Vultural

Plunkett & MacLean - 1999 - 6/10

Freewheeling retelling of a pair of highwaymen.
A fallen criminal pairs up with an impoverished gentleman.
Robbing from the rich and giving to … themselves.
An antidote to glossy productions, this is grubby and dirty.
Where even amorous relations result in sore consequences.
Funny throughout, situations and wordplay, layered with a thoroughly modern dance score.
Truth, ever strange = https://www.irishpost.com/news/irelands-gentleman-highwayman-seven-facts-about-the-irish-outlaw-of-london-hanged-for-his-courteous-crimes-102797

The Old Man And The Sea - 1958 - 6/10

Spencer Tracy in essentially a one man vehicle.
An elderly Cuban fisherman has not caught a “big one” in months.
Until he lands a huge marlin, larger than his boat.
Therein is the drama, how to bring catch back intact, with sharks about.
Not high adventure, but an existential struggle of Man vs. Nature.
Long at 90”, it feels slow, despite lush photography.
I am hardly a Tracy fan, and this is just one more of his films that left me flat.

Fragile - 2019 - 7/10

An off-road auto crash leaves two men dead.
Both were apparently strangers: Felix from a wealthy family, Dom working class.
As police try to put together why they were in the same truck, the back story unfolds.
That is also the trick to this well crafted Canadian series.
It is fairly clear, the crash was no accident.
The small town isn’t so much a nest of secrets, as it is of longings and frustrations.
As well as buried wrongs and long held resentments.

Atlantis, The Lost Continent - 1961 - 5/10

Two fishermen rescue a shipwrecked female, then take her back to her home.
Turns out, she is a princess of Atlantis!
Is there a reward? Nope, just slave labor for our eagle scouts.
Turns out there is a power struggle for the kingdom.
Big budget sword and sandal has interesting effects, but no script.
Expensive and stupid.
My favorite was the energy crystal death ray gizmo, which was swiped from Archimedes.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Archimedes’_heat_ray

Theater Camp - 2023 - 7/10

Theatre aspirants, register immediately!
Summer camp for children smitten with the acting bug.
Trouble behind the scenes, however, as the founder has suffered a stroke and the finances are dire.
Not to fear, her dimwitted son is bursting with ideas.
Kids rehearse, counselors nurse grievances, crises erupt.
Missing anything? How about, the bank is ready to foreclose.
A jewel for fans of theatre, especially musical theatre.
Fans of Connie And Carla, of Waiting For Guffman, shoot, Footlight Parade (1933), hurry to find your seats already!

The Iron Commissioner - 1978 - 5/10
AKA - Il Commissario di Ferro

Mauro is a one-man police unit. Backup? Ordinary patrolmen? Who needs ’em?
Almost single-handedly, he busts a kidnapping ring.
When a few escape, he begins the hunt.
Mauro neglects his family, doesn’t bother going to HQ.
Thereby missing out when a terrorist takes over his office.
Two unconnected storylines, neither compelling.
Half baked, rushed Euro-Crime clone.

Space Sweepers - 2021 - 5/10
AKA - Seungriho // 승리호

Space janitors sweep debris from orbit. Defunct satellites, crushed vessels, bodies …
The crew of the Victory finds a small girl, who turns out to be an android, who is actually a mega-bomb.
Will the crew bond with their find? Will conspiracy types stop at nothing to acquire the “child”?
Best suited for families, others will find this cringe time.
Aside from a few characters, everyone has the maturity of eight-year-olds.
Sadly, like many Korean films this is overlong. Action sequences go on and on.
Heroics are never ending. Everything is excess overload.
Again, for families – children – this will be OK.

I Love This Dirty Town - 1969 - 6/10

Margaret Drabble bemoans the transition of the city into suburbia.
One realizes the city, for her, is dozens, if not hundreds, of small villages.
Freestanding green-grocers and butchers, instead of Tesco and Marks & Spencers.
Independent chemists, rather than Boots. Pedestrians over the motor car.
Her complaints likely resonated when Romans organized Londinium.
Ever the battle between developers and residents.
James Mason explored this topic in The London Nobody Knows (1969).
Suggs turned the lens towards places on the verge of extinction in Disappearing London (2006).

The Phantom Empire - 1935 - 5/10

Oh, man. One of the most absurd serials ever, and mightily entertaining!
The lost civilization of Mu is somehow underneath the Western desert.
More than that, it is underneath Gene Autry’s Radio Ranch.
He and his cowpokes find it, but the Muranian Queen does not want surface dwellers near her kingdom.
Meanwhile, there are the usual villains, greedy land developers who cover Radio Ranch!
All sorts of shenanigans keep Gene and his friends galloping across the sagebrush.
Still, he finds time to sing daily at 2:00.
Did I mention Mu robots wearing metal Stetsons?

Zorro’s Fighting Legion - 1939 - 7/10

For a Saturday matinee serial, this is full of exciting adventures.
High filmmaking artistry?
The Lord of Gold (Don Del Oro), with plans to become emperor, steals gold shipments.
Enter Zorro, and his band of …ahem … singing men.
OK, they mostly sing the “We Ride” song.
This is set in Mexico, not California, though villagers immediately recognize the hero.
Excellent budget for this Republic serial, star power (Reed Hadley), outstanding stunts.
Best DVD copy is the restoration by Serial Squadron.

Photographing Fairies - 1997 - 6/10

Following the death of his fiancée, Charles enlists and enters the Great War.
Afterwards, he makes a living photographing death servicemen with their families.
All the while, however, he is a haunted soul.
He is drawn into the world of faeries, particularly capturing images of them.
To do this, he begins taking hallucinogens.
Moreover, he incurs the wrath of a fundamentalist reverend, concerned about faeries and paganism.
There is a lot in this film, and it is, in many ways, richer than Fairy Tale (1997).

Shakespeare In Love - 1998 - 7/10

Nicely told fairy tale of the famous playwright hitting writer’s block.
The cure? A clandestine affair with a lady betrothed to powerful Lord Wessex.
Instead of a typical romance, this bounces freely across the theatre boards.
Struggling acting companies, arcane legal restrictions, figuring out what the punter want.
And will play for.
Paltrow and Fiennes have exciting chemistry; the whole cast is top notch.
For worries, dialogue is NOT Elizabethan English.
Terrific date movie.

A Woman Of No Importance - 2017 - 7/10

Young Gerald is hired to be secretary for Lord Illingworth.
Unaware that the Lord is his actual father, who seduced then abandoned his mother years earlier.
At a soiree of the gentry, Gerald’s mother, Mrs. Arbuthnot arrives, as does an outspoken American heiress,
This rendition by Spring Theatre is of two halves, and feels like two different works.
The first section sparkles with witty, at times trenchant, dialogue, barbed and cynical.
The second, however, is a confrontation between Illingworh and Arbuthnot.
Wit is replaced by resentment, and bracing accusation of the double standard between men and women.
Very much an early pre-feminist or proto-feminist work.
Plus, a trio of unexpected, delightful songs!

Blue Thunder - 1983 - 6/10

LAPD pilot is assigned to train on a new, cutting edge helicopter.
Designed for riots or crowd control, this beast is military assault.
In due course, our pilot (a coasting Roy Scheider) suspects nefarious forces.
The film wanders all over thriller, voyeurism, mystery, even romance.
The plot feels like concepts cobbled together by the writer, oops writers, and the result is messy.
Action pieces are standout, however. Malcolm McDowell terrific as villain.
Surveillance paranoia dated today as CC and drones are daily realities.

Little, Bentley - Indignities Of The Flesh

Referencing Machen’s Hieroglyphics, this is a collection of reading matter.
Stories neither horrific nor frightening, nor particularly memorable. Any of them would be suitable for Readers Digest.

From teeth brushing to whacking the piñata to crafting gingerbread men to foiling Disney thugs.

“Even The Dead” stands out as a melancholy tale, while “Pray 4 Baby” sets up a tone of dread in the stifling desert.

If this had been a paperback, I would have left my copy in any airport terminal for the next curious reader. In a phrase, this is a travel read. Disposable.

A few years ago, gushing readers compared Mr Little to Stephen King.
I don’t see it.

A Simple Favor - 2018 - 7/10

Single mom Stephanie is the go-getter volunteer for school activities.
Behind the smiles, she is lonely, and doesn’t have much of a life.
Until she meets fellow parent Emily, ballbreaking PR for a New York agency.
Obvious misfits, yet they strike an odd friendship,
So much so, when Emily disappears Stephanie becomes a sleuth.
Not only a decent mystery, this is a savage parody of vlogs, influencers, and Hallmark derivatives.
Deceptively written, skillfully potted, though with enough foul language to send paper hearts running.
Your squeeze suggests another mystery romance, queue this screamingly funny gem instead.

Crime Doctor - 1943 - 6/10

Kicked from a speeding car, the man is rescued, taken to hospital.
Revives. Oh, no! Amnesia.
So, like so many who have lost their memory, he goes to medical school and becomes a doctor.
Of course, amnesia or not, somebody pushed him from the car.
B-film crime thriller shuffles at a brisk pace, leaving numerous clues who the doctor had been previously.
No great shakes, but adequate entertainment.
First of the Crime Doctor series.
Ray Collins plays his initial doctor, later partner, and his character already resembles Lt. Tragg.

Kill Zone - 2005 - 7/10
AKA - Saat po Long // 殺破狼

Chief inspector Chung has tried to nail crime boss Wong Po for years.
Chung, now with a brain tumor, is set to retire and hand the reins to Kwan.
Yet, he still wants to toss Wong Po behind bars, even if that means breaking the law.
Straightforward Hong Kong actioner boasts three top stars.
Simon Yam as the inspector. Sammo Hung, cast against type as the deadly Po.
And Donnie Yen, in absolute peak form!
The photography in this bleak, Neo Noir is outstanding.
Numerous fights in this, all dazzling showstoppers.

Pickup - 1951 - 6/10

After his dog is killed, Jan heads to the town carnival for a new puppy.
There, he crosses paths with Betty, a low-life floozy who wants a good time.

She is also distressingly poor, and smells money on the lonely man.
Soon enough, she weds him, then schemes to make herself a rich widow.
Trashy Noir benefits from Beverly Michaels’ surly, contemptuous performance.
Offbeat film, more cult than Noir classic.

Reefer Madness - 1936 - 5/10

I had assumed every film buff in the world had seen this one.
Wrong. I was informed, it’s black and white, from the 1930’s. So passé.
Moralizing tale is so over-the-top preachy, it proves an irresistible delight.
Teenagers get caught up in the world of reefer, weed, jive, marijuana.
They engage in uninhibited sex, run stop lights, play the piano faster … and faster!

Or suffer complete and utter mental deterioration. Insanity!
Unintentionally funny, although the underground enjoyment was heightened owing to laws up to recent times.
Possibly because this is public domain, and was cheap to begin with, I have never seen a fine print.

Night Shift - 2018 - 6/10

Bianca is reinstated for active duty, just before partner Tony is about to transfer.
First, however, Tony has a debt.
“Cops with a history” short, soon splatters into a mixed martial arts brawl.
Subs = https://subscene.com/subtitles/night-shift-2018/english/3168199

Fantastic Voyage - 1966 - 7/10

An important scientist in a coma needs a miracle!
How about we miniaturize a small submarine, crew, and surgeons?
How small? The size of a blood platelet. The future, today!
Once injected into the bloodstream, viewers are given the grand tour of the inner body.
Very impressive back in the day, and still great entertainment so long as you don’t nitpick 1960’s science.
I vividly recall seeing this with my family on big screen. My younger brother had previously read the comic adaptation, and when one character appeared, he blurted out, “That’s a bad one. Who gets killed in the end.” We all yelled.

Wings In The Dark - 1935 - 6/10

Daredevil pilot works on inventing “auto-pilot” in his spare time.
Countless rejections from fellow pilots, airplane companies, investors.
Following an accident, his is blinded … for a while, or forever.
A female barnstormer, smitten, performs stunt work to raise funds.
Brief premise in pretty offbeat tale.
More drama than adventure or romance.
Main draw is a young Cary Grant paired with Myrna Loy.

Dead Ringers - 1988 - 7/10

Disturbing film (particularly to female audiences) of identical twin brothers, both gynecologists.
One is a Casanova, preying on his patients. The other, mild mannered, appreciates discards and leftovers.
After an emotional triangle erupts, drug abuse from one leads to sanity unraveling.
Jeremy Irons is dazzling as the twin brothers,
I freely confess I found it hard to separate the pair as the story progressed.
The unpredictability of behavior is what proves so unsettling – not to mention new surgical instruments.
Loosely based on reality = https://www.esquire.com/news-politics/a35522434/marcus-twins-gynecologists-death-story.

Maneater Of Hydra - 1967 - 5/10
AKA - La Isla de la Muerte // Island Of The Doomed

No, no, no! Listen up, potential turistas.
No matter how far off the beaten track you want to go, you don’t ever want to go to no deserted island.
Especially if the lone inhabitant is a scientist, or researcher, or doctor, who likely needs guinea pigs.
Baron von Weser welcomes his guests, whereupon the stroll, and the deaths, begin.
His specialty is carnivorous plants. Small ones, that feast on mice.
No one would make large plants, would they?
Endearingly bad movie, which boasts atrocious dubbing (part of its charm) and decent acting.
The print has never been restored (as of 2023) and it remains 7th generation.