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Possessed, your fight against alcohol is an example to me. You gained my profound admiration.
Possessed, your fight against alcohol is an example to me. You gained my profound admiration.
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I guess what I’m trying to say is that I’m not okay, and that’s okay, because maybe I am okay, or will be okay, if that makes sense.
Yes, it’s okay! It’s good to acknowledge to yourself what you are feeling and why. Sometimes it can be a good thing to look at your feelings from an outside perspective, and hopefully find that things are normal and will get better with time.
Getting over a crush is one of those things where you’re dealing with feelings rather than an actual problem, you are still the same person as you were before having those feelings and life goes on, yet something feels wrong. Just allow the feelings to come to you, process them, and in time you can move on.
So I’m still getting over my stupid crush (mentioned several pages ago) and I’m still sad and all but it’s… different. This is the first time I’ve ever let myself have a crush on a guy without just forcing myself to repress it and never mention it to anyone ever, so even though things obviously didn’t work out how I wanted, but at least I’m actually allowing myself to process my emotions I guess. For example, I used to cringe, or even get angry, any time I heard the word “crush,” and to be fair, it’s still a stupid word, but I can use it without feeling a wave of terrible anger and embarrassment wash over me.
I guess what I’m trying to say is that I’m not okay, and that’s okay, because maybe I am okay, or will be okay, if that makes sense.
Man. I hear you. I totally get the angle this comes from. I hope you know you’re not alone. You totally remind me of how things were for me around your age.
I read your posts and they have such a familar echo. It’s like I was back over there. Back living things they way they were before everything fell apart.
So you’re special to me man. I want you to know you give me a sort of hope that a guy could imagine a different life in a way. I mean that a guy could start from the same root, but change paths enough to not fall into the trap I laid out.
Peace.
K. Let’s have this ride.
Good to see you around, Trident.
Good to see you around, Trident.
That.
Good to see you around, Trident.
That.
This.
The Person in Question
Good to see you around, Trident.
That.
This.
These.
Good to see you around, Trident.
That.
This.
These.
Good to see you around, Trident.
That.
This.
These.
chyron just put a big Ric pic in your sig and be done with it.
Thanks guys. I’m finally down-shifting a bit. So I might finally get some time to hang on a bit harder.
That is if I ever catch up to you guys again. I mean I’m so far behind reading this site it’s like I’m in a different time-stream 😉
K. Let’s have this ride.
Possessed, your fight against alcohol is an example to me. You gained my profound admiration.
Don’t admire me. I’m only even alive because I can’t get a gun and I’m too chicken shit for any other method of killing myself. And I’m only still sober so that the few people who still give a shit about me don’t get upset.
You’re conflating the healthy human instinct of self-preservation with being chicken shit.
The Person in Question
I disagree but it’s a fair assessment.
Possessed, your fight against alcohol is an example to me. You gained my profound admiration.
Don’t admire me. I’m only even alive because I can’t get a gun and I’m too chicken shit for any other method of killing myself. And I’m only still sober so that the few people who still give a shit about me don’t get upset.
Sorry for the late reply, but hard disagree - it takes a lot more courage to fight on than to just give up. You can tell yourself these things that you wrote, but I think you’re more than that and I think you know it. I wouldn’t consider you “too chicken”, I’d say you’re too brave to give up, if anything. So… there’s that.
Mfm has a very good point too.
My votes with them. Don’t crack down too hard on yourself man. You’re still a lot stronger than you give yourself credit. I mean look at all the shit you’ve been thru? And yet here you still are. So that’s a proof point right there
K. Let’s have this ride.
Okay I’ll lay it out for you. I won’t do any other method because a failed attempt would be worse than dying, human weakness would cause me to fail I’m sure. With a gun I need only to get in place for a moment and pull the trigger. I can’t get a gun due to being hospitalized with suicidal thoughts a few years ago.
The only reason I’m alive currently is because I’m on a list. Am I saying I would kill myself right now if I could? Maybe. I don’t know. Probably. But would I have at some point between the start of this year and now? Definitely. But it’s not as easy to get a gun on the black market as many would have you think.
But the praise and admiration for “how brave” I am stops here and now.
I wouldn’t know anyone here from a stranger if I met them in real life, and maybe I even have. We all spend more time stewing in our own shit than thinking about other people’s shit, and that’s just the human condition, not selfishness. Nevertheless, Possessed, I would encourage you to stick with this existence. This tiny corner of the world that hardly anyone knows or cares about would be emptier without you. You would be missed. By a bunch of strangers, perhaps, but missed nonetheless.
I agree.
The Person in Question
Oh I’m popular enough in real life that it would be a huge deal around these parts if I died. But I’m tired of staying alive just to please others. I’m well liked, but not well cared for. And that’s okay, it’s only my own weakness that causes me to care about that. Nobody owes me anything after all.
You’re worthwhile, Possessed. It says something positive that you’re well liked, and not just that others are pleased. You’re a young guy and you can find those who will show the care you need if you’re not getting it now. You deserve to be happy.
The blue elephant in the room.
Okay I’ll lay it out for you. I won’t do any other method because a failed attempt would be worse than dying, human weakness would cause me to fail I’m sure. With a gun I need only to get in place for a moment and pull the trigger. I can’t get a gun due to being hospitalized with suicidal thoughts a few years ago.
The only reason I’m alive currently is because I’m on a list. Am I saying I would kill myself right now if I could? Maybe. I don’t know. Probably. But would I have at some point between the start of this year and now? Definitely. But it’s not as easy to get a gun on the black market as many would have you think.
But the praise and admiration for “how brave” I am stops here and now.
This scares me. Possessed, please don’t kill yourself. Listen to what others have said, you’re worthwhile, your life is valuable. Please tell someone in real life you are thinking this way and ask for help.
You’re worthwhile, Possessed. It says something positive that you’re well liked, and not just that others are pleased. You’re a young guy and you can find those who will show the care you need if you’re not getting it now. You deserve to be happy.
This.
I agree with the other sentiments that have been posted. You would be missed. I don’t know anything about rehab from addiction or depression, but I think you can live a happy fulfilling life if you’re strong enough to last through this difficult time. I believe in you. I’ll be praying.
Army of Darkness: The Medieval Deadit | The Terminator - Color Regrade | The Wrong Trousers - Audio Preservation
SONIC RACES THROUGH THE GREEN FIELDS.
THE SUN RACES THROUGH A BLUE SKY FILLED WITH WHITE CLOUDS.
THE WAYS OF HIS HEART ARE MUCH LIKE THE SUN. SONIC RUNS AND RESTS; THE SUN RISES AND SETS.
DON’T GIVE UP ON THE SUN. DON’T MAKE THE SUN LAUGH AT YOU.
Wanting to die has nothing to do with addiction. I haven’t shared the reason and I’m not going to.