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The Force Awakens: Starlight (V1.1 Released!) — Page 29

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He hasn’t been in the movie at that point? It would confuse the audience, I think, and would seem incredibly out of place.

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snooker said:

He hasn’t been in the movie at that point? It would confuse the audience, I think, and would seem incredibly out of place.

Meh, the movie is already jumbled, and it would jolt people awake.

Ideally you would have my idea followed by Mark Hamill’s idea of the lightsaber shaking with the force and then flying not into Rey’s hand- but Luke’s.

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Even if that was a feasible idea, if Luke stole Rey’s thunder and came all the way to Starkiller base to face down Kylo Ren, what would the entire plot of TLJ be about?

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RogueLeader said:

Even if that was a feasible idea, if Luke stole Rey’s thunder and came all the way to Starkiller base to face down Kylo Ren, what would the entire plot of TLJ be about?

Luke showing us what he’s learned in his travels and Kylo chatting with Hayden’s ghost.

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This is a good ambitious edit, and I understand that much of your time right now is working on a house. Totally get it!

As for this recent clip, I see you got some work cut out for ya to remove the time stamp and Rey in the “Map” room.

after watching it a few times, I like the direction it is going. I appreciate the scene effect during her “Vision Dream.”

I am not a skilled editer, but I am curious if maybe instead of that effect you did, would it be possible to add a little more of a grain affect as well as changing the coloring in those scenes? Maybe less color and more of a sepia or something that shows this is indeed a vision?

Also, earlier during Rey’s Vision during the lightsaber touch at Maz’s castle can have the same effect so it will accomplish two things: 1.) these force visions have the same “effect” on the screen and 2.) we know Rey is having some kind of vision at the end with Luke on the island.

Other than that, the rest of it is looking good! Just a thought I had.

“Because you are a PalpaWalker?”

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 (Edited)

Update time! The move has gone well, the new floor is not yet installed but most other things are unpacked including my workstation. So I’m back at it, still trying to nail down this ending sequence right now:

https://vimeo.com/351538137

Password: fanedit

There are a great many changes to R2 searching for the map, Rey asleep (outside this time to make it clear that she isn’t just waking up inside the base somewhere), more dreamlike island shots recut in somewhat new arrangement, and recreated sound effects for the final shots of the edit.

ziggyonice said:

Welcome back, Nev. Good luck with the move into the house and looking forward to seeing your work again.

NeverarGreat said:
There was a bit of a lull in work today though, so I tinkered around a bit (more work on the Starkiller firing) and took another stab at parallel editing the Luke dream with full dream filters:

I think parallel editing is definitely the way to go here for the maximum benefit of the music.

First of all, I absolutely agree with you that the parallel editing is the way to go. It is far more polished makes the build up with the crescendo in the music much better than in the sequential version. Some may disagree with me here, but it looks super slick.

Secondly, a few notes…

  1. When Rey wakes up, I think we need to see a shot of the island from afar — maybe the ocean shots from The Last Jedi trailer? My thoughts here are that, in the current state, we see Rey wake up, but don’t have any indication that she ISN’T still on D’Qar. For all the audience knows, she was sleeping in a room with stone-lined walls to begin with at the Resistance base. So then it’s a little confusing if someone doesn’t notice the “dream effect.” Bottom line: can you fit an island shot in there, just as she wakes up and just before R2-D2 wakes up?

I definitely took these critiques into consideration with the latest version, with two fixes for it.

  1. I compared this most recent edit with your previous take and I noticed you swapped the position of the scenes where C-3P0 says, “R2 has some much-needed good news.” Just my opinion, but I think the original placement was better. With the new position, Leia says “Tell me” just before we see Luke for the first time and I think it distracts from his reveal. Maybe you could put that scene just after the really wide / faraway shot of Rey climbing up the mountain?

Again, agreed on these points and the structure has been adjusted for a better flow.

  1. I wish there was more music here to fit more shots in. Are you open to repeating the first couple verses of The Jedi Steps to fit in more? Like, I think it’s important that we see the map piece from BB-8 be hooked up to match the map that R2-D2 is showing. If you had just a few more seconds, I think it could be done. Any chance you might be willing to consider repeating the first ~10-15 seconds of the song? Or maybe you could use some of the extended version of the song from the suite?

That is a really cool suite, and I’m tempted to use it because of the clear changes in mood which would fit well with the parallel editing. Unfortunately it does sound like a different orchestra from the one in the film, so I’m going to stick with the original cue unless there are simply too many things to pack into it.

As for BB-8 contributing his piece of the map, that has always bugged me for several reasons. First, why would Tekka have part of the map and R2 does not? This would indicate that the entire galaxy was mapped in the time of ANH except for one small piece with the location of the Last Jedi Temple, and it’s bizarre that Tekka finds a piece that perfectly matches a map made forty years ago and downloaded from the Death Star. Second, if the entire galaxy was known to the Empire at that time except for that one piece, the New Republic should certainly know of this map forty years later and it would then be trivial to match the missing piece up to the available cartography. My reasoning for R2 showing the full map is that he could easily have downloaded that piece from BB-8 offscreen, or he could have had it fully assembled from the beginning. I kind of like the idea that R2 had the entire answer all along, and all it took was someone who would listen to BB-8 and take his idea seriously.

One last reason I’m leery of including BB-8’s contribution is that a lot of it includes Rey, and one shot in particular would have to be cut entirely due to her presence.

As always, great work. Hope to see you again soon.

Thanks!

jarbear said:

This is a good ambitious edit, and I understand that much of your time right now is working on a house. Totally get it!

As for this recent clip, I see you got some work cut out for ya to remove the time stamp and Rey in the “Map” room.

You notice that I’m saving that fun-filled activity until the end 😉

after watching it a few times, I like the direction it is going. I appreciate the scene effect during her “Vision Dream.”

I am not a skilled editer, but I am curious if maybe instead of that effect you did, would it be possible to add a little more of a grain affect as well as changing the coloring in those scenes? Maybe less color and more of a sepia or something that shows this is indeed a vision?

I’ve tried adding a horizontal blur to several of the shots to indicate the insubstantial nature of this vision, and given Luke’s shots in particular a brighter grade which serves to desaturate the colors.

Also, earlier during Rey’s Vision during the lightsaber touch at Maz’s castle can have the same effect so it will accomplish two things: 1.) these force visions have the same “effect” on the screen and 2.) we know Rey is having some kind of vision at the end with Luke on the island.

That’s an interesting idea, I may try a vignette and see how it looks.

You probably don’t recognize me because of the red arm.
Episode 9 Rewrite, The Starlight Project (Released!) and ANH Technicolor Project (Released!)

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Looks real good, Nev! Glad the move-in has gone well.

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NeverarGreat said:

Update time! The move has gone well, the new floor is not yet installed but most other things are unpacked including my workstation. So I’m back at it, still trying to nail down this ending sequence right now:

https://vimeo.com/351538137

Password: fanedit

Zoo wee mama that’s pretty sexy. I like the concept, but also I just wanna say how much I love some of the details, too, like there being no iris before the credits, we just pan to the starfield.

Reading R + L ≠ J theories

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That’s really fantastic - the only comment I have is that in the scene where Luke turns to her it’s a bit too foggy that the whole background looks white, as if you were going for an unreal dreamscape, but then you get more details. It was a little jarring, I’d tone down the fogging just a little.

The Clone Wars: Refocused | Andor: Movie Omnibus

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Wow, that’s absolutely fantastic work! I think I’m definitely sold on this interpretation of the ending now.

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Gotta agree with everyone here. This is looking so good! The red lights and beeping sounds really help the R2 shots. I know it probably won’t work but it would still be nice to have Rey wake up from the dream (using the shot of her waking up from TLJ)…but it would probably screw up the timing of the music.

SSWR’s YouTube channel

Attack of the Clones: Alternate Timeline Edit Thread:
https://originaltrilogy.com/topic/SSWRs-Attack-of-the-Clones-Alternate-Timeline-Edit/id/66888

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This deal is getting better every time! , what do you think about having a white fade-in when the dream starts and a white fade-out when it ends instead of the dreamy filter just like you did when focusing on luke, it’s more subtle but it really drives home that it’s a dream.

Peace is a lie
There is only passion…

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Absolutely gorgeous work.

This is the best version you’ve put together, and I really do not have much to say about it — which is a good thing. Here are my notes:

  • The ocean/beach sound effect has a loud bird chirping that I found a little annoying and distracting. Could you use a different take? I’m not opposed to the occasional bird sound (it is an island, after all). The bird sound effects when she wakes up is fine. But this one bird in particular on the ocean/waves crashing sound effect is chirping a little too often and a little too loud. It’s coming from the left channel and you can hear it even on the far away shot of the island. On a separate note, if you wanted, I would be okay with a distant porg sound effect once or twice to better connect it to to TLJ.

  • The sound effect when the light fades onto Rey’s face and she wakes up is perfect. I don’t know what that is — some sort of mysterious scraping sound — but whatever it is, it’s great.

  • I like that you can hear C-3P0 distantly saying “general” before it shows Leia.

  • The white bloom effect and blur that reveals Luke is great. The fade to white at the end is really a great touch.

  • Can you turn up the volume just a little bit on the Force theme that plays when Rey is holding out the lightsaber? I think it’s just a tad too quiet compared to the swelling music that plays immediately after.

  • Interesting choice to remove Rey calling Finn her “friend” when she says thank you. I’m not complaining. I actually think this is a good decision, as I always thought it sounded a little unnatural.

It’s looking really, really good. I watched this like 20 times, haha.

“The Ziggy Edit” — A Conceptual Fanedit of Return of the Jedi

https://originaltrilogy.com/topic/Episode-VI-Return-of-the-Jedi-The-Ziggy-Edit/id/17844

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Yeah I dunno…maybe I should just go back to the original ending.

😉

Seriously, thanks everyone.

I thought it would be a good time to take a step back and look at the whole third act as it is now, so I rendered out a test from the Hux speech onward (I think the Restructured placement of the Hux speech is much better and works as a clear indication of the beginning of the final conflict in the film). The good news is that a lot of it works, but the bad news is that I still don’t think the Starkiller infiltration works nearly as well as it could. The Kylo on the Falcon scene seems unmotivated, and it generally feels unfocused. It’s very noticeable when comparing the infiltration and Reyscue to the Kylo/Han confrontation. Kylo needs to be more proactive in his actions. I’m also bothered by the addition of more loose threads where Phasma is concerned. So here’s a new sequence, which I will test when I get some time:

-Rey’s failed escape attempt
-Falcon flies in, crashes
-Rey’s successful escape
-Kylo discovers Rey’s absence
-Han and Finn discuss how to get in
-General Hux update
-Rey runs through the halls
-Han and co are through the doors, Finn has a plan
-Kylo is informed that sensors are triggered, worries about Rey’s power
-Rey enters the hangar
-Phasma goes to investigate, is taken out by Chewbacca and Finn orders her around
-Troopers walk past Rey hanging out on the wall
-Phasma lowers the shields but activates the silent alarm as Han and Finn discuss her fate
-Kylo is updated, is concerned about her stealing a ship, hears the alarm: ‘Han Solo’
-Hux deploys the fighters as Rey goes into hiding on the wall
-The Resistance goes in, encounters resistance
-Han and co rescue Rey, they leave the base
-Kylo searches the Falcon, notices the sun dimming, looks out at the battle
-The battle goes ill for the Resistance, Han and co decide to help
-The Oscillator is infiltrated
-Kylo arrives at the Oscillator

With this sequence, Kylo has much more information than my previous edit. Now he knows that Rey has escaped, and when the alarm is triggered he senses Han and knows that his ship is how Rey will leave. Thus he immediately goes there to wait, and since this waiting happens as Han and co are returning to the Falcon, there should be a lot more tension in the scene.

You probably don’t recognize me because of the red arm.
Episode 9 Rewrite, The Starlight Project (Released!) and ANH Technicolor Project (Released!)

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Interesting thought process. It isn’t something I would initially think about, but I see where you’re coming from now that you illustrate it. You’re basically trying to find a good way to reorganize it where character motivations flow well.

So in this format, Kylo goes to the Falcon after the battle has already started rather than right before the Resistance arrives. I do think it would create tension like you said, since we would think Han and Co are on their way back there. Also, Kylo going back outside to look at the battle, and maybe see that the Resistance is failing to do any damage, he might predict that his father would try to do something to help, which he does in the very next scene.

I know he originally knows they’re there because they make some racket trying to get into the Oscillator, but this restructure could imply more that Kylo knows his father, and uses that knowledge to predict what he’s going to do. That, plus your other changes, would make Kylo seem much more active than before.

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This looks awesome! Can’t wait to see it when it’s ready.

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The new structure works for the most part. I ended up dropping the scene where Kylo talks about Rey’s power for two reasons; the first is that Rey’s powers speak for themselves at this point, and the second is that the trooper’s line was used for the Phasma conversation.
I also moved the part of the Kylo Falcon scene where he steps outside to right after Han decides to go into the Oscillator. It still needs work.

The Kylo Falcon scene still felt a bit jarring no matter where it was, so I created a new shot to introduce the scene (and give our first glimpse at the reclusive First Order speeders):

https://vimeo.com/352819835

Password: fanedit

You probably don’t recognize me because of the red arm.
Episode 9 Rewrite, The Starlight Project (Released!) and ANH Technicolor Project (Released!)

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Cool idea! Looks pretty good I think. I think we take for granted how a well-placed establishing shot can help buffer a scene. It’s a thought I’ve had recently while I’ve been thinking about Prequel edit ideas.

When you originally talked about it, I liked the idea of the transition from Kylo looking outside, to the dogfight, then down to Han and co. also watching the dogfight. But you should trust your judgement. I would like to see some mockups up the scene orders you’re thinking about.

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I really like what you’ve done with the ending. I’m wondering if it could be trimmed more and still be as effective.

After Rey is staring at R2 and BB8:
-Outdoor night shot
-R2 hooked up
-Rey sleeping
-Island establishing shot
-R2 waking up
-Closeup of Luke turning around
-3P0 informing Leia about BB8
-Luke lifts hood
-R2 displays map
-Luke staring at camera while fading to white
-Leia says “Luke”…

Only seeing Luke from Rey’s point of view might make it feel more dreamlike. Rey arriving on the island and wandering around in TLJ will be something we wouldn’t have seen before.

This is just a thought and isn’t meant to take away from what you’ve already done. Great job and I look forward to seeing your final edit.

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RogueLeader said:

Cool idea! Looks pretty good I think. I think we take for granted how a well-placed establishing shot can help buffer a scene. It’s a thought I’ve had recently while I’ve been thinking about Prequel edit ideas.

When you originally talked about it, I liked the idea of the transition from Kylo looking outside, to the dogfight, then down to Han and co. also watching the dogfight. But you should trust your judgement. I would like to see some mockups up the scene orders you’re thinking about.

When I get the Falcon scene in some presentable shape I definitely will share a mockup, as there are quite a few small changes that have been implemented since the last version.

JEDIT: Here it is

https://vimeo.com/353066606

Password: fanedit

DigMod said:

That establishing shot looks fantastic!

Thanks, it’s basically a digital version of this effect:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YdHTlUGN1zw&t=3s

I cut the still image into five planes and zoomed them towards the camera at differing speeds to achieve the 3D effect. The large areas of featureless white snow helped to hide some of the seams.

jkimm said:

I really like what you’ve done with the ending. I’m wondering if it could be trimmed more and still be as effective.

After Rey is staring at R2 and BB8:
-Outdoor night shot
-R2 hooked up
-Rey sleeping
-Island establishing shot
-R2 waking up
-Closeup of Luke turning around
-3P0 informing Leia about BB8
-Luke lifts hood
-R2 displays map
-Luke staring at camera while fading to white
-Leia says “Luke”…

Only seeing Luke from Rey’s point of view might make it feel more dreamlike. Rey arriving on the island and wandering around in TLJ will be something we wouldn’t have seen before.

I have considered removing some of the wide shots like the one with Rey and Luke and the cliff on the left, and you’re right that it would probably heighten the dreamlike nature of the events, but on the other hand a lot of these shots are the best in the scene, compositionally. There’s only so much of the scene that can be removed without losing some of the essence of what made the original scene work.

After making a version with and a version without the TLJ Rey waking up shots, the version without feels much more sudden and less dreamlike. Going from the night shot, to Rey, to R2, to Rey fading into her waking up, makes for a much smoother flow into the weirdness of the Dream/Vision. It’s the difference between telling the viewer that the dream is happening and immersing them in the moment.

You probably don’t recognize me because of the red arm.
Episode 9 Rewrite, The Starlight Project (Released!) and ANH Technicolor Project (Released!)

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Just watched your ending draft. I really like how you use force visions to move the story without it being actually done. Would it be possible to show Rey waking up after her vision? Love the generator connected to R2 and that night time shot of the Resistance base with the Spielberg shooting star is gold 😃

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