Wow, that comparison is fucking fantastic.
Anyway, apart from certain phrasing inconsistencies and missing function-words (e.g., using “the GOUT” or “the DeEd-R” in certain instances but omitting "The" at other times by simply using “GOUT”), alternating between UK English and American English (color vs. colour and lightsabre vs. lightsaber), and certain cases of unneeded commas and missing “The’s” (I would say “All of the” instead of “All the”) and the like (I won't bother you with most of those, I don't think they really matter), here are the only glaring things that jumped out at me as I flipped through (ignoring the stuff that was already mentioned):
_02.38_[2012.09.23_20.59.42 need space between “the” and “2004”.
_02.57_[2012.09.23_21.00.22 (and the following three pictures) “Effectively” is misspelled.
2012.09.23_21.01.39 I would change the phrasing of “All the new footage featuring now seriously dated CGI, which was added in 1997 has been removed” to “All of the new footage featuring severely dated CGI, which was added in 1997, has been removed.” “Now seriously dated CGI” sounds awkward. Also the case for t_07.10_[2012.09.23_21.11.31 and the subsequent shot. Also, in _07.10_[2012.09.23_21.11.31 it seems as though there’s some error in the picture – the starfield appears to be superimposed as a translucent layer over this particular shot. Also in _08.05_[2012.09.25_12.18.08…_10.52_[2012.09.25_12.27.09
_03.38_[2012.09.23_21.02.06 I would change the phrasing of “For DeEd-R, this shot was reconstructed using a custom matte of the stormtrooper sitting on the Dewback made from a 35mm scan and SE background and the slight movement of the pole the trooper is holding was restored. The camera motion had to be tracked” to “For DeEd-R this shot was reconstructed using a custom matte of the stormtrooper sitting on the Dewback made from a 35mm scan and the SE background. The slight movement of the pole the trooper is holding was restored and the camera motion had to be tracked.”
_03.47_[2012.09.23_21.02.26 “E” is SE needs to be capitalized.
04.06_[2012.09.23_21.03.03 “Due to lack of resolution” should be in parenthesis. Also in _06.24_[2012.09.23_21.09.24] and the subsequent five shots
_05.06_[2012.09.23_21.05.54 Comma needed following “were added in the SE”
_05.13_[2012.09.23_21.06.05] “GOUT” is not in quotation marks in any slide up to this point but this one… so it seems incongruent. Also the case in _06.58_[2012.09.23_21.10.44, _07.37_[2012.09.23_21.12.29]
t_05.19_[2012.09.23_21.06.18 denoise should be de-noise (I actually read it as den-wa at first, like a fancy French word, hahaha. Then I got a really idiotic blank look on my face and stared at the wall for a few seconds.)
_05.24_[2012.09.23_21.06.38 hand animated should be hand-animated as it is being used as an adjective.
05.39_[2012.09.23_21.07.05 (and following 9 pictures) Comma following “For the Blu-Ray release” shouldn’t be there.
_06.01_[2012.09.23_21.08.39 Lightsaber the first time the word is used and lightsabre the second time the word is used. Not sure if they’re both correct but to use two different spellings in a single picture seems odd.
_06.04_[2012.09.23_21.08.58 Comma following “In this shot” shouldn’t be there
06.52_[2012.09.23_21.10.33 “Under” is misspelled. Also, “hand animated” should be “hand-animated.”
_07.02_[2012.09.23_21.10.53 Comma needed following “cleaned up”.
_08.01_[2012.09.25_12.17.59 Instead of “, because” in the second sentence it would be better to say “due to the” with no comma. In the third sentence “so then I had to track” should be simply “then track”.
_08.09_[2012.09.25_12.18.19 Don’t need comma after ”shot” in the 3rd sentence and over-all should be overall. “However” is used as an aside in the same sentence so it needs a comma before and after itself (i.e., “, however, “). Frame by frame should be frame-by-frame. An “a” needs to be added after “In the end” in the last sentence and no comma is needed before “because”.
_08.43_[2012.09.25_12.19.41 Denoised should be de-noised. “Artefact” (I’m assuming you’re going for UK English here) is misspelled as “arefacts.” Also, the commas after “filter” and “artefacts” shouldn’t be there.
_09.07_[2012.09.25_12.21.31 and subsequent 10 shots: Comma in first sentence shouldn’t be there, a pause seems clunky to me.
_10.56_[2012.09.25_12.27.56 “Traffic” is misspelled.
_11.15_[2012.09.25_12.33.09 and following shot “starfield” is misspelled as “strafield”
_12.27_[2012.09.25_12.43.45 Wrong pic for the BD square?
12.38_[2012.09.25_12.44.33 “Separately” is misspelled (you have an extra l in there).
_14.40_[2012.09.25_12.55.53 “look” is misspelled “lokk”
_16.45_[2012.09.25_13.09.36 Commas needed so the sentence “In the 2011 Blu-Ray this shot which had bad framing in all previous versions was fixed” becomes “In the 2011 Blu-Ray this shot, which had bad framing in all previous versions, was fixed”
_18.01_[2012.09.25_13.13.51 “Their” in the second-to-last sentence is misspelled as “ther”
18.31_[2012.09.25_13.17.24 and subsequent 8 pictures “GOUT” is once again in quotation marks. This is fine of course but it’s inconsistent with the rest of the presentation. Also in 19.01_[2012.09.25_13.21.32 and its subsequent pic, and _19.06_[2012.09.25_13.22.12 and its next pic, also _19.12_[2012.09.25_13.22.32 and _19.15_[2012.09.25_13.22.59 and _19.23_[2012.09.25_13.23.58. Not sure if you want to change this type of thing but I thought I’d mention it for the Hell of it.
19.13_[2012.09.25_13.22.51 Over exposure needs to be over-exposure
19.42_[2012.09.25_13.26.47 I find the phrasing confusing in this opening sentence. It says “This shot was reconstructed using the Falcon a single 35mm frame scan and...” but perhaps would be better to say “This shot featuring the Falcon was reconstructed using a single 35mm frame scan and…”
19.45_[2012.09.25_13.27.05 “ships” is misspelled as “shis”. “GOUT” is also in quotation marks again – like I said not sure if you want to fix it just throwing it out there.
Anyway, great job man!