hinventon

That all sounds good. Although I prefer the wording of “The force alone made us…” or “We’re a creation of the force…”

We should make a list of all the dialogue changes for this version and maybe start generating some of the lines and see how they sound. Not that we should stop brainstorming, there’s potential for so many different variations of this scene that I’d love to see.

The line for Luke you suggested is great, I think I would include that over the Leia stuff. It’s already implied by Leia’s dialogue earlier in the movie that she can tell Rey is struggling with something.

I do like the Leia part of that but having Luke specifically talk about the reveal in more depth would help sell the edit more. If the Leia stuff was kept, I think it should just be that Leia saw the same visions of Rey and the throne, not that she knew exactly what her origin was.

True. I think the only line that feels weird with this version is Luke saying “Because you’re a palpatine?” I feel like he wouldn’t call Rey a Palpatine directly like that knowing he came from the same method of creation. So maybe we could change that to phrase it slightly differently.

I think that’s solid, probably as good as we’re gonna get with the force creation idea. I don’t think it’s too complicated at all and ties everything together nicely. I think I’d only have a question on why she’s referred to as a Palpatine when the Skywalkers aren’t when they were created in the same way.

I think besides a true Rey Nobody version, the force creation with no parents angle is my favorite. The only wrinkle is that it’s not explicitly said that the force chooses a random woman in the galaxy, but I think you can infer that. Below is basically the same with a couple lines changed. I like the idea that maybe Rey’s parents saw the darkness in Rey and sold her because they were afraid of what she was. I would probably freak out too if I were them.

“I pushed you in the desert because I needed to see it… I needed you to see it… who you are. The dark side is your birthright, Rey…”

“You’re lying.”

“I’d never lie to you. Your parents were no one. Junk traders expecting a child they never wanted.”

“Don’t!”

“Your parents, Rey… they had no part in your conception…”

“I don’t want this!”

“…just like Vader.”

“No!”

“You’ve seen it, haven’t you? Your destiny.”

(Rey sees the vision of herself on the Sith throne)

“Your parents were afraid of your power.”

“Stop talking.”

“The same way Luke was afraid of me.”

(Cutaway to heroes capture)

“The Force showed me glimpses of a girl like you long before we first met. When we fought, in the forest, the power inside of you awakened. You didn’t just reveal yourself to me… you were exposed to the Emperor… just as he’d intended.”

(Visions of Rey beating Kylo on Starkiller, falling into the dark cave, etc.)

“No!”

(A pedestal shatters and the mask of Vader falls to the ground)

“So that’s where you are.”

“Before you chose the Jedi, Palpatine wanted you alive."

“No…”

"I’ll come tell you why.”

“Rey… I know the rest of our story.”

“Tell me.”

"The Emperor manipulated the Force itself into creating life. First my grandfather, and then you. You were his chosen heir. You… are a rightful Palpatine.”

"The Emperor only wants us to fight each other, so his most worthy heir can claim the throne. But he hasn’t realized the strength of our connection, Rey… a bond, not of blood, but of power in the Force. We’ll end him and the Sith, and create a new order, together…”

I like the version Hal shared too, although I would prefer to keep her parents irrelevant. I don’t know if the horcrux idea can be properly explained in such a short space for it to work.

I’m not sure, I was under the impression that is was RL or Hal or both of them.

I agree, but I’d love to see 2 get made eventually. Do we have a clean version of the scene? I’m not sure if it exists since the current Rey nobody edit just cuts out much of the dialogue.

I think for a true Rey Nobody edit it makes sense for her power to awaken on Starkiller. But I don’t know if it would work to have that be true and have her connected to the emperor.

I agree. The force is in her already, but she rejects it in the beginning of the film. The “awakening” is Rey choosing the force, and taking up the role of the hero.

Off topic edit suggestion: add Anakin’s theme to the reunion scene at the end of the film. Originally, Yoda’s theme and Luke/Leia’s theme plays for seemingly no reason. But with the force ghost climax, it makes sense as the spirits of the Jedi live in Rey. Adding Anakin’s theme would support this and allow for some more prequel music in this movie, tying all the film’s together a little better.

I think we had it with the last write-up of the scene give or take some semantics and vocab. Everyone has the force, Rey was just able to accept it and let it flow through her on Starkiller. She accepts the role of the hero by taking up the sword she refused earlier, the same as Luke does in TLJ. I do think I prefer Rey being a sith counterpart to Anakin, but I don’t mind tying in the rest of the saga by making the Skywalkers Palpatine’s creation, too.

I like that, but it feels a little vague as to what Rey and Palpatine’s relationship actually is, and why she’s a Palpatine. Perhaps we should develop 3 separate versions of this scene:

1. True Rey Nobody - No parents and no connection to existing characters. Would focus on Rey’s dark visions and her burden of carrying the legacy of the Jedi. Would probably have to change music/trim scene so it seems like less of a reveal.

2. Rey Palpatine - Rey is a clone/force creation of Palpatine. This version keeps her good parents in order to salvage as much footage from the original film as possible.

3. Rey Nobody Palpatine - Rey is a creation of Palpatine, but her parents are not mentioned or relevant to the story. Keeps a big reveal while still maintaining continuity from TLJ.

I’m not sure if I prefer 1 or 3 more. I think 3 works best to preserve continuity and still keep the core of TROS intact, but there is something so charming about Rey truly being a nobody who was chosen by the force when the moment called for it, it’s very Arthurian and a great idea for a character in a trilogy mainly about legacy.

I honestly never noticed that shot was reused, it kind of bothers me more that BB8’s face is flipped because it’s immediately obvious that the shot is flipped. Not that important at all but it always bugged me when they did that with R2 and Boba in the OT.

I like the idea that they need to fight because Palpatine has put so much effort into grooming Ben. Whoever kills the other will be cemented in the dark side and be a suitable heir. The plan is disrupted when no one dies and Ben is redeemed, making Rey the only option.

I think that works great. Preserves all of TLJ while still letting there be an actual reveal. Now we just need someone to make a clean version of the scene so we can plug in the dialogue - I would attempt it but I’m not great with audio.

The current Nobody version of Ascendant just cuts that line about her parents and I didn’t notice on my viewing after not watching the actual film for a while. So I think it would be fine, Rey’s character just has to be consistent between the two scenes.

I don’t think the parents need to be explained or focused on. We just need to write in a way where it makes sense for Rey to want to destroy Palpatine as that’s the next thing she says. Maybe ending on something like “We’ll kill him, and end the sith/war, together…” I don’t think promising to finish what Vader started is going to appeal to Rey that much.

Here’s another variation where Palpatine doesn’t know where Rey is, and waits for the force to awaken in her, revealing herself to him. This also works for Anakin, as you could say that through the force, Qui gon and Obi Wan found him, revealing Anakin to Palpatine. I removed her parents completely and in this version Palpatine doesn’t create Anakin, but that’s just preference and you could easily reinsert the lines that communicate that. This works best with TFA Starlight and Rey’s sith eyes in that moment.

“I pushed you in the desert because I needed to see it… I needed you to see it… who you are. The dark side is in your nature, Rey…”

“You’re lying.”

“I’d never lie to you… your parents were no one. Junk traders expecting a child they never planned for.”

“Don’t!”

“Your father had no part in your conception.”

“I don’t want this!”

“…just like Vader.”

“No!”

“You see it, too, don’t you? The throne.”

(Rey sees a flash of the vision of herself on the Sith throne)

“Your family feared you. The same way Skywalker feared me.”

“Stop talking.”

“But they didn’t know you like I do.”

(Cutaway to heroes capture)

“Palpatine knew your true potential… your power. The first time we fought, in the forest, the darkness inside of you awakened. You revealed yourself to the emperor that day… just as he planned."

(Visions of Rey beating Kylo on Starkiller, falling into the dark cave, etc.)

“No!”

(The mask of Vader falls to the ground)

“So that’s where you are.”

“Before you chose the Jedi, Palpatine wanted you. I’ll come tell you why.”

“Rey… I know the rest of your story.”

“Tell me.”

“Because he manipulated the dark side of the Force itself into creating life. You’re his creation, his chosen heir. You, are a Palpatine.”

"The Emperor wants us to fight each other so the strongest may take the throne. But what he doesn’t know is that we’re a dyad in the Force, Rey… two, that are one. We’ll kill him, and finish what Vader started, together…”

Yeah, I think that scene works fine within the context of your write-up. I think it only feels weird if you go with the dark vision route as it is in Ascendant at the moment, because the “reveal” is that Rey will kill Palpatine, which she clearly is upset about. It doesn’t really make sense if she immediately says she wants to destroy him. I think what you have is pretty solid for a scumbag parent edit, I would maybe change some of the wording, but I like the ideas. The only question I would have is why Palpatine didn’t know where Rey was in the first place, as I would assume that if he created both Anakin and Rey he would control where they end up. But that can probably be explained with some clever wording.

I agree. That would be easy to do and even if Hal didn’t want to do that we could make a separate edit ourselves. I think you could cut the parent vision and not replace it as long as kylo says something that elicits Rey’s reaction. And VFX for the ship would help but if it’s not in this film you only see it in TFA so it’s not a huge deal.

Yeah, I think that could work too. But I’d still like to make a version where Rey’s parents are unimportant. We’d just have to think of a backstory that makes sense. You could say Palpatine put Rey on Jakku on purpose, but then there needs to be a reason why he focuses on Kylo. You could also say that Palpatine didnt know where Rey or Anakin were and got lucky that quigon found Anakin, but that makes Palpatine look sort of inept.

It’s just sort of vague how she is a more “perfect” creation than the Skywalkers. If anything, Anakin was more powerful and more susceptible to the dark side than Rey. I think Kylo can recognize where his family came from while actively choosing the dark. He doesn’t want to be like Vader, he’s actively looking to destroy the sith and start something new. He’s trying to be better. The imagery of Rey and Kylo destroying Vader’s mask supports this. Perhaps you could hint at this earlier in kylos visions. I’ve seen people talk about the fan film where Kylo kills Vader, and while I wouldn’t want to use the whole thing, maybe a few shots from that could reinforce this point.

I agree that Kylo wouldn’t admit that about Vader, so maybe change that line back. But, I think the idea that Kylo comes from the light and chooses the dark and Rey comes from the dark and chooses light one of the most interesting parts about them, and what makes the dyad so strong. Besides, it’s not about where they come from, but the decisions they make for themselves. That’s the point of Rey’s story, after all. And if they both have the same origin, what makes Rey’s journey different?

“Rey…wherever you are…You are hard to find."

“You are hard to get rid of.”

“I pushed you in the desert because I needed to see it…I needed you to see it…who you are. The dark side is in your nature, Rey…”

“You’re lying.”

“You were right…your parents were no one. Junk traders expecting a child they didn’t ask for.”

“Don’t!”

“But your father had no part in your conception…”

“I don’t want this!”

“… just like my grandfather.”

“No!”

“Palpatine chose you.”

(Rey sees the vision of her on the sith throne.)

“I’ve seen it just as you have.”

“Stop talking.”

“Rey…I the know the rest of your story.”

(Cutaway to heroes capture)

“Palpatine tried to find you when you were young. He sent his hunters after you. He knew the power you possessed… The darkness."

“So that’s where you are.”

“You know why Palpatine was searching for you. I’ll come tell you.”

…

“Why did the Emperor come for me? Tell me.”

"Because he manipulated the dark side of the force itself to create life. You’re his creation, his chosen heir. You… are a Palpatine.”

"My family was created by the light. And you, the dark. What Palpatine doesn’t know is that we’re a dyad in the Force, Rey… two, that are one. We can end the Sith, and bring a new order to the galaxy, together…”

“You know what you need to do. You know.”

“I do.”

…

Slightly altered some of RL’s ideas. The light created the Skywalker’s, but Palatine used the dark to create Rey. His experiment worked, but he didn’t know where Rey ended up, so he focused on Ben in hopes that Rey would reveal herself. Parents are removed. Ochi could have still been looking for Rey, but never killed her parents. Once she was born, they sold her and left Jakku. Would only take a slight vfx edit in TFA to change the ship in the flashback. Also requires removal of the “dead in a paupers grave” line in TLJ, but makes sense with those changes.