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Ranking the Star Wars films — Page 35

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 (Edited)

At last I have rewatched TFA, 4 months after my initial theater viewings.

So, my final ranking of all 7 films (note that I only like the episodes ranked 1 to 2; rank 3 is watchable; last rank wins by KO) is :

  1. ANH/TESB
  2. ROTJ
  3. ROTS
  4. TPM
  5. TFA
  6. AOTC

Now with fan edits of the PT considered instead of their theatrical counterparts (Hal9000’s versions)

  1. ANH/TESB
  2. ROTJ
  3. ROTS
  4. TPM
  5. AOTC
  6. TFA

The TV series:

  1. Clone Wars
  2. Rebels
  3. The Clone Wars

Well, I guess now I don’t really care about VIII and IX. I will watch them (and most probably I will buy the soundtrack albums) but I feel uninterested about what’s happening next. The saga ends with ROTJ for me, and starts with a good fan edit of the PT when I’m in a good mood (I could reconsider if a very strong new cut of VII was to be edited some day). I sincerely thought I would enjoy it more knowing the flaws and the strengths, but it seems it didn’t work as I would have loved it to work. Hopefully James Cameron is going to deliver the Avatar sequels that could quench thirst for good sci-fi flicks in the next few years. David Twohy might also finish his Riddick saga with a fourth entry. As for Rogue One, I’ll wait for it without any hopes.

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 (Edited)

I always found the idea of our heroes dancing with teddy bears and winning a war (thanks to teddy bears) that should have gone on way longer to not be the finale Star Wars deserved. Even if TFA had been a total shit biscuit I would have been glad it pretty much negated the ending of ROTJ. Hopefully XII gives us the finale we deserve.

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Yeah the ewok part of ROTJ is shitty but the movie has more to offer. And at least it concludes the trilogy. I sigh a little every time I finish TESB because I know what’s coming next is a disappointment. The weakness of ROTJ does not strength in any way TFA which is even weaker. The finale of TFA does not need furry characters to be shittier. It has Rey, worst SW main character ever.

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MalàStrana said:

Yeah the ewok part of ROTJ is shitty but the movie has more to offer.

At least the Vader and Luke stuff was fucking great.

The weakness of ROTJ does not strength in any way TFA which is even weaker.

Well that’s not the only weakness. The Luke being Leia siblings thing was a cheap way of solving the love triangle and shrunk the universe and Yoda dying seemed forced. Also they never explained how Luke grew so much in strength between ESB and ROTJ; they didn’t even have a throw away line. And Death Star 2.0 is a more overt rehash than SKB.

The finale of TFA does not need furry characters to be shittier.

The only thing bad about the 3rd act of TFA is that it was rushed, the attack on SKB was eh…and Leia and Chewie don’t hug. In comparison to the silly fairy tale ending of ROTJ it was a masterpiece.

It has Rey, worst SW main character ever.

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No, it’s true. Rey is much worse than…

-Jar-Jar
-Little Ani
-Grown-up Ani
-Nute Gunray
-Elan Sleazebagano
-The farting Eopie
-Greg Proops and the other head
-Firecracker-in-his-ass Yoda
-Backwards-talking-turned-up-to-11 Yoda
-In-love-with-Chewie Yoda
-Flying R2
-Blue-faced George
-Blue-faced Katie
-General Grievous
-Stunted Slime Nemoidian
-Girlfriend Beru
-Stiff-as-a-board Queen Amidala
-Panakacakes
-Spittleface Boss Nass
-That frog that eats a rat outside Jabba’s palace and then burps, foretelling the coming stain of the PT
-Boobs McTwi’lek

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 (Edited)

Well he did say main character but that doesn’t make the claim that less inane. Plus Luke and Anakin had three films to flesh them out whereas Rey has had one so I may be out of line when saying this but maybe we should wait until her arc is over before rendering judgement.

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TV’s Frink said:

No, it’s true. Rey is much worse than…

-Elan Sleazebagano

Nope. Sleavebagano was one of the best things about AOTC, and even the whole saga, and I’m not even being sarcastic.

Not enough people read the EU.

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Elan Sleazebagano is probably my favorite ‘terrible name’ from the PT. I mean, I wouldn’t be surprised if George himself named him.

Army of Darkness: The Medieval Deadit | The Terminator - Color Regrade | The Wrong Trousers - Audio Preservation
SONIC RACES THROUGH THE GREEN FIELDS.
THE SUN RACES THROUGH A BLUE SKY FILLED WITH WHITE CLOUDS.
THE WAYS OF HIS HEART ARE MUCH LIKE THE SUN. SONIC RUNS AND RESTS; THE SUN RISES AND SETS.
DON’T GIVE UP ON THE SUN. DON’T MAKE THE SUN LAUGH AT YOU.

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LuckyGungan2001 said:

TV’s Frink said:

No, it’s true. Rey is much worse than…

-Elan Sleazebagano

Nope. Sleavebagano was one of the best things about AOTC, and even the whole saga, and I’m not even being sarcastic.

He said Rey was worse than those characters (albeit being sarcastic).

Army of Darkness: The Medieval Deadit | The Terminator - Color Regrade | The Wrong Trousers - Audio Preservation
SONIC RACES THROUGH THE GREEN FIELDS.
THE SUN RACES THROUGH A BLUE SKY FILLED WITH WHITE CLOUDS.
THE WAYS OF HIS HEART ARE MUCH LIKE THE SUN. SONIC RUNS AND RESTS; THE SUN RISES AND SETS.
DON’T GIVE UP ON THE SUN. DON’T MAKE THE SUN LAUGH AT YOU.

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Dek Rollins said:

Elan Sleazebagano is probably my favorite ‘terrible name’ from the PT. I mean, I wouldn’t be surprised if George himself named him.

Darth Icky

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My ranking isn’t too different from the norm. However, I’m going to use my edits of the PT films in place of the originals.

ESB - Pure cinematic genius; could watch any time
ANH - Groundbreaking cinematic joy, only very slightly hindered by a dip in pace partway through
ROTJ - Fun and exciting, if a bit juvenile, conclusion to the trilogy featuring a nice subversive subplot of the redemption of the villian
TFA - Fun ride to restart the franchise and set things up going forward, though lacks the weight of the prior stories to an extent; very similar to Trek '09 in that respect, and it’s evaluation will largely depend on how the subsequent films go
COD (Ep1) - Stylized opening to the prequel trilogy with stilted, dry performances and directing; has all the trappings of a Star Wars film with an inescapably boring bent
LOE (Ep3) - Downbeat and somber ending to the ostensibly tragic PT, which is still a chore to get through, with everything falling quickly into place as if the author ran out of time
TAS (Ep2) - Awkward middle film with little in the way of an independent story, plagued by bad ideas and awkward acting/directing

If you’re up for it, I still recommend reading the novelizations of the prequels in place of watching the films.

I know I’ve made some very poor decisions recently.

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Elan Sleazebagano wasn’t a name exaggerated for comedic effect?

The Person in Question

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That would be too sensible. It really is supposed to be his real name.

I know I’ve made some very poor decisions recently.

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The EU christened him Elan Sel’Sabagno. I guess even they realized how stupid a name “Sleazebaggano” was and had to retcon it.

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DuracellEnergizer said:

The EU christened him Elan Sel’Sabagno.

I left my wallet with Elan Sel’Sabagno… he never returned it.

VIZ TOP TIPS! - PARENTS. Impress your children by showing them a floppy disk and telling them it’s a 3D model of a save icon.

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Ah, you had me with your list of rules until you stipulated TFA had to be better than the Prequels. There I beg to differ. I think you have to start with an awesome story and, as the edits and novelizations prove, the stories are good. I found TFA to be weak in that area. Abrams excels at character vinettes, but tends to fail at the greater story arc a movie or TV series needs. He is horrible with endings, which may be why instead of a real ending, we get a “to be continued” setup for the next film. TFA is rubbish in so many ways. It has great dialog, set design, and character development, but no substance and so many breaks in logical story telling that it is only the homages to the OT and the great characters that make it watchable.

And please tell me that Cameron isn’t actually going to do more Avatar movies. I couldn’t stomach sitting through another CG crapfest like that again. Worst SF movie I have ever seen.

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yotsuya said:

Ah, you had me with your list of rules until you stipulated TFA had to be better than the Prequels. There I beg to differ. I think you have to start with an awesome story and, as the edits and novelizations prove, the stories are good.

Or not.

I found TFA to be weak in that area. Abrams excels at character vinettes, but tends to fail at the greater story arc a movie or TV series needs. He is horrible with endings, which may be why instead of a real ending, we get a “to be continued” setup for the next film.

I know, right? The Empire Strikes Back is a horrible movie.

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yotsuya said:

Abrams excels at character vinettes, but tends to fail at the greater story arc a movie or TV series needs. He is horrible with endings, which may be why instead of a real ending, we get a “to be continued” setup for the next film. TFA is rubbish in so many ways.

So you must feel the same way about the prequels then because every single one of their endings whad a “to be continued” set up for the next episode. TPM with the whole sith/ palpatine " was it the master or the apprentice" thing. AOTC with the beginning of the clone wars and seeing the ships taking off and then ROTS basically setting up for the continuation into episode 4.

ANH:REVISITED
ESB:REVISITED

DONATIONS TOWARDS MATERIALS FOR THE REVISITED SAGA

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 (Edited)

The logical inconsistencies in pro-prequel arguments never fail to make me laugh.

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yotsuya said:
It has great dialog, set design, and character development, but no substance and so many breaks in logical story telling that it is only the homages to the OT and the great characters that make it watchable.

And the only way the PT is watchable is with the help of illicit substances.

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TV’s Frink said:

The logical inconsistencies in pro-prequel arguments never fail to make me laugh.

Only to be beaten by the emptiness of pro-TFA arguments 😄

PT, TFA… all are shitty.

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MalàStrana said:
Only to be beaten by the emptiness of pro-TFA arguments 😄

Arguments that often end in favor of the pro-TFA people 😉