Neglify

TV's Frink said:

Nope.

"Irrational Man" (2015) written & directed by Woody Allen 

Without a doubt, the worst movie Woody Allen has made in the last 10 years. I went into this absolutely cold (and completely high). All I knew was the title, it's a Woody movie and it stars Joaquin Phoenix. 

I've been a Woody Allen fan since I was 12, and I've watched everything he's done. And I'm telling you right here right now, he phoned this one in. The script is just absolute garbage, with such shallow characters, and every line of dialogue is superficial and only exists to tell the audience what they need to know. For the majority of the film I kept wondering if this was an intentional troll film. Like, what if Woody made himself a bet that he could write a script in one day, then film it without any rewrites.

There's a line of dialogue early on that stayed in my mind throughout. Abe (Joaquin) is teaching his Philosophy class and says something like "Philosophy is just verbal masturbation." That's exactly what this film is, verbal masturbation.

But, it's not a complete Piece of Shite. The actors do the best they can with their roles, and the overall concept is great. But it's clear that Woody has delivered a dud. 

Not his first misfire and certainly not his worst film, but man what a huge disappointment. It's a sad day when I realize that "Hot Tub Time Machine 2" had a better script than the new Woody Allen film.

** / 5

Frinktions.

Originality of joke - 2/10
Execution - 5/10

I got "Rambo - First Blood Part II" and "Don't You (Forget About Me)" by Simple minds. Not bad.

DuracellEnergizer said:

Tobar said:

DuracellEnergizer said:

Plus, it had Keanu Reeves; virtually every movie he appears in is ruined by his mere presence.

Not a fan of the movie, but I'll admit he doesn't bring it down (He's no worse than everyone else around him). 

Mavimao said:

Neglify said:

LexX said:

GL's other movies, THX-1138 and American Graffiti. Also many Disney movies, like The Lion King.

What was changed in American Graffiti? I'm too stoned to Google. 

 If my memory serves me correctly, the biggest change is the opening shot with the diner. They digitally erased the buildings behind it and put in a new sunset. The rest is unchanged apart from some DNR. 

Ah. Well, at least it's a bit of a minor change (aside from the DNR), so it's not like he re-edited it so Greedo shoots Bob Falfa and that's what causes him to roll his car. That'd be some bullshit.

Possessed said:

Share your good booze!

True story below. 

So, I live in a neighborhood one might easily call a "ghetto". A couple months ago I was strolling the streets cadging for loosies. Outside the subway station, across the street from a liquor store, a chap I hadn't met struck up a conversation with me. He didn't have Kools or Newports to spare, but he held in his hand a bottle of a magic potion he brewed himself. 'Twas a mixture of vodka and malt liquor, a swill I had yet to consume.
He told me he had to catch the train in a few minutes and he wouldn't be able to drink it all himself, but if I had a cup, he'd certainly divvy up the hooch. "Good sir," said I, "while I am touched by your unselfishness and would love nothing more than to storm the ramparts with you... sadly I am not the type of lad who carries clean cups." He nodded, "Yeah me neitha." Then he guzzled half of it down without a snag. He held the bottle up the moonlight and kissed it good night. Then he tipped his hand and poured out a lil' liquor.
Then I found someone else to give me a fag. 

LexX said:

GL's other movies, THX-1138 and American Graffiti. Also many Disney movies, like The Lion King.

What was changed in American Graffiti? I'm too stoned to Google. 

SilverWook said:

I goggled the name for laughs, and the first result is a phone number. Not dialing it though.

It's probably Frink's mom. 

I want to see the Star Wars Christ Mad Special.

ray_afraid said:

I had 10 it for about five minuets 

Do you play "Minuet of Forest" from Zelda: Ocarina of Time on a loop to gauge how much time has past? 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=944E2kT1oes

^I giggled.

Thank you for taking the test! Here is your results:

As you can see, the majority of your scores are at the top. Except "Happy" and "Composed" are at 0. This means one of 2 things: either you're an android, or you're a spy. Either way, I have to blast you with a disintegration ray.

Awesome7 said:

Hey Neglify! its your old Pal BloodLust!

They should start playing "Spider Solitaire" a way way better Windows card game.

You should get your cat a "one-spitter" whatever that would be.

Possessed said:

Danfun128 said:

There's no such thing, unless you mean Windows 9x :P

 Are you suggesting that something Frink said wasn't on the level?  Because I won't stand for it.

But you will sit for it. 

TV's Frink said:

DuracellEnergizer said:

On a whim, I just checked DrCrow's profile to see if he's visited the forum at all since that fateful day last month, and it appears he just checked in yesterday.

 Go home, you're drunk.

Should he go to your home? 

Danfun128 said:

I'm trying to download a certain torrent. ATM the torrent has only two peers: One with about 15% and another with 100%. For whatever reason I can't download from the peer with 100%. I wish I knew why...

I hate when that happens. Torrents can be great and completely unreliable about 50/50. 

Oh, you were talking about crack pipes, my bad.

Possessed said:

One hitters > No hitters

Especially when the hit is in the 19th inning.