Star Wars: The New Dawn (The First Episode in DuracellEnergizer's New PT Re-Write) *COMPLETE* — Page 4

Yeah, I've noticed that. I got a fair bit more feedback back when I was writing my first Ep. I rewrite. Perhaps there was more activity on the boards back then, though -- I can't remember.

Yeah, there doesn't seem to be a lot of activity in this part of the forum. There are only two threads in the Script Writing section that I've read, including this one and I doubt many do much more reading than that over here.

Regarding the gory scene that I was whining about: it's better now, so I'll stop criticizing it. :)

INT. NYAX/BRIDGE

The Force Hound sits upon the command chair with his aide by his side, watching the Light Hammer succumb to the Mandalorian assault on the viewscreen.

MANDALORIAN SENSOR OFFICER: The Imperial dreadnaught is crippled, milord!

FORCE HOUND: (to the communications officer) Order all ships to stand down.

The Mandalorian communications officer relays this command to the other Mandalorian ships. Within moments the attack ends, leaving the crippled Light Hammer floating in space.

FORCE HOUND: (cont'd) Order the Deinonychus to make its descent at the pre-arranged coordinates.

The communications officer relays this to the Deinonychus, and in moments one of the Mandalorian dreadnaughts begins making its descent to the desert planet below.

MANDALORIAN AIDE: All due respect, milord, but we should destroy the Imperial ship and be done with it.

FORCE HOUND: No, Karras, not when there is someone on board waiting to meet us. (rises from his seat) Assemble a boarding party and alert my shuttle to prepare for my arrival.

EXT. TATOOINE - ANCHORHEAD - DOCKING BAY 32 - DAY

Obi-Wan and Anakin exit Docking Bay 32, various bags of luggage with them, and begin crossing the street.

OBI-WAN: Remind me again why we couldn't just leave for Alderaan in the Twilight and spare us from using the fare which will only take us halfway there?

ANAKIN: Like I said, the ship belongs to Watto -- Owen and I simply used it on his behalf to ferry down spice for him. And there's no functional hyperdrive, either -- just try making a trip to the Core on those crappy sublight engines.

OBI-WAN: (sighs) I suppose spending fourteen or fifteen months on Ogana Major won't be that bad ...

ANAKIN: If I could have spared the cash --

OBI-WAN: (waves his hand dismissively) Nevermind that, Anakin. (beat) You get used to the torrential downpours after awhile, anyway.

ANAKIN: (grins) You mean rain? That'll be awesome! I've never seen rain before!

OBI-WAN: After you leave Ogana Major, you'll never want to see it again. (beat) I suppose the rate for taking a taxi to Mos Eisley hasn't changed since I was here last.

ANAKIN: Oh, I don't think so. (beat) When was the last time you were on Tatooine, anyway?

OBI-WAN: Actually, I never --

Before the Jedi can complete his thought, a strange mechanical noise begins to fill the air, growing louder with each passing moment until it becomes a deafening roar, causing everyone in the area to cover their ears with their hands, grimacing in pain. Looking up towards the sky, Ben and Anakin watch as the Deinonychus comes down over the town like a descending bird of prey.

OBI-WAN: (horrified) Oh, no ...

ANAKIN: (yelling over the noise) What is it?!

OBI-WAN: (yelling over the noise) Anakin, run!

Roughly grabbing the young man by his arm, the Jedi knight breaks out into a run up the street. They don't get very far, however, as the Deinonychus begins firing upon the town, obliterating whole buildings with single blasts and killing hundreds in the process. As the townspeople of Anchorhead rush to flee the bombardment, the dreadnaught proceeds to unleash its contingent of Kom'rk-class fighters, all of which descend upon the fleeing masses like a swarm of angry hornets.

Little can be done as the dreadnaught continues to bombard the town and the fighters cut down the townspeople caught out in the open. Within ten minutes, Anchorhead is reduced to nothing more than a smouldering ruin, most of its residents dead or seriously injured.

INT. LIGHT HAMMER/BRIDGE

Inside the Light Hammer's bridge, flickering light playing over him, Bail sits hunched over in his command chair, rubbing his temple to rid himself of a burgeoning headache; Vaness, trying to comfort him, rubs his left shoulder.

BAIL: What a disaster ...

Siri, who alone on the bridge has tried to remain calm and in control of her emotions, begins to grow visibly uneasy.

SIRI: Admiral ...

BAIL: (looks up at the Jedi) What is it, Ms. Tachi?

SIRI: The Mandalorians are boarding us ...

INT. LIGHT HAMMER/DOCKING BAY

A shuttlecraft enters the deserted docking bay of the Light Hammer and touches down on the metal deck. As the hatch lowers, over two dozen Mandalorian Knights begin filling out, the Force Hound himself in the lead.

INT. LIGHT HAMMER/BRIDGE

BAIL: (rises from his seat) If those bucketheads think we're going down easy, they've got another thing coming. (beat) We go down, we take as many of them with us as we can.

INT. LIGHT HAMMER/CORRIDOR

As the Force Hound and his warriors move along the corridor leading towards the bridge, several of the crew members who survived the attack on the Light Hammer leap out of the dark corners of the ship to attack the invaders, opening fire with their blasters. The Force Hound easily avoids the blasts, using the Force to telekinetically hurl and push the Imperials out of his way.

INT. LIGHT HAMMER/BRIDGE

Stepping away from Vaness and the command chair, Bail walks past Siri until he stands facing the sealed door which leads in-and-out of the bridge.

BAIL: Everyone get ready -- company's coming.

INT. LIGHT HAMMER/CORRIDOR

As the Force Hound walks past the defeated Imperials lying sprawled out on the deck below him, his warriors unsheathe their swords and proceed to slay the defenseless soldiers.

INT. LIGHT HAMMER/BRIDGE

SIRI: (unclips her lightsaber) They're here.

BAIL: (unholsters his blaster and adjusts its settings) All right, everybody -- take out your blasters and set them on "kill".

The officers on board the bridge take out their blasters and set them on their commanding officer's ordered setting. Siri engages her lightsaber, holding the fuschia blade before her in a defensive position.

As they stand there, their weapons armed and levelled at the closed door, they begin to sweat profusely as the sound of the door's gears grinding fills the air.

ADNEZZAR: I knew I should have stayed home today.

With a horrible squeal of grinding metal, the bridge door is forced open and the Force Hound steps through.

BAIL: Open fire!

Before most of the bridge officers can obey the Admiral's command, the Force Hound uses his powers to push half of them back, slamming them into consoles and seats and knocking them senseless. The advantage now in his favour, he steps aside to allow his warriors to step through, and they immediately go on the offensive, swords swinging.

The rest of the officers -- Bail and Vaness included -- immediately counterattack firing their blasters, and Siri springs into action with her lightsaber swinging. However, as the Mandalorian Knights are all Force-sensitive and all wield swords of preternaturally durable Mandalorian iron, the counterattack proves less than fully effective.

Rage fueling him, Admiral Bail Organa manages to take out five Mandalorians, killing three of them with precisely aimed and fired shots from his blaster while knocking the other two right out with powerful punches and kicks to vulnerable areas to the body. When one of the Knights slashes his gun arm through the elbow, though, nearly cutting his lower arm off, and sends him hurling into the bulkhead with an incredibly powerful toss, his role in the battle comes to an end.

Commander Raia Vaness, her body toned and honed with years of exercise and training, makes progress against nine of the Mandalorians, killing nearly half of them while injuring the rest. She goes down, though, when one of the Mandalorians manages to strike her in the back of the head with the pommel of his sword, knocking her unconscious.

Swinging her lightsaber, Siri Tachi tries to decapitate one of the Knights, but he quickly brings up his impervious sword, blocking the energy blade. Throwing out a fist, she punches the Mandalorian back instead, then spins around to attack another Mandalorian.

A master sharpshooter, Mr. Solo takes out seven Mandalorians with expertly placed shots to vulnerable areas of their bodies. He can do nothing, though, as a Mandalorian strides past his defenses up to him, shattering his knee with a well-placed kick, and then grabs hold of his face and slams his head back against the edge of the computer console behind him, killing him instantly.

Roaring with intense rage, Dnezzar leaps at the Mandalorian who killed Solo, tackling him to the deck. Grabbing the Mandalorian by the helmet, he begins slamming the warrior's head down over-and-over again until the Mandalorian stops moving. He doesn't get the opportunity to relish his victory, however, as another Knight beheads him before he can even stand back up.

Nebucha dies screaming as he is slammed through a console, electrocuting him.

Eventually, all fall except Siri, who stands before the remaining Mandalorian Knights drenched with sweat and breathing heavily, her fuschia blade glowing with fierce intensity before her.

SIRI: (grits her teeth) Savages.

Rearing her lightsaber back, she pounces, bringing the fuschia blade down towards the closest Mandalorian Knight.

Suddenly she stops in mid-strike, dropping her lightsaber as she utters a sharp gasp. An invisible grip pulls her up into the air and she reaches for her throat, gurgling as she begins to choke.

Pushing past his warriors, the Force Hound walks up to Siri, his right hand raised and clenched into a tight fist.

FORCE HOUND: We'll have no more of that, my dear.

Gurgling, Siri tries once to reach out at him with her left hand, but the intense pressure at her throat immediately dissuades her from the effort.

FORCE HOUND: (cont'd) It's time for you to go to sleep.

Wheezing, Siri's mouth begins to foam up and her eyes roll up into the back of her head. Unclenching his fist, the Force Hound releases his hold on her, allowing her to fall to the deck and breathe once more.

FORCE HOUND: (to the other Mandalorians) She's unconscious. Take her and bring her to the shuttle.

Obeying immediately, two of the Knights rush over to Siri. Pulling her up, they waste no time and move quickly to take her off the bridge.

MANDALORIAN #3: Some of the Imperial dogs are still alive, milord.

FORCE HOUND: Let them live. (beat) Let the rest of the Empire hear the tale of our day's victory from their comrades' own lips. Let them learn to fear the name "Mandalorian" once more.

With that, the Force-sensitive Mandalorians begin filing out of the Light Hammer's bridge, their job complete.

As the last of them exits the bridge, the Force Hound notices Siri's lightsaber lying abandoned on the deck. Reaching down, he picks the weapon up, and holds it up before him. Studying it momentarily, he then lowers it to his side and proceeds to follow after his minions.

EXT. TATOOINE - ANCHORHEAD - STREETS - DAY

The Mandalorians, having landed their fighters, are now searching the ruins of the town on-foot for any survivors, their blasters held at the ready.

INT. DEMOLISHED BUILDING - DAY

Ben and Anakin hide within the interior of a partially-demolished building, crouched down low over a window that looks out into the street. As the Mandalorians appear around the corner, they duck away, returning to the window only once they've passed on by.

ANAKIN: Who the hell are these guys?

OBI-WAN: Judging by the armour, I'd say they're Mandalorians.

ANAKIN: (shocked) Mandalorians? I thought they were wiped out in the First Clone War.

OBI-WAN: Not exactly. Their throneworld was decimated in the civil war that followed the assassination of Mandalore the Destroyer, and their civilization quickly disintegrated afterwards as a result, but various individual pockets survived and continue to exist. (beat) Without central leadership, many Mandalorians have since become pirates, mercenaries, and bounty hunters.

ANAKIN: What are they doing here? Tatooine has nothing of any value!

OBI-WAN: I don't know, Anakin, I honestly don't. (beat) Do you know how to operate a Mandalorian fighter?

ANAKIN: What kind of question is that?

OBI-WAN: A necessary one, because we're going to have to borrow a pair.

ANAKIN: What!?

OBI-WAN Do you have a better idea of getting us out of here? (beat) We can't use a landspeeder -- it wouldn't be fast enough to take us out of here before we were detected and destroyed. And the Twilight's out of the question as well; provided that it wasn't destroyed in the initial attack, it, too, is far too slow to evade the Mandalorian ships. That only leaves us with the fighters, which are incredibly fast, maneuverable craft.

Unable to offer up any better alternatives, Nik raises his hands in a gesture of placation.

OBI-WAN: Alright, then -- follow me.

Together, the Jedi and his ward slowly leave the crumbling building, taking care to look out for Mandalorians. Certain that they won't be spotted, they hurry along their way, staying close to the sides of the buildings while stopping to peer around corners.

Eventually, the pair finds their way to the parked Mandalorian fighters. Unfortunately, stationed on guard are three Mandalorian lookouts. Quickly, the two hide behind the large, fallen corner of a building before they can be seen.

ANAKIN: Great -- guards!

OBI-WAN: Don't worry. They're momentary obstacles at worst.

ANAKIN: Are you gonna take them out with your lasersword?

OBI-WAN: I don't think it'll have to come to that.

Leaning out around the corner of their hiding spot, Ben quickly throws his hand out toward the Mandalorian guards.

MANDALORIAN #4: (hears a sound) Hey, what was that?!

MANDALORIAN #5: (points toward a space between two buildings standing in the distance) It came from over there!

Wasting no time, the three Mandalorians take off to track down and ascertain the source of the sound they heard. Once the armoured warriors have disappeared between the two buildings, Ben and Nik come out of hiding and run up to a pair of waiting fighters.

ANAKIN: (feeling around the hull for an opening mechanism) I don't know how to get it open!

OBI-WAN: (turns to assist Anakin) Here, like this --

As the Jedi goes to help the boy, the Mandalorians who have been making their rounds throughout the demolished ruins of Anchorhead return.

MANDALORIAN #6: Set for "stun"! Fire!

Setting their blasters on "stun", the Mandalorians open fire on the two. Obi-Wan quickly pulls out his lightsaber, engaging the blade and using it to parry several stun-bolts, but in moments he and Anakin are both overwhelmed and taken down for the count.

Approaching the fallen partners, the Mandalorians stand over them, studying them from behind their face-concealing helmets.

MANDALORIAN #6: Inform the Deinonychus that we've caught another two bugs for the Force Hound's collection.

Assuming the Deinonychus is named after the dinosaur, you only spelled it right the last time. :)

Dagnabbit!

EXT. SPACE - TATOOINE

A shuttle leaves the Deinonychus on a course straight for the Nyax.

INT. NYAX/DOCKING BAY

His retinue of Mandalorian Knights at his side, the Force Hound watches as the shuttle slips into the landing bay, landing before him with the release of various pressurized gases. The hatch of the shuttlecraft pops open and lowers, and Obi-Wan and Anakin -- their arms bound behind them in heavy-duty energy shackles -- are led out with an escort of heavily-armed Mandalorian warriors surrounding them.

MANDALORIAN #7: (approaches the Force Hound) These are the Jedi our men captured on the planet, milord.

FORCE HOUND: (regards the two captives) Were any weapons found on them?

The Mandalorian reaches into his belt and pulls out Obi-Wan's lightsaber.

MANDALORIAN #7: Just this one lightsaber found on the older male.

FOUND HOUND: (takes the lightsaber) Good work, Lieutenant. (to Ben and Anakin) Welcome aboard the Nyax, gentlemen. This will be your home for the next week and a half, so I suggest you get used to the accommodations we've provided you. (to the Mandalorian lieutenant) Escort them to their cell.

Turning to his men, the Mandalorian lieutenant signals for them to start moving the captives along. Prodded at gunpoint to start moving, Obi-Wan and Nik begin following the Mandalorians to their waiting cell.

INT. NYAX/SIRI'S CELL

Siri sits against the wall directly facing the cell door, her arms propped up against her knees. Beyond sporting a large, reddish-purple bruise above her left temple, she is none the worse for wear.

The cell door suddenly unlocks and opens. Ben and Nik, freed from their bonds, are roughly pushed inside. Collapsing to the floor, they have no time to right themselves before the door is resealed.

OBI-WAN: (sits up and brushes himself off) Well, that was a pleasant experience. (to Anakin) Are you alright, Anakin?

ANAKIN: (sits up, rubbing his wrists) Yeah, I'm fine. (notices Siri) Looks like we've got a cellmate, Ben.

Siri, sitting there, merely stares at the two new arrivals without saying a word. Looking upon her for the first time, Ben freezes; underneath her disheveled appearance, Siri is an attractive woman, and Obi-Wan -- a ladies man at heart -- is immediately taken with the female Jedi.

OBI-WAN: (cocks an eyebrow) Well, hello.

SIRI: (nonchalant) Hello.

OBI-WAN: (offers his open hand, grinning broadly) I don't believe we've been acquainted.

SIRI: (ignores his hand) Siri Tachi, Jedi Knight of the Order of Coruscant.

OBI-WAN: Obi-Wan Kenobi, Jedi Knight-at-large.

SIRI: (cocks an eyebrow) You're a Jedi?

OBI-WAN: Not a Jedi of your calibre, I assure you, but a Jedi nevertheless.

SIRI: (nods toward Anakin) You look a little young to have an apprentice.

OBI-WAN: (glances at Anakin) Anakin isn't my apprentice.

SIRI: He's Force-sensitive, though.

OBI-WAN: (nods) Yes. I was planning on finding a master who'll take him on as an apprentice. (grins) You wouldn't be interested in the prospect, would you?

SIRI: Like you, I'm a little too young to train an apprentice. Besides, he's too old.

ANAKIN: (frowns) What do you mean, "too old"?

OBI-WAN: (growing serious) The Coruscanti Jedi aren't taken with training anyone who's over five years of age. It's usually forbidden, actually.

SIRI: (notices Ben's expression) You don't approve, of course.

OBI-WAN: I can't say I'm overly fond of separating children from their families and raising them in isolation to believe that relationships with non-Jedi are evil, no.

SIRI: (smirks) We are the largest denomination of Jedi in the Empire, so we must be doing something right.

ANAKIN: (rolls his eyes) Alright, okay. Siri, do you have any idea why the Mandalorians took us?

SIRI: These Mandalorians have been attacking worlds and ships throughout the Outer Rim for almost a year now, capturing and killing hundreds who've crossed their paths. (beat) The Council assigned me the task of investigating and determining their motivation.

OBI-WAN: Which is?

SIRI: We didn't know at first -- their pattern seemed random. I think I've figured it out, though. (beat) On the last world they attacked, I uncovered evidence that linked the Mandalorians to a Force-user -- probably a Dark Jedi -- who was teaching some of their sensitives how to use the Force.

OBI-WAN: Our friend in the aquamarine robes.

SIRI: (cont'd) I didn't think it had any real bearing on the case, though -- fallen Jedi often end up allying themselves with rogues and criminals. But the pattern is so clear now.

OBI-WAN: (frowns) I don't follow you.

SIRI: I put the final piece in the puzzle when you two arrived. Do you understand?

ANAKIN: You're being as clear as the sweat off a dewback.

SIRI: (shakes her head) We're all Force-sensitive, each of us!

OBI-WAN: (realization dawning in his eyes) You think the Mandalorians are ...

SIRI: They're rounding us up -- Jedi and non-Jedi, trained and untrained -- and taking us to some boot camp Force knows where to serve as slave soldiers within their ranks. (beat) They're looking for recruits who can wield the Force, and they're not asking nicely.

INT. DANIA VII - BUNKER 13/ZULL'S QUARTERS/BEDROOM - DAY

Zull lies asleep upon her small bed within her small, spartan quarters, her face peaceful in sleep. Though her long hair has been shorn down to a unisexual bob -- and her body lies adorned in plain, unflattering undergarments -- she remains preternaturally beautiful.

The room's lights suddenly flare to life, casting bright illumination down on her face. Her peaceful expression disappearing beneath a frown of interrupted sleep, Zull opens her eyes. Silhouetted against the open door of the bedroom is a Mandalorian warrior.

MANDALORIAN #8: It's time to report for training. Wake up and get yourself ready.

ZULL: (in heavily accented, broken Basic) I hear. You go.

Obeying, the Mandalorian leaves the doorframe. Zull, groaning with weariness, pushes herself up into a sitting position on her bed.

INT. BUNKER 13/ZULL'S QUARTERS/REFRESHER - DAY

Opening the door to her quarters' small refresher, Zull steps inside and walks up to the sink. As she turns the faucet on, she looks into the mirror before her. Looking into the reflection she becomes like a statue, entranced by her own mirrored image.

FLASH TO

An image of a human embryo floating within its mother's womb.

FLASH TO

Zull as she recoils from the mirror, unconsciously cracking it with the Force as she does so, her eyes stretched open wide.

Horrified, the disgraced Meketrex high priestess looks down at her womb, her hands beginning to tremble as an unwelcome truth reveals itself to her.

INT. NYAX/OBI-WAN, ANAKIN, & SIRI'S CELL

Sitting within their collective cell, Anakin looks upon the two Jedi, both in meditative trances. Bored out of his mind, he picks up a small pebble and flicks it at Ben, hitting him in the forehead and rousing him from his meditation.

OBI-WAN: Ow! (beat) Anakin, I was meditating!

Feeling her peer's pain through the Force, Siri's meditation is broken and she, too, comes up from her trance.

ANAKIN: (sighs) That's all fine and dandy like Mos Espan candy for you -- you get to meditate yourself out of this boring reality we're stuck in. Meanwhile, I'm stuck having to face it hour after torturously boring hour.

OBI-WAN: (sarcastic) It's not my fault the Mandalorians didn't provide us with some holodramas to watch.

SIRI: (sighs) Just teach him some meditation techniques, Kenobi.

OBI-WAN: (turns to Siri) I already told you I am not his teacher.

SIRI: (annoyed) So what? If you can't so much as teach a kid how to meditate, then you shouldn't even be a knight.

OBI-WAN: What do you care? You don't believe in teaching apprentices who are "too old", anyway.

SIRI: I care because I'm sick of listening to his complaining day in and day out! Maybe if you taught him how to meditate, I could get some of my own done!

OBI-WAN: Then you teach him!

SIRI: (smirks) He's too old, remember?

OBI-WAN: (fumes) You aggravating --

The Jedi knight cuts himself off before he can complete the curse and turns his back to Siri, deciding to ignore her.

ANAKIN: (angry) What's your problem, anyway?

OBI-WAN: My problem?

ANAKIN: Yeah, your problem. First you tell me to forget about the Force, and now you won't even show me how to do something as small as voyaging to Cloud #9. I'm getting fed up with it, Ben, and I want to know what the hell your deal is!

OBI-WAN: I don't want to talk about it.

ANAKIN: I frankly don't give a damn if you do or don't! I deserve a goddamn answer!

A moment of silence passes between them.

OBI-WAN: (sighs) You're right, Anakin, you're right. (beat) It's hard for me, though. It's still so fresh in my mind.

ANAKIN: (his expression softening) What is it?

OBI-WAN: Before I was knighted, I met and befriended a Jedi master named Jard Doku.

SIRI: (scoffs) Jard Doku? You're friends Master Jard Doku?! (laughs scornfully)

OBI-WAN: (ignores Siri) He had an apprentice named Qui-Gon Jinn, who was only a few years younger than I was. (beat) We became very close friends, he and I -- almost brothers. (beat) While on a mission to break up a Black Sun spice operation on Orbos IX, Doku was badly injured, leaving him unable to continue with Qui-Gon's training. As I had been knighted by this time and was no longer with Master Yoda, it was decided that Qui-Gon would be placed under my care until Master Doku fully recuperated. It wasn't a master-apprentice arrangement, per se -- more like a relationship between a counselor and a student.

ANAKIN: Something happened to him while he was with you.

OBI-WAN: A few months ago, the Federation Neimoidia invaded the world of Nabu and began killing off the planet's ruling family. As I was assigned to the team sent in to rescue the heirs apparent, Qui-Gon came along with me. (beat) While on Nabu, he and I encountered a dark warrior who engaged us in a lightsaber duel.

SIRI: This dark warrior ...?

OBI-WAN: We never uncovered his identity. He could have been an underling of the Neimoidians, perhaps even their employer -- it doesn't really matter. (beat) During the fight, we got separated, leaving Qui-Gon to face the darksider alone. (beat) In the end, Qui-Gon couldn't stand up to him and he died. (beat) Now you know why I haven't been eagre to share my knowledge of the Force with you, Anakin.

ANAKIN: You're afraid what happened to Qui-Gon could happen to me.

OBI-WAN: (crying) I played at being teacher once and failed. I won't do it again -- never again.

INT. NYAX/FORCE HOUND'S MEDITATION CHAMBER

Standing within his meditation circle, the Force Hound -- his body completely naked and shrouded in shadow -- moves to each tall candlestick surrounding him, passing his left hand over each of them and igniting white-hot flames through the Force in turn.

Once the circle of flames is complete, the Mandalorian sits down in the centre of it, crossing his legs as he does so. Bracing his arms against his crossed legs, he bows his head and begins his meditation.

Nothing happens at first, but gradually the glow of the white flames grows brighter and brighter. Soon, it glows so bright that a fog of pure white light fills the circle, casting almost everything beyond it into complete pitch black darkness; only the artificial stained glass window, lit with a myriad of colours, hovers alone in the darkness before the circle.

Lifting his head back, the fog of white surrounding him coalesces, focusing into a tight beam of almost-solid white light. Beyond the circle, the stained glass window begins to glow brighter until it becomes a miniature, multicoloured sun. As the Force Hound draws in a huge breath, a beam of varicoloured light fires down from the window and strikes the column of white light, passing through and piercing the Mandalorian.

The Mandalorian's closed eyes fly open, and his body begins to radiate with yellow brillance, dissolving into multicoloured light. Transforming into an amorphous mass of multicoloured energy, the Force Hound begins to ascend up the beam of white light, streams of rainbow light rising along with him.

EXT. SPACE

The coloured mass of energy that was the Force Hound finds itself flying through the depths of space, streams of varicoloured light passing beside and beyond it. Passing through the universe at speeds faster than light, the stars move past CMOE like blazing white fireflies. As it moves through the universe, Cmoe finds itself accerating to greater-and-greater speeds; soon the stars become long strings of white light, the rainbow-coloured streams like rods of solid light.

Eventually, Cmoe decelerates, and the starlines and rainbow beams fade away as it phases out of the physical universe.

EXT. TARTARUS

Cmoe enters a dark universe where the blacker-than-black sky is criss-crossed with thin vein-like lines of blood-red light. Under this abysmal sky lies a surface like partially-solidified magma, black-and-red.

Though desolate, the surface of this world is not empty; rising up like misshapen trees, wailing and gnashing their mouthparts, are the conjoined forms of countless immortal souls damned to eternal torment in this place. All noticing Cmoe passing over them, they reach out to it, grasping, all to no avail.

Passing over this nightmarish landscape, Cmoe fades out of this existence.

EXT. GEHENNA

Cmoe emerges into a world made up of shards of stone which rise up like billions of long, jagged teeth towards a dark purple-black sky.

Atop each of the stone teeth, amassed like ants on food at a picnic, are millions upon millions of black, vine-shaped creatures. Unable to all fit together on the shards of stone, many lose their hold and plummet to the surface below, where they are chewed to pieces against the wickedly sharp rock surface.

Passing through this universe, Cmoe fades away.

EXT. SHEOL

Cmoe now finds itself in a windblown universe where the sky is completely dark. The surface below is covered in trillions of crumbling bones, the only inhabitants a few translucent black shades which barely move over the face of their world.

Flying over the shades of Sheol, Cmoe disappears.

EXT. CHAOS

Emerging, Cmoe finds itself in a cosmos that is empty and dark save for an eerie, swirling green vortex which sits at its heart. As Cmoe moves toward the green vortex, the sound of atonal flute playing can be heard.

Passing into the immense green vortex, Cmoe is sucked down into it.

INT. VORTEX

As Cmoe speeds down along the swirling, liquid green sides of the vortex, the blasphemous chantings of an unseen chorus can be heard.

UNSEEN CHORUS: (O.C.) Yog-Sothoth fhtagn. Azathoth fhtagn. Yaldabaoth fhtagn ...

EXT. VOID

Cmoe emerges from the vortex into a deep, dark void. In the centre of this void lies the DEMIURGE -- an amorphous blob made up of many conjoined, inverted suns.

As Cmoe moves toward the Demiurge, the Nuclear Chaos throws out tendrils of coloured light, trying to ensnare and smother the smaller entity. Cmoe flies through these tendrils effortlessly, cutting them asunder like a hot knife through butter. Uttering a galaxy-shattering bellow, the Lurker at the Threshold throws out more-and-more tendrils to capture the ball of glowing radiance.

The increasing number of tendrils prove to be powerless against Cmoe, and the sphere of shimmering radiance speeds along its course, transforming into a razor-edged, multi-dimensional star as it reaches the Blind Idiot God.

Like an arrow of radiance, Cmoe collides with the All-in-One, piercing through to Its all-consuming heart. Releasing a death cry that could shatter the multiverse itself, the Demiurge dies and explodes.

The resulting pure-white conflagration quickly spreads throughout the black void, overtaking and consuming it completely, leaving a solid gray blankness behind in its wake. Within the centre of this virgin blankness floats the infinitesimal form of a human male infant, his feet and hands drawn into his chest and his eyes tightly closed.

As the infant begins to grow -- rapidly aging into a toddler, a prepubescent, an adolescent, and finally into an adult -- the grayness fades away, replaced with the familiar form of the physical universe, its infinite black sky filled with infinite white stars.

FLASH TO

The Force Hound sitting naked, cross-legged, within the centre of his meditation chamber. The flames of the candlesticks surrounding him have gone out, and he is awake, his eyes open, his meditation at an end.

EXT. DANIA VII - TRAINING ARENA - DAY

The training arena lies at the heart of an enormous amphitheatre, wide-open to the deep emerald sky of the planet Dania VII. The base of the amphitheatre serves as the main training centre for the recruits, while the outlying rings have been converted into various obstacle courses, each with varying levels of difficulty. Standing at regular intervals along the perimetre of the outermost ring of the amphitheatre are several armed Death Watchmen, each on alert for any captive lucky enough to get through the obstacle courses and make a break for freedom.

Entering the centre of the amphitheatre through a tunnel coming up from underground, Zull steps out into the intense light from Dania VII's three primary-coloured suns. Grimacing, she averts her gaze, shielding her eyes with her hand and focusing her vision on the ground at the centre of the arena, and walks forward, the two dozen other recruits of her regiment following in after her. Waiting for them is a Mandalorian drill sergeant.

DRILL SERGEANT: Hurry up and take your places.

The slave recruits file in up to the Mandalorian, organizing into two neat columns of a dozen each before him. As each regiment is made up of recruits sorted by their proficiency in the Force, all the members of this regiment stand on roughly equal footing with one another.

DRILL SERGEANT: You'll be practicing swordplay techniques today. (pulls a pair of swords out from scabbards strapped to his sides) Each of you pair up with a partner.

Obeying the Mandalorian, each member of the regiment pairs up with a partner. Zull finds herself paired up with Tilos Metiya, a ruggedly handsome human male with dark blond hair and steel gray eyes.

TILOS METIYA: (winks at Zull) I promise not to rough you up too much, Zullie.

Zull refuses to respond, her face grave.

One-by-one, each pair moves to the centre of the arena, taking turns sparring while the Mandalorian stands nearby, giving them advice each and every time they slip up.

Eventually, it is Zull and Metiya's turn.

TILOS METIYA: (slaps Zull on the rear) We're up, Zullie.

Her eyes flaring with sudden anger, Zull rears back her hand and throws it out, her fingers twisted into claws, eagre to slice ribbons of flesh off his face. Effortlessly, the human male catches her wrist before she can make contact.

TILOS METIYA: (grins) Save it for the show, Zullie baby, okay?

Violently wrenching her arm out of his grip, Zull speed-walks up to the Mandalorian sergeant, taking one of the two proffered swords eagrely. Metiya, for his part, nonchalantly walks up to the sergeant, absentmindedly accepting the remaining sword.

DRILL SERGEANT: Beg --

Before the Mandalorian sergeant can finish his proclamation, Zull attacks, bringing her sword down on Metiya with a ferocious strike. Barely able to register the attack in time, the human sloppily blocks the blow and is thrown off-kilter. Unwilling to give Metiya any opportunity to catch his bearings, Zull dives in for another attack.

Empowered by her rage and the dark side of the Force, Zull delivers unrelenting blow upon unrelenting blow Metiya's way, giving him no opportunity to go on the offensive, forcing him to use his sword merely as a shield. The human feebly tries to use the Force to repel her attacks, but she shrugs the counterattacks off, using the Force herself to deliver blow upon bone-splintering blow to his face, torso, and groin.

Eventually, Zull brings the outmatched battle to an end. Slashing through the tendons of his sword hand, she disarms him, and with a Force-assisted kick, she drives him off his feet to his back on the ground.

DRILL SERGEANT: (walks up to Zull) Flawless victory, Zull. Next time, however --

The fallen priestess gives the sergeant no time to finish his speech. Teeth bared like a beast driven to an unquenchable rage, she rears back her sword and, with a savage howl, attacks Tilos Metiya, who lies defenseless on the ground trying to staunch the flow of blood running out from his slashed wrist.

Reaching Metiya, the near-human woman brings her sword down on him, cleaving him in twain. Her rage unsatisfied, she pulls the sword out and swings down again.

Each time she chops into the dead flesh of her slain opponent, she pulls the sword out to deliver another blow, again-and-again-and-again until Mandalorian guards are finally sent to restrain and pull her away.

The script is at least PG-13, that's for sure.

Like Ric_2 said, I'm trying to go no higher than PG-13 with my script. In my mind's eye, most of the heavy violence -- like in that last scene -- is implied rather than shown (like in Psycho, for example). 

Going back over the early parts of the script, I realized that too little about Zull's character is revealed during the time between her abduction and "The Infamous Scene" to make her following descent into darkness all that profound, so I decided to add a new scene which reveals more backstory on her people and the spiritual beliefs she held to prior to her fall.

The new scene can be found between the scene where Ben meets Beru and the scene where Ben has his first argument with Owen.

http://originaltrilogy.com/forum/topic.cfm/Star-Wars-The-New-Dawn-The-First-Episode-in-DuracellEnergizers-New-PT-Rewrite/post/691422/#TopicPost691422

INT. NYAX/OBI-WAN, ANAKIN, & SIRI'S CELL

Ben, Nik, and Siri all lie prone within their cell, fast asleep.

ZOOM IN

On Obi-Wan's sleeping face.

FADE TO

Obi-Wan standing out in the middle of the Tatooine desert, completely naked save for a simple loincloth hanging down over his privates. Though the suns are low in a dark sky -- indicating that the time of day is twilight -- the landscape is brightly lit as if under a midday's full suns.

Standing before Obi-Wan -- towering over a large, elaborate altar wrought out of platinum and gold -- is a tall, gnarled tree, it's branches ablaze with green flame.

OBI-WAN: (gets down on his knees) What is thy bidding, my master?

BLAZING TREE: If train you not the boy, another will he turn to for guidance.

As a shadow falls over him from behind, Ben turns to look over his shoulder. Standing there, clad in the armour and robes of a Mandalorian Knight, is Anakin Skywalker. His teeth needle-sharp points in his mouth, his eyes a pair of burning red coals in his face, he carries a bloodstained sword of Mandalorian iron aloft in his hands.

Before Ben can act, Anakin lops his head off with a single stroke.

CUT TO

Obi-Wan starting awake in the cell as the cell door is unlocked and opened, allowing a pair of Mandalorian Knights with four heavily-armed 'droid escorts to step inside. While Siri immediately awakens as these sinister figures enter the cell, Nik remains sound asleep.

MANDALORIAN #9: (to Mandalorian #10) Grab the boy.

The Mandalorian obeys his comrade and grabs hold of Anakin, violently pulling him awake.

ANAKIN: Hey! What --?

Leaping to his feet, Ben shoves the Mandalorian back away from the boy and into his comrade, toppling them both over. With Siri awake and by his side, they turn in unison toward the four 'droids.

Lunging at one of the 'droids, Ben wrenches the large blaster out of its hands and, taking aim, fires. The resulting bolt strikes the 'droid, but to absolutely no effect. Looking down at the weapon, Ben sees that it is set on "stun" with no visible dials or switches available to change it to a heavier setting.

Caught off guard, the Jedi knights fail to get out of the way as the other 'droids level their blasters and fire, bringing them both down with incredibly potent stun-bolts.

Regaining their wits, the two Mandalorians climb back to their feet. Walking over to Obi-Wan, Mandalorian #9 kicks the unconscious Jedi once in the gut.

MANDALORIAN #9: Forget the kid. Let's bring this trash to the doctor instead.

INT. NYAX/TORTURE CHAMBER

The two Mandalorian Knights drag Obi-Wan into the torture chamber, the four armed 'droids following behind, and carry the unconscious Jedi over to the dungeon master, who is currently engaged in injecting a series of nasty-looking chemicals into an emaciated Hutt strapped down onto a table.

DUNGEON MASTER: (scolding) You knocked him out.

MANDALORIAN #10: You expected him to come with open arms and kisses?

DUNGEON MASTER: (sighs) My stimulants don't come cheap, you know. In the future, try to bring captives to me in a conscious state, will you please?

Reaching over to his tray full of hypo-syringes containing various different coloured fluids, the dungeon master picks up one containing a dirty yellow liquid. Grabbing hold of Ben's left arm, he pulls it out and jabs the needle into the Jedi's wrist, injecting the entire contents of the syringe into his bloodstream.

In moments Obi-Wan comes fully awake, screaming in agony.

DUNGEON MASTER: Welcome back to the land of the living, Master Jedi. Don't worry about the pain -- it'll pass momentarily.

After about a minute, the burning pain passing through Obi-Wan's veins begins to subside, and the screaming comes to an end.

DUNGEON MASTER: (ecstatic) It has been some time since I've worked on a bonafide Jedi.

Reaching back to his tray, the Mandalorian dungeon master picks up a hypo filled with a blue-black liquid.

DUNGEON MASTER: (cont'd) This'll be such a pleasure!

Grabbing Ben by the chin with his free hand, the dungeon master then brings forth the syringe with the other. Planting the tip of the needle directly against Obi-Wan's forehead, he pushes it through his skull and into his brain, injecting the chemicals directly into his cerebral cortex.

As the Jedi's eyes roll up into his head and his muscles begin to involuntarily shudder, the Mandalorians holding him drag him over to the coffin-like encasement. Opening it, they throw Ben inside and then seal it shut, closing him up in complete darkness and silence.

EXT. DARK WORLD (DREAMSCAPE)

Blue-white fog begins to billow up within a completely empty black void, and Obi-Wan comes running through it in slow motion. Terror etched on his face, he keeps turning to look behind him at something chasing after him.

Without warning, the ground goes out from under him, and the Jedi falls through the thick fog, disappearing from sight.

INT. TUNNEL WORLD (DREAMSCAPE)

Obi-Wan falls through a carved rock tunnel leading into the earth deep below. As he plummets, several nightmarish creatures -- flickering balls of sparking light, skeletal horses, skulltulas, and batwinged skulls -- come flying out of the darkness to assail him, swirling about him, wailing and cackling.

CUT TO

Bright electricity coursing over a blue background.

CUT TO

An inverted-colour shot of Obi-Wan reaching the end of the tunnel, breaking through a thick cover of cobweb and falling past it.

EXT. SEA WORLD - TWILIGHT (DREAMSCAPE)

Ben breaks through the dark water of an endless sea, gasping and thrashing about as he struggles to draw air into his lungs. Once he has caught his breath, he begins to swim through the blue-black water, soon disappearing into the horizon in the distance.

Suddenly, the seascape shatters like a pane of glass, dropping away in shards to reveal a close-up shot of a blazing orange sun beyond.

FADE TO

Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon Jinn standing within the labyrinthine interior of the ruins of an ancient fortress. Clad in the armour of the ancient Jedi Knights, they wield swords of emerald and azure fire, respectively.

Standing before them, clad in a red-and-black suit of biomechanical armour, is the dark warrior, a wicked crown of long horns encircling his head and a quarterstaff of ruby-red fire blazing in his hands.

Bringing their weapons to bear, the two Jedi attack the dark warrior, meeting his flaming red staff with their swords of blue and green fire. As one, the three combatants make their way up the labyrinthine interior of the ruins, moving with the grace of dancers in a cosmic ballet as lightning and thunder strikes through the open holes of the ruins, lighting the interior up with intense sound and dazzling illumination.

As the three warriors near the apex of the ruined fortress, the ground around Obi-Wan's feet suddenly turns to liquid tar, and he finds himself unable to move forward with any haste. As he struggles to move through the syrupy black mess, Qui-Gon and the dark warrior move on ahead in their duel, leaving him behind.

With immense effort, Ben manages to walk through the tar and climb the rest of the distance to the top of the ruins. As he arrives, he finds himself too late to offer the apprentice any aid; having gained the advantage in their duel, the dark warrior runs Qui-Gon through with his quarterstaff, killing him.

FLASH TO

Obi-Wan and the dark warrior suddenly engaged in a fierce duel, sword of green flame clashing against staff of red fire. They are like two perfect mirror images of one another, two different sides of one whole coin.

The duel reaches its crescendo, and Ben finds himself faltering against the zabrak warrior. As he loses his footing, the darksider takes his advantage and knocks the Jedi off the top of the ruins. With his reflexes at his command, Ben saves himself by grabbing hold of a stone outcropping, but he loses his flaming sword in the process; looking down, he watches as the vibrant emerald blade disappears in the black void below.

Standing over the Jedi, the dark warrior throws his hands up into the air, releasing a roar of final victory. Looking down at the helpless Jedi, he grins -- bearing needle-like teeth -- then rears his ruby quarterstaff back for the killing blow.

Without a moment's hesitation, Obi-Wan flies up through the air, passing over the dark side warrior, and lands behind him. Bringing forth his hand, Qui-Gon's sword of azure fire materializes in his hand. As the dark warrior turns to face him, Obi-Wan lashes out with the blue sword, slashing the zabrak through the shoulder.

His face growing slack, the dark warrior's eyes glaze over and he falls over the side. Looking over, Obi-Wan watches as red lightning courses out of the zabrak's wound as he plummets into the darkness.

CUT TO

Inverted-colour electricity coursing over an orange background.

CUT TO

Obi-Wan running his hands down his face as tears of blood stream down his cheeks from bloodshot eyes.

CUT TO

The decayed head of a GREEN, GNOME-LIKE CREATURE WITH LONG, TAPERED EARS rising up out of a black void. As it reaches the camera, its mouth opens, releasing a hideous shriek as it swallows everything up.

FLASH TO

Ben lying outside the open coffin-like encasement in the Nyax's torture chamber. Traumatized by the hallucinatory experience he just witnessed, he can do nothing but tremble uncontrollably, his eyes frozen open in stark terror.

INT. NYAX/CORRIDOR

The Force Hound walks along the corridor at a quick pace, his aquamarine robes billowing up behind him as he hurries toward his destination.

INT. NYAX/SICK BAY

Within the sick bay, Ben lies prone in a hospital bed surrounded by a pair of medical droids who are busy examining his readings. Standing off to the side, looking out of place in this clean, white environment, is the Mandalorian dungeon master.

The door leading into the sick bay slides open, and the Force Hound steps inside. As the Force-using Mandalorian approaches Ben's bed, the dungeon master turns to face his lord.

FORCE HOUND: What happened to him?

DUNGEON MASTER: He had such a bad reaction to the visions he experienced in the coffin that he fell into a catatonic shock. (beat) I'm amazed this happened, to be honest -- I've seen latents and novices who've come out in better condition.

FORCE HOUND: (angry) Amazed?

Reaching out with the Force, the Force Hound begins to strangle the dungeon master. Choking, the professional torturer falls to his knees, clawing at his throat.

FORCE HOUND: (vehement) Your duty on this ship is to break the new recruits, not to carry out another one of those twisted experiments you and the rest of your sick kind performed during the First Clone War.

The dungeon master collapses on his hands, wheezing horribly.

FORCE HOUND: (cont'd) If this Jedi suffers any permanent damage from what you've done to him, I swear you'll suffer a fate worse than those you've inflicted upon your many subjects, my dear Doctor.

The Force Hound releases his grip, and the dungeon master collapses to the deck completely. Sucking in big, heavy gulps of air, he begins coughing violently.

FORCE HOUND: Get out of my sight.

Continuing to cough, the dungeon master climbs to his feet and hurries out of the sick bay with all the grace of a dog who has been kicked multiple times in the ribs.

Once the dungeon master is gone, the Force Hound turns toward Obi-Wan laid out on the bed; the Jedi's body twitches fitfully, his eyes staring unblinkingly at nothing.

FORCE HOUND: (to the medical droids) Leave us.

With unquestioning obedience, the two droids leave the bed of the young Jedi knight to attend to duties elsewhere. Stepping up to the prone form of Obi-Wan Kenobi, the Force Hound reaches out to him, placing his hand on the young man's forehead.

INT. SWAMP PLANET - CAVE (DREAMSCAPE)

A six-year-old Obi-Wan sits within the dark depths of the cave, huddled up against a vine-covered stone wall with his knees drawn up into his chest; cold and wet, he flinches with absolute terror at every nightmarish sound or shape that moves throughout the dark cave.

Suddenly, a yellow glow comes to life behind the young boy. Spinning around, he watches as a silhouetted humanoid figure steps out of the light towards him.

SIX-YEAR-OLD OBI-WAN: Leave me alone!

SILHOUETTED FIGURE: It's alright. I'm not here to hurt you.

SIX-YEAR-OLD OBI-WAN: You're lying! You're another monster! Another part of the darkness! Go away!

SILHOUETTED FIGURE: I'm not part of the darkness, child.

With a bright flash of light, the figure is illuminated by an inner glow, revealing his features. The figure is a tall human male adorned in the charcoal-and-black garb of a Coruscanti Jedi knight; his eyes and smile are both warm and friendly.

SIX-YEAR-OLD OBI-WAN: Who are you?

SILHOUETTED FIGURE: (crouches down beside Ben) My name is Pre. I'm a Jedi Knight. I'm here to take you out of this place.

SIX-YEAR-OLD OBI-WAN: (crying) You can't. It's too strong.

PRE (SILHOUETTED FIGURE): What's too strong?

SIX-YEAR-OLD OBI-WAN: The darkness. It destroys everything ... everything.

PRE: (places a hand on Obi-Wan's shoulder) No, it doesn't. Not if you don't let it.

SIX-YEAR-OLD OBI-WAN: It's taken friends and family from me. How can I believe you?

PRE: Have faith in me, Ben Kenobi.

Standing up, the Jedi knight simply named Pre offers the young Ben his open hand.

PRE: (cont'd) Please -- trust me.

Wiping tears from his eyes, Ben tentatively takes Pre's proffered hand. Gently pulling the boy to his feet, the Jedi draws his lightsaber out with his other hand. Engaging the exotic white blade with its pure black core, the Jedi holds it up before him.

SIX-YEAR-OLD OBI-WAN: I'm afraid.

PRE: There's nothing out there but shadows, Ben. We can beat them back together.

With his white-black lightsaber held out before him like a torch against the darkness, the Jedi leads the young boy out of the pitch black cave into the bright yellow glow. Together, they disappear into it.

INT. NYAX/SICK BAY

Obi-Wan bolts upright in his bed, breathing heavily. Turning around, he finds himself looking into the visor of the Force Hound's polished helmet.

OBI-WAN: You!

FORCE HOUND: Welcome back, Obi-Wan Kenobi.

OBI-WAN: You pulled me out -- why?

FORCE HOUND: Because you don't deserve to be trapped in the darkness of your own mind.

Just as Ben prepares to make a move against the Force Hound, the Mandalorian quickly brings out a filled hypo-syringe. Burying it in Obi-Wan's neck, he injects the full contents into his bloodstream. Wracked with sudden numbness, the Jedi begins to sink back into his bed.

FORCE HOUND: Don't worry, Jedi. This one is a simple sedative, nothing more.

OBI-WAN: Who ... are you?

FORCE HOUND: My compatriots know me as the Force Hound. (removes his helmet) But you may know me by the name my parents gave me.

His helmet removed, we can see that the Force Hound is none other than Pre, the Jedi knight who escorted Ben out of his black dreamscape. He is older than his dream counterpart, though, his face gaunt and tired; he is a man who has witnessed too much evil in his lifetime and, as a result, has come out emotionally and spiritually scarred.

FORCE HOUND: (cont'd) My name is Pre Vizsla.

Losing all his consciousness, Ben's eyes close. Pre Vizsla, his sad face pale under the bright light of the sick bay, turns to leave the Jedi to his slumber.

INT. NYAX/OBI-WAN, ANAKIN, & SIRI'S CELL

Anakin sits cross-legged on the deck, shirtless, looking down upon Siri, who lies beside him unconscious with his balled-up shirt placed under her head to serve as a pillow.

Groaning, the female Jedi knight slows regains consciousness, sitting up with considerable effort.

SIRI: (touches the side of her head with a grimace) What happened? (looks about the cell) Where's Kenobi?

ANAKIN: You were both stun-blasted and Ben was taken away. (beat) That was four hours ago, I think.

SIRI: (grave) For suborning, no doubt.

The cell door is suddenly unlocked and opened, allowing the two Mandalorian Knights to haul the unconscious form of Obi-Wan inside. Once they have dropped him to the deck, Anakin scurries over to examine the Jedi.

ANAKIN: (angry) What have you done to him, you bastards?!

MANDALORIAN #10: He'll survive.

Without further ado, the Mandalorians leave. Once they are gone, Siri scurries over to Nik and Ben's side.

ANAKIN: Can you tell if he's okay?

SIRI: (places a hand on his cheek then forehead) He's suffered a severe shock, but he's recuperating fast. He should come to soon.

ANAKIN: We'll let him rest, then. (beat) Get my shirt.

Siri obeys and scurries over to grab the wadded-up shirt she'd been using as a pillow. Returning to Anakin's side, she places it under Ben's head.

ANAKIN: What did they do to him?

INT. NYAX/SPARRING CHAMBER

Fuelled by his anger and hate, a Bpfasshi Dark Jedi strikes out at the six Mandalorian Knights surrounding him with incredible ferocity, lunging and slashing at them with the buzzing chartreuse blade of his lightsaber. Though each of the Mandalorians are seasoned warriors, they have to struggle to maintain themselves against the Bpfasshi's violent defense.

One of the Knights dives forward, somersaulting across the deck to the Dark Jedi, bringing his Mandalorian iron sword up in a slash that will sever the Bpfasshi's legs at the knees. Anticipating the attack, the Dark Jedi leaps up into the air, then lands on the blade of the sword, pinning the weapon down. Before the Mandalorian can move away, the Dark Jedi decapitates him at the jaw with his lightsaber.

Taking advantage of the sudden disorientation of the Mandalorian Knights, the Dark Jedi leaps up into the air, somersaults over the Mandalorians, and lands outside of the circle they had formed around him. Lunging forward, he runs one of the Mandalorians through, killing him instantly. Pulling his weapon free, he turns to face the remaining four warriors as they rush at them.

Swinging wildly, he misses the first warrior, who manages to land a nasty blow to the bicep of his right arm. Grunting with pain, he manages to bring his lightsaber up in time to parry the blow of the second Knight. Throwing out his hand, he pushes the Knight back into the Mandalorian behind him, skewering him on his companion's sword; before he can free his sword from the form of his companion, the Dark Jedi cuts them both down. Breathing heavily, the Bpfasshi Dark Jedi turns to face the remaining two Mandalorian Knights.

The Mandalorians rush forward toward the Dark Jedi and as a team strike out, the one of the left aiming for the Bpfasshi's head with the one on the right aiming for the legs. Throwing himself backward, the Dark Jedi avoids losing his head, though he does receive a nasty slash through his left ankle.

Grunting with pain, the darksider sends his chartreuse lightsaber spinning across the floor towards the Mandalorian on his right. The Knight fails to avoid the spinning lightsaber in time and the energy blade cleaves through both her ankles, cutting her feet off and sending her crashing to the deck.

The Bpfasshi gets back on his feet, using his dark side-enhanced adrenaline to block the pain shooting up from his wounded ankle out, and retrieves both his lightsaber and one of the fallen Mandalorians' swords. Then, with yellow-green energy blade in one hand and physical blade of Mandalorian iron in the other, he pounces upon the last Mandalorian.

The remaining Mandalorian Knight defends herself well against the Dark Jedi's fierce attack, but in the end she falls to the darksider, losing both hands and the right side of her head to the combined blades of her adversary.

Exhausted, the Bpfasshi Dark Jedi deactivates his lightsaber and throws the sword of Mandalorian iron to the deck. Surveying the wounded and slain strewn about him, he runs the back of a hand across his sweaty brow.

BPFASSHI DARK JEDI: Mandalorian bastards, I've won! It's over!

A door to the chamber slides open and Pre Vizsla steps inside. As the Mandalorian approaches the Dark Jedi, the latter brings his lightsaber back up, reigniting the yellow-green blade.

BPFASSHI DARK JEDI: You're dead!

The Dark Jedi lunges forward, bringing his lightsaber down in a straight stroke toward the Mandalorian's head. Without the slightest effort, the Mandalorian seizes the darksider's wrist before the blade can connect and, with a twist, snaps the Dark Jedi's wrist, causing him to drop his lightsaber.

PRE VIZSLA (FORCE HOUND): Rage and hate are powerful emotions -- they fuel the Force and, in turn, fuel you.

Reaching out with the Force, Vizsla calls the Dark Jedi's fallen lightsaber to his free hand.

PRE VIZSLA: (cont'd) But the power they give you is fleeting. Once it's gone, you're left tired and weak, defenseless as a small child.

Throwing out his hand, he releases the Dark Jedi. As the Bpfasshi staggers back, the Mandalorian ignites the darksider's weapon and, with one clean stroke, beheads him.

PRE VIZSLA: (cont'd) It is a lesson your kind rarely come to learn.

Disengaging the Dark Jedi's weapon, he lowers it to his side, his eyes behind the all-concealing visor of his helmet focusing on the decapitated remains of the fallen Bpfasshi.

Just a heads up: the last entry in the script has been be heavily rewritten; the bit with Siri in the sparring chamber has been replaced with a somewhat similar scene dealing with a Dark Jedi captive in the sparring chamber instead.

INT. NYAX/OBI-WAN, ANAKIN, & SIRI'S CELL

Obi-Wan sits against the far wall of the cell away from Anakin and Siri, watching them as they sleep. A few days have passed since his experience in the torture chamber, and he is visibly worse for the wear.

With a yawn, Siri rises from her sleep. Sitting up, she notices Obi-Wan staring.

SIRI: Good morning, Obi-Wan.

OBI-WAN: Morning, Siri.

SIRI: (cocks an eyebrow) That's the most you've said in the past three days. I'm glad to see you coming around.

OBI-WAN: (absentminded) Coming around? I suppose I am.

With that, their brief conversation comes to an end; as Ben continues to stare at Anakin, Siri moves over to the corner of the room which serves as the cell's lavatory to relieve herself of last night's meagre meal.

Minutes pass, and finally Anakin awakens.

OBI-WAN: Anakin ...

ANAKIN: (looks up at Ben) Obi-Wan?

OBI-WAN: Come here.

Getting up, Nik walks over to Ben and crouches down beside the Jedi.

ANAKIN: What is it? Are you okay?

OBI-WAN: I'm alright, Anakin. Just listen to what I have to say.

ANAKIN: Okay. What is it you have to say?

OBI-WAN: You remember what I told you about the Force?

ANAKIN: Yeah. You said it's the "soul of the universe", that it binds everything in the universe together and gives those who can touch it amazing powers.

OBI-WAN: That wasn't the full story. (beat) My master taught me that the Force has two main sides -- a light side and a dark side. The light side is the positive side of the Force -- in harmony with love and life and peace. The dark side, on the other hand, is the negative side of the Force -- chaotic and in tune with fear, hatred, and death. (beat) My master also taught me that while the dark side is easier to follow than the light, it is not stronger.

ANAKIN: I'm following you.

OBI-WAN: After Qui-Gon died, I started to fear that Yoda might be wrong -- that the dark side actually is stronger than the light. (beat) I'm still afraid the dark side's stronger.

ANAKIN: There's an "and" or "but" somewhere in all this, I hope?

OBI-WAN: (cont'd) But I realized that I don't have to lie down and let the darkness roll over me. I can fight it -- even if I can't win, I can fight. (beat) I'm going to fight the dark side, Anakin, and I'm going to help you fight it, too.

ANAKIN: What do you mean?

OBI-WAN: Vizsla is going to do whatever it takes to twist you over to his way of thinking. I'm not going to let that happen. (beat) I'm going to use whatever remaining time we have on this ship together to prepare you for his assaults -- I'm going to teach you how to use the light side of the Force.

Another heads up: to give this story more of an original Star Wars vibe and bring it more in line with it being precursor to the OT, I've removed most depictions of the Jedi and other Force adepts using telekinesis; Pre Vizsla AKA the Force Hound is now the only character to display any overt telekinetic abilities.

INT. DANIA VII - DETENTION CENTRE - DAY

A thin man in light blue coveralls stands outside a sealed cell door, a tray of food in his hands. Crouching down, he sets the tray on the floor and reaches through an open slot set in the bottom of the door, pulling out another tray of food that has gone cold from neglect.

CELL BLOCK WORKER: (sighs) If you don't eat, you'll get sick. You know that, don'tcha?

When he receives no response from the prisoner inside, the worker sighs again with disappointment, then slides the new tray of food through the slot and into the cell. Standing up, he presses a button set into a remote strapped to his wrist, closing the slot, then takes hold of the handle of his hovercart of food trays and saunters off to attend to the other prisoners.

INT. DETENTION CENTRE/ZULL'S CELL - DAY

Zull sits alone in the far corner of the small, bare, dimly-lit windowless cell, her legs uncomfortably crossed, her arms lying limp at her sides. Though she is in a meditative trance, her black-rimmed, bloodshot eyes are wide open.

CUT TO

A shot of the embryo developing within her womb.

CUT TO

A close up shot of Zull's face.

ZULL: (subtitled) I don't want you, I don't want you. I hate you, I hate you inside me. Die, Gods damn you, just die!

CUT TO

The embryo stirring within her womb.

CUT TO

Zull as her face twists with rage.

ZULL: (screaming) (subtitled) I don't want you inside me! I don't want anything from that son of whore inside me! Get out of me! Get out! I'll cut you out of me! I'll cut you out! I'll kill you, you bastard, I'll kill you!

As tears begin to run from her eyes, she falls face-forward, pounding the floor of her cell with her fists.

ZULL: (subtitled) Why have the Gods done this to me? Why ...?

DUAL-TONED VOICE: (O.C.) (subtitled) It is not what the Gods have done to you, but what you have done to yourself.

Hearing the unearthly voice, Zull immediately looks up, towards the source. Across from her, on the other end of the cell, a dull orange glow appears and -- from that glow -- a black, humanoid silhouette fades into existence; the silhouette -- feminine, tall, and sporting a pair of large, curved horns -- is an intimidating sight to behold.

ZULL: (confused) (subtitled) Great Princess?

Before Zull looms the black, featureless shape of the GREAT PRINCESS, also known as the Princess of the Power of the Air, the spirit which serves as the primary intermediary between the Meketrex and their gods.

GREAT PRINCESS (DUAL-TONED VOICE): (subtitled) I am she, Zull Uquesne, daughter of Egon and Stantz.

ZULL: (subtitled) Great Princess, please -- deliver me from this! Save me!

GREAT PRINCESS: (subtitled) You had the means to deliver yourself, but chose not to. Why do you think I have come to do what you yourself did not?

ZULL: (subtitled) What do you mean?

GREAT PRINCESS: (subtitled) You looked into the myriad futures available to you, and out of all the possible universes you could have chosen to enter, you chose this one. (beat) Do not ask for deliverance from a destiny you chose to accept.

ZULL: (subtitled) But the other futures I saw were so uncertain -- many would have led to my death!

GREAT PRINCESS: (subtitled) So what if they had? You know more than any Meketrex alive that death is merely a transition, a means of escaping the prison of flesh so as to set upon the path to ascension. Would the fleeting pain, the passing fear, have been a greater burden to bear than what has transpired?

ZULL: (subtitled) I had a duty to the Meketrex, to the Sebouillia!

GREAT PRINCESS: (subtitled) You served the Gods faithfully, and as a reward, They offered you the chance to sit with Them under the All-Seeing Eye of the Almighty Father. (beat) Your only duty then was to yourself, and you betrayed yourself.

ZULL: (yelling) (subtitled) I betrayed no one! I was the one who was betrayed!

GREAT PRINCESS: (points down at Zull) (subtitled) By yourself! You betrayed yourself. You perverted the gift of the Breath of the Gods by using it to kill, and by doing so, you betrayed yourself!

ZULL: (screaming) (subtitled) I was violated, damn you! I was beaten, and I was defiled! I was treated like an animal -- I was made into an animal!

GREAT PRINCESS: (subtitled) And that gives you the right to murder an innocent soul?!

ZULL: (subtitled) That Mandalorian bastard was no innocent!

GREAT PRINCESS: (subtitled) I do not speak of Dus Ubbs, Zull Uquesne, but of Tilos Metiya.

ZULL: Tilos ...?

GREAT PRINCESS: (subtitled) Metiya's only sin was to bear a scant resemblance to your defiler, and for that you slew him -- slew him like an animal -- with no feelings of guilt, of remorse -- just to satisfy your own wrath. (beat) You have betrayed all that you were taught and all that you were -- you are the basest of heretics.

ZULL: (voice growing small) (subtitled) Please, no ...

GREAT PRINCESS: (subtitled) Seek me out no more, Zull Uquesne, daughter of Egon and Stantz, for you have been written out of the Book of Heaven and are thus shut out and cut off. You have forsaken the Truth of the Gods, and for that, you will suffer in the Hell you have created for yourself alone.

With those final words, the Great Princess begins to fade.

ZULL: (reaches out toward her) (subtitled) No! Don't leave me!

The shadowy apparition disappears and the dull orange glow that accompanied it goes out, returning the interior of the cell to its previous dim gray state.

ZULL: (crying) (subtitled) Don't leave me ...

The only response Zull receives is dead silence.

EXT. OGANA MAJOR - CLIFF - DAY (DREAMSCAPE)

On the world of Ogana Major, Obi-Wan and Anakin stand together at the edge of a cliff covered in blue-green grass, the breathtaking view of a roiling sea beyond them; they watch, unblinking, as the midnight blue waves flow and overtake one another under a sky that is half blue with white sun and half silver with rain cloud.

ANAKIN: Where are we?

OBI-WAN: Ogana Major.

ANAKIN: (smiles) This is the rain planet you told me about.

OBI-WAN: I thought you'd like it. (beat) This is only the dry season, though -- when the clouds are at their peak, the rain's so thick you can't see a metre in front of you.

ANAKIN: God, it looks so real! (beat) But it's all in my head, right? You didn't teleport us here through the Force or anything like that.

OBI-WAN: (laughs) It's all in my head, actually. I'm simply sharing it with you through a rapport in the Force.

ANAKIN: Can you do this with anyone?

OBI-WAN: Establishing a rapport is easy if both parties are receptive to one another. If I were to try it with someone who was not receptive -- or not willing -- it would be far harder.

A moment of silence passes between the master and his apprentice.

ANAKIN: (strokes his chin) So, why did you take me -- us -- here, again?

OBI-WAN: I didn't create this dreamscape from my imagination. This is a memory from when I was on this planet -- a moment suspended in time. I recalled the emotions I felt on that day, and I used them to create this illusion.

ANAKIN: I pretty much had that figured out. What's the point you're driving at?

OBI-WAN: Your emotions -- love, excitement, curiosity, amusement, and so on -- are the keys to the Force. By drawing on them, you free yourself and gain the ability to consciously tap into the Force and to call on its power. Without your feelings, you would be like a blind man groping about the darkness in search of a light.

ANAKIN: So without emotion, you can't feel the Force or use it? You can't link up with anyone's mind or create dream worlds within in?

OBI-WAN: Exactly.

ANAKIN: Why?

OBI-WAN: Because the Force is not of the rational world. It cannot be studied, analysed, or quantified. It is a primal energy, a thing of intuition and of the heart, alien to conventional logic and the mind.

ANAKIN: So, feelings are the key. Is that all feelings or only specific ones?

OBI-WAN: Any emotion fuels the Force, but that doesn't mean all should be called upon.

ANAKIN: You mean negative emotions, right? The ones that lead to the dark side?

OBI-WAN: Unbridled anger, hatred, lust, fear -- they are all of the dark side and should never be called upon.

ANAKIN: But it's only natural to feel anger, hatred, lust, and fear. It's a part of what makes us who we are.

OBI-WAN: The key word is unbridled. There is nothing wrong with getting upset with a person who has wronged you or finding yourself aroused by a beautiful woman -- it's only when you give yourself wholly to those emotions, when you cast aside all discretion and restraint for them, that they become of the dark side.

ANAKIN: How do I know when to restrain them? How do I learn how to control them?

OBI-WAN: You know how to use your common sense, don't you? You know when not to eat or drink too much. The same applies to your feelings; know when enough is enough, and stop feeding.

A moment of silence passes between the master and the apprentice.

OBI-WAN: Tell me, Anakin, what do you feel right now? What emotions are stirring within you?

ANAKIN: A lot -- too many.

OBI-WAN: Tell me.

ANAKIN: Anxiety ... confusion ... anger ... trepidation ... longing ... love ... elation ... excitement!

OBI-WAN: Catch hold of all those feelings, Anakin. Reach out with them, reach out to the Force.

ANAKIN: But you told me not to give in to the bad ones.

OBI-WAN: Let them flow out of you, not through you. (beat) Let your emotions flow out of you and into the Force. Let the Force recognize them and you. Let it reach back to touch you.

Closing his eyes, Anakin begins to concentrate on Ben's commands. As he does so, a whirlwind of colours begins to swirl around the two Jedi, growing in size and intensity the longer Anakin concentrates.

As Obi-Wan watches, countless images begin to form within the centre of the vortex -- countless faces of loved ones and enemies, various landscapes from different locations, all drawn from memory or imagination -- and he smiles.

ANAKIN: I can feel it working, Ben! I can feel the Force!

OBI-WAN: That's good, Anakin, that's excellent! The Force is with you now! (beat) Now reach out with the Force! Find your horizons and expand them!

The coloured whirlwind of whirling images reshapes into a perfect sphere and begins to expand outward, overtaking and erasing the dreamscape of Ogana Major as it grows. Soon, the images swirling through the walls of the sphere enhance, growing in clarity and significance, showing people, places, and things beyond Anakin's immediate experience.

Suddenly, without warning, Anakin reels over, grimacing with pain, clutching his head as he collapses to his knees.

OBI-WAN: (alarmed) Anakin!

ANAKIN: (tears streaming down his tightly-shut eyes) God, Ben, what is this?! My mind -- it's being torn apart!

Before the Jedi knight can respond, the sphere bursts like a bubble. Psychic energy lashes out, and with a joint scream, the two Jedi disappear in a sudden flash flood of absolute blackness.

INT. NYAX/OBI-WAN, ANAKIN, & SIRI'S CELL

Obi-Wan's eyes fly open, and he finds himself back in the cell, blood flowing from his nose. Pinching his nostrils shut to staunch the nosebleed, he turns to his left, where Anakin lies shaking -- his eyes rolled up into the back of his head and his teeth chattering rapidly -- caught in a violent seizure.

OBI-WAN: (alarmed) Lord, Anakin!

Disregarding his own paltry nosebleed, Ben moves quickly, grabbing Nik by his upper right arm while placing his own right hand down over the boy's forehead.

Closing his eyes, the Jedi knight opens himself to the Force, and within moments Anakin's violent tremblings subside, leaving the boy in a peaceful unconsciousness. Once he is certain Anakin is alright, he turns to face Siri, who sits kneeling before him with her hands crossed in her lap, her face completely blank of expression.

OBI-WAN: (wipes blood from under his nose) What the hell just happened!?

Siri doesn't reply. Instead her eyes roll up into her head and she falls face-forward, collapsing with all the grace of a rag doll.

OBI-WAN: Siri!

Scrambling forward toward the female Jedi Knight, Ben pulls her upright, bracing her against him. Pushing her hair out of her face, he turns her head left then right, trying to determine whether she is dead or alive. As her pupils dilate and she continues to breathe, it is apparent that she is alive, though in a deep state of catatonia.

PRE VIZSLA: (O.S.) Don't concern yourself with her, Kenobi. She will be well momentarily.

Obi-Wan turns toward the source of the voice. Pre Vizsla -- clad in full armour -- steps out from the deep shadow at the far end of the cell and walks up to the Jedi.

OBI-WAN: (angry) What did you do to them?

PRE VIZSLA: I merely deactivated certain portions of their brains. It is a relatively simple task to do for one with my skills, and it isn't permanently debilitating -- usually.

OBI-WAN: Restore them!

PRE VIZSLA: Of course.

Without even a gesture, Pre Vizsla follows through on his promise. Siri and Anakin instantly regain full consciousness and awareness, their eyes opening wide in stark terror, their chests heaving with rapid breathing.

OBI-WAN: (to Anakin and Siri both) Are you alright? Are you okay?

ANAKIN: Yes.

SIRI: I'll be fine in a moment.

OBI-WAN: (turns back to Vizsla) Why did you do that?

PRE VIZSLA: Consider it a demonstration or, better yet, a warning. (beat) I know what you're trying to do, Kenobi, and it won't work. Every paltry doctrine you try to instill upon the boy will be shattered with the awesome truth of the Force.

As one, the three Jedi rise to their feet, facing the Force-wielding Mandalorian warrior.

SIRI: You made a mistake coming here alone, Mandalorian. There's three of us and only one of you.

PRE VIZSLA: (laughs) As a revered Jedi master once said: "Size matters not".

Throwing out a hand, Vizsla seizes the three Jedi in an all-encompassing grip, immediately freezing them in place.

PRE VIZSLA: (cont'd) Two knights and a novice are no match for me. It would do you well to remember that, my friends.

Vizsla turns to face the cell door, and it immediately unlocks and slides open, allowing five security 'droids to step inside.

PRE VIZSLA: You're going to take a trip with me, Jedi. There's something I'd have you see.

INT. NYAX/SPARRING CHAMBER

The main door leading in-and-out of the sparring chamber slides open, and Obi-Wan and Siri are violently shoved inside. Just as they right themselves and turn around, the door slides shut and locks. Turning away from the door, they find themselves standing alone in the vast, empty chamber.

SIRI: (to the chamber) Where am we? What are we doing here?

The Jedi wait to receive some sort of response from somewhere in this vast, empty sparring chamber.

INT. NYAX/OBSERVATION DECK

Vizsla enters the observation deck overlooking the sparring chamber, Anakin and the security 'droids behind him. As they step up to the transparisteel observation windows, the Jedi down in the chamber below look up, spotting them.

INT. NYAX/SPARRING CHAMBER

SIRI: (angry) Speak, damn you!

INT. NYAX/OBSERVATION DECK

PRE VIZSLA: You sound frustrated, Mistress Jedi --

INT. NYAX/SPARRING CHAMBER

PRE VIZSLA: (O.C.) (cont'd) -- is there a problem?

SIRI: You tell me!

PRE VIZSLA: (O.C.) Such passion in your voice, Mistress Jedi!

INT. NYAX/OBSERVATION DECK

PRE VIZSLA: (cont'd) You sound almost angry! Anger is not the Jedi way!

INT. NYAX/SPARRING CHAMBER

OBI-WAN: Don't worry, darksider, we can control our anger.

INT. NYAX/OBSERVATION DECK

PRE VIZSLA: Can you now? Can you really?

INT. NYAX/SPARRING CHAMBER

OBI-WAN: Come on down and find out for yourself.

PRE VIZSLA: (O.C.) (laughs) Walk to the centre of the room. I've left a gift there for each of you.

Cautiously, the two Jedi walk away from the main door towards the centre of the chamber. There, sitting upon the floor, are a pair of small lightsabers.

SIRI: (picks the lightsabers up) Neither of these is my weapon.

OBI-WAN: Nor mine.

INT. NYAX/OBSERVATION DECK

PRE VIZSLA: That would make it too easy.

INT. NYAX/SPARRING CHAMBER

PRE VIZSLA: (O.C.) (cont'd) No, they're training sabers, taken from two initiates. (beat) They have no further use for the weapons.

SIRI: (grits her teeth) Monster.

PRE VIZSLA: (O.C.) You misunderstand, Mistress Jedi -- they won't be needing them because they've both grown proficient with weapons worthy of Mandalorian neophytes. Yes, they have grown strong, and will yet grow stronger under the firm guidance of the Mandalorian Death Watch. After all, not all of the children you've brainwashed are incapable of escaping your indoctrination.

SIRI: (regards the training lightsabers) What are we supposed to use these for?

PRE VIZSLA: (O.C.) What else? Defense.

At that, several doors lining the chamber slide open, allowing ten Mandalorian Mandalorian Knights to step inside. In each of the robed figures' hands are long force pikes.

INT. NYAX/OBSERVATION DECK

PRE VIZSLA: Let's see how you fare against my elite warriors, Jedi.

INT. NYAX/SPARRING CHAMBER

The ten Mandalorians begin circling the Jedi, bringing their force pikes to bear. Siri tosses one of the training sabers to Ben and they both engage the pure white blades of their weapons, holding them out before them in defensive stances, muscles tensed and eyes narrowed.

The Mandalorian Knights move in like ravenous sharks, lunging at the Jedi Knights with their weapons. Ben and Siri counterattack, parrying blows and striking at the Knights. The low-powered blades of the training lightsabers are incapable of cutting through the weapons or the warriors, however, leaving the Jedi incapable of doing little more than slowing the Knights down momentarily.

INT. NYAX/OBSERVATION DECK

Moving away from the 'droids guarding him, Anakin steps up to Vizsla. Though the menacing automatons quickly level their blasters at him, the young Jedi initiate pays them no heed.

ANAKIN: Stop this! Let them go!

PRE VIZSLA: (turns to face Nik) Is there a good reason why I should, boy?

ANAKIN: (points down at the battle between the Jedi knights and Mandalorian Knights) It's ten against two! They don't stand a chance!

PRE VIZSLA: Size doesn't matter, boy, remember? (turns back to look down into the sparring chamber) If the Force is truly with them, it will grant them victory over my warriors.

INT. NYAX/SPARRING CHAMBER

In no time at all, the Mandalorian Knights overwhelm the Jedi knights; knocking the training saber out of Siri's hands, they strike out with their pikes, disabling her with powerful shocks to her limbs and torso. Soon she collapses, partially paralysed from the violent electrical shocks. Obi-Wan fares better, and he continues to hold his own for a couple more minutes before he, too, eventually falls.

PRE VIZSLA: (O.C.) That's enough. Power down your weapons and leave them.

INT. NYAX/OBSERVATION DECK

The Mandalorians obey Vizsla's orders automatically and quickly leave the chamber. Once they have all gone, Vizsla turns to regard Anakin, who glowers at him with smouldering hatred.

PRE VIZSLA: (strides up to Anakin) You have something to say to me, boy?

ANAKIN: Bastard! I swear I'll kill you!

PRE VIZSLA: Good -- kill me.

Without warning, Vizsla backhands Anakin across the face, sending the teenager reeling backward into the security 'droids. Before the boy can catch his bearings, the Mandalorian moves up to him, pulling him forward by his shirt before striking him across the face again.

PRE VIZSLA: Open yourself up to the anger -- the hatred -- novice. Embrace the full power of the Force and use it to destroy me.

Vizsla continues to push, pull, and slap Anakin around the observation deck, using violence to drive the boy closer and closer toward the breaking point.

PRE VIZSLA: Come now, child! You swore to kill me! You have the power! Use it!

Vizsla gives Anakin another slap across the face -- his hardest yet. With a sharp crack, Nik's nose breaks.

ANAKIN: (cups his nose in his hands) AAAAHHHH!!!!!!

PRE VIZSLA: (sighs) Pitiful. You talk with strength, but your actions are weak. You are unworthy of the Force that has been bestowed upon you. (beat) I'll make your end quick and painless, boy, though you don't deserve such an easy death.

Balling his right hand up into a fist, Vizsla throws a punch out towards Nik's face. Before the death-dealing blow can connect, however, Anakin throws up his left hand and catches it. Bearing his teeth in an animalistic snarl, he closes his hand over the Mandalorian's, breaking it.

PRE VIZSLA: AAAAHHHH!!!!!!

Anakin wrenches Vizsla's arm back, nearly dislocating the Mandalorian's shoulder, then balls his own right hand up into a fist. Before he can send a Force-reinforced punch into Vizsla's gut, however, one of the 'droids aims its blaster at the Jedi initiate and fires, taking him out with a precisely aimed stun blast.

PRE VIZSLA: (gingerly holding his crushed hand) That was good, boy, very good. You'll be a full-fledged neophyte before the year is out.

INT. NYAX/SPARRING CHAMBER

The door to the sparring chamber slides open, allowing Vizsla along with an escort of four Mandalorian Knights to step inside. Walking up to the two defeated Jedi, Vizsla looks down upon them.

PRE VIZSLA: (to Siri) That was a pathetic display, Jedi. I've seen Force adepts who refuse to even touch a physical weapon put up a better fight than you just did. It's obvious you Coruscanti Jedi rely more on the power of your lightsabers than you do upon the power of the Force. (to Ben) As for you, you fared far better than your comrade here, though you, too, still rely too heavily on physical prowess to assist you in besting your enemies.

SIRI: (stammering) The lightsaber is the life of a Jedi.

PRE VIZSLA: Then it's a life that's going to be cut frightfully short.

OBI-WAN: Then you may as well cut ours now, because neither of us will serve in your slave army.

PRE VIZSLA: In nine hours we reach our destination. We'll see if you can abide by your decision then.

With that, Vizsla turns his back on the debilitated Jedi knights and leaves.

EXT. SPACE

With flickers of pseudo-motion, the Nyax and its escort of dreadnaughts and assault ships drop out of hyperspace. They move forward, heading toward the three primary-coloured suns of the Dania star system in the distance.

Soon, the ships arrive at Dania VII, the seventh planet of the star system. Somewhat larger than Earth, Dania VII is a deep scarlet world criss-crossed with large blue-green lines of water.

Making their descent, the Mandalorian ships enter the atmosphere of the scarlet planet.

EXT. DANIA VII - LANDSCAPE - DAY

The Mandalorian ships fly through the emerald sky of Dania VII, passing over a breathtakingly beautiful landscape of red rainforest. As the roar of the ships' engines passes over the scarlet trees, flocks of exotic birds take to flight in sudden alarm.

As the ships pass over a majestic waterfall, the red forest suddenly gives way to a vast, sprawling metropolis. Though most of the city is of modern construction -- composed out of duracrete and durasteel -- the largest structures consist of towering pyramids and parapets carved from stone in long-forgotten, ancient times; composed of black basalt, the ancient structures stand like ominous sentinels over the smaller Mandalorian buildings.

EXT. METROPOLIS - DOCKYARDS - DAY

Arriving at their destination, the Nyax along with the assault ships and destroyers make their descent, touching down upon the vast dockyards of the Mandalorian metropolis. Standing in wait for them is a large prison transport and an entire platoon of armed Mandalorian warriors.

Once secure upon the ground, the Nyax begins disgorging its crew of prisoners. Each of the prisoners -- all thirty-three of them -- are led out of the dungeon ship at gunpoint and herded toward the prison transport. As the prisoners are directed toward the open hatch of the transport, the members of the platoon standing directly before the vehicle move aside to allow the captives access to it. One-by-one, the prisoners come to the prison transport, slipping past the open, dark hatch and climbing aboard.

Once all are inside, the hatch is sealed shut, and the engines of the transport come to life. And then, without further ado, the vehicle departs, leaving the dockyards for the greater city beyond.

INT. PRISON TRANSPORT/PRISONER COMPARTMENT - DAY

The thirty-three prisoners -- each of various ages, genders, and species -- sit on a pair of benches bolted to the inside of the compartment walls, despondent expressions on many of their faces. While most of them are obviously untrained in the ways of the Force, there are a few who carry an air about them which hints that they are skilled Force practitioners.

Obi-Wan, Anakin, and Siri sit together on one of the benches; while Ben and Siri stare straight ahead, their faces expressionless, Nik can't help but to look about him, turning his head this way and that way like an inquisitive bird. Currently, his attention is grabbed by the sobbing of a child located somewhere inside the large compartment.

ANAKIN: You hear that?

SIRI: It sounds like a young girl.

ANAKIN: I'm going to check it out.

OBI-WAN: Be careful, Anakin. Not all of our fellow prisoners are our friends.

ANAKIN: I'll be careful.

Rising from his spot between the two Jedi, Nik begins making his way up the aisle between the two benches, following the sound of the heavy sobs. Soon he comes to its source -- a YOUNG HUMAN GIRL, no more than eleven years of age, with pretty features and strawberry blonde hair; hunkered down between a seemingly oblivious Talz and whiphid, she cries into her hands, visibly afraid of her surroundings.

ANAKIN: (kneels down before the girl) Hey.

The girl looks up at him, sniffling.

GIRL: Hey.

ANAKIN: I couldn't help but notice you were crying. Seems to me you could use someone to talk to.

GIRL: (wipes her eyes) That'd be nice.

ANAKIN: (smiles) My name's Anakin, or Nik for short. What's yours?

GIRL: Nashira.

ANAKIN: Don't you have anyone with you, Nashira?

NASHIRA (GIRL): (shakes her head) I was returning home from school when we were attacked. (beat) Everyone else -- all my friends -- were killed. I was the only one they took back with them.

ANAKIN: (frowns) Your parents --?

NASHIRA: They're back home, on Orron III.

ANAKIN: I'll bet you miss them, don't you?

NASHIRA: (nods) I haven't seen them since before school started.

ANAKIN: I haven't seen my Mom in a while, either.

NASHIRA: You go to an offworld school, too?

ANAKIN: (laughs) Something like that. (beat) I had to leave my Mom and sister behind on Tatooine to become a Jedi.

At this news, the strawberry blonde girl perks up a bit, her pretty blue eyes sparkling.

NASHIRA: You're a Jedi!? That's so amazing! (beat) Is it true that those midi-chlorian injections hurt?

ANAKIN: (confused) Mido-what?

NASHIRA: Do you have a kyber crystal? For your energy-spear? (beat) No, I guess you don't. They would have taken it from you.

ANAKIN: I've only started my Jedi training, Nashira. I haven't learned what moto-corinthians or kyber crystals are yet.

NASHIRA: (disappointed) Oh ...

ANAKIN: (laughs) Hey, don't give up on me yet. I've already learned how to use the Force a bit.

NASHIRA: It's not that. I just thought you'd be able to save me, save all of us. (beat) No one can beat a Jedi.

ANAKIN: (sighs) Even if I was a fully trained Jedi, I don't think I'd be able to get us out of this jam.

NASHIRA: (astonished) But Jedi are invincible!

ANAKIN: (puts his hand on her shoulder) I'm sorry to disappoint you, 'Shira, but I came here with two Jedi, (looks back over his shoulder toward where Ben and Siri are seated) and they couldn't do much more than you or I could. (turns back to Nashira) It's going to take a little bit more than Jedi powers to get off this planet and get back home.

In reply, Nashira smiles.

ANAKIN: (noticing her smile) I didn't know happiness went hand-in-hand with dashed hopes.

NASHIRA: You called me 'Shira. It's what my mom and dad used to call me when I was little.

ANAKIN: Your parents, eh? Why don't you tell me about them?

NASHIRA: Will you tell me about yours?

ANAKIN: It's a deal. (beat) How about we go back to my friends, Ben and Siri, first? (looks at the whiphid and Talz sitting on either side of Nashira) I think they'd make better company than your babysitters here.

NASHIRA: (grins) Alright!

Climbing off her bench, Nashira takes Anakin by the hand, and he leads her back to where he was seated with Ben and Siri.

OBI-WAN: (to Nashira, smiling) Hello, there. Who might you be, Princess?

NASHIRA: (grins) Nashira DuQuesne.

OBI-WAN: (offers her his hand) I am Obi-Wan Kenobi, at your service.

Nashira takes his hand and give it a loose shake.

NASHIRA: Nice to meet you, Obi-Wan.

The young girl then turns to Siri, who regards her with a half-smile.

SIRI: (offers Nashira her own hand) I'm Siri.

Nashira takes Siri's hand and give it a shake as well.

NASHIRA: Pleased to meet you, too, Siri.

Moving aside, the two Jedi Knights open up enough space for Anakin and Nashira to sit down between them. Nik sits down first, then helps Nashira in beside him. No longer alone, Nashira's face glows with hope and happiness.

It feels like it's been more than eleven days since the last one....

I like your description of the planet; it sounds neat! Is Nashira Anakin's future wife? :)

Yep, Nashira is Anakin's future wife. In this story, though, they're more like foster brother-sister (for obvious reasons).