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The Rise of Skywalker: Ascendant (Released) — Page 491

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sherlockpotter said:

Alright, this may be stupid, but something is still nagging me about “We’ll kill him together.” It’s a tiny nag, admittedly - I think it’s because “We WILL kill him” comes across less like Kylo is imploring her to help him end the Sith, and more like, “Oh boy, here we go killing again!” It’s like Kylo cares more about killing this guy than he does about stopping the Sith. Maybe it’s just the way Adam Driver delivers the line? (Emphasis on “Kill” instead of “We’ll”?) I know, I know, it’s a subtle connotative difference; but it’s gnawing at me.

Plus, “We WILL do this” doesn’t really leave open any other choices for Rey, which - to me - deflates the tension of the moment considerably. “Of course Kylo’s wrong. She’s not going to start murdering people with him!” Rather than, “Oh gosh, Kylo has a point. What’s Rey going to do?”

So I made a quick mockup. Is it worth trying to iron out the new line? https://streamable.com/4tms6i

(Between this, “Become a Dyad,” and the eventual Rey Nobody replacement, we’re just going to change all of Kylo’s dialogue in this scene, aren’t we? Lol.)

EDIT: I also did a bit more work on this thingy: https://streamable.com/ffimpr

Blended out Palp’s Theme (I hope) a little bit better, cleaned up the word “a”, added a clip of Rey panting to cover up the omission of “and,” and also trimmed down the dramatic pause before she finishes her line (to help fudge the lip sync). Any better? The video cut on Rey’s line could be a little tighter and overlap the line on her catching the second saber more; I’m just worried about carving too deeply into the closeup shot.

Yes please. I like the change to the hanger scene line in the sense that, probably at this moment, Kylo doesn’t have a “plan” to deal with Palpatine’s “transfer plan” … but for sure he wants Rey to help him deal with Palpy. So by having the focus on “Join me and we can stop him” it works for both Kylo’s mindset (currently with this edit since Palps tells him about his transfer thing) and it would at least be a “reasonable” to try to sway Rey.

Also, YES PLEASE to the Palpy Rey scene. IT WORKS. The over confident Palpy, taunts Rey about her being a simple scavenger and Rey’s response … she now has overcome everything and perfectly responds, in essence “no, I am a JEDI ya wrinkly nerf herder!”

“Because you are a PalpaWalker?”

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sherlockpotter said:

EDIT: I also did a bit more work on this thingy: https://streamable.com/ffimpr

Blended out Palp’s Theme (I hope) a little bit better, cleaned up the word “a”, added a clip of Rey panting to cover up the omission of “and,” and also trimmed down the dramatic pause before she finishes her line (to help fudge the lip sync). Any better? The video cut on Rey’s line could be a little tighter and overlap the line on her catching the second saber more; I’m just worried about carving too deeply into the closeup shot.

I’m loving this change, but I feel the jump is still too noticeable around the 0:11 mark. Rey’s line change sounds flawless.

The Skywalker Saga:
I · II · III · IV · V · VI · VII · VIII · IX
This is the way.

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sade1212 said:

The problem with leaving in “I am all the Sith!” is that Rey’s new “I’m a Jedi!” response has to specifically be to Sheevie’s “a SCAVENGER GIRL is no match for the power in me!” statement, right? (edit: just as the poster above said!) Perhaps swapping Palpatine’s lines would work. Here’s a crude mockup of that idea (forgive the unpolished audio and lack of ghosts).

Edit: Does Rey ever refer to herself as a Jedi before this? I know Luke does, but I think that’s alright. It’s just that for this to land well, I think it has to be a ‘breakthrough’ in her confidence in herself, overcoming that self-doubt (which would be undermined if she’d previously considered herself a Jedi).

That was my thought exactly. It’s the contrast between “You’re just a scavenger,” “No, I’m a Jedi” that makes it work, imo. Sort of culminates her arc across the trilogy; and it’s much more personal now too. And you know what? I don’t think she does ever call herself a Jedi specifically - but it does tie back in to what Luke says in TLJ: “I will not be the last Jedi.”

You did a good job with swapping those two lines around! We could definitely go with that if Hal wants; but I thought he expressed some distaste for the “I am all the Sith” line in theatres. What say you, Hal?

The Rise of Skywalker: Untold - A “Rey Nobody” edit of Ep. IX | Looking for voices and VFX - Please reach out if interested!

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Don’t forget: “I will earn your brother’s saber.”

Rey does not think she is worthy of taking on the mantle. The change would show she is now accepting of her Jedi role, it’s a callback to TLJ, and I feel it helps sell “Rey Skywalker” a little more.

The Skywalker Saga:
I · II · III · IV · V · VI · VII · VIII · IX
This is the way.

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sherlockpotter said:

That was my thought exactly. It’s the contrast between “You’re just a scavenger,” “No, I’m a Jedi” that makes it work, imo. Sort of culminates her arc across the trilogy; and it’s much more personal now too. And you know what? I don’t think she does ever call herself a Jedi specifically - but it does tie back in to what Luke says in TLJ: “I will not be the last Jedi.”

While i kinda like the line “I’m all the sith!” because how over the top it is… I 100% agree that cutting it and having rey responding “No, i’m a jedi” to “You’re just a scavenger” would greatly improve the movie and fit more with her arc.

At this rate, with Ascendant V2 (Rey Nobody version), TROS is going to become a good movie…

This community is truly amazing.

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 (Edited)

sade1212 said:

The problem with leaving in “I am all the Sith!” is that Rey’s new “I’m a Jedi!” response has to specifically be to Sheevie’s “a SCAVENGER GIRL is no match for the power in me!” statement, right? (edit: just as the poster above said!) Perhaps swapping Palpatine’s lines would work. Here’s a crude mockup of that idea (forgive the unpolished audio and lack of ghosts).

Edit: Does Rey ever refer to herself as a Jedi before this? I know Luke does, but I think that’s alright. It’s just that for this to land well, I think it has to be a ‘breakthrough’ in her confidence in herself, overcoming that self-doubt (which would be undermined if she’d previously considered herself a Jedi).

This is one of those special edits. Such a simple change, but brought a smile to my face each time I watched it. I wholeheartedly think this is the solution. It keeps “I am all the Sith”, which allows Sheevykins to boast a bit longer before Rey slays him, which I think is better for the pacing of the scene than outright removing it. (Also, “You are nothing, I am all the Sith!” flows perfectly as a single sentence) But it still maintains the change everyone is loving here, where Rey retorts to being called a scavenger, not to the Sith comment. Well done!

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sade1212 said:

The problem with leaving in “I am all the Sith!” is that Rey’s new “I’m a Jedi!” response has to specifically be to Sheevie’s “a SCAVENGER GIRL is no match for the power in me!” statement, right? (edit: just as the poster above said!) Perhaps swapping Palpatine’s lines would work. Here’s a crude mockup of that idea (forgive the unpolished audio and lack of ghosts).

I really like this version. I feel like removing the “all the sith” line makes palpatine’s “you cant beat me” speech a tad short. Also, it really helps soldifiy the “all the sith spirits live in me because of the essence transfer”

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sade1212 said:

The problem with leaving in “I am all the Sith!” is that Rey’s new “I’m a Jedi!” response has to specifically be to Sheevie’s “a SCAVENGER GIRL is no match for the power in me!” statement, right? (edit: just as the poster above said!) Perhaps swapping Palpatine’s lines would work. Here’s a crude mockup of that idea (forgive the unpolished audio and lack of ghosts).

This is perfection and would be a mistake not to include.

The Skywalker Saga:
I · II · III · IV · V · VI · VII · VIII · IX
This is the way.

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 (Edited)

I really like what Sherlock did, just good work.

And to everyone, the ideas, samples, mock ups, etc etc has been great and just wow.

Fortunately, having some finished or usable items can be shared for people to do their own tweaks to Hal’s base is such a great thing. Just good stuff man.

Edit: not sure it’s possible, although I’m the Sherlock route of removing the all sith part, I would think it could help extend it and be a fall back to ROTS where he would say “I am the sith” … like he did about the senate. I know Hal removed it mainly for the better palpy mace exchange which I agree with. (I miss it though, 😂)

Anyway just random thoughts. I may have more for later.

“Because you are a PalpaWalker?”

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 (Edited)

TestingOutTheTest said:

I just want to address something about the pitched edit of removing the mention of Rey having a vision of both herself and Kylo Ren on the Sith throne. She didn’t have that specific vision at the beginning of the movie, she only had it when she touched the dagger on Pasaana.

It’s not shown on screen, and therefore is irrelevant. When Rey says she had a vision, the audience instantly should think of the one from the beginning of the movie since, ya know, it was shown. In fact, there is no proof that they ever recorded footage of both Rey and Kylo on the throne. So tbh, I’m not even sure what they were smoking when they wrote that line for Rey.

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Wow, Sherlock, that really works pretty damn well! I read about it and the discussion before being able to actually plug in earphones and listen to it.

But you know how this stuff always goes: it needs some improvement yet. I think Rey’s “[and] I” sounded just a little abrupt. Is there another instance of her starting a sentence with “I” in a similar voice that could be blended into it?
Her “I am a Jedi” seemed just a little quick. Could it be stretched out a little bit more?

And once we get it sounding flawless, I’d appreciate getting the individual single-channel stems for the dialogue changes. I don’t think I could resist trying to fold them in and sculpt the audio myself too on the off chance I could improve it or at least make it truly ‘native’ to the rest of the timeline.

This is an exciting change, but one that I would really only use if it was totally flawless. Which it is surprisingly close to being!

My stance on revising fan edits.

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I think @sade1212’s take is paced out well and “I’m a Jedi” didn’t sound too quick at all. Did you see his mockup? What’s the consensus on the “I"M ALL THE SITH!” line? Personally, I think it works better with it.

The Skywalker Saga:
I · II · III · IV · V · VI · VII · VIII · IX
This is the way.

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Also, suggestions for something to finish Kylo’s line with, using masked dialogue?

“We’ll kill him together _________.”

“We’ll kill him together [and nothing will stand in our way]” I think is what RogueLeader was pursuing.

I mean, it could be okay to just let Kylo talk about killing him. He killed Snoke and seemed like it would have killed Palpatine at the opening of TROS. So it’s in character for his motivations. But making it tempting for Rey is the thing. But he did just reveal that Palpatine killed her parents, and she says in the next scene that she would really like to kill him. Maybe it tracks well enough.

My stance on revising fan edits.

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I thought of a connection and a mental/logical/reasoning/insert-other-word/etc. if Hal you are good with adjusting Kylo’s line in the hanger to not explicitly say “kill Palpatine together” and more of “Let’s stop him together.”

So for Ascendant, we know Palps tells Kylo “Kill me and I transfer to you yo.”

So Kylo doesn’t want to do this, or at least is hesitant to it since, well, he has a problem. He wants to remove Palp as an adversary, but how? Also, I want myself some Rey-ness, maybe with our Dyadness, we can do something about it. Anyway, I’ll need to ponder on this.

So fast forward to the hanger. Kylo still has his “for sure goal” is to have Rey on his side. So let’s try to convince her that together, we can stop the Sith! We got Dyad power! How exactly do we do this? Well, let’s take this one step at a time. We got that ace up our sleeve with the Dyadness, maybe we can do something with that.

That doesn’t work, she rejects him again.

So now on the DSII, they have their duel, he gets stabbed, Mom dies … and get healed. He is finally getting drawn back to the light. But here is the problem, what can he do? Cant just kill Palpy since … he transfers, so it is a lose lose situation.

Then Han appears. Remember Han’s personality/style? Just do it and don’t think about it. Think back to TFA, the most recent thing about going to Starkiller base. We know he doesn’t plan things out fully, just goes with it. So with that pep talk and Kylo going back to Ben SOLO … aka, has some of dad’s personality … he knows he needs to stop Rey from getting Palpatined. That’s the immediate thing. What do you do after that? Well … we are winging it … so don’t give me the odds.

So you have Ben going there to STOP Rey from falling to Palpy’s trap. What to do after that? He is not sure.

BUT! Now with the Chosen Jonh who gave us the Force Ghosts at the end … the movie has an explanation on how to stop Palpy’s transfer. They do it. But needs Rey to face Palpatine and ACCEPTS SHE IS A JEDI. (Which is why I LOVE Sherlock’s change with Rey’s response. She finally accepts it. She finally opens herself to it and TRULY accepts her responsibility, as a Jedi. I think Ben’s redemption was the final push for her to “go all in” since it was something more tangible she sees.) It opens the way for Four Force Team. Everyone has their part and importance in the final scene. It is not about just the ONE person to stop Palpatine, it’s everyone … as the series tells us … it’s not just about the one, but the some.

This ends my terribly written Ted talk.

(Personally I will adjust my edit to remove all the Sith … and just focus on Palpatine … he figured it out finally and it fits, in my opinion, the cannon and what was shown/told us from the movies before. Either way people want it, the above still fits whatever direction.)

“Because you are a PalpaWalker?”

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jarbear said:

I thought of a connection and a mental/logical/reasoning/insert-other-word/etc. if Hal you are good with adjusting Kylo’s line in the hanger to not explicitly say “kill Palpatine together” and more of “Let’s stop him together.”

So for Ascendant, we know Palps tells Kylo “Kill me and I transfer to you yo.”

So Kylo doesn’t want to do this, or at least is hesitant to it since, well, he has a problem. He wants to remove Palp as an adversary, but how? Also, I want myself some Rey-ness, maybe with our Dyadness, we can do something about it. Anyway, I’ll need to ponder on this.

So fast forward to the hanger. Kylo still has his “for sure goal” is to have Rey on his side. So let’s try to convince her that together, we can stop the Sith! We got Dyad power! How exactly do we do this? Well, let’s take this one step at a time. We got that ace up our sleeve with the Dyadness, maybe we can do something with that.

That doesn’t work, she rejects him again.

So now on the DSII, they have their duel, he gets stabbed, Mom dies … and get healed. He is finally getting drawn back to the light. But here is the problem, what can he do? Cant just kill Palpy since … he transfers, so it is a lose lose situation.

Then Han appears. Remember Han’s personality/style? Just do it and don’t think about it. Think back to TFA, the most recent thing about going to Starkiller base. We know he doesn’t plan things out fully, just goes with it. So with that pep talk and Kylo going back to Ben SOLO … aka, has some of dad’s personality … he knows he needs to stop Rey from getting Palpatined. That’s the immediate thing. What do you do after that? Well … we are winging it … so don’t give me the odds.

So you have Ben going there to STOP Rey from falling to Palpy’s trap. What to do after that? He is not sure.

BUT! Now with the Chosen Jonh who gave us the Force Ghosts at the end … the movie has an explanation on how to stop Palpy’s transfer. They do it. But needs Rey to face Palpatine and ACCEPTS SHE IS A JEDI. (Which is why I LOVE Sherlock’s change with Rey’s response. She finally accepts it. She finally opens herself to it and TRULY accepts her responsibility, as a Jedi. I think Ben’s redemption was the final push for her to “go all in” since it was something more tangible she sees.) It opens the way for Four Force Team. Everyone has their part and importance in the final scene. It is not about just the ONE person to stop Palpatine, it’s everyone … as the series tells us … it’s not just about the one, but the some.

This ends my terribly written Ted talk.

(Personally I will adjust my edit to remove all the Sith … and just focus on Palpatine … he figured it out finally and it fits, in my opinion, the cannon and what was shown/told us from the movies before. Either way people want it, the above still fits whatever direction.)

And that is EXACTLY why TROS is my favorite Sequel Trilogy movie and a great continuation from both TLJ and TFA!

cries in alternate universe

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 (Edited)

Hahaha, boy oh man.

Truly, I don’t have a problem with Kylo wanting to goad Rey into helping him kill her. To me, I can infer the dyad thing Kylo drops accounts for things well enough. (It’s stupid, but at least the nuts and bolts of the “logic” check out.)

The more I think about it, I think just removing “[and] me [on the throne of the Sith, Finn]” and “We’ll kill him together [and take the throne]” would work just fine. Kylo stokes Rey into wanting to kill Palpatine by dropping some knowledge about her parents, and then tries to cash in.

My stance on revising fan edits.

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 (Edited)

I understand your view on it and Kylo’s thing can go to the “movie logic” philosophy, which I do support leaning on movie logic. And those are good points too about her parents as motivation. It’s one of those things that “on the other hand” he has “new” knowledge at the beginning of the movie where he didn’t on the original cut. Palpy transfer, so outright killing him is not a real option … which fortunately with Jonh’s The Forcey Boys is that answer.

I think i’ll personally use that direction, but that’s the beauty of this, we got a base and we can make whatever changes we need later. All in all, the changes thus far, and new things, are VAST improvements.

“Because you are a PalpaWalker?”

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sade1212 said:

The problem with leaving in “I am all the Sith!” is that Rey’s new “I’m a Jedi!” response has to specifically be to Sheevie’s “a SCAVENGER GIRL is no match for the power in me!” statement, right? (edit: just as the poster above said!) Perhaps swapping Palpatine’s lines would work. Here’s a crude mockup of that idea (forgive the unpolished audio and lack of ghosts).

Edit: Does Rey ever refer to herself as a Jedi before this? I know Luke does, but I think that’s alright. It’s just that for this to land well, I think it has to be a ‘breakthrough’ in her confidence in herself, overcoming that self-doubt (which would be undermined if she’d previously considered herself a Jedi).

I’ve been sort of silently watching these thinking “man, I wish it worked, but it just doesn’t.” But I think this arrangement here actually does it.

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The coloring is the right direction, that is crucial to add that to the edit so it doesn’t have to recycle Rogue One’s footage. (I am useless with colors, but it looks to be the right direction.)

“Because you are a PalpaWalker?”

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 (Edited)

sade1212 said:

The problem with leaving in “I am all the Sith!” is that Rey’s new “I’m a Jedi!” response has to specifically be to Sheevie’s “a SCAVENGER GIRL is no match for the power in me!” statement, right? (edit: just as the poster above said!) Perhaps swapping Palpatine’s lines would work. Here’s a crude mockup of that idea (forgive the unpolished audio and lack of ghosts).

Edit: Does Rey ever refer to herself as a Jedi before this? I know Luke does, but I think that’s alright. It’s just that for this to land well, I think it has to be a ‘breakthrough’ in her confidence in herself, overcoming that self-doubt (which would be undermined if she’d previously considered herself a Jedi).

Wow, the exchange here actually made me feel something. The pacing works better here than with the Sith line completely removed imo. Amazing and flawless work!

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Maybe because I’ve heard the original a thousand times but it feels a little weird going from you are nothing to the sith line, it might be worth it to put You are nothing at the end so Rey is directly responding to that. But that version is great too.

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I think it works:

Palpatine: “You suck, I rule”

Palpatine “You’re just a scavenger” Rey: “lolz nah i’m a jedi”

They play off each other quite well. Hope you don’t mind my abridged version.

The Skywalker Saga:
I · II · III · IV · V · VI · VII · VIII · IX
This is the way.