The Dream of the Giant Fractal Woodlouse. — Page 17

Finally — a dream I call recall enough details from to describe in detail. Haven’t had one of those in a long while.

I was sitting in my 7th grade classroom, watching an episode from a new season of Friends. The episode was strange in that it wasn’t comedic at all; the tone was dead-serious, and the plot very bizarre; Monica was experiencing some weird Twilight Zone scenario where the world around her was transforming into one straight from a soap opera; even the look changed halfway through from a modern HD digital look to a worn-out, hazy, shot-on-video look. And David Arquette was the guest star.

Taking a break from the episode, I stepped out of the classroom, and found myself outside in my front yard. I wandered under a tree or into a field (or both at different times), where these tiny, mite-sized black widow spiders began swarming over me. They began feeding off of me, which started leaving me giddy and light-headed. After a minute or two, I returned back inside the classroom to continue watching Friends. I repeated this scenario several times, taking a break from the TV to go outside, allowing evermore spiders to feed off me. And art was imitating life; on Friends, Monica & co. were going outdoors, where they, too, were serving as smorgasbord to tiny mite-sized black widows.

In the end, everyone — myself included — were left desiccated husks drained dry of all fluids. I think I remained alive in this state.

suspiciouscoffee said:

My dream of last night can be summarized as follows:

*nervous laughter* what the fuck?

So your dream was the first few seconds of this tune?

I had a dream I was Jerry Cantrell. It was the mid '90s, and Layne Staley and I were writing a song together about hatred for neighbours.

During the writing process, we both realized we had to incorporate a famous Hollywood starlet into the song’s narrative. Charlie Sheen was there, and he suggested an obscure actress from the Golden Age of Hollywood. We decided the actress had to be both young and contemporary, so we didn’t run with his suggestion. We ended up choosing Denise Richards.

I recall the first few lines of that stanza:

Denise Richards lives next door to me

Looking sweet and pretty as can be

I forget the remaining lines. Essentially, the stanza was about the narrator realizing he hated Denise Richards 'cause she was a neighbour, too.

As we were finishing the song, Staley offered this as the closing line: “No singing, just a hum.” There was actually a bit more to the line than that, but at that point, I have run out of fresh pages in the notebook I was writing in, and my OCD wouldn’t allow me to jot the line down on a page with even a minimum of writing on. When I finally did find an unmarred page, I asked Staley to recite the line again, since I had forgotten the extra bits, but he was too far into a heroin-induced delirium to care anymore.

I had a dream that a grown up Bart Simpson fell in love with a green-haired Allison Taylor. After they were married and a daughter followed, wife (and possibly daughter) were murdered by gangsters and/or a fallen angel. Bart then took to the bottle pretty hard and became a drunken souse.

DuracellEnergizer said:

I had a dream that a grown up Bart Simpson fell in love with a green-haired Allison Taylor. After they were married and a daughter followed, wife (and possibly daughter) were murdered by gangsters and/or a fallen angel. Bart then took to the bottle pretty hard and became a drunken souse.

suspiciouscoffee said:

Solo came out and I was watching it. It was weird. This dream version of Solo had random cuts to Obi-Wan (McGregor) on Tattoine being a drunk perv that owed people money. I guess ROTS really messed him up for a few years.

Anyway, the actual Solo parts involved Han accidentally joing a rebellion (not the rebellion, just a small group on one planet) until some Imperials found their base and they had to pass it off as a bar, or something. Then it got really weird and Maggie Simpson appeared as a spy who was supposed to singlehandedly destroy the Imperial forces on this planet.

LuckyGungan2001 said:

I had a dream that my family went out to see the new Avengers, and at the end there was a trailer for the next movie, and for some reason my dad decided to go and see it as soon as we walked out of the theatre (I dunno why it was already released). For whatever reason he wanted to watch it in the safety of his car, but both our car and a rental we had were parked a few floors above the theatre, and instead of driving down a ramp, my dad decided to just drive the cars off a ledge and crash into the floor beneath us. At that point I realised it was unrealistic for any of this to be happening, so I woke up.

That’s hilarious.

I dreamt I had a child, a baby girl. The mother was nowhere to be found, so I gave her to some cats to nurse. The cat’s milk had a mutagenic effect on the child, 'cause she developed cat-like ears and black fur over her body. I didn’t mind having a cat-person for a daughter, though; I was just happy to be a father.

I met John Hurt in the school hallway. He was standing amongst other people, so I asked for and obtained an autograph on a post-it note. He told me his full name was Sir John William Hurt. We kept talking as we headed outside. In the stairway, he asked me what I call him, and I said Sir John William Hurt (although IRL, his name is Sir John Vincent Hurt, but I didn’t know that at the time). He said just John Hurt was okay, but I insisted, stating that I called him that because I looked up to him. We separated. I think he continued downstairs while I headed out the door.

In the parking lot, there was a sign saying no buses June 16. I started panicking, whining to everyone else there about how I had no way of getting home. Then I somehow got to taking turns trying to draw something in a Hyrule Historia with
a few people. They were trying to show me how to do it right, but I was only getting worse. Someone passing by closed the book wrong, folding up the page. I hastily reopened it and made my way to the page to fix it. Someone tried to sit down beside me and I accidentally discouraged them, so when their friend tried to sit there I encouraged them to make up for it. Meanwhile, my friends grew tired of trying to instruct me in drawing, as I desperately tried to keep their attention.

Now I was in a car with some others. I needed a ride home so I got one. Since they didn’t want to go out of their way, I told them to drop me off near my grandparents’ house. As we got to an intersection I asked if we were turning right. They didn’t answer, so I told them to drop me off here. They didn’t, and continued onto the highway. I asked if they were turning around and they said no. I asked to be dropped off by the highway. I said I had told them to drop me off earlier, and that we were now (somehow) just as far from my destination as when we started.

They pulled over and we decided to have them U-turn onto the railway tracks to bring me closer to my destination. I knew it was illegal, but for some reason there was a lady acting as a traffic cop to tell us when the train was coming. She was located beside the tracks at a point where they temporarily swerve away. We passed in front of her where there were no tracks, as she didn’t warn us of any oncoming trains.

We continued along the tracks, which were once more in a straight line, though we were zigzagging to avoid speed bumps. The driver didn’t want to hit them, insisting that train speed bumps are too intense for cars. I ignored him and (somehow) steered us over a few. We approached the turn into my grandparents’ neighborhood when suddenly a massive car (perhaps a Hummer) appear from around the bend going the opposite direction. We swerved left and I jumped out of the car. I climbed onto the leaf tunnel that covered the road and tried to jump through it, but it had grating that stopped me. Hence I climbed down directly onto the road (something which now strikes me as remarkably dangerous) and ran across the bend.

There was a tiny blue car with a rounded pickup-style trunk instead of backseats, though it only had room for one person. I knew they were somehow waiting for the driver of the hummer to jump in and make a getaway. For some reason, I hopped in, and ducked with my hands on my head, hoping they would notice me and drive off without noticing I wasn’t their collaborator. They started driving off, but quickly turned around. I realised they had noticed I was someone else and quickly got out and ran. I figured I was close enough to my destination to walk. By now aware this was a dream, I thought of how much more adrenaline pumping action could of taken place, as I tried to get out of the minicar. I would probably have to wait for them to stop at a traffic light.

I had quite the complicated dream this morning. Most of the details have escaped me, but here’s what I recall:

I was a kid again, (at least, I think I was), and me and the other children in my class had taken a field trip to some rural farm house while had lain abandoned since the '90s. The house was very strange; the front door and doggy door were in the shape of a human and dog, respectively, and there was this general atmosphere of foreboding localized over the property even though the weather was bright and clear.

I got separated from my classmates while exploring inside. That’s when I found a pantry door which had been nailed shut since the former occupant’s disappearance. I got the door open, and that’s when the former occupant — the undead, dessicated corpse of a rather rotund woman — lurched out of the pantry, arms outstretched for my throat. I got a chainsaw and sawed her arms off, but that didn’t stop her; prehensile tentacles sprang from her arm stumps and ensnared me. Somehow, I managed to maneuver the chainsaw into her mouth and promptly rammed it down her throat. That put an end to her right-quick.

Don’t listen to him. It’s perfectly natural and fine but it’s not public forum sharing material.

Possessed said:

Don’t listen to him. It’s perfectly natural and fine but it’s not public forum sharing material.

yeah, what possesser said