Chewtobacca

As it happens, I have done. See my recent PM. 😄

But I’m convinced that something is wrong on my end…

Mike O said:
I want to enjoy life again, enjoy movies again, be able to watch stuff, read stuff, not have anxiety attacks when I pass churches.

Being able to experience enjoyment again is something that tends to come back slowly, but it does come back. Based on what you’ve described, it sounds as if it will be a while before you can enjoy the things that you mentioned again, and it won’t come back in one go, but you’ll get there. Probably, you’ll catch yourself enjoying something one day and won’t realize until that instant that that’s what you have been doing.

Thanks for checking, but I’ve tried uninstalling all previous versions and MATLAB and then reinstalling, but that pop-up box still won’t go away. I’ll keep trying.

EDIT: Once again, the tool seems to function as it should when I increase the number of color spaces to maximum.

I’m having a problem with the box that pops up saying: Building color matching model, please wait….
Unlike previous versions of the tool, only part of the white bar goes red; after that, it stops and remains in place, even when the model has obviously been constructed and can be used to color-match images.

For me, the tool also seems slower than previous versions, even after selecting Fast processing mode. I’m using the default settings. Is anyone else experiencing this?

EDIT: Well, increasing the number of color spaces to maximum seems to increased the speed, which is the opposite of what I’d expect. The box that pops up has disappeared too. Strange!

Perfect timing!

Clutchins, please stop posting that.

Tyrphanax said:
You even fought off an “attack” tonight by going out and leaving your phone! That’s great news!

Absolutely! That’s real progress.

Dreamaster said:
Aspect Ration? Is the ‘n’ correct?

Non.

clutchins said:
Under aspect ratio, it says “Various”.

I noticed that too and didn’t know what to make of it.

Let’s hope it’s 4:3.

Mike O said:I felt way better. At least for a few hours.

Feeling better for a few hours is still progress. As you improve, these spells of wellbeing should occur more frequently and last last longer.

Spaced Ranger said:
I believe it!

I don’t.

AviSynth can decode MOVs with QTReader or QTSource. Try those. It’s been a while since I’ve used either. (I avoid MOVs like the plague.)

Also had v.2.6.0 installed once to try something from OT (with a few recommended plug-ins), but it wouldn’t work the script as it should’ve.

That’s rather vague, so I’m not sure what to suggest. While bugs are always possible, AviSynth is heavily used by some very knowledgeable people, so bugs tend to come to light. The frame-shifting problem that you’ve described sounds like it could be a decoding issue, and I’d sooner attribute it to that than to something fundamentally wrong with AviSynth’s ability to serve frames accurately. If you’re serious about investigating the problem, consider posting a thread over at Doom9 about it.

I guess the next thing to check into would be memory integrity (shudder).

Yes. That might be a good idea.

Spaced Ranger said:

I was going to show the results of this Avisynth script to align the 2 scans. On double-checking before posting, I noticed the video of one film was shifted by 1 frame even though none of the settings had changed (and were printed onto the picture). Going back and running it again, they then were properly aligned, with the same settings . .
Clearly something in Avisynth (this system is running v.5.8) is wrong and cannot be relied upon to serve up the correct images.

I rather doubt it. It sounds more like a decoding problem. What are you using to decode these videos and what format are they in?

By 5.8, I assume you mean 2.5.8. Try upgrading to the latest version. I prefer to stick to the 32-bit non-MT version.

You did have a victory. Resisting an impulse once means that you can do it again. The fact that you slipped afterwards doesn’t take that away and doesn’t mean that you’ll be unable to resist in future.

DrDre said:

The color correction tool v2.2 has been dubbed the color matching tool v1.0 to distinguish it from the upcoming color balancing tool v1.0. The functionality of the color matching tool v1.0 is the same as the color correction tool v2.2.

The white zone is for immediate loading and unloading of passengers only. There is no stopping in the red zone.

There is medication that can help with this sort of issue. I’ve known people who’ve taken it in response to watching distressing videos and the like and found it effective.

Not getting sick days doesn’t necessarily mean that you can’t alter your shift pattern in the short term, does it? If you’re busy with work, perhaps a family member might contact professional help on your behalf and arrange an appointment.

The fact that it takes all your energy to get up in the morning is a sign that what you are going through is taking its toll. Mental strain places physical demands on the body. It might be worth talking to your boss to see if it’s possible to cut back your hours/days temporarily. If you don’t make some adjustment soon, you’ll end up being signed off work or not being able to go in.

Mike O said:
No. I’m not sure I can. I keep doing it on breaks at work.

You certainly can take the steps that I suggested. You must have a means of access at work. If it’s a mobile device, give it to your parents. If it’s a work computer, ask your boss or a colleague to limit your access or something. There are ways round it.

Mike O said:
The compulsions are getting worse, and with less time between them.

Again, have you taken steps to restrict your access to material that distresses you?

Can therapy really help with this?

It won’t be a magic-bullet cure, but it will help and become one part of the solution. There are friends and family that will help. There is medication that might help.

Have you watched another video? If so, please try one of the steps that I suggested above. Give your parents your computer/telephone/television/anything that you use to access this material.

Mike O said:
I want to be able to watch a television show which depicts or has characters talking about these issues and observe the intellectual distance I did previously. I want to be able to read books and comic again, watch movies again, watch TV again, do things I enjoy again without this literally gnawing away at my mind. But I can’t.

I do understand what you’re describing. You’ve suffered some kind of trauma that has stripped away the shields/calluses that we all develop to stop ourselves from being emotionally affected by things that we frequently come across in day-to-life. As a result, anything that brings to mind what caused the problem (even in the most oblique way) causes you distress. It’s a bit like having the skin worn away to the point where touching anything hurts: it will heal, but you have to give it time.

Explain what you’ve told us to your parents (making the intensity of the problem clear), and ask them to help you restrict your access to things that set you off. You’ll be able to enjoy the things that you have described again, but not until you are better. I’m not saying that you have to give up television and the internet entirely (though this might be a good idea for a few days until you’ve had your first meeting with a therapist), but there are ways to limit your access.

Perhaps, you might agree to access the internet two or three times a week with a friend/relative sitting next to you so you can check your mail or whatever but have someone there if you are tempted to look at things you shouldn’t. A similar approach might work for television: work out what shows don’t set you off, and find a way of restricting your viewing to those. For some people, all they can watch when they have gone through this sort of thing is a particular children’s television series or a certain comedy or whatever. (People usually find something.) These are all just suggestions: you’ll have to work out a course of action that fits you, but I think it is important at this stage that you enlist other people’s help so you can avoid your triggers. (If you had an obesity problem, you’d be asking your mother not to buy cookies or whatever.)

I don’t know how to take this to a therapist because I have absolutely no idea what she’ll say!

You’ve explained it to us, so you can explain it to her. Don’t worry about what she’ll think, because no matter how bad or weird you think it is, therapists have heard it all before – believe me.

It’s incredibly stupid, but it feels like some sort of physical compulsion. Like a need. To do something which I know will upset me. It’s so stupid. All of this stuff is old anyway…
…It just endlessly circular!

You have managed to get yourself locked into a sort of loop. The fact that going over things again and again makes no sense and is not going to achieve anything does not matter any more, because the cycle that you have described is part of what’s going wrong, not something rational.

It sounds as if you are close to having a visit to a therapist lined up, which is great. Please do go through with it. Perhaps your parents might be able to pay for just the first session themselves before you finalize what the insurance can cover. Even a single visit could be immensely beneficial, and you might walk away with a prescription for something that might help.

Mike O said:
I just slipped again. This is horrible. I can’t stop. It’s getting worse.

You might try to find some way of limiting your internet access so that you’re not tempted to look at things that distress you. I know it’s hard, but you’re going to have to stop yourself from accessing these videos in the same way that someone who is trying to lose weight mustn’t have certain foods in the house. What you have described is almost certainly a form of obsession, but it also sounds like a kind of addiction too, so you have to avoid people, places, and paraphernalia – in other words, anything that might cause you to slip.

Nobody calls Williarob a rock and escapes a stoning.

Williarob said:
Sometimes I could recreate the missing frames, or find them on other prints, but here doubling existing frames seemed the best (or possibly just the easiest) choice - certainly better than black frames though.

You made the right choice. 😃