What do you want to happen in the the rest of the ST? — Page 6

flametitan said:

Lord Haseo said:

If she had her mind altered like Revan her being dropped on Jakku as a child could be a false memory meaning she only got dropped off there once.

That leads to my second point: Her whole backstory as we know it is a lie, which I’d rather not have, as it’s removing backstory for the sake of having a twist, rather than adding to the plot.

All we know about Rey is that she was presumably left on Jakku by her family as a child under the “care” of Unkar Plutt. That’s hardly a backstory; it’s only a notch above a premise for a backstory. Also couldn’t you say that about the “No, I am your father” twist? Furthermore, I am of the opinion that both twists would add to the plot significantly.

Lord Haseo said:

flametitan said:

Lord Haseo said:

If she had her mind altered like Revan her being dropped on Jakku as a child could be a false memory meaning she only got dropped off there once.

That leads to my second point: Her whole backstory as we know it is a lie, which I’d rather not have, as it’s removing backstory for the sake of having a twist, rather than adding to the plot.

All we know about Rey is that she was presumably left on Jakku as a child under the “care” of Unkar Plutt. That’s hardly a backstory; it’s only a notch above a premise for a backstory. Also couldn’t you say that about the “No, I am your father” twist? Furthermore, I am of the opinion that both twists would add to the plot significantly.

I’m not of that opinion, because you’re not changing her interactions and relations. She’d still hate Kylo Ren, she’d still barely know Luke (Even if she did know him once upon a time), and she still needs to be trained. Nothing has changed about her connection to anyone, except that she’s now a former Jedi apprentice rather than a scrapyard scavenger.

“I am your father,” while it did alter the backstory, it worked for a couple of reasons. The big one, though, was that it completely changed the dynamic between Darth Vader and Luke Skywalker. Before their confrontation at Bespin, Luke was raring to fight Vader; he wanted revenge for the Death of his father. After the revelation, Luke became hesitant to fight Vader; he didn’t want to be the one to kill his father, even though everyone else was practically begging for him to do so. If he was still raring to kill Vader, it wouldn’t be nearly as impactful as it we know it is now.

It can work, but I currently don’t see a matrix style “Your life is a lie” twist changing everything just yet.

I would love to see the good guys and First Order team-up against some more powerful enemy

flametitan said:
I’m not of that opinion, because you’re not changing her interactions and relations. She’d still hate Kylo Ren, she’d still barely know Luke (Even if she did know him once upon a time),

Just because she barely knows Luke doesn’t mean her feelings towards him can’t change from knowing that information. Either knowing that he was the one to wipe her mind or that he knowingly suppressed the information can change the entire dynamic of their relationships. Especially if they grow to care about one another throughout VIII and potentially IX.

As it pertains to Kylo who knows what she would think. If they revealed that she was at one point a Knight of Ren (which I don’t want) she would probably be at an impasse.

and she still needs to be trained

Not if her consciousness is completely restored. If I’m not mistaken this happened in the Revan novel. But I hope even if she got her mind wiped she would still have to train.

Luke became hesitant to fight Vader; he didn’t want to be the one to kill his father, even though everyone else was practically begging for him to do so.

The only reason he became hesitant was because he felt good in Vader and wanted to turn him back to the path of decency.

EDIT:

HansiG said:

I would love to see the good guys and First Order team-up against some more powerful enemy

Such as?

Deleted. Sorry.

Lord Haseo said:

BillionaireHobo287 said:
Yeah, maybe in Episode VII where the Knights of Ren just stand dramatically in Rey’s vision and do nothing else.

Wait what? lol

I like that the the direction you’re going with the Rey/Luke dynamic but I’m not particularly enthralled with Han being resurrected. Reason one being that wasn’t Rexus Ren supposed to be killed so that they could use him/her as a test subject? Secondly, it cheapens Han’s death.

Um… Did you read the whole thing? Don’t really want to spoil anything about Han and the Knights of Ren. I know ressurection cheapens death.

Nah, Rexus Ren just got shipped to Snoke to be killed. Too boring to write out because we already know he’s going to die.

Deleted

Deleted

BillionaireHobo287 said:
Um… Did you read the whole thing?

Not all at once.

BillionaireHobo287 said:
Young Rey: Why are you crying?

Ben Solo sees Rey and runs away to another secluded place.

Young Rey: Why are you running?

Ben Solo: I prefer being alone.

Young Rey: Why?

Ben Solo: They always make fun of me when I cry.

You really took those Kylo Ren emo pictures to heart lol

Young Rey and Ben laugh. Rey smiles at her past self, but suddenly, the wall behind her breaks and she is transported to another memory. The Jedi Academy is suffering an ugly downpour of rain, and the Knights of Ren, who have much larger numbers than anything we’ve seen before, are slaughtering the Jedi Academy students. Rey sees her younger self run out of the Academy fearlessly into the downpour, taking as many fellow Padawans and Younglings as possible. Suddenly, a Knight of Ren appears in front of the students. The students start to run in another direction, but another Knight of Ren appears in front of them and kills several students. The first Knight of Ren they ran into kills all the remaining students except Rey then prepares to strike Rey when suddenly, he is stabbed in the back with the red lightsaber of… Kylo Ren.

This is exactly what I would want to happen but Pablo Hidalgo confirmed that the shots of Kylo killing the guy and the Knights of Ren in the rain during Rey’s Force Vision is not the attack on Luke’s academy, but some other massacre.

Supreme Leader: The General has failed me. Under his weak leadership, a stormtrooper revolted and became the end of Starkiller Base. Kill him.

Captain Phasma: As you wish.

Hux: Please, Phasma! I can serve under you!

Captain Phasma loads a blaster and shoots Hux dead.

I would have preferred that Kylo killed them. The prospect of their bantering turning into a schism is would be fun and original as it pertains to the Star Wars films. But on the otherhand Phasma needs to establish credibility whenever she can.

Deleted

Lord Haseo said:

HansiG said:

I would love to see the good guys and First Order team-up against some more powerful enemy

Such as?

idk some kind of xXsIthl0rD420Xx

Swazzy said:

Lord Haseo said:

I think he’s saying your write up is so good that he’ll end up hating the actual film because it might not be as good.

^^^^^^

Eh, well, I kinda wish I developed the (non romantic) Finn and Poe storylines more, but rewriting would leave people in the dark when I start my Act III.

Before I start my Act III, I do want to bust what I think is a misconception about The Force.

That starting down the path of the dark side will mean you will be evil forever. Yoda says that if you start using the dark side, it will forever dominate your destiny. It was the main reason people thought Luke was going to be evil in Episode VII. Luke did start down the dark path, and he paid the price: he was inedaquate as a teacher, his students were slaughtered, and he’s been wracked with guilt since, but Luke is clearly not evil. Vader became the second evilest guy in the galaxy, and because of that, he redeemed himself by saving Luke from the Emperor at the cost of his own life. Basically, doing something dark side-ish will bite you in the butt later on but won’t mean that you are evil.

HansiG said:

xXsIthl0rD420Xx

Them Sith Lords are always snokin weed.

Is anybody else going to post their takes on Episode VIII and IX? The more, the merrier I say.

Edit: Tips from that guy who has been posting Episode VIII bits the last two pages:

1. Focus on the emotion of the story and the journey of the characters NOT lightsaber colors and superficial stuff like that.

Why do you think the OT characters are so good? The characters need to change. Luke starts off a slightly spoiled inexperienced farm boy in Episode IV and ends a badass peaceful Jedi in Episode VI. Leia pretends to hate Han at first but learns to be more in touch with her emotions. Han starts off a selfish rogue but learns to be selfless.

You also need to make those changes organic. Look at Anakin in the prequels! First, he’s a Gary Stu darling kid, then he’s a whiny stalker brat, then later a crazy child murderer, and lastly a badass Sith lord with little to no context for the changes. So Anakin destroys planets and murders children because… he had a dream his girlfriend was going to die?

Think of the characters as people. What would you do and say if you had their histories and personalities? What histories would the characters need to have to act the way they do? (Not to brag or anything, but I’m a little proud of my motivations for Kylo Ren)

P.S. If you are following my Episode VIII, I can tell you the characters are going to change drastically in Act III.

2. Don’t overexplain the setting. Part of what makes Star Wars so great is that (before the prequels) it doesn’t bother explaining stuff it doesn’t need to, and that makes the world seem more natural. Knowledge of the setting should flow organically or be implied through the characters’ dialouge. Imagine if two adults explained what World War I was mid-conversation for no reason.

3. Let the characters make the decisions for you. Channel their histories and personalities into every little thing they say and do. Don’t force something dumb like a Force Switcheroo where Rey becomes evil and Kylo Ren becomes good because it’s your stupid neat idea.

4. Don’t assume the audience immediately relates to your characters. Work for their emphathy and sympathy. Rey works in the Force Awakens because she’s an underdog who is good at what she does and it’s admirable. Poe works because he’s just a funny good guy to everybody, including stormtroopers. Finn works because he’s just a normal guy forced to do something he realizes he doesn’t want to do.

5. Always have the characters move the plot forward and not the other way around. If your main characters (not the side characters) are too reactive, your audience will not admire them and will just get bored. Even the character deciding to do nothing despite peer pressure counts as moving the plot forward.

The only exception is when you want the lack of agency to make seemingly bad people more tragic. (like Ben being brainwashed)

BillionaireHobo287 said:
I only follow the canon of the seven Episodes/movies. It’s better that I deviate from the actual movie so that less possible spoilers occur.

You mean spoilers for TFA? If so then the statute of limitations are way past due on that.

Well, I do like the idea of bantering villains so I did that with the Knights of Ren. I don’t know how Hux could otherwise be an interesting character besides the banter, and my story has lots of arcs and subplots going on already.

Hux seems to be fanatical about the First Order so having him cling to those ideals while Kylo clings to his would make for a good spark for a schism.

LuckyGungan2001 said:

I also want to see all the main characters contribute to killing Snoke.

*automatically imagines all protagonists taking turns punching, kicking, shooting, slashing, stabbing, hacking, and beating with blunt objects Snoke*

I am so glad I am never going to ever see that movie.

DuracellEnergizer said:

LuckyGungan2001 said:

I also want to see all the main characters contribute to killing Snoke.

*automatically imagines all protagonists taking turns punching, kicking, shooting, slashing, stabbing, hacking, and beating with blunt objects Snoke*

It’s the perfect ending. After all, it’s probably how 90% of D&D games end. And if Thousands of nerds end their own stories that way, why can’t Star Wars?

Deleted

BillionaireHobo287 said:

Lord Haseo said:

BillionaireHobo287 said:
I only follow the canon of the seven Episodes/movies. It’s better that I deviate from the actual movie so that less possible spoilers occur.

You mean spoilers for TFA? If so then the statute of limitations are way past due on that.

Well, I do like the idea of bantering villains so I did that with the Knights of Ren. I don’t know how Hux could otherwise be an interesting character besides the banter, and my story has lots of arcs and subplots going on already.

Hux seems to be fanatical about the First Order so having him cling to those ideals while Kylo clings to his would make for a good spark for a schism.

No. I was talking about Episode 8. If I diverge from the canon, there’s less chance of repeating the same events that Rian Johnson wrote.

takes deep breath Here goes. ACT III has been my least planned out, so hopefully this doesn’t suck.

ACT III
Cut to Ben Solo sulking on the peak of the Ahch-To steps. Linas Ren walks up the steps and to Ben.

Linas Ren: We have done everything you have asked. The corpses of the students came long ago. We did everything right, but… They all met the same fate as Han Solo.

Ben Solo is silent.

Linas Ren: I am truly sorry, boss. The method is perfect, but they simply don’t want to live. I ask for your permission to become immortal.

Ben Solo: And forever know pain? If that’s acceptable to you, then you don’t need my permission if you don’t get in the way of what I’m about to do.

Ben Solo stands up and storms off into the Force Temple, where the Knights of Ren have prepared the obtainment of immortality.

Syma Ren: Ready for eternal life?

Ben Solo ignores Syma Ren and uses the Force to pull the ceremonial black knife needed for immortality to his hand and catches it.

Ben Solo: The galaxy is not ours for the taking. Become immortal if you wish, but help me restore the galaxy to order and peace.

Syma Ren: You lost me there. I’m Mandalorian. I live to fight.

Syma Ren activates his wrist flamethrower to scorch Ben, but Ben uses the Force at the last second to keep the fire floating mid-air away from him. Syma Ren continously pumps out more fire and Ben can’t keep the fire from burning him forever. Suddenly, Jeffrey Ren goes around the floating fire and strikes Ben in the face. Ben reels from the hit and prepares to stab Jeffrey with the black knife, but is struck again from behind by another Knight of Ren. Ben is now on the floor but he realizes that he is out of range from his Force retained wall of fire, so he lets go of the fire so that it moves in its intended direction towards the two Knights of Ren that attacked him, scorching them dead. Ben activates his lightaaber but before Ben can stand up, Syma Ren strikes him repeatedly with a lightsaber of his own and Ben can barely block the hits and stay alive.

Syma Ren(viciously): How I love killing Jedi!

Ben uses the Force to push Syma Ren into the air and ends their stalemate. Syma Ren activates his jetpack. Ben stands up and crushes his jetpack using the Force, which causes it to explode and Syma Ren to fall to the ground while burning while his lightsaber falls far from him. Ben uses the Force to push Syma’s activated lightsaber straight towards Syma’s exposed back, impaling and killing him.

Ben Solo: I’m no Jedi.

Ben uses the Force to pull Syma’s stolen blue Padawan lightsaber towards his hand and catches it then looks menacingly at Nexo Ren.

Nexo Ren(quickly): I’m fine breathing.

Linas Ren then appears in the Force Temple battle area and sees the Knights of Ren corpses).

Linas Ren(terrified but pretending to chuckle): Oh, so that’s what you meant! Can I still be immortal?

Ben Solo(out of breath): Do the ceremony. Then we’re leaving to D’Qar.

Linas Ren: To do what? Destroy the Resistance or the First Order?

Ben Solo: Both.

Nexo Ren: I’m staying here.

Cut to Finn on D’Qar. He marches through the Resistance base hallways both furious and terrified. He enters the storage library, and a kind old librarian greets him.

Librarian: How is your day?

Finn: I need the mission report for the Battle of Starkiller Base.

Librarian: Specifically what is it you want to know?

Finn: Who took the shot that destroyed the base?

The Librarian takes out the mission report file for Starkiller Base and flips through its pages.

Librarian: I believe it was somebody by the name of… Poe Dameron! That’s it!

Finn looks horrified.

Librarian: Are you okay, son?

Finn starts to walk out of the library but stops.

Finn(resisting crying): What is the First Order known to do with the families of stormtroopers?

Librarian: We know that newborns are taken from their families and trained to be stormtroopers, but their families simply disappear. Either they are killed or are held prisoner, but since the First Order only had one secret uninflitrated base to keep them prisoner in then that means…

Finn: They all died in Starkiller Base.

Finn walks out of the room.

Librarian(deeply disturbed): Dear lord. What have we done?

Cut to the Resistance command center. Leia is keeping the workers on task.

Resistance Worker(to Leia): Sir, we are sensing the First Order fleet coming in from hyperspace.

Leia: Finally. I’ll see you in hell, Snoke!

Cut to the Resistance hangar. Pilots are commanding their T-49 Airspeeders. Poe Dameron walks around as if searching for something.

Poe: Hey guys, have you seen Finn?

Pilot: You mean the stormtrooper? I ain’t fighting with him.

Finn appears, furious and wracked with guilt, and ignores the Pilot and Poe and marches straight to the T-49 Airspeeder.

Pilot: Hey, Finn! Aren’t all you stormtroopers supposed to be white or something?

Poe: Are you okay, man?

Finn: I’m fine.

Poe: Hey, don’t listen to that guy. Fight a couple more battles and I guarentee you’ll get respect.

Finn: Just fly the Airspeeder already.

Poe jumps in the pilot seat and flies the Airspeeder to the battle above.

Meanwhile, the Knights of Ren land on D’Qar. They walk out of the ship fearlessly. A First Order stormtrooper shoots at Ben, but Ben unflinchingly uses the Force to fling the laser blast right back at him without even looking. Other nearby First Order troopers stop in their tracks, contemplating what to do.

Ben Solo: The Supreme Leader has betrayed our founding principle and has become chaotic. Follow me or suffer the consequences!

Ben walks forward fearlessly, and all nearby stormtroopers decide to follow him. Ben’s Knights and stormtroopers plow through Resistance forces. Before Ben can behead a Resistance soldier with his lightsaber, he hears Rey.

Rey: Ben!

Ben deactivates his lightsaber and sheaths it.

Ben: Scavenger.

Rey: Stop acting like you don’t know me! I remember everything, Ben!

Ben(deeply saddened): Then why are you still talking to me? I killed all your friends.

Rey: I know you didn’t mean for them to stay dead.

Ben(resisting crying): But they’re still dead. I’m sorry. We tried.

Rey: I know. Luke had a vision of what your Knights of Ren were doing. Loss happens to everybody, but if you don’t let go and move on, you will be consumed by your own hate.

Ben(confused): What are you talking about? There is only hate. It gives you strength.

Rey(walking towards Ben): That’s what Snoke tells you, but you only need to remember to know that’s a lie.

Rey puts her hand near Ben’s face and uses the Force to make him remember the happiness of his childhood in the Hosnian system, and later his friendship with Rey. The vision ends, and Ben falls to the floor exhausted.

Ben(confused): What have you done to me? I feel strange… warm.

Rey: It’s called happiness.

Ben: Happiness?

Ben stands up despite his exhaustion.

Ben: Will you at least help me destroy the First Order?

Rey: No. Only use the Force for knowledge and defense. I believe in you Ben. You can still be a Jedi.

Ben: I’m a Sith. Please, Rey. Stay out of my way and you won’t get hurt.

Rey: I can’t do that.

Ben stands silent for a moment.

Ben: Then prepare to see your friends again in the afterlife.

Ben takes out his red crossguard and blue lightsabers and swings them at Rey, but Rey unflinchingly keeps the lightsabers from touching her using only The Force.

Rey: You aren’t like this, Ben! Snoke is manipulating you!

Ben: I don’t follow Snoke anymore. This is my decision.

Linas Ren appears and pushes Rey towards Ben. Since Rey is still tensely using the Force, Ben is launched into the air. Rey uses the Force to stop Ben’s momentum and starts to ease him down into the ground, but Linas orders the stormtroopers to shoot her. Rey blocks the first few blasts with the Force, but soon they start stinging her. Linas Ren, being immortal, plows through the blasts and attacks Rey with his staff. Rey loses her grip on Ben. He falls down but softens his landing using the Force. Rey takes out her lightsaber and engages the Knights of Ren in lightsaber combat.

Meanwhile, Poe and Finn can barely survive in the aerial battle above D’Qar due to a lack of teamwork.

Poe(over the loudness of battle): Bad day to take down TIE Fighters?

Finn(whispering): Understatement of the century.

Poe: What? Didn’t hear you!

Finn: Nothing! I know you need a co-pilot for this thing, but I barely started flying a few days ago!

Poe: Then why did you get into the co-pilot seat?

Finn: Too angry to think! Let’s board one of the Star Destroyers instead! I’m better with a blaster than an Airspeeder!

Poe(shouting): Are you crazy?

Finn: Yes.

Poe: Alright, let’s do it!

Poe flies the Airspeeder over to the nearest Star Destroyer and narrowly shoots out the rayshields despite heavy blaster fire then lands inside the Star Destroyer, shooting everything in sight. The two pilots get off the Airspeeder and engage in an intense battle with the surviving stormtroopers until the hangar is cleared of live stormtroopers.

Cut to reinforcement stormtroopers about to shoot Finn and Poe. They enter the hangar and see two stormtroopers.

Stormtrooper 1: It’s the traitor and Dameron! They’re heading for the bridge!

Stormtrooper 2(whispering): We are?

Stormtrooper 1: Yes! FN… 1234! They are! (to stormtrooper squad) He just hit his head right now.

Stormtrooper 2: Oh yeah! Forgot about that.

Stormtrooper Squad Leader: These guys seem legit. To the bridge, buttsmellers!

Stormtrooper Squad (in unison): Yes sir!

The squad moves out of sight. Stormtrooper 1 removes his helmet and is revealed to be Finn. Stormtrooper 2 does the same and is revealed to be Poe.

Finn: I thought you were supposed to be the best Resistance fighter!

Poe: They don’t give acting classes in the Academy!

Finn: They should!

Poe: Alright, what’s the plan?

Finn: Find the prisoner records and kick ass.

Poe: Prisoner records?

Finn: I’ll explain later.

Poe and Finn put on their stormtrooper helmets, and traverse the Star Destroyer hallways to the Storage Room.

Finn(to Poe): Look for the Starkiller Base records.

General Phasma(suddenly) I have them right here, (distastefully) “Finn”.

Finn and Poe turn to look at Phasma, holographic file in hand.

Finn(scared): How did you know we would come here.

General Phasma(to Finn): The Supreme Leader knows all.

Finn: You’re not going to show me what’s in that file, are you?

Phasma shows the contents of the file through holograms.

General Phasma: You were taken from your family at such an early age that you were never given a first name, but your family name is “Nightrunner”. When stormtroopers like you rebel, they are told earlier than most that if they continue their service until they become elderly or unfit for service, (saddened) they will meet their families in Starkiller Base and live a normal life.

Poe(guilty): I had no idea.

Finn(saddened): It’s okay, man.

General Phasma: If you knew, you wouldn’t change your decision. When the galaxy is threatened, “heroes” like you don’t care about the lowly grunts of the “villains”. (to Finn) Continue aiding the Resistance, and you will only continue to suffer. Rejoin the First Order and you will be able to see your family and friends again.

Finn: How? They’re dead!

General Phasma: The Supreme Leader has discovered the secret of ressurection. Another interesting fact : do you remember the death that caused you to rebel in the first place? The person who killed him goes by the name of Dameron, Poe.

Poe(on the verge of tears): You know I wouldn’t do these things if I just knew better.

Finn(outraged): Don’t you dare try to justify yourself! You’ve taken everything away from me!

General Phasma(to Finn): The Resistance is ignorant and naive. With your inside information, we can destroy them in minutes. Refuse to rejoin and I tell every measly stormtrooper that you killed their families and-

Phasma loads her blaster and points it at Poe.

Finn: Shoot him and I will never join you.

General Phasma: Are you certain of that?

Phasma shoots Poe in the heart then points the blaster at Finn. Finn starts crying.

General Phasma: The Resistance cannot save him. The First Order can.

Finn(both furious and depressed): Why are you doing this? I hate you!

General Phasma: Then do as you wish.

Phasma throws her blaster at the floor and a riot baton at Finn, who catches it, then activates a baton of her own.

General Phasma: Fight.

ACT III TO BE CONTINUED

antenna
window
window
window
balcony
window
window
window
balcony
window
window
window
retail shops
retail shops
parking
plaza
BUNNY

It’s been a long time since I’ve seen The Bunny™ transcript … a long time.