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The Force Awakens: Starlight (V1.1 Released!) — Page 23

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Wow, that’s some great work, NeverAr! It’d be sad to lose Han’s hilarious line “If I get any higher they’ll see us!”

Really looking forward to seeing the final product. 😃

My stance on revising fan edits.

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 (Edited)

Hal 9000 said:

Wow, that’s some great work, NeverAr! It’d be sad to lose Han’s hilarious line “If I get any higher they’ll see us!”

Well the impetus for the cuts in that scene was more to do with the time spent away from Rey than any humorous content; because her two escape attempts happened on either side of that scene I didn’t want the crash to be so involved that it sapped significant tension from the escape.

Hopefully the feeling of this scene is more akin to a car crash - violent, out of control, and over before anyone can really react.

You probably don’t recognize me because of the red arm.
Episode 9 Rewrite, The Starlight Project (Released!) and ANH Technicolor Project (Released!)

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Those Phasma lines work even better than I expected. I also like how you reused the female stormtrooper line for dialogue with Phasma. Now, it feels like she is actually doing something rather than aimlessly roaming the halls too.

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NeverarGreat said:

Sir Ridley said:

NeverarGreat said:

More work on removing the Death Star hologram from the planning scene:

https://vimeo.com/323037027

Password: fanedit

It’s not perfect, but if you’re not looking for the change I think it’s fairly seamless.

Nicely done. Do you think the lampshading of there being “another Death Star” isn’t needed?

That’s a part of it. Another thing was brought up by someone here (I forget who), saying that they originally thought that the Starkiller was built within a planet to save cost compared to the Death Star. When they then saw how the Starkiller’s weapon emitter alone was almost the size of the Death Star, it negated that bit of cleverness.

That got me to thinking about how we never saw the Death Star directly compared to the size of a planet in ANH. If it were shown in proportion to Alderaan (assuming it’s an Earth-sized planet), it would be laughably tiny in comparison:

Tiny Star

Even though the audience on some level understands that it’s the size of a very small moon, the way it is portrayed as large and imposing in the shot sells the threat.

Threat level high

So by removing comparisons to any object of reference, it’s easier to imagine the scale of the station to be whatever size makes the most sense for a person’s individual view of the First Order and their abilities.

A year ago I suggested to shrink the Death Star further in the hologram and Sir Ridley included this change in his plans for Ridley’s Edit, however, this is a much more elegant solution because it doesn’t require FX work and it cuts out the not-so-subtle “It’s another Death Star” line.

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 (Edited)

Indeed.

I’m struggling right now on the end of the movie. I’d like to move the final scene if possible, but there are limited options. The most promising to me is to place it after the interrogation:

https://vimeo.com/327124146
Password: fanedit

I tried including some dialogue from Kylo about the island, but it feels more powerful without dialogue. Also, should Rey hear Hux’s speech or should it transition without her waking up?

JEDIT: I’ve also tried to place the scene after Kylo witnesses the sun draining but before Rey tries to escape, yet the problem is simply that it feels too much like she’s actually on the island rather than in a dream. The costume is problematic as well. Really at this point I’m just interested in repurposing the music somewhere.

You probably don’t recognize me because of the red arm.
Episode 9 Rewrite, The Starlight Project (Released!) and ANH Technicolor Project (Released!)

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NeverarGreat said:

Indeed.

I’m struggling right now on the end of the movie. I’d like to move the final scene if possible, but there are limited options. The most promising to me is to place it after the interrogation:

https://vimeo.com/327124146
Password: fanedit

I tried including some dialogue from Kylo about the island, but it feels more powerful without dialogue. Also, should Rey hear Hux’s speech or should it transition without her waking up?

JEDIT: I’ve also tried to place the scene after Kylo witnesses the sun draining but before Rey tries to escape, yet the problem is simply that it feels too much like she’s actually on the island rather than in a dream. The costume is problematic as well. Really at this point I’m just interested in repurposing the music somewhere.

I like this edit, brings real depth into this dream sequence

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Legacyofajedi said:

NeverarGreat said:

Here’s an updated scene, with the return of the unused music and a still of the wall of days and the last shot of Rey as a stand-in for the island drawing. I like the idea you had RL about using the wall for the drawing, but it would still be fun to film an insert shot of that.

https://vimeo.com/316877939

Password: fanedit

OMG, Your a genius, i so love your work

The Wall of Days, OMG this is incredible, so cant wait to watch your finished version

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NeverarGreat said:

littlev87 said:

I think you should consider using transitions similar to this video for your dream sequences.

https://originaltrilogy.com/topic/The-Destruction-of-the-Jedi-Temple/id/63925/page/1#1270201

They really give a similar feeling to the “force back” when she first touches the saber.

I will, for sure. Although I’m not a big fan of the style, I can see how it might be effective in certain situations.

RL, I haven’t seen that movie, but it should probably be on the list!

Here’s a more polished version of the scene, with some improved transitions and an edit to the Hux/Snoke dialogue. The rearrangement of the Kylo/Snoke dialogue has been dialed back but still retains the main idea.

https://vimeo.com/318133232

Password: fanedit

Class once again

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22Popcorn86 said:

I sent you a PM in regards to my force awakens redux cut? BTW, you mentioned you found a link for my force awakens redux cut on a different site what site did you find it on?

Your Redux cut as had me in tears this evening , Wonderful edit 22

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EddieDean said:

Can she wake only after the weapon fires (which with yours as with Hal’s, comes after Han’s death)? A bit of artificial camera shake?

Not sure I understand this.

Also, random idea: What if Takonoda had evidence of habitation? I’m thinking some cities visible from space and in the distance in the establishing shots. I think it would convey that Han is taking our heroes into the Republic proper, a more civilized place than for example a cantina on Tatooine. The patrons of this place already feel less dangerous than the pirates they supposedly are. The subtitled dialogue between Finn and the pirates could suggest this as well, something like:

‘I was told you could get me to the outer rim’
‘You’d be safer here in the Republic.’

JEDIT: Giving some habitation to the planet would also make Rey’s running away more logical.

You probably don’t recognize me because of the red arm.
Episode 9 Rewrite, The Starlight Project (Released!) and ANH Technicolor Project (Released!)

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Wow, seamless. Really excellent execution. I may have missed this information earlier in the thread, but what is your reasoning for adding finn to the vision?

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It’s part of a larger idea where Rey decides to go with Finn instead of simply running into the woods. I’ve also removed her saying ‘Luke’ in response to Maz’s insistence that ‘someone’ could still come back. In this version it’s ambiguous as to whom Maz is talking about. Finally, I’d like to create a shot of the pirate ship to place as a POV for Rey when she stops in the woods to catch her breath.

You probably don’t recognize me because of the red arm.
Episode 9 Rewrite, The Starlight Project (Released!) and ANH Technicolor Project (Released!)

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 (Edited)

Oh no, I’m skipping around again…

This time right to the end, with another work in progress:

https://vimeo.com/329739033

Password: fanedit

So why not keep the Restructured version of the Hosnian Destruction? There are several issues with that version which this seeks to fix.

First, the break in action after Han’s death always felt weird to me, even when it was just cutting to Leia’s reaction, and the Starkiller Firing exacerbated the issue. In this version the Leia cutaway happens instead of the ‘Two Minute Warning’ scene in the theatrical.

Second, and related, there’s now no need for another Snoke scene or recharging of the weapon. Poe and company do all they can, but fail to destroy the Oscillator in time, no need for a vengeful final run.

Third, the weapon firing now has a real effect on the plot since it does in the Oscillator, which then creates a planetary ticking clock and ends the lightsaber fight.

Speaking of clocks, I hadn’t intended to make the ‘Two Minute Warning’ accurate to the second but it just so happened to work after cutting the cliffhanger shots in the duel.

You probably don’t recognize me because of the red arm.
Episode 9 Rewrite, The Starlight Project (Released!) and ANH Technicolor Project (Released!)

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I’ve been away for a little bit, but I’ve been keeping up with your posts and everything keeps looking good. I think a discussion can still be had regarding the Finn dream inclusion, but I think it fits it wonderfully and I like the idea of Rey not answering with ‘Luke’, and letting it be open to interpretation (Luke? Finn? Ben?). I’m wondering how you’ll make a POV shot of Finn’s ship though.

Honestly, I would say you should stick with this idea for the sole purpose of differentiating it from Restructured. Technically it still is the Restructured model, but with a twist. I will say that the one thing this addresses is the complaint of the extended Hosnian destruction kind of detracting from Han’s death scene. I’ve always seen it as a one-two gut punch sorta thing, but pushing the Hosnian destruction back allows for Han’s death to not have to share the spotlight, if that makes sense. I’m sure someone could describe this better than I could at the moment.

With that said, since the ‘Starkiller’ motif starts playing when Han touches Ben’s cheek and as he falls, will you replace the music with something else, or let it play out in relative silence before Chewbacca’s roar breaks it? What about when you cut to Leia’s reaction a little later? Will there be different music? New ambience?

I also like how Poe doesn’t necessarily blow up Starkiller now, but the damage he did triggers it once it fires. It doesn’t make destroying it feel so easy. Also having the Starkiller motif play over the Oscillator blowing up and the planet crumbling makes Starkiller feel that much more powerful, that its cannon is literally ripping the planet apart. And I think this works better than the drawn out Resistance reactions from Restructured in some other ways as well.

I do have a few nitpicks though. One thing I wonder about is how having Hosnian blow up right after Rey’s victory over Kylo, which is sort of the climax of the film (like Luke blowing up the Death Star in ANH), will affect the ‘emotional flow’ of the film. So now the audience is like, “Yaaaaay- oh, wait.” Does that make sense? Maybe we’ll still get that when they escape and Starkiller blows up?

I think there was a similar point of concern with Restructured, which was why having Starkiller target the Resistance Base afterward and then Poe stopping it was retained, right?

Now, if a goal was to escape with the final piece of the map though wink wink nudge nudge, it might maintain some semblance of victory. (Not trying to push that idea on you. The third act map idea might just be what I eventually add to the tapestry of TFA fan edits)

Some smaller nitpicks, I know you had to trim Kylo and Rey’s duel a little because shit starts crumbling around them, but the cut stood out to me and I wonder if there is a way to retain any more of it. Secondly, the wide shot of Rey laying on Finn feels like it lasts too long. I wonder if you could keep the shot of Rey turning off the saber and running into the woods, as well as having the music end sooner, could help not make that shot feel as dragged out. That’s just my own personal feeling though.

There a few issues here and there but I think this could work with just a little more polishing. Great work on this idea, man.

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RogueLeader said:

I’ve been away for a little bit, but I’ve been keeping up with your posts and everything keeps looking good. I think a discussion can still be had regarding the Finn dream inclusion, but I think it fits it wonderfully and I like the idea of Rey not answering with ‘Luke’, and letting it be open to interpretation (Luke? Finn? Ben?). I’m wondering how you’ll make a POV shot of Finn’s ship though.

That’s the real trick. I’ve been unable to find any decent shots of that pirate vessel from any other angle, so I would have to imagine what the front would look like, hand-paint it and place it within a photo of a forest clearing. Not impossible, just time consuming.

Honestly, I would say you should stick with this idea for the sole purpose of differentiating it from Restructured. Technically it still is the Restructured model, but with a twist. I will say that the one thing this addresses is the complaint of the extended Hosnian destruction kind of detracting from Han’s death scene. I’ve always seen it as a one-two gut punch sorta thing, but pushing the Hosnian destruction back allows for Han’s death to not have to share the spotlight, if that makes sense. I’m sure someone could describe this better than I could at the moment.

That’s definitely a big reason for this edit.

With that said, since the ‘Starkiller’ motif starts playing when Han touches Ben’s cheek and as he falls, will you replace the music with something else, or let it play out in relative silence before Chewbacca’s roar breaks it? What about when you cut to Leia’s reaction a little later? Will there be different music? New ambience?

It actually works fairly well to leave a few notes of the Starkiller theme and cut straight from the wide aerial shot to Chewie’s roar. It’s an immediate reaction in keeping with that character.

I also like how Poe doesn’t necessarily blow up Starkiller now, but the damage he did triggers it once it fires. It doesn’t make destroying it feel so easy. Also having the Starkiller motif play over the Oscillator blowing up and the planet crumbling makes Starkiller feel that much more powerful, that its cannon is literally ripping the planet apart. And I think this works better than the drawn out Resistance reactions from Restructured in some other ways as well.

I do have a few nitpicks though. One thing I wonder about is how having Hosnian blow up right after Rey’s victory over Kylo, which is sort of the climax of the film (like Luke blowing up the Death Star in ANH), will affect the ‘emotional flow’ of the film. So now the audience is like, “Yaaaaay- oh, wait.” Does that make sense? Maybe we’ll still get that when they escape and Starkiller blows up?

Actually, I think it would be interesting to cast Rey as more of a Darksider in this moment of brutality, whether that requires a music change or something else. But if the audience feels like Rey is going down a dark path here instead of righteously smiting her enemy, the shift to the Starkiller firing would make a lot more tonal sense.

I think there was a similar point of concern with Restructured, which was why having Starkiller target the Resistance Base afterward and then Poe stopping it was retained, right?

I think that was retained solely because of concerns that Poe would be acting out of vengeance, since the System had already been destroyed.

Now, if a goal was to escape with the final piece of the map though wink wink nudge nudge, it might maintain some semblance of victory. (Not trying to push that idea on you. The third act map idea might just be what I eventually add to the tapestry of TFA fan edits)

I really like that idea, and it might be something I include if the idea of Rey’s map vision falls apart.

Some smaller nitpicks, I know you had to trim Kylo and Rey’s duel a little because shit starts crumbling around them, but the cut stood out to me and I wonder if there is a way to retain any more of it. Secondly, the wide shot of Rey laying on Finn feels like it lasts too long. I wonder if you could keep the shot of Rey turning off the saber and running into the woods, as well as having the music end sooner, could help not make that shot feel as dragged out. That’s just my own personal feeling though.

Good points. I cut the closeup of Rey and her deactivating the saber/running into the woods because it felt weird with the music, which seems to require wide shots. The final wideshot of the dark woods is slowed down to something like 30 percent, which I agree is too slow, but I really wanted to linger on the shot and communicate that this is where Rey is willing to die.

There a few issues here and there but I think this could work with just a little more polishing. Great work on this idea, man.

Thanks! This was all sorted out in literally one day, so there’s a lot more polishing to do. 😃

You probably don’t recognize me because of the red arm.
Episode 9 Rewrite, The Starlight Project (Released!) and ANH Technicolor Project (Released!)

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 (Edited)

So the idea of Rey seeing the full map in her Force vision is something I’ve been hesitant to actually implement, first because it would require a fair bit of effects work, and second because it effectively removes R2’s only contribution in the movie. The trouble is that Rey has nothing to do with piecing the map together, rendering her quite passive in her own story.

Thinking about it some more, I realized that there might be a way to fix Rey’s passivity as well as keep R2’s contribution, considering Rey has seen R2 in her vision:

https://vimeo.com/330166072

Password: fanedit

For this concept, I would revert back to the theatrical version of the first R2 scene and cut the second one as shown here. What appeals to me the most about this as opposed to the map vision is that Rey doesn’t use an impressive Force power to find Luke; rather the problem is solved simply by her attention to and care for the most humble characters of the story.

You probably don’t recognize me because of the red arm.
Episode 9 Rewrite, The Starlight Project (Released!) and ANH Technicolor Project (Released!)

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I cannot wait till this is done, all the time youve put into this is absolutely insane! The finished product is gonna feel amazing after watching!