DuracellEnergizer

I’ll do better next time. I promise.

Respect didn’t keep them from giving a big FU to his ST story treatments.

★★★★★★★★☆☆

★★★★★★☆☆☆☆

★★★★★★★☆☆☆

★★★★★★★☆☆☆

MST3K version

★★★★★★★★☆☆

Non-MST3K version

★★☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

MST3K version

★★★★★★★★☆☆

Non-MST3K version

★★★☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

MST3K version

★★★★★★★☆☆☆

Non-MST3K version

★★★★☆☆☆☆☆☆

MST3K version

★★★★★★★★★☆

Non-MST3K version

★★★★★☆☆☆☆☆

MST3K version

★★★★★★★★☆☆

Non-MST3K version

★★★★★☆☆☆☆☆

MST3K version

★★★★★★★★☆☆

Non-MST3K version

★★★☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

RicOlie_2 said:

Because eternal salvation is a lot more important than 80-or-so years on earth.

This mindset is why traditional Christianity is distasteful to me. It places evangelism over compassion for your fellow man, and it paints God as an asshole; the former is dehumanizing, the latter frankly blasphemous.

And now that we’ve minimized the spread of so many diseases, the risk of spreading disease is a lot less than it once was.

Still too great for these people, it would appear, or it wouldn’t be illegal to make contact with them.

Fang Zei said:

But I honestly wonder if there still couldn’t have been a way to tell a story set 41 years after Endor and within the same continuity as the EU that didn’t require audiences to know what had transpired in that time.

Sure. Just set your story 200-1000 years into the future, don’t use any OT characters, and don’t reference any events from the post-ROTJ SW Universe. Which is as it should’ve been, since the window of opportunity for a proper ST starring Luke, Leia, et al. closed after the early '00s.

I’m not proud of my arsenal. I only delight in the advantage it gives me over others.

LordZerome1080 said:

You’re probably gross

No “probably” about it. I’m certainly gross.

LordZerome1080 said:

SilverWook said:

DuracellEnergizer said:

LordZerome1080 said:

DuracellEnergizer said:

LordZerome1080 said:

fmalover said:

The Star Wars franchise has been inconsistent in their portrayal of Dark Side corruption.

In the OT the only instances of Dark Side corruption are Vader and the Emperor, with both having very pale skin, and in the Emperor’s case in particular, yellow eyes. Later we meet Darth Maul, who has the yellow eyes characteristic of the Dark Side, but retained his youthful appearance throughout the twenty years leading up to the Battle of Yavin. Count Dooku shows no signs of Dark Side corruption implying his fall to the dark side has been relatively recent or he doesn’t draw from the Dark Side as much as others do. ROTS really screws up the whole notion of Dark Side corruption by revealing the reason Palpatine looks the way he does in the OT is because of Mace Windu deflecting the Force lightning back at him (I always assumed it was because of his many years immersed in the Dark Side), and finally we have Anakin Skywalker whose eyes only turn yellow when he’s really angry or something. Finally we have Snoke and Kylo Ren, with Snoke looking very old and decrepit but doesn’t have yellow eyes even though he’s established to be a longtime practitioner of the Dark Side, and Kylo Ren who been a Dark Side practitioner for at least ten years yet doesn’t show the slightest hint of Dark Side corruption.

This franchise seriously can’t make up its mind regarding the whole dark side corruption subject.

I will help you with that, Disney doesn’t count as cannon. Only the Expanded Universe counts as cannon in this case, cause the EU makes sense when it comes to Dark Side Degradation.

They’re both cannon because they’re both explosive and damaging.

Why so much EU hatred from you Duracell?

Because 50-60% of it is deleterious garbage. But that should please you, no? That leaves 40-50% which is better than anything Disney has churned out.

Are you Kethleen in disguise or something?

No, but I wouldn’t pass up the chance to get in her pants.

Again, please keep such desires to yourself.

It makes me uncomfortable

LordZerome1080 said:

DuracellEnergizer said:

LordZerome1080 said:

fmalover said:

The Star Wars franchise has been inconsistent in their portrayal of Dark Side corruption.

In the OT the only instances of Dark Side corruption are Vader and the Emperor, with both having very pale skin, and in the Emperor’s case in particular, yellow eyes. Later we meet Darth Maul, who has the yellow eyes characteristic of the Dark Side, but retained his youthful appearance throughout the twenty years leading up to the Battle of Yavin. Count Dooku shows no signs of Dark Side corruption implying his fall to the dark side has been relatively recent or he doesn’t draw from the Dark Side as much as others do. ROTS really screws up the whole notion of Dark Side corruption by revealing the reason Palpatine looks the way he does in the OT is because of Mace Windu deflecting the Force lightning back at him (I always assumed it was because of his many years immersed in the Dark Side), and finally we have Anakin Skywalker whose eyes only turn yellow when he’s really angry or something. Finally we have Snoke and Kylo Ren, with Snoke looking very old and decrepit but doesn’t have yellow eyes even though he’s established to be a longtime practitioner of the Dark Side, and Kylo Ren who been a Dark Side practitioner for at least ten years yet doesn’t show the slightest hint of Dark Side corruption.

This franchise seriously can’t make up its mind regarding the whole dark side corruption subject.

I will help you with that, Disney doesn’t count as cannon. Only the Expanded Universe counts as cannon in this case, cause the EU makes sense when it comes to Dark Side Degradation.

They’re both cannon because they’re both explosive and damaging.

Why so much EU hatred from you Duracell?

Because 50-60% of it is deleterious garbage. But that should please you, no? That leaves 40-50% which is better than anything Disney has churned out.

Are you Kethleen in disguise or something?

No, but I wouldn’t pass up the chance to get in her pants.

“Larger than Life” by The Backstreet Boys

“Rasputin” by Boney M.

I see a difference.

LordZerome1080 said:

fmalover said:

The Star Wars franchise has been inconsistent in their portrayal of Dark Side corruption.

In the OT the only instances of Dark Side corruption are Vader and the Emperor, with both having very pale skin, and in the Emperor’s case in particular, yellow eyes. Later we meet Darth Maul, who has the yellow eyes characteristic of the Dark Side, but retained his youthful appearance throughout the twenty years leading up to the Battle of Yavin. Count Dooku shows no signs of Dark Side corruption implying his fall to the dark side has been relatively recent or he doesn’t draw from the Dark Side as much as others do. ROTS really screws up the whole notion of Dark Side corruption by revealing the reason Palpatine looks the way he does in the OT is because of Mace Windu deflecting the Force lightning back at him (I always assumed it was because of his many years immersed in the Dark Side), and finally we have Anakin Skywalker whose eyes only turn yellow when he’s really angry or something. Finally we have Snoke and Kylo Ren, with Snoke looking very old and decrepit but doesn’t have yellow eyes even though he’s established to be a longtime practitioner of the Dark Side, and Kylo Ren who been a Dark Side practitioner for at least ten years yet doesn’t show the slightest hint of Dark Side corruption.

This franchise seriously can’t make up its mind regarding the whole dark side corruption subject.

I will help you with that, Disney doesn’t count as cannon. Only the Expanded Universe counts as cannon in this case, cause the EU makes sense when it comes to Dark Side Degradation.

They’re both cannon because they’re both explosive and damaging.

EXT. SMALLVILLE — GAS STATION — DAY

Kenny is seated on a bench out front, reading a paperback, when a car pulls up to the pumps. Setting down his book, Kenny rises and goes to his customer.

DRIVER

50¢ of gas. And give my windshield a cleaning, if you please.

KENNY

Not a problem, sir.

Cleaning the man’s windshield, Kenny then fills the tank. Once that’s done, the driver pays Kenny.

KENNY

Have yourself a fine day, sir.

Replying with a nod, the man pulls out and away.

Lana, on her bicycle, is riding along the side of the road. Nearing the gas station, she gives Kenny a wave. Taking off his cap, he waves back, smiling.

EXT. HELEN’S HOME/FRONT YARD — DAY

Lana parks her bicycle at the front step. Taking a leather portfolio up from the bike basket, she goes to the door and knocks.

INT. HELEN’S HOME/BEDROOM — DAY

Clark and Helen are together under the sheets. Lying flat on her back, Helen stares deep into Clark’s eyes. He freezes in mid-thrust.

HELEN

Why’d you stop?

CLARK

There’s someone at the door.

HELEN

(laughs) You can’t hear the door from here.

CLARK

I heard it.

HELEN

(sighs) They’ll go away.

Conceding her argument, Clark resumes his stride.

EXT. HELEN’S HOME/FRONT YARD

Lana knocks again. When Helen fails to answer the door a second time, Lana tries the knob. Finding the door unlocked, she slips inside.

INT. HELEN’S HOME/ENTRANCE HALL — DAY

LANA

Aunt Helen? Lana. (beat) I have those papers for you….

Lana creeps deeper into the house.

INT. HELEN’S HOME/BEDROOM — DAY

The lovers moan.

INT. HELEN’S HOME/HALLWAY OUTSIDE BEDROOM — DAY

From here, Lana can hear the lovemaking occurring in the bedroom. Curious, aroused, she silently creeps down the hall to the bedroom door, which is a crack open.

INT. HELEN’S HOME/BEDROOM — DAY

Deep in the throes of passion, neither Helen nor Clark notice the crack in the door widen.

INT. HELEN’S HOME/HALLWAY OUTSIDE BEDROOM — DAY

Discretely peering through the gap, the wry smile on Lana’s lips dies as she spies who is with her aunt.

INT. HELEN’S HOME/BEDROOM — DAY

Arms and legs wrapped around Clark, Helen climaxes.

INT. HELEN’S HOME/HALLWAY OUTSIDE BEDROOM — DAY

Lana steps back, dropping the portfolio to the floor. The door then swings open of its own accord, leaving the two parties in full view of each other.

CLARK

(surprised) Lana!

Shocked, embarrassed, Lana dashes off.

CLARK

Wait! Lana!

Pulling away from Helen, Clark retrieves his pants and struggles into them.

EXT. HELEN’S HOME/FRONT YARD — DAY

Hopping on her bicycle, Lana kicks off, pedalling furiously to put distance between her and the cottage. Clark bursts through the front door.

CLARK

Lana!

Not stopping, not circling back, Lana angrily wipes unbidden tears from her eyes.

EXT. KENT FARM — CORN FIELD — DAY

To the back of the tractor has been hitched a reaper-binder. As Martha guides the tractor through the rows, the corn stalks are collected into the binder, automatically tied into bundles, then deposited out the back on the grass.

Some hours later.

Clad in purple flannel shirt and blue overalls, Luma goes about collecting the corn bundles from the ground, using her super strength to handle multiple bundles in both arms at once, using her super speed to stack them into shooks in a fraction of the time it would take a team of humans to complete the task.

As Luma finishes arranging the last shook, she hears a plaintive cry. Following the sound, she looks up to find a red-tailed hawk gliding through the sky, its wings spread wide. She scrutinizes the raptor. A sense of familiarity falls over her.

INT. BARN/LOFT — DAY

Clark stands by the open loft door, looking out across the property, pensive. Hearing the creak of wood behind him, he looks over his shoulder to find Lana climbing the ladder. Reaching the top, she rises, facing Clark, face dark.

CLARK

(uncomfortable) Hi.

Lana approaches him.

LANA

How long?

CLARK

Lana —

LANA

I know what I saw, Clark. Just tell me … how long?

CLARK

Coming up on a month now.

LANA

(nods) She is a handsome woman.

Something catching her attention, Lana glances over Clark’s shoulder. Outside, Luma stands facing the barn. The bob-wearing Kryptonian looks up at them, studying them.

LANA

(frowns) Who’s that?

Clark looks outside.

CLARK

(thinking) My cousin.

LANA

You’ve never mentioned her before. (beat) Where’s she from?

CLARK

Far away. Quebec.

At Clark’s touch, they leave the open door. Deeper into the loft’s shadows, Clark gently takes Lana by the shoulders, gazing into her eyes imploringly.

CLARK

Don’t tell anyone.

Lana studies Clark’s eyes. Closing her own, she leans forward and plants a tender kiss on his cheek. Stepping away without a word, she returns to the ladder.

Clark touches his cheek, feeling the lingering warmth of her kiss.

You don’t know the impotence of the light side.

Sorry, but without Sam Eagle, something fundamental’s missing.

I’m an Aing-Tii fan, thank you all very much.

I want my first child to be a girl. Call me a reverse sexist if you will, but all my adult life I’ve preferred girls over boys and would prefer a daughter before a son.

Someone needs to invent an alcohol substitute which possesses all the beneficial qualities of alcohol with none of its deleterious ones.

pittrek said:

However I could barely make it through season 1 of the new show and I couldn’t force myself to see the other seasons. Too much religious crap for me

Now I’m almost tempted to give the reboot a second chance — almost.

pittrek said:

I loved That '70s show.

I was able to watch That '80s Show.

That’s the Prequel Trilogy for you.

Perhaps it’s Mid-Atlantic. 😛

DrDre said:

DuracellEnergizer said:

Voss Caltrez said:

DuracellEnergizer said:

Voss Caltrez said:

Luke using the dark side to choke out the guards at Jabba’s palace.

Actually, this is one of the tidbits of ROTJ I do still like. It’s morally gray stuff like that the film needed much more of.

But who is Darth Henrietta? The Emperor?

Yeah. With the makeup, cackling, and aerodynamics, ROTS Palpatine brings to mind Henrietta from Evil Dead II.

Supposedly, it was done to make audiences unsure of whether or not Luke would become like his father, or stay on the good side. If that’s the reason, that’s cool.
But still, I thought that once you start down the path of the dark side, forever it will consumes you.
If he’s using the dark side of the Force, he must have been practicing it to some degree. And it’s like, why would he do that? How can you pick and choose when you’re going to use the dark side, and still not become evil?
And I thought the Force was only for knowledge and defense, never for attack.

The Jedi interpretation of the Force is just that — an interpretation. Just because they view the Force through some quasi-Objectivist framework which recognizes no shades of gray doesn’t mean the Force is truly like that.

The greatest failure of the SW films — and the franchise as a whole, really — is this idea that the Jedi have the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth on the Force and that any path differing from theirs is deficient.

I disagree. It is Lucas who invented this universe and its rules. He deliberately opted to introduce the concept of the Force and a dark side, a universe without many shades of grey. It is not a fault, it is part of its identity. I don’t see why the Star Wars universe should be made to conform to our own real world sense of morality. In my view this weakens the mythology.

I guess you could say this is among the top 3 reasons why I’m a lapsed Star Wars fan. Not only do I no longer believe in its fundamental worldview, I find that worldview utterly repugnant.

oojason said:

^ Was she in Fringe or similar sci-fi/mystery series a few years back??

Yep, she was in Fringe.