This is so, so elegant. Not only does it give the audience much-needed information in a sensible in-story way, it actually smooths things out with the dreadnought line. Really impressive, a huge value add.
As someone who hasn’t really seen the film since it left theaters, I noticed no seams. Couldn’t even really tell you what was AI or not.
Ooh, I nearly forgot. I also generated Kylo lines to replace “I’m going to find you and turn you to the dark side”. I think most people liked that, too. I believe it went something like: “My mother doesn’t sense the darkness in you. But I do.”
Found it: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1nPFZZrQmNqilvd4eZaXPgBeTZio6S1yg/view?usp=drivesdk
I could try to get it to whisper better. You’d also have to replace the line “I don’t wanna have to kill you.”
The first part more quiet: https://drive.google.com/file/d/10inxLCn6IcMfNwSuz6kghNZQe5yqESON/view?usp=sharing
Damn, that last one is good.
Wowww that sounds so great!
Here are all the quietest lines I could get stringed together: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o93h9fWix3XZyEyxh4tuMsDfaR2XiYIG/view?usp=sharing
Here’s how the line would go:
Kylo: “Do you still count the days since your parents left? Such pain in you. Such anger. My mother doesn’t see the darkness in you. Your friends don’t either. But I do. When I offer you my hand again, you’ll take it.”
Speaking of Kylo Ren lines… let’s maybe take another stab at Rey’s lineage reveal?
Because he saw what you would become. You don’t just have power; you have his power.
You’re his granddaughter.It’s always been there.
You are a Palpatine.
You are his granddaughter.My mother was the daughter of Vader. Your father was
the sona clone of the Emperor.
The Star Wars Saga:
I · II · III · IV · V · VI · VII · VIII · IX | Rogue One · Solo
What was first just a dream has become a frightening reality…
I’m not sure what the use of changing that first part would be. Now, that second bit there is how I originally had it in my novelization. But then I watched the director’s commentary on the film, which surprisingly changed my mind. Having them be reverse images of each other (daughter of Vader, son of the Emperor) makes their dyad more interesting. Using the term “clone” would break that parallel. But I suppose it might be worth it to explain a bit of her father’s backstory.
The other thing we have to keep in mind is that her father looks nothing like Palpatine in the flashbacks. And we definitely don’t want him to say “a not-so-similar-looking clone of the Emperor”. Or drop the word “standcast” with absolutely no explanation what the hell that is. Lol.
My thought was replacing, “You are a Palpatine” with “You are his Granddaughter” during the shot of Rey.
And then the original spot of that line would be used to help mesh better with her darkness in TFA and TLJ, with Kylo implying the darkness in her was genetic.
The Star Wars Saga:
I · II · III · IV · V · VI · VII · VIII · IX | Rogue One · Solo
What was first just a dream has become a frightening reality…
Alright, after about 50 generations I’ve narrowed Leia’s line down to these 3:
https://streamable.com/bk5i4q
And I’m particularly satisfied with the first result on this next one:
https://streamable.com/bkqdm9
I’m not sure what the use of changing that first part would be. Now, that second bit there is how I originally had it in my novelization. But then I watched the director’s commentary on the film, which surprisingly changed my mind. Having them be reverse images of each other (daughter of Vader, son of the Emperor) makes their dyad more interesting. Using the term “clone” would break that parallel. But I suppose it might be worth it to explain a bit of her father’s backstory.
The other thing we have to keep in mind is that her father looks nothing like Palpatine in the flashbacks. And we definitely don’t want him to say “a not-so-similar-looking clone of the Emperor”. Or drop the word “standcast” with absolutely no explanation what the hell that is. Lol.
May I propose the word offspring? That is to say he could be interpreted as being the son but that particular word leaves enough ambiguity that it still applies to being his strandcast.
Those are real nice, JJB. I’m content with them as well. And if you have or can generate those Kylo lines for their conversation on Pasaana, I think they sound great.
I’m going to axe changing “son” to anything else. The movie doesn’t even hint at any cloning going on there so I don’t want to inject any confusion. If I’m just watching the movies, I can avoid that particular headache.
As far as lengthening the granddaughter line or reveal, I think that’d be a nice way to finish Kylo’s thesis about proving to Rey who she is. I like it.
I know I’ve made some very poor decisions recently.
Weapon Line: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1NaOhk_jklhflnIMCoETqs2yEI6EKqGOh/view?usp=sharing
Either one of these for the dangerous line (I have no preference):
https://drive.google.com/file/d/1BhhbMiKlX59NXIOaOUp-ga_2zCo6vkHe/view?usp=sharing
https://drive.google.com/file/d/10UcGSsIea8z_l6T7X0YRZenucUQVp_3x/view?usp=sharing
And Hal, are you suggesting that I re-record all of Kylo’s lines there on Pasanna? Or just supply the ones that are new?
As far as lengthening the granddaughter line or reveal, I think that’d be a nice way to finish Kylo’s thesis about proving to Rey who she is. I like it.
Rey: Why would he want to kill a child?
Kylo: Because he saw what you would become. Don’t you see it? It’s always been there. Rey, you have his power.
(cuts to Rey)
Kylo: You… are his granddaughter.
(cuts back to Kylo)
Kylo: My mother was the daughter of Vader. Your father was the son of the Emperor.
The Star Wars Saga:
I · II · III · IV · V · VI · VII · VIII · IX | Rogue One · Solo
What was first just a dream has become a frightening reality…
Double post… oops!
The Star Wars Saga:
I · II · III · IV · V · VI · VII · VIII · IX | Rogue One · Solo
What was first just a dream has become a frightening reality…
Ah I see what we’re getting at now. I’d be willing to do all that once I get through our current checklist.
I believe all a good Rey line needed was a pinch of reverb to fit in: https://streamable.com/rex0nz
I don’t really feel that line works, it comes off as clunky exposition, why would she feel the need to explain what she’s doing at that moment? And more importantly, they’re trying to stay quiet and make no sudden moves, so it makes no sense for her to randomly yell about what she’s about to do, that would probably startle the beast and make it attack.
I feel it’s pretty obvious she learned that from studying the Jedi texts, it’s all she’s been doing in between the movies, she doesn’t really need to say it, and if she does she definitely shouldn’t say it at that moment.
Fair enough. My thinking was that she was responding to Poe’s desire to shoot the snake. As in, she’s clarifying why he shouldn’t shoot it. From the beginning, I wasn’t entirely sure why Rey didn’t tell Finn or Poe anything at all. Even something as simple as: “Hold this. I’ve got an idea.”
Could she whisper it?
I know I’ve made some very poor decisions recently.
Fair enough. My thinking was that she was responding to Poe’s desire to shoot the snake. As in, she’s clarifying why he shouldn’t shoot it.
Still, I think it feels too much like random exposition, like, why would Finn or Poe care that she learned something from the ancient Jedi texts? They never show much interest in the intricacies of her training. Just seems like something that is solely directed at the audience.
From the beginning, I wasn’t entirely sure why Rey didn’t tell Finn or Poe anything at all. Even something as simple as: “Hold this. I’ve got an idea.”
Rey is overall very distant in this movie, she’s constantly taking actions without bothering to explain things to anyone. It’s part of her struggle in the film. And in this case I think giving the saber to Finn and slowly approaching the serpent makes it pretty clear she’s going to try doing something, she doesn’t need to say “I’m going to try doing something”.
It is 100% on my list, Alex! Haha
I had no idea more was in the works for Ascendant, Hal. That’s fantastic! Do you have a proposed v3 changelist?
Jar Jar, those new lines sound incredible as always! I do wonder though if it sounds a little…technical? As if Poe were just reading off the Wookieepedia article for the Sith Destroyers. What if it’s a little less specific: “His followers have been hiding something for years - an enormous stockpile of star destroyers from the old empire, outfitted with new weapons and armor. He calls it the Final Order.”
Thank you very much lol! I honestly don’t mind TROS that much at all. Its just that thing that feels bleh.
I seriously can’t wait for these new versions to come out. Was hoping to copy V2 into a disc but I think I’ll wait and see what other versions bring!
Could she whisper it?
Burbin has won me over on this one, lol.
Plus, I don’t think I’ll be able to get something like that because all of the source material I have of her from the games she is practically yelling most of the time. In all my generations with the label “whisper” (which were most of them) she never actually did that.
EDIT: Also, here is another take of Leia saying Rey - https://drive.google.com/file/d/19g8jnA_45i0Kce2L4FqB5Ei-TZ2HhD4D/view?usp=sharing
I’m not sure what context this is going in so lmk if it needs to change and how.
It’d be for her first line of the movie, after Rey fails at contacting the Jedi of the past.
And I’ll nix the Rey line during the serpent scene.
I know I’ve made some very poor decisions recently.
I’m confident this should sound good: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1Jev1z9TWAaCgPcVHLtLN4reSrGc72htA/view?usp=sharing
Also, I’m still wondering about the Pasanna dialog. Did you just want the lines I’ve already generated, or are you planning on replacing all of Kylo’s dialog there like we did with Poe?