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DuracellEnergizer

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30-May-2010
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30-Dec-2020
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Post
#1307812
Topic
What stories/intellectual properties (other than Star Wars) would you like to retell/rewrite?
Time

Stargate

Stargate '94 has amazing costumes, sets, music, and lore, but weak writing and characterization. Stargate SG-1 has good characterization and writing, but it feels like a Trek knockoff, complete with generic English-speaking extraterrestrial civilizations and technobabble. I’d essentially like to craft a Stargate reboot which contains all the best elements of SG '94, SG-1, SGU, and the Bill McCay novels, and none of their worst.

I’d probably limit the humans seeded across the galaxy to north African stock rather than go gung-ho with Greeks, Chinese, Native Americans. etc. Also, no frickin’ Ancients/Ori/Ascension. That stuff wrecked Stargate for me.

Post
#1307793
Topic
The Ultimate Star Wars Saga
Time

theprequelsrule said:

Some thoughts, alternative ideas, and responses:

-let’s have blue be the color for all Jedi lightsabers, and red for all Sith, Luke gets green which symbolizes his New Jedi Order

Truth be told, I keep vacillating between this and the inverse. On one hand, blue works for PT-era Jedi and red for Sith due to the too cold/too hot dichotomy they represent. On the other, I like the idea of the “good guys” using red lightsabers, plus it hearkens back to the early drafts of the first film.

One way or the other, Luke and the New Jedi Order at large would have a rainbow of lightsaber colours to represent their individuality and the break from the fundamentalism of the past.

-Palpatine is not Sith; he is something even more powerful in the Darkside

I definitely like this. It’s the direction I took with my previous PT rewrite.

-Ventress dual-wielding ounds good; no lightpikes, double bladed blades or other silliness

I think lightsaber pikes are a neat variant, but I agree that double bladed lightsabers, lightwhips, etc. are a bridge too far.

-Clone Masters need to be the main enemy at some point (Episode 2 I guess); they come from outside the Galaxy and attack without warning; they are allied with the Mandalorians

I went a similar route in my last rewrite. Didn’t go the extragalactic route, though (seemed unnecessary, and gave me Yuuzhan Vong flashbacks), or associate them with the Mandos.

I was considering sticking closer to the Lucas/TCW version of the Clone Wars this time around, but I still like the idea of paying homage to the early EU lore.

-there are multiple Clone Wars seperated by years of peace

Did that last time, too. In my headcanon, there were three Clone Wars with three different adversarial forces which altogether spanned half a century. Part of me thought it made the universe more complex and “real”, but the other thought it complicated the story too much.

-lets put the Jedi in white half-armour like Kenobi wears in the Clone Wars

I’m more partial to the Vaderesque armour Anakin wore, especially if the clones are the bad guys of the story.

I have to say, your points have made me reconsider refurbishing my prior PT rewrite. I ended up going too far into postmodern grimdarkness, but there was a good story beneath the mire; it wouldn’t take much to polish it into a trilogy more in keeping with the spirit of the OT.

Post
#1307606
Topic
Worst Ideas in Star Wars/Good Ideas that went Horribly Wrong
Time

thelonius said:

snooker said:

Goshhh Dooku is seriously the biggest missed opportunity of the prequels. He has like, a minute or two of screen time where he isn’t fighting and it’s so infuriating.

For about 20 minutes while watching Episode II for the first time I thought it was brilliant that he captures Obi-Wan and basically tells him the truth. It looked like they were setting up Dooku as one of the founders of the Rebellion. Having a “bad guy” be basically be on the same side as the Rebels would have been an interesting twist. But they flushed that down the toilet by the end of the film.

Lucas doesn’t know how to write morally complex characters. The best he was able to do was depict Windu as a major dick who really, really doesn’t like Sith Lords.

Post
#1307523
Topic
Unusual <strong>Sequel Trilogy</strong> Radical Redux Ideas Thread
Time

EddieDean said:

DuracellEnergizer said:

EddieDean said:

Gigawattboy said:

If Hux had purple hair, I would have color corrected his hair too. And for the same reasons as changing Holdo’s to a more natural color. Neither are aliens so purple wouldn’t be a natural color. Something about spending their time on hair in the middle of Armageddon seems weird. It would be like Kyle Reese taking the time to dye his hair in the middle of The Terminator while he’s running for his life and living in sewers, eating rats. Something about it just doesn’t seem right. Granted, I had to watch The Last Jedi about 40 times before it started to bother me

Is pink hair not natural amongst humans in the Star Wars universe? Like I say I’ve not read much of the EU so sorry if I haven’t read the part where it says that Star Wars’ humans are limited to our blonde, brown, or Earth-natural reds.

There are plenty of humans and near-humans with exotic hair colours in the EU.

That’s interesting. I wonder why there’s so much focus on this one character then.

Unfamiliarity with the EU, I’d wager. The films themselves never really allude to genetically modified humans or human subspecies.

Post
#1307490
Topic
The Ultimate Star Wars Saga
Time

Some more ideas:

  • Most Jedi/Sith wouldn’t have Force powers such as telekinesis, Force lightning, etc. Only Force-wielders of extraordinary strength would have such powers.
  • The lightsaber would be a mostly ceremonial weapon; the Jedi/Sith would fight primarily with blasters and martial arts, utilizing lightsabers only as a cutting tool and in duels.
Post
#1307489
Topic
<strong>The Mandalorian</strong> - a general discussion thread - * <em><strong>SPOILERS</strong></em> *
Time

RogueLeader said:

DuracellEnergizer said:

Broom Kid said:

it seems almost like Mandalorians are the Star Wars version of Klingons now.

That’s an insult to the Mandalorians.

I’ve heard a lot of people describe the legends Mandos this way, I guess since they make the easiest comparisons as “the warrior race”.

Maybe it fits Karen Traviss’ Mandos. I wouldn’t know, since I never read that stuff. But the Mandalorians in TCW were far better than the Space Vikings of TNG+.

Post
#1307463
Topic
4K restoration on Star Wars
Time

ray_afraid said:

sade1212 said:

why is he wall-eyed? It’s the same in the Bluray but surely his eyes aren’t actually doing that in the original footage they used; it must be edited. I think his left eye (closest to Obi Wan) is legit and the right eye must be ‘adjusted’ so he looks more forwards. Cover up the (his) right side of his face and it looks like he’s looking at someone stood in front of Ben.

Yeah, I think you’re right about the eye. Weird.

Lucas always wanted Jack Elam as the redeemed Anakin, but he wasn’t available at the time. Now with digital technology, he can realize his Original Vision™ as it was always meant to be.

Post
#1307375
Topic
The Ultimate Star Wars Saga
Time

EPISODE I: RECONSTRUCTED EDITION

Naboo is now Alderaan. At this point in time, Alderaan is the ruling planet of an independent system which has petitioned for Republic membership but is not yet part of that body.

Keeping this.

The Trade Federation is now the Federation Neimoidia. Instead of being a shipping/trading conglomerate (or whatever), the Federation’s a compact empire of mercenaries which hires its services out to planets/systems embroiled in small-scale conflicts.

Ditching this. I’d use the Mandalorian Death Watch instead.

Qui-Gon remains Obi-Wan’s master.

Ditching this. Yoda would be Obi-Wan’s master, with Qui-Gon Obi-Wan’s junior protege.

Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan wear black uniforms, the standard garb of Jedi.

Ditching this. Jedi would wear white uniforms.

[Obi-Wan] is the Jedi watchman of the Alderaan system. As such, he and [Qui-Gon] are already present on the planet’s surface when the Federation invades.

Keeping this.

Amidala and Padmé are now separate characters. Amidala is a child queen, 9 years old, innocent and demure. Padmé is one of her bodyguards, 17 years old, stern, with a lean muscular build.

Ditching this. I’d remove the Amidala/Padmé character altogether. A teenage Bail Organa would be the royal personage targeted by the Mandalorians, and his bodyguard would be the Mistryl Shadow Guard Nashira D’uquesne, a reimagined version of Anakin’s romantic partner from my previous PT rewrite.

Threepio is one of [Bail]'s servitors.

Keeping this.

Palpatine never appears in his Darth Sidious persona. It is Darth Maul alone who conspires with the [Mandalorians]. He is a human with red-&-black body tattoos, pristine white teeth, and a crown of feathers sewn with razor wire about his head. He wears white robes, the standard garb of Sith.

Ditching/amending this. I’m just completely sick to death of Maul; I’d use Asajj Ventress in his place, and she’d wear black.

The B1 battle droids are replaced with BX commando droids. These droids rarely speak.

Ditching this since Mandalorians are the enemy now.

[Obi-Wan], a nonconformist who straddles the line between orthodoxy/unorthdoxy, is the only Jedi who wields a green lightsaber. [Qui-Gon], more by-the-book than his master, wields a standard blue Jedi lightsaber.

Ditching this. Obi-Wan & Qui-Gon would both wield red lightsabers.

Gungans are present in the story, but Jar Jar is jettisoned.

Keeping this.

Anakin is 12 years old.

Ditching this. He’d be 14 years old to Nashira’s 19.

Cliegg Lars assumes Watto’s role. Owen is Anakin’s only friend. It is implied Cliegg is Anakin’s father (and Owen his half-brother).

Amending this. Cliegg would own the junk shop, but he’d be Anakin’s stepfather rather than biological father, and his relationship with Shmi would be a normal husband-wife relationship rather than one of master-slave.

No podrace. Qui-Gon successfully barters for Anakin’s freedom but hasn’t enough to buy Shmi’s.

Amending this. Still no podrace, but since Anakin’s not a slave, no bartering’s necessary.

Rather than a double-bladed lightsaber, [Ventress] wields a lightsaber pike. The shaft is of lightsaber-resistant metal, sporting a single red blade.

Ditching this. She’d wield two curved-hilt lightsabers with blue blades.

The [Mandalorians] erect planetary shield generators across the face of Alderaan. These generators, kilometres across in size, ravage the natural landscape and claim thousands-to-millions of lives.

There is no Chosen One prophecy. Anakin’s raw prowess with the Force is impetus enough for [Obi-Wan] to bring him before the Jedi Council.

The dissonance between [Obi-Wan] and the Council is greater here, with visible animosity between [Obi-Wan] and Mace Windu.

The Republic has a navy, modest but sizable enough to displace the [Mandalorian] presence on Alderaan. Being a non-member system, however, bureaucratic red tape prevents the Senate from assisting Alderaan. This is what inspires the non-confidence vote which ousts Valorum from the chancellorship.

Anakin remains behind at the Jedi Temple as [Obi-Wan] and the others return to Alderaan.

Allying with the Gungans, the Jedi & co. go to capture and disable the main shield generator. This is where [Obi-Wan] and [Qui-Gon] face [Ventress]. [Ventress] fatally wounds Qui-Gon and bests Obi-Wan. Rather than slay Obi-Wan, [Ventress] considers the [knight] too unworthy to die by [her] hand and so makes [her] departure.

The planetary shield nullified, the Republic fleet arrives to beat off the [Death Watch].

The ending mostly plays out the same as in Lucas’ film.

Keeping these.

Further changes I’d make:

  • Pre Vizsla would be the leader of the Mandalorians. He’d have no darksaber, though.
  • The Jedi council would remain adamant in their refusal to induct Anakin into the Jedi Order. Obi-Wan would defy them and begin training Anakin in secret.
Post
#1307309
Topic
Unusual <strong>Sequel Trilogy</strong> Radical Redux Ideas Thread
Time

EddieDean said:

Gigawattboy said:

If Hux had purple hair, I would have color corrected his hair too. And for the same reasons as changing Holdo’s to a more natural color. Neither are aliens so purple wouldn’t be a natural color. Something about spending their time on hair in the middle of Armageddon seems weird. It would be like Kyle Reese taking the time to dye his hair in the middle of The Terminator while he’s running for his life and living in sewers, eating rats. Something about it just doesn’t seem right. Granted, I had to watch The Last Jedi about 40 times before it started to bother me

Is pink hair not natural amongst humans in the Star Wars universe? Like I say I’ve not read much of the EU so sorry if I haven’t read the part where it says that Star Wars’ humans are limited to our blonde, brown, or Earth-natural reds.

There are plenty of humans and near-humans with exotic hair colours in the EU.

Post
#1307306
Topic
Worst Ideas in Star Wars/Good Ideas that went Horribly Wrong
Time

regularjoe said:

One of the prequels problems was that Lucas kept introducing a new “main” villain every movie. What would have been wrong with Darth Maul as the main antagonist for the entire PT?

What’s wrong with Darth Maul is Dooku. They should have gone with Dooku from E1 straight through 3.
I realize that the Empire doesn’t exist yet but Maul as the apprentice runs counter to the xenophobia of the realized Empire and Palpy was the one behind all that so Maul doesn’t make sense at all.

Christopher Lee was a sadly wasted opportunity of quality; instead we were given Grievous in 3 and Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom level garbage.

Ignoring Palpatine’s xenophobia, Maul’s just a metalhead’s wet dream with a gimmicky lightsaber played by an ascended stuntman; he’s all style, no substance. Dooku, on the other hand, was played by one of the greatest actors who ever lived, and all the ingredients for an amazing complex antivillian prefiguring Vader were there.

Post
#1307176
Topic
Episode IX: The Rise Of Skywalker - Discussion * <strong><em>SPOILER THREAD</em></strong> *
Time

Mocata said:

MalàStrana said:

Daisy Ridley is probably the worst actress of her generation.

I was going to make a joke about getting someone with real acting chops like Emilia Clarke but then I remembered she is in a SW movie. There are many worse female leads out there so I don’t see what you mean, beyond the standard hyperbole.

Nah, Mala’s right. We needed an actress of Megan Fox’s calibre to play Rey.

Post
#1307140
Topic
Worst Ideas in Star Wars/Good Ideas that went Horribly Wrong
Time

Shopping Maul said:

DuracellEnergizer said:

Shopping Maul said:

Tack said:

I feel like ESB did more harm than good for Vader. I came across an article in an old issue of Famous Monsters of Filmland (around 1978) and it had a really interesting point about the code of honor which Vader seems to exhibit in the original Star Wars, and it read quite a bit of character into him that is easy to imagine being a reason for the spike of popularity he achieved between 1977 and 1980. I’ll try and post it if I can find it again. It made some interesting points.

Anyway, in Empire Strikes Back I feel like the nuance of Vader’s characterization was almost entirely lost. The constant killing of his subordinates (to a degree it almost becomes a running gag), the comparatively angry delivery of his lines versus the more soft-spoken delivery of the original, and the fact that his dialogue becomes considerably more blunt. He has his moments of greatness, certainly, but I feel like from the outset of development they were too far gone into making him over-the-top evil rather than the comparatively mysterious and intimidating figure he was in the original film.

I’m actually curious, does anyone else think this?

I like the transition from ANH to TESB because it sets Vader up as a creature of pure rage. He’s kind of out of his element in ANH - being on the Death Star with Tarkin and everything - but in TESB he’s running his own show. And yes, the strangulations become something of a running joke but it’s a pretty sick joke - and not something you can really come back from. This guy kills people who piss him off! Which for me really fuels the horror of the revelation at the film’s climax. Had Vader been more sympathetic, we might not have been so floored by that iconic reveal. The fact that Vader is not a good guy lends weight to Luke’s (and our own) shock IMO.

Unfortunately, it runs counter to the notion that this is a man who “still has good in him.”

Not at the time. The ‘still has good in him’ thing was a ROTJ addition.

True.