh, he’s not dead. Not yet.

LUKE: You know him?

BEN: (smiles) Well of course I know him. He’s me! (beat) I haven’t gone by the name Obi-Wan since, oh, before you were born.

LUKE: Then the 'borg does belong to you.

BEN: I don’t seem to remember ever owning a 'borg. Very interesting….

He suddenly looks up at the overhanging cliffs.

BEN: I think we better get indoors. The Tuskens are easily startled, but they’ll soon be back and in greater numbers.

Artoo lets out a pathetic beep, causing Luke to remember something. He looks around.

LUKE: Threepio!

EXT. SAND PIT — DAY

Little Artoo stands at the edge of a large sand pit, chattering away in electronic whistles and beeps. Luke and Ben stand over a very dented and tangled Threepio lying in the sand. One of his arms has broken off.

Luke tries reviving the inert cyborg by shaking him, then flips a switch on his back several times. Finally the mechanical man’s systems reboot.

C-3PO: Where am I? I must have taken a bad step….

LUKE: Can you stand? We’ve got to get out of here before the Tuskens return.

C-3PO: I don’t think I can make it. You go on, Master Luke. There’s no sense in you risking yourself on my account. I’m done for.

LUKE: No, you’re not. What kind of talk is that?

C-3PO: Logical.

LUKE: Defeatist.

Luke and Ben help the battered robot to his feet.

INT. BEN’S CAVE/MAIN LIVING AREA — DAY

The small, spartan room is cluttered with desert junk, but still manages to radiate an air of time-worn comfort and security. Luke is in one corner repairing Threepio’s arm, as old Ben fiddles with Artoo.

BEN: Now, let’s see if we can’t figure out what you are, my little friend. And where you come from.

LUKE: I saw part of the message, and I —

Luke is cut short as the recorded image of the beautiful young Rebel princess is projected from Artoo’s face.

BEN: I seem to have found it.

Luke stops his work as the lovely girl’s image flickers before his eyes.

LEIA: General Obi-Wan Kenobi, I present myself in the name of the world family of Alderaan and of the Alliance to Restore the Republic. I break your solitude at the bidding of my father, Bail Organa, Viceroy and First Chairman of the Alderaan system. (beat) Years ago, General, you served the Old Republic in the Clone Wars. Now my father begs you to aid us again in our struggle against the Empire. I regret that I am unable to present my father’s request to you in person, but my ship has fallen under attack and I’m afraid my mission to bring you to Alderaan has failed. I have placed information vital to the survival of the Rebellion into the memory systems of this R2 unit. My father will know how to retrieve it. You must see this 'borg safely delivered to him on Alderaan. This is our most desperate hour. Help me, Obi-Wan Kenobi, you’re my only hope.

There is a little static and the transmission is cut short. Old Ben leans back, silently puffing on a tarnished water pipe. Luke has stars in his eyes.

LUKE: You fought in the Clone Wars?

BEN: Yes.

LUKE: But … that was so long ago.

BEN: I guess it was a while back. I was once a Jedi Knight, the same as your father.

LUKE: Jedi Knight‽ My father didn’t fight in the wars. He was a navigator on a spice freighter.

BEN: That’s what your uncle told you. Owen Lars didn’t hold with your father’s ideals. Thought he should have stayed here and not gotten involved. (beat) Owen was always afraid that your father’s adventurous life might influence you, might pull you away from Anchorhead. (shakes head) I’m afraid there wasn’t much of the farmer in Anakin Skywalker.

LUKE: Skywalker?

BEN: The Lars’ gave you their name when they adopted you, but you were your father’s son.

LUKE: (solemn) I wish I’d known him.

BEN: He was the best pilot I ever knew, and a cunning warrior. I understand you’ve become quite a good pilot yourself. (wistful) And he was a good friend. (beat) Which reminds me….

Ben gets up and goes to a chest, which he begins rummaging through. As Luke finishes repairing Threepio and starts to fit the restraining bolt back on, Threepio looks at him nervously. Luke thinks about the bolt for a moment, then puts it on the table. Ben shuffles up and presents Luke with a peculiar item.

BEN: I have something here for you. Anakin wanted you to have this when you were old enough. I tried to give it to you once before, but your uncle wouldn’t allow it. He feared you might follow old Obi-Wan on some damned-fool idealistic crusade like your father did.

C-3PO: Sir, if you’ll not be needing me, I’ll close down for awhile.

LUKE: Sure, go ahead.

In Ben’s hand is a chrome bar, 606 mm in length, with black inlay and a square guard at one end. It greatly resembles a katana hilt.

LUKE: What is it?

BEN: Your father’s lightsaber. This is the formal weapon of a Jedi Knight. Not as clumsy or as random as a blaster.

With a sharp snap-hiss, a particle beam shoots out, forming a pulsating red-white energy blade a metre long and 0.1 mm thick. Red light plays across the surroundings as Ben manipulates the saber.

BEN: (cont’d) More skill than simple sight was required for its use. An elegant weapon for a more civilized age. (beat) For over a thousand generations the Jedi Knights were the guardians of peace and justice in the Old Republic. Before the dark times, before the Empire.

Disengaging the blade, Ben hands the lightsaber to Luke. Luke examines the hilt; there are no buttons or switches or dials visible — no controls whatsoever.

LUKE: How did my father die?

BEN: A young Jedi named Darth Vader, who was a pupil of mine until he turned to evil, helped the Empire hunt down and destroy the Jedi Knights. He betrayed and murdered your father. Now the Jedi are all but extinct. (solemn) Vader was seduced by the dark side of the Force.

LUKE: The Force?

BEN: The Force is what gives the Jedi their power. It’s an energy field created by all living things. It surrounds us and penetrates us. It binds the universe together. (beat) You must learn the ways of the Force if you’re to come with me to Alderaan.

LUKE: (laughs) Alderaan? I’m not going to Alderaan. I’ve got to get home. It’s late. I’m in for it as it is.

BEN: I need your help, Luke. She needs your help. I’m getting too old for this sort of thing.

LUKE: I can’t get involved! I’ve got work to do! It’s not that I like the Empire. I hate it! But there’s nothing I can do about it right now. It’s such a long way from here.

BEN: That’s your uncle talking.

LUKE: (sighs) Oh, God, my uncle. How am I ever going to explain this?

BEN: Remember, Luke, the suffering of one man is the suffering of all. Distances are irrelevant to injustice. If not stopped soon enough, evil eventually reaches out to engulf all men, whether they have opposed it or ignored it.

LUKE: Look, I can take you as far as Anchorhead. You can get a transport there to Mos Eisley or wherever you’re going.

BEN: Very well. That will do for a beginning. Then you must do what you feel is right.

I am Connor Maclunkey of the Clan Maclunkey and I cannot shoot first.

Anakin Starkiller said:

Your_friendly_Imperial said:

Darth Vader’s lightsaber is blue like in the novels by Alan Dean Foster.
He also wears his suit to jump in space from ship to ship.

Honestly, Vader jumping from ship to ship in space honestly sounds really badass.

Not if you cut-&-paste Vader’s head onto Leia Poppins’ body.

Now there’s an idea.