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RogueLeader

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11-Jun-2015
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21-Nov-2017
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Post
#1132503
Topic
RogueLeader's Rogue One Edit
Time

jarbear said:

I think its your phone Ash, the ambient noise is there.

The first clip is great, really good editing and like the narrative based on your edit.

I will say I do agree with all what Chainsawash has said on his previous posts. I appreciate you want the air time for Saw, but it would be better to take out those scenes … especially the Gullett scene…

Lastly, having K2 silent with the bag is genius. I like it better this way!

Thanks for the input! And I’m glad you like the K2 change!

Yeah, and it seems there’s no redemption with the Bor Gullet scene. The next cut I’ll probably remove those scenes, and if people are willing to watch the first 20-30 minutes, see how it flows.

Post
#1131677
Topic
RogueLeader's Rogue One Edit
Time

ChainsawAsh said:

Personally, I’d cut all of Saw and Bodhi’s scenes before Jyn and Cassian get to Saw’s group. This way you’d meet Saw with Jyn (you can take the shot of Saw’s legs walking from the scene where he meets Bodhi in the original version to give his meeting with Jyn a more “character introduction” feel) and Bodhi with Cassian. You can tone Bodhi’s post-Bor Gullet confusion down too.

(I would definitely cut Artoo and Threepio and Ponda Baba and Evazan’s cameos, though.)

That is a good idea as well. I think the scene is meant to show how Saw has sort of gone off the deep end, but I guess we still see that briefly when he speaks to Jyn. Even though I would hate to lose more screen time for Riz Ahmed and Forest Whittaker, it wouldn’t hurt to at least try it out and see how it feels without it.

And if enough people think I should remove the cameos I might. They’re easy enough to get rid of!

HerekittykittyX said:

Two things I would add to this take out the weird squid scene and the first clip cuts way to quickly it needs to have an audio fade or a wipe transition

Thanks for the input! I might take out the squid scene. I wonder if it would help if I made a before and after to help show how it differs from the original version at least. Also, I didn’t change how the first clip cuts away, that is how it is in the original, if you are referring to the briefing room scene.

ChainsawAsh said:

Clips look pretty damn good! There’s some dead air in the “doesn’t sound so bad” line removal that should be filled with ambient environmental audio, though, and there’s some more blending needed to smooth out the audio on some of the lines in the briefing scene. Other than that, it all looks and sounds great!

I listened to that part again and I didn’t hear any dead air, I have ambience running throughout. You may have misheard it or maybe I’m missing it! If you wouldn’t care to double check I would appreciate it. You should hear that locust-like sound all the way through.

Yeah I agree. I think I have smoothed out Mon Mothma’s “and return him to the Senate” a bit more than it is in the clip now. It is definitely a challenge because of how quickly they talk. Thanks for the input!

I think in this edit they know Galen is building the weapon, but they don’t know that Galen sent Bodhi.

This is correct, thank you for clarifying!

DigMod said:

Oops,looks like I read it wrong.

It was a lot to read so it was easy enough to miss!

This post has been edited.

Post
#1131333
Topic
RogueLeader's Rogue One Edit
Time

Here are two clips from the edit. The first is the Yavin IV briefing room scene where they tell Jyn the plan. Now, the plan is simply to rescue the pilot and bring him to the Alliance. They’re unaware that Galen actually sent the pilot.
https://vimeo.com/243094840
password: fanedit

The second clip is the first few minutes of Jedha in the film. The first half shows the removal of K2SO’s line “That doesn’t sound so bad to me.” It isn’t a bad line, but because we are expecting a quippy line, the scene might actually play funnier if he does the unexpected and says nothing. They originally showed this scene last year at Star Wars Celebration without sound, and I think it played funnier with the audience.
The second half is Bodhi and Saw’s first scene in the film, followed by the trimmed Bor Gullet scene.
https://vimeo.com/243197525
password: fanedit

This post has been edited.

Post
#1130311
Topic
RogueLeader's Rogue One Edit
Time

Hey everyone! Below is a ridiculously long post about an edit of Rogue One I have been working on. For those of you who don’t have the time to read it all, here are my three major goals of this edit:

  1. Make the first act less jumpy.
  2. Make Jyn a more active protagonist.
  3. Save Galen’s message as a reveal.
  • I’ve also made personal changes here and there.

If you’d like to check it out and give some feedback, feel free to pm me.


I liked Rogue One, but I definitely think that the lack of characterization and other common criticisms were justified. Without deleted scenes, you can only do so much, but I wanted to see what can be done with what we were given.

I have been sitting on my own edit of the film since August, but I finally made the time to sit down and write this post.

I think the biggest criticism of the film was its lack of character development. This falls hard on Jyn, especially. An informative video essay by Lessons From the Screenplay highlights the faults in the two newest Star Wars films’ central protagonists, Rey and Jyn. While Rey is another topic, Michael delves into Jyn’s character and describes her as a passive protagonist, meaning Jyn rarely makes decisions that have any influence on the story as a whole. Link to video below.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gsIQa7sH5_Y&t=638s

A few months ago I also stumbled across a Tor article by Max Gladstone titled “How to Fix Rogue One with the Least Amount of Effort”. While some of his changes are impossible to make, he had some ideas that I thought could be doable. Please give it a read when you can; he explains his own ideas much more elegantly than I could.

https://www.tor.com/2017/01/05/least-effort-fixes-for-rogue-one/comment-page-1/

So, after reading these criticisms, along with many others on here and other websites, I decided to work on an edit with these major goals.

  1. Make the first act less jumpy.
  2. Make Jyn a more active protagonist.
  3. Save Galen’s message as a reveal.

ACT I

Even when I saw it in theaters, I felt that the first act jumped around too much. In this version, I have removed the planet title cards (ala DigMod) to possibly help alleviate information overload, and I have also completely removed Bodhi’s first scene. There’s no information that doesn’t get repeated in his next scene with Saw, and I also think his second scene is a more interesting way to introduce him. And this way, we don’t go to Jedha until Jyn and Cassian do.

In the first act, I have also changed the nature of their mission. Their objective is to convince Saw Gerrera to just give them the Imperial pilot, who has information regarding a secret weapon that the Empire is building, and bring him back to Yavin. When Jyn asks what this has to do with her father, Cassian reveals that they believe Galen is building a weapon that has the power to destroy entire planets, rather than saying the Emperor is building a weapon. The Rebels don’t know Galen has anything to do with the pilot and the message.

I thought it was strange that the Rebels were so eager to kill Galen if they knew that he sent this message. Now, their motivation to kill him is a little more understandable because they still have reason to believe Galen is loyal to the Empire. This change also helps simplify their mission. Find Saw and get the pilot.

This also ties in with another big change in this edit: trying to make Jyn a more active protagonist.

There’s a few more moments I’ve altered where Jyn’s actions have more of an influence on the story.

When Jyn saves the little girl on Jedha, we now see that Chirrut senses her act of selflessness from nearby, which explains why Chirrut returns the favor a few minutes later. In the original cut, I felt her saving the girl was an cheap way to show that Jyn was a “good person”, and I had trouble understanding why Chirrut would feel the need to save Jyn and Cassian just because he’s “no friend of the Empire”. Now, tying these two moments together helps give Jyn’s actions consequence and helps explain Chirrut and Jyn’s connection. It also parallels Cassian’s actions in the same scene resulting in their capture by Saw’s rebels.

ACT II

I’ve also changed the U-Wing scene after they escape Jedha. As Max points out in his article, Jyn and Cassian’s argument about what to do next seems strange since they are going to Eadu regardless, but since I’ve also changed the mission and left Galen’s involvement as a reveal, at this point in the story Cassian would want to return to Yavin IV with the pilot. Now, I’ve rearranged this scene so Jyn makes the argument to extract her father instead (since Bodhi knows his location). So Cassian contacts the Alliance, they give them the green light, but they think Galen is too much of a risk, so they order Cassian to kill him instead. Max goes into more detail about why this change can work, but most importantly, I think this gives Jyn another moment where she makes active decisions within the story, because she alters the direction of the plot.

A common complaint I hear about the Eadu segment of the film is that it has no real lasting impact on the story. It lets Jyn have one final moment with her father, but that’s about it. I’ve tried to change this by having the last thing Galen says to Jyn be, “Jyn, I have to tell you… star… dust…”. There is not much context for why he says that at this point of the story, but I’m hoping with this, and by cutting two or three of the other Stardust name drops, it helps imply that he was trying to tell Jyn that the project codename was Stardust. Yes, Jyn figures it out anyway in the original cut, but maybe someone who hasn’t seen Rogue One, or hasn’t seen it in a long time, would mentally tie these moments together. This change brings some lasting value to their mission on Eadu, even if it was only a little bit.

On their way back to Yavin, I’ve also removed a few lines to Jyn and Cassian’s argument, namely, the last two. Now, the argument ends with Cassian saying, “You’re not the only one who’s lost everything. Some of us just decided to do something about it.”

Before, I thought the ending of the conversation felt childish and nothing was gained from it. Now, we, and Jyn, are left to ponder Cassian’s final words before he walks off. At this moment, Jyn could leave the Alliance after this betrayal, or she could “do something about it” like Cassian suggests. So instead of giving up on the rebellion, like many thought she would have done in this situation, she decides to try and convince the Rebellion to go to Scarif so her father didn’t die in vain.

Originally in Jyn’s speech scene, it didn’t seem like her speech had any real impact on the story. The rebels refuse to go, and Cassian recruits a team for the mission on his own anyway. In this version, though, I’ve added Cassian to this scene. While I don’t think this change is the most seamless, since I had to move shots of him from the first briefing scene to this scene, even though it is a different part of the base, I think the change is worth it. And when I cut to him, I’ve lowered the volume of the discussion to help imply that he’s listening in from a distant, off-camera corner. When Jyn gives the same line he said to her earlier, “Rebellions are built on hope.” Cassian gives a little grin, which is an unused shot that I took from one of the trailers. After Mon Mothma says they can’t go, and some of the rebels are sitting there, looking defeated, one of the rebels looks over at Cassian, who then gives him a knowing look. Coincidentally, this rebel turns out to be one of the guys that is standing right behind Cassian in the next scene, hopefully implying that Jyn’s speech motivated them to join this new mission.

ACT III

I’ve pretty much done nothing to the final act of the film; most people seem to enjoy it as is. But I do think it has a few issues. My biggest gripe though is regarding why they decided to transmit the plans instead of escaping with them if they have to take down the shield gate either way? I just don’t understand why they changed their plan at this moment, when they learn the shield gate has been closed. It seems like the transmitting option would only be chosen after their means of escape was gone.

And then when they get Bodhi to contact the Alliance and tell them to take out the shield gate, they were already trying to do just that. So his, Chirrut’s and Baze’s deaths feel almost unnecessary.

There are three ways to tackle these problems that I’ve considered:

  1. Alter some dialogue.
    K2: They’ve closed the shield gate.
    Jyn: We’re trapped?
    Cassian nods
    K2: They have to take out that shield gate.

Change Cassian/Bodhi lines accordingly.
Their plan is still to escape first, but when their way out is blocked by troopers, K2 tells them to climb up the tower and transmit the plans instead. You can write off the rest by assuming Raddus just isn’t focused on the shield until Bodhi contacts him, so changing that is not necessary.

  1. Do 1, plus readjust space battle so they don’t start probing shield gate until after Bodhi contacts Raddus.

  2. Readjust battle so Raddus doesn’t attack shield until after Bodhi contacts them, and rearrange deaths so K2 doesn’t tell them transmit the plans with his dying words until Bodhi has been killed and their means of escape gone. This also means that Chirrut and Baze have to die before K2 as well. You could have Cassian check up on Bodhi as he blows up, then have a reaction shot of him and Jyn when they only hear static through the commlink. Now they know they’re stuck there.

While I think 3 would be the strongest change, I think it would be very difficult to make it seamless, partly due to the music underlaying most of the third act as well as all of the changes being more noticeable.

I like to think that the changes in the first two acts would be subtle enough that someone who has not watched the movie in a long time might not notice what has changed. They might notice something is different, but not exactly what. With this, I do feel like the #3 option would be pretty obvious and maybe against what I’m trying to achieve.

I’m still floating ideas around. If anyone has any thoughts, ideas or opinions on the third act please share them. As of now, I’ve only removed Cassian’s line when informing Bodhi of the transmitting plan “it’s the only way we’re getting them out of here”. Even though he probably means they can only get the plans out by destroying the shield gate, it removes the possible assumption that he means they can only get the plans out by transmitting the plans to the fleet. As of now, I’m just assuming that once the fleet arrives, K2 realizes that transmitting the plans successfully is more likely than escaping with them physically, and the group goes along with that plan, even if it means risking their own escape. I know I’m overthinking this.

MISCELLANEOUS

These are the main changes I have made. I’ve had to make minor cuts/changes here and there to maintain the objectives of the edit. I have also made some minor cuts here and there unrelated to the main objectives as well. (I may have forgotten a thing or two).

  • Slightly darkened the Rogue One title card.

  • I’ve trimmed the Bor Gullet scene. I know many people don’t like Bor Gullet, but I do think the scene serves a purpose. I think the reason people didn’t like it is because it doesn’t really affect Bodhi in the way Saw implies. Sure, he acts weird for a scene, but he didn’t “lose his mind”. By simply removing that line, I think the focus now of the scene is to show how far Saw has gone off the deep end. I’ve also darkened the scene as well in order to keep it a little more eerie and hide the CGI-ness of the creature.

  • I’ve kept the Ponda Baba and Evazan cameo, but I removed the last shot of them that just sits there for several seconds. I think the last shot was gratuitous, screaming, “Do you recognize them yet?!?!” By just cutting out that last shot, I think it becomes more like an easy-to-miss easter egg rather than a blatant nostalgic callback. It doesn’t call as much attention to them anymore.

  • I removed K2’s line, “That doesn’t sound so bad to me” from his first Jedha scene. Just to see him silently dropping Jyn’s bag might be funnier considering we’re already used to him being the droid that says funny things.

  • I ever so slightly trimmed the scene of Jyn kicking Stormtrooper ass. I didn’t cut any of her shots, but instead I trimmed Cassian’s reaction. Both Rogue One and TFA had a moment where a guy reacts with surprise when a girl actually knows how to fight and doesn’t need help. I don’t think this should be a surprising thing in the Star Wars universe. So Cassian simply turns around and sees she’s handling it. No surprised look.

  • I’ve also lovingly borrowed two ideas from Digital Modification, where he removes Chirrut’s line, “Is your foot alright?” and implements the continuous Baze firing shot from the Jeddha scene from his own edit, Rise of the Rebellion. I think he makes a lot of great changes, which some I would be interested in implementing with his blessing, like his color corrected scenes of Tarkin and Leia.

  • Shortened Bodhi’s struggle to remember himself in prison cell.

  • Cut Saw’s line “I will run no longer”. Another major complaint was Saw just giving up on life and not going with Jyn and company as Jeddha was being destroyed. For a man who has fought oppression his entire adult life, how could he just give up so easily? I think a simple answer why is because he literally can’t run away. He’s encased in a large metal suit and has two ill-fitting robotic legs, so he would only slow them down. So all I did was remove the line. Now, he is not necessarily staying because he wants to, and I like to think that fresh viewers would connect the dots and assume that he’s too slow and doesn’t want to risk slowing down Jyn.

  • Cut Bodhi first saying “Rogue?” unconvincingly to the Rebel flight dispatcher.

  • Flipped shot of stolen imperial shutting flying through hyperspace to Scarif in order to maintain left to right movement that is continued in next shot.

  • I didn’t remove the R2 and 3PO cameo in my current version, but I’m on the fence about it. I did change 3PO’s line to, “Scarif? WE’RE going to Scarif?..” to help alleviate the almost-plot hole and maintain the cameo.

  • I began the fade to white slightly earlier when Jyn and Cassian die in order to hide Cassian opening his eyes at the last second.

  • And to reiterate, removed all of the title cards. I think they are partly to blame for the jumpy feeling of the first act, overloading us with info. But I’ve considered keeping them just because their removal/cropping might feel obvious to some. Would love some thoughts on this. Might keep them to keep it different enough from DigMod’s.

Well, sorry for the long post. I’ve been sitting on these ideas for awhile and decided to see if they could work. I wanted to post a breakdown of my ideas here though just so I could get some thoughts from you all. If any of you would like to view the current version of this edit just pm me.

Any feedback/ideas that could help me with this edit would be greatly appreciated!

This post has been edited.

Post
#1111356
Topic
ESB and ROTJ Wishlist
Time

nhoj3, solid analysis. I’m sure many others have broken down the plan in a similar way. I also came to a similar conclusion when I first started thinking about fanediting ROTJ. After some time I tried to think of a simpler solution that would require less changes, since even this multiple back-up plan theory stills seems overly complicated. But after some time, I think that maybe Luke’s plan was to get to the Sarlacc all along, and to get as much back-up there for the escape as possible.

How does this work? It works under the assumption that Lando has learned the ins-and-outs of Jabba’s palace since he has been undercover. Maybe Lando came to the conclusion that escaping the palace was almost impossible, and Jabba would be unwilling to bargain. Jabba himself is practically untouchable, but one of the few times Jabba leaves his palace with only a fraction of his guards is when he goes to the Pit of Carkoon for executions. So, instead of someone having to escape the heavily fortified palace, Jabba literally takes prisoners out of his fortress and practically hands them a getaway vehicle (the skiffs).

With this in mind, things can start to make more sense. Luke “gifted” the droids to Jabba in order to get them conveniently placed jobs that get them on the inside (maybe Lando sabotaged the previous barge droid and translator). Chewbacca was brought in as extra muscle for the sail barge escape and as a means for Leia to get in. Leia’s mission was to get Han out of the carbonite, but she went in knowing that actual escape was unlikely. I don’t think they planned for Leia to be made into a slave girl, but Leia did make it work in the end. Bottomline, Han had to be let out, otherwise he would be left frozen in the palace while everyone else went to the Sarlacc to be killed.

And if you think about it, Lando could have let Han out himself, but actually getting out of the palace was pretty much impossible, and they needed as much back-up as possible for the sail barge escape, which I think was why Leia and Chewie were brought into it. And with Lando compromised, they wouldn’t have anyone on the inside to make sure that all the pieces were where they needed to be.

Then it comes down to Luke. Luke’s job would be to take out the Rancor, the only other man-eating creature keeping them from the Sarlacc (and their escape). I think Lando obviously would have told Luke about the trap floor, which makes me think falling into the Rancor Pit was intentional. Once that inital means of execution was out of the way, the only thing left to satisfy Jabba’s well-known ego was to kill his enemies with the Sarlacc. Everything points to it; R2, Chewie and Luke seem confident the whole time, R2 is exactly where he needs to be with the lightsaber, and everybody is nodding their heads at each other like this is exactly where they wanted to be. Maybe they just didn’t tell 3PO so they could add an air of authenticity to the situation. They can’t all be cool, calm and collected.

And I think there would only need to be minimal changes to help this plan be clearer.

  • I would rather remove as little footage as possible, but when Luke is in the Rancor Pit, you could cut a shot or two of him desperately trying to get out through the door. If he needs to kill the Rancor, he shouldn’t be trying to escape just yet. So show him running across the pit, cut to the Rancor turning around, then cut back to Luke looking for the gate switch.

  • Another change that could help would be to add/alter a line from Jabba. For example, when Leia and Han get caught by Jabba, he says something before Han starts trying to talk his way out of it (like he always does, EVERY TIME), but there are no subtitles there. Maybe Jabba could say something about how escaping his palace is impossible, or how they never would have gotten past all of his guards, or how no one leaves his palace unless he allows it, etc. There may be a better place to put this kind of line, but a line like this could help foreshadow or hint to the plan.

  • A third, not completely necessary change would be to add more guards throughout his palace.

Personally, I’ve accepted this as their plan and I think the movie already works pretty well as is with that in mind. The main thing that sticks out to me is Luke trying to get out of the Rancor Pit, but one could probably rationalize that somehow. These changes might help make that plan clearer if Adywan or another editor felt the need to clarify the plan.

Sorry for the long post, just thought I would put this idea out there while it was on topic.

TL;DR The Han Rescue Plan was to get to the Sarlacc Pit. It was the easiest way to get everyone out of the palace, away from the majority of Jabba’s guards, and to get a free escape vehicle.

This post has been edited.

Post
#1110246
Topic
TFA: A Gentle Restructure
Time

Like NeverarGreat suggested, I think “The Starkiller Edit” is clean and concise. It makes it clear that the changes in this version revolve around the use of Starkiller Base in the film.
I definitely think Starkiller Base was one of the biggest gripes people had with the movie, so just seeing that subtitle would immediately interest people.

Post
#1105236
Topic
Revenge of the Sith (The New Canon Cut)
Time

NFB, I really enjoyed your rough cut back in April and I do think it has the potential to be one of the most influential edits of Revenge of the Sith out there. I wanted to ask, have you considered just ending that Vader transformation scene with the breathing, or when he says, “Yes, Master” but keeping the other ending scenes? I feel like if you end the movie on his breathing, it will feel like something is missing. Even though the movie is about Anakin’s fall, I do think that Obi-Wan is almost as important if not equally, so cutting his last scenes could feel like we don’t get much of a conclusion to his story in this film. I think you could still cut out the “NOOO” moment but leave the rest of the ending intact.

I think your rationalization as to why you should cut that bit of that scene makes sense, it is motivated by characterization, which is the entire theme of this edit, but removing the rest could make things feel unresolved, possibly. Maybe it would work once it is seen, but it is something to consider!

Post
#1104921
Topic
STAR WARS: EP VI -RETURN OF THE JEDI &quot;REVISITED EDITION&quot;<strong>ADYWAN</strong> - <strong>NOW IN PRODUCTION</strong>
Time

doubleofive said:

I believe our Rogue Leader has a whole battalion of troops waiting.

Haha, well if the strike team ever needs reinforcements I’d love to apply, even if it was just to lug the equipment around. I think it would be great for someone to document the process throughout the project as well. I’m sure it’s already been discussed though.

This post has been edited.

Post
#1070279
Topic
The Force Awakens - The Starlight Project
Time

NeverarGreat said:

Here’s what I was able to come up with:
https://vimeo.com/214921566
Password: ren

Getting closer! I’m sort of hearing, “You- You’ll give(me) the map to me” as of now. Like, the “you” part seems to jump and sounds like I’m hearing “me” quickly after “give”. I’m guessing you’re going for, “You will give the map to me”, right? Anyway, I know this is hard but I think it is almost there, and the cut itself looks good.

Post
#1069992
Topic
The Force Awakens - The Starlight Project
Time

NeverarGreat said:

If I could manipulate Kylo’s line to be ‘You will give the map to me’ then Rey’s appropriation of that sentence structure in the next scene would make a lot more sense. If that worked, I doubt that I would keep the split scenes, and would settle for a more subtle edit in this section.

I think this is the best solution. Better to change less if possible rather than more. Kylo already “kind of” says it, like, “And now you’ll give it to me.” Maybe the proceeding back and forth, battle of the wills, that they have going on, you could fit in the line, “You will give me the map” or a similar phrase during that back and forth. It would help parallel Rey’s attempt, who also repeats the phrase until it works.

Post
#1068198
Topic
The Force Awakens - The Starlight Project
Time

DominicCobb said:

Somehow I missed this. I think it mostly works (providing the audio transitions are smoothed up). As much as I really love that Finalizer shot, I don’t think it really makes sense for Kylo to be there. I do kind of like the snow mountain shot in between though.

Neverar mentioned this earlier. I definitely think using the mountain est. shot for both scenes would work the best, and just cut the Finalizer shot. My only concern would be that Vader’s helmet will now be on Starkiller Base rather than the Finalizer, so we could possibly create a continuity error if Vader’s helmet appears in The Last Jedi. But apparently all of the main villains had time to escape Starkiller’s destruction, so I guess you could just hand-wave it and say they just grabbed it before they left.

This post has been edited.

Post
#1068009
Topic
The Force Awakens - The Starlight Project
Time

DominicCobb said:

Yeah I feel like that’s the one I’m sort of leaning towards but it’s hard to know how well it’d work without actually seeing it.

I went ahead and made a rough version where his counsel with Vader is in between Han & Leia’s talk and Rey’s interrogation. Didn’t put the entirety of those two scenes in the video, just enough to get the gist. I also went ahead and put the two Maz scenes back together where the Kylo scene originally was just to see if the transition would work without it in between them. Like I said, it’s rough, but maybe it’ll help you guys decide if this direction is worth pursuing.

https://vimeo.com/213984598

Post
#1057303
Topic
Rogue One: A Star Wars Story - FanEdit Ideas <strong><em>SPOILERS</em></strong>
Time

darthrush said:

I’m going to be making a crawl for Rogue One and I’m very curious if I should have the title text above the main body read just “ROGUE ONE” , or if I should have “A STAR WARS STORY” beneath it. I think I’m leaning towards it just reading “ROGUE ONE”.

If you’re still going to have it open with “STAR WARS” before the crawl rolls in, it might seem strange for it to then say “A STAR WARS STORY”, like it would be redundant. You could use “ANTHOLOGY” instead, I always preferred that. If not that, I would just have it say “ROGUE ONE”.

This post has been edited.

Post
#1054931
Topic
Star Wars Episode III: Labyrinth Of Evil (Finished!)
Time

Hal 9000 said:

I dislike the unnecessary inclusion of the Death Star as part of a very abrupt slideshow of placing everything neatly how it is as ANH begins.
Unfortunately, I think the scene feels ‘edited’ when we have Tarkin joining Palpatine to gaze out the window and miming “I’ll leave you two to it” without the Death Star.

I believe this may have been mentioned before and although this may not be necessary for Hal’s edit, I think a good solution would be to use some photoshop wizardry to put the laser dish on the station’s equator. It would suggest that this is not the same Death Star we see in the OT, but possibly a smaller prototype. This would also connect with the schematics in the Death Star plans the Rebels steal, since that also features a version where the dish is on the equator.

This post has been edited.

Post
#1038988
Topic
TFA: A Gentle Restructure
Time

Hal 9000 said:

Here’s another revision of the crawl that I rather like. This one will probably be what I go with.

Episode VII
THE FORCE AWAKENS

Luke Skywalker has vanished. In his absence, the sinister FIRST ORDER has risen in secret from the ashes of the fallen Empire.

Failing to convince the New Republic to combat this emerging threat, General Leia Organa mobilizes a covert RESISTANCE to gather allies from the farthest reaches of the galaxy.

Desperate for her brother’s help, Leia has sent her most trusted pilot on a daring mission to Jakku, where a clue has been discovered to Luke’s whereabouts…

This is good! I also like “fallen”, but if you wanted to use a word closer to fractured, you could also say, “from the ashes of the shattered Empire.”

Post
#1036283
Topic
TFA: A Gentle Restructure
Time

Sir Ridley said:

And also, Chewies arm can be seen briefly at the edge of the screen and he is seen in the crowd shot as well. Perhaps this could be covered up, to make it seem like he went straight inside.

I would definitely vote to go ahead and just crop him out. Out of sight, out of mind. And JJ himself said it was a mistake on his part. Great job with the music, too!

Post
#1032904
Topic
TFA: A Gentle Restructure
Time

Great work, Sir Ridley! This is really coming together!

NeverarGreat said:
I feel like a broken record saying this yet again, but why isn’t the castle a seething pandemonium when they see the First Order on the attack?

I like to think it is the fact that no one has probably seen a Star Destroyer or TIE Fighters for 30 years, so most of the people are just staring in disbelief at what they’re witnessing. The shock eventually wears off though and they all scream and scatter, like some already have according to the background screams in the initial shots.

Post
#1032346
Topic
Return of the Jedi - Remastered
Time

Yeah, I almost missed it the first time. I had earbuds in when I was watching that part so that might be why I caught it. You may be content with it but I just thought I would point it out to you just in case. If you decide to fix it, the easiest option would be to remove it, or use an earlier line of Boussh’s maybe.

Post
#1032326
Topic
TFA: A Gentle Restructure
Time

Hal 9000 said:

Nah, the movie hasn’t been modified nearly enough to merit that. Not a bad idea, though, with the title motif.
The crawl will merely include a few descriptors for political background, like “…sinister FIRST ORDER has risen in secret from the ashes of the fractured Empire,” and, “Failing to convince the New Republic of this looming threat, General Leia Organa mobilizes a covert RESIATANCE to…”

Cool! I’m glad your using bits of what I had suggested. “mobilizes a covert RESISTANCE” sounds great too.

With Finn saying “They’ve done it.”, it honestly might take a group effort to make it work. Maybe starting from scratch, adding completely new foley, using a different score as others have suggest and then using reworked lines of Finn could really improve that whole sequence. There already seems to be several good ideas that could lead us in the right direction. It definitely gets me excited for V2 as well!

Post
#1032321
Topic
Return of the Jedi - Remastered
Time

darthrush said:

This hasn’t been mentioned before. Could you be a little more specific?

Sure, when Boussh speaks around the 14:45 mark, I believe you can hear the thermal detonator beeping when she speaks. This is when Chewbacca is being taken away. I thought it was Boussh’s lines reused from 14:30, which would explain why you can hear the detonator “beeping”, but I might be wrong.

Post
#1032320
Topic
STAR WARS REBELS: Season 2 : (project will begin early September 2016)
Time

xxtelecine 7xx said:

Someone please correct me if I am wrong is there any point in season 2 where it was explained by a character why her sabers were white? I am a huge SWTOR fan I like have 5 characters in that game, since there is no clear distinct reference outside of a behind the scenes or a online media source from a producer I think I am going to stick with green. I just rendered her first sequence with green. There is no reason why she could not of stuck with her preferred color from the clone wars she was still a light side force wield knight so I would have to think she would have been able to find some green crystals after she left the order shortly before order 66. Filoni & co would have been vetoed on that one by George himself if he was still in the directors chair.

Just as a reference, this is a BTS webisode where Dave Filoni explains his reasoning for giving Ahsoka white/near-white lightsabers at the 3:00 minute mark. Not agreeing with it is totally fine, that is what fan editing is all about after all!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xggYEpemcck

I agree that Lucas usually seemed pretty steadfast when it came to saber colors, but that seemed to start changing before he left. I mean, this is the guy who gave Samuel L. Jackson a purple lightsaber just because he asked for one with no real logic behind it. A Jedi Master in TCW episode “The Wrong Jedi” used a near-white lightsaber when Anakin was fighting Barriss Offee at the Jedi Temple, which you can see at the 2:17 mark. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u6_0Y4nnylA).
This guy’s saber also appears in an earlier episode, “Lightsaber Lost”, which Filoni claimed it to be a very light blue in this Q&A, question 14 (https://www.facebook.com/notes/dave-filoni/qa/10150219391017571), but they clearly made it an almost white if not pure white in the Season 5 episode. It’s possible Lucas became more lax with saber colors during Clone Wars, since he apparently was also the one who came up with the Darksaber (http://www.ign.com/articles/2010/01/28/star-wars-are-you-ready-for-the-mandalorians).

With that said, these are your edits and I think you should go with whatever color you wish. After all, you’re the one putting all of the work into this, not me or anyone else, so you should pick the color you want. I think your reasoning for why she would go with green is sound, doesn’t bother me at all. And if you can go back a little earlier in that Rebels BTS video, Filoni talks about Ahsoka’s outfit and how he imagined her getting this ancient samurai-esque armor from an old Jedi temple somewhere, so if her outfit is an antiquated design, why couldn’t she have found yellow crystals (or the green) at the same place she got the armor? This train of thought actually makes me like the idea of the yellow lightsabers even more. As if she were harkening back to how the Jedi used to be. It would connect it with the Old Republic even more.

Bottom line, I don’t think there is a wrong choice, but I definitely think you should go with green or yellow if that is what you want. It’s the least you deserve for the work you have put into not only this but all of your other projects too. So I’m 100% behind your choice, just thought I would share my initial thoughts as well. Honestly, I’m more worried about how those damn saber-copters can be removed without messing anything else up…

This post has been edited.

Post
#1031017
Topic
STAR WARS REBELS: Season 2 : (project will begin early September 2016)
Time

I agree a lot with ben_danger. If you don’t do white, I would still do a near-white of blue, green or yellow if you do change it. Although I do think KOTOR 2 does feature silver lightsabers, so they do exist in those games as well. The reason I would say keep it white/near-white is because, like others have said, it reflects her being unaffiliated with the Jedi or the Sith, which the Filoni & co. intended I believe. If you go near-white, maybe just a hint of a “Jedi” color would suggest her being still light side oriented.

Also, I’d also love to have the saber-copters removed. The issue, though, is that they seem heavily integrated into the finale episode, and trying to remove them might make the episode feel like there are gaps that should explain how the Inquisitors move around so quickly. The third inquisitor falling to his death due to his saber malfunctioning would also have to be changed. I wish the concept hadn’t have been introduced in the first place, but removing them may prove difficult.

Regardless of your decisions, I also wanted to say that I appreciate all the work you put into this. I know it’s time consuming but the final product is definitely professional quality.

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